---
“May I have everyone’s attention, please?”
Len looked up from his laptop. He’d been sitting in the conference room going over his notes and schedule of interviews. Dwight was speaking. Len had already learned that this could be interesting. He thought about reaching for the camera, but it was too late at this point; a speech caught mid-way through was of no use. He wondered if he’d get approval for a second unit in the office, or at least a second cameraman.
“I have drafted a list of ground rules for what we will and will not say to the stranger in our midst,” he jerked a thumb over his shoulder at Len, who suddenly found all the eyes of the office on him at once, some looking sympathetic, others suspicious. This seemed to happen around here a lot, but he wasn’t used to it yet.
“Corporate has already published a list of guidelines agreed to by both the company and the production crew and sent them around,” said a sad man in the back of the room. He had thinning red hair and a tired face.
“I have read them and they are just not good enough, Toby. What if he sells our sales secrets to our competitors, huh? What if Stamford finds out about our sales leads and undercuts us to avoid downsizing? How do we know that this ‘documentarian’ is not an Osprey Operative?”
“He is no Oprey Osperative…Osperative…he’s not a spy, Dwight, okay, so shut it,” said Michael, standing in the doorway to his office. “He’s here to make us all stars.”
“Have you tested his loyalty, Michael? Have you subjected him to trials that will reveal where his true loyalty lies?” Dwight challenged.
“You mean torture?” Jim said in a bemused voice from his chair.
“I never used that word,” Dwight said quickly.
“Really, because I could swear I heard you specifically use the word ‘torture.’”
“Um, I know what I said, Jim, and I didn’t say that,” Dwight scoffed.
“I heard him say it too,” said Pam in a scared voice that Len was fairly certain she was faking. “Dwight was openly advocating for torture. It makes me feel afraid in the workplace.”
“That’s a fireable offense, Dwight,” Jim said knowingly.
Len could see that doubt as to what he had really said had crept into Dwight’s mind, and with a huff he sat down and began typing vigorously on his computer. Jim and Pam shared a glance and half-smile with one another. Definitely need to get a second unit here.
Michael stepped into the conference room, put his arm around Len, and walked him to the door. “You are part of our family now, Len, our office family. I am your brother, Phyllis is your frumpy grandmother, Angela is your hot grandmother—“
“Michael!” Angela shouted angrily.
“I’m sorry, hot aunt,” Michael said. Angela scowled and pursed her lips. “And Pam is your sexy cousin that you wanna get biz-ay with but can’t.” Pam looked incredulous and exhausted at the same time, meeting first Jim’s then Len’s eyes. “You, Lensman, are our…distant relative from a faraway land, here to learn about our customs. You’re the friend of everyone here. Except for Toby. Why are you even out here, Toby? Go back to your little corner and do whatever it is you do all day.” Toby turned and left.
Len decided he should probably say something now before Michael went on. It’s not like the cameras were on or anything.
“Well, thanks Michael, I appreciate that. I just want everyone to know that I am not here to conduct corporate espionage or anything like that. What I’m trying to do here is show the world what the American workplace is like today. What makes you tick, what you do, what challenges you face in your office everyday. I know we went over this in the contracts and the introductory meeting a few weeks ago, but I want you to feel confident that I will do whatever I can to respect you and your company.”
The fat man in the back started clapping, then stopped when he saw that no one else was joining him Kevin was his name. Len had meant to ask if he’d been hired through a special program, but wasn’t sure how to broach the subject.
“I’ll be in there if anyone has any questions.” Len gestured over his shoulder toward the conference room.
The old man who usually sat in the back of the office playing solitaire and eating unidentified little sprouts from a damp paper towel slowly approached Dwight. “You want to torture the outsider, I can offer up my services,” he whispered. “I can get you information for $50, reprogram him for $75, and disappear him for $100…”
---
“I’m surprised he’s still here,” Pam said over a bag of chips in the break room. She and Jim always shared their afternoon snack together.
“He said he’s filmed a lot of crazy in his career, I’m sure this was nothing.” Jim replied.
“Yeah but where else but with the Taliban would he have to listen to the subjects of his film openly talk about torturing him to test his loyalty?”
“That’s a fair point, I guess,” Jim said. “I wonder if we can get Dwight to apply to the CIA.”
Pam chuckled. “They could send him letters or something about a secret mission that they need his skills for.”
“But of course only after he proves his loyalty by telling them all of his deepest, darkest secrets.” Jim said. They laughed. Len decided to make his presence known at this point. Pam immediately stopped laughing and averted her eyes.
“Relax, I don’t have the camera, and I don’t bite,” he said. Jim gave him a friendly smile.
Drinks at Poor Richard’s a few weeks ago had been a good idea. Jim had loosened up quite a bit outside of the office. Jim was a Sixers fan and Len was a Celtics fan, so they spent quite a bit of time trashing each other’s teams, but in the friendly way that people tease each other. Jim had filled him in on the foibles of some of his coworkers that Len might want to keep an eye out for: when and what Meredith was drinking during the day, what Len might find inside Dwight’s desk drawers, and told him to make sure he had the camera on anytime Creed said anything. Oh, and Kelly. “Avoid engaging Kelly in conversation at all costs.” Len and Kelly hadn’t really talked that night, but from a distance she didn’t seem so bad: she seemed friendly and animated, if a bit chatty.
Pam, on the other hand, was still pretty closed off to him, like she was with everyone else. She seemed like a very sweet person, albeit painfully shy and perhaps a little drained after her years of dealing with both Michael and Roy. Anxious, maybe. Len’s sister had been plagued by anxiety for years, and it often kept her from breaking out of her old habits and trying new things. There would be time to learn that. Len could get her to talk. He could tell that if Jim trusted him, Pam was likely to trust him, too.
“What about Pam?” Len had asked Jim at Poor Richard’s.
“What about her?” Jim replied loudly. The bar was busy and Jim’s volume had gone up after a few beers.
“She seems really nice, but she also seems really quiet.”
Jim shrugged. “She’s just shy. Once you get to know her, you’ll see her personality, and it’s really awesome. She’s hilarious, and fun, and kind, a really, really, kind person.”
“Good, I was worried I might be offending her or something.” Len said.
“No, she’s great. One of the best parts of working for Dunder-Mifflin.” Jim said.
On the way to back from the bar, Len had frantically called his producer, Gerry, and told him about the love triangle aspect of the office. Gerry had seemed intrigued by it. It wasn’t often that a documentary had a storyline like that built right in.
“How much interaction have you seen?” Gerry had asked.
“I’ve only filmed today, but I’m telling you, there’s something there. They aren’t talking about it much, I just have to see them from afar.”
“Maybe that’s not such a bad thing,” Gerry said. “If you get them saying one thing and doing another, that plays right into it.”
“So I should just keep doing what I’m doing?”
“Yeah, but butter them up a little bit. Be friendly with them. Get them to let their guard down around you. Then you might see even more.”
“Hey, I’m sorry about all that with Michael and Dwight,” Jim said back in the break room to Len, who was approaching the coffee machine. “I mean it’s probably not a shock to you by now, after the diversity seminar and Meredith’s ‘birthday’ party, but it’s not easy to be on the receiving end of it, especially your first time.”
“We don’t think he can help it,” Pam said. “Even though we really wish he could.”
“Oh, please, that was nothing,” Len said. “May I?” They nodded and he took a seat with them. “But what he said about you, Pam…I mean I’m kind of glad I didn’t have the camera. You could have been more humiliated and he could have been fired.”
“Oh, it’s okay,” Pam said. She was still quiet but visibly relaxing. “It’s not the worst thing he’s ever said to me.”
“That seems like a pretty low bar then,” Len said. “But like you said, it’s not surprising to me. Just three weeks and I think I’ve got enough film evidence for anyone who wants to file a sexual harassment suit.” They softly chuckled and then fell silent. The idea of trying to sue Michael or even get him fired didn’t seem to appeal to him. Despite all of his antics, it seemed like the workers got a fair amount of freedom to do things other than work, which must make it worthwhile to them.
“At least it’s not boring, right?” Len asked, changing his approach.
They shrugged. “Selling paper is pretty boring, but our meetings definitely are not,” Jim said. “That doesn’t make them pleasant or appropriate, but definitely not boring.”
“I discovered a long time ago that it was better to be amused than horrified at what I see,” Pam said. “Though sometimes he goes too far.” She became quiet and stared at the table. Jim stared at her with concern in his eyes. Len stared at them both.
Len knew she was talking about the “prank” Michael had pulled on her on the temp’s first day. How she’d cried and called her boss a jerk. Michael hadn’t quite gone that far again. He was capable of learning, albeit the hard way.
“Do you ever work on your art in the office, Pam?” Len asked.
Pam looked embarrassed. “Um, sometimes when I’m not busy I do little sketches of what I see, or things from memory, but it’s not, like, art or anything.”
“Don’t listen to her, it is art and she’s just great at it. You should really show him your drawings, Pam, they’re really good.” Pam smiled. “Seriously, Len, next time she leaves her desk I’ll show you what drawer to look in.” Pam swatted Jim playfully in the arm.
Len chuckled. “Not sure I’ll ever have to resort to theft, but if you ever feel like showing off your stuff, let me know, I’ll be glad to film it." Pam smiled at him, not a broad smile, but a genuine one.
Len looked at his watch. "Anyway, I’d better get back to work, I’m interviewing Oscar in five minutes and I still have to set everything up.
“See ya,” Jim said.
“Bye, Len,” said Pam with a little wave.
As he left the room he could hear Pam whisper to Jim, "You were right, he is a nice guy."
"Told you," Jim replied. "Nothing to worry about."
Len walked out of the break room and around the corner toward the door. When he was sure Jim and Pam weren’t looking, he retrieved the camera from its hiding place. Upon reaching the break room, he plugged the camera into his laptop and reviewed what he’d shot. Jim and Pam were squarely in the frame, and he was just outside it. He’d caught everything.
Author's Chapter Notes:
Full speed ahead through Season 1! This takes place sometime between Alliance and Basketball.
Disclaimer: I don't own anything.
Disclaimer: I don't own anything.
Chapter End Notes:
Thanks for reading! I appreciate the reviews that have been left so far and am hoping for more (good or bad)!
