Jim has finally returned to Scranton! It's interesting how Pam's excitement for his return is directly contracted by Jim's apprehension. In Branch Closing, Jim alluded to the fact that he didn't think he was ready to face Pam. This foreshadowed events in The Merger. It's very easy to angry at Jim for his somewhat cold and distant behavior. However, can we really blame him? We knew Jim was badly hurt on Casino Night. He uprooted his entire life as a result. Having to go back and face that pain is unthinkable. It makes perfect sense that he should build a wall to protect himself.
Jim's behavior also shows that he is in more pain than we previously thought. It looked like he was starting to get past it in Stamford. He's flirting with someone new and he was able to hold a fairly lighthearted conversation with Pam. However, back in Scranton it's all right in front of him again. He doesn't have the geographic distance to protect him anymore, so he has to create emotional distance. He had an incredibly difficult time being around Pam. He made conscious efforts to avoid her attention, that is until the parking lot scene. It's here where Jim lets the wall down a little bit, only to smack directly into the one Pam has built. It should be an interesting journey watching these two tiptoe around each other!
With Karen in Stamford:
As the Stamford office is packing up in Andy's "tasteful" hats, we get a bit of a teaser regarding Karen and Jim's relationship. Jim is much more relaxed around her than we have ever seen him. He's also playful with her when giving her a high five. He also cheerful with his "See ya later." It's obvious these two have become closer. There are a million ways to interpret his "See ya later," as it could mean that night or next week. We simply don't know. But, this scene does give us some clues that Jim will be hanging around Karen in Scranton.
Hugging Pam:
The moment we've all been waiting for finally arrives as Jim walks through the Scranton office door. Jim gets his first dose of familiarity with a Michael greeting. But he's rescued when Michael's attention drifts to newcomer Martin Nash. It's here where we see some interesting expressions on Jim's face.
As he walks in, his eyes drift towards Pam. They stay locked in that line of sight for a few seconds before he realizes it and looks away. He's under her spell again, but he's only partially aware of it. He looks down for a moment and pulls himself together. When he looks up he has his usual casual face in place. Despite, his apprehension and reluctance to return to Scranton, he actually wants to see Pam. He can't help it. This is easily seen in another facial expression.
As Michael is welcoming Martin, Jim looks at Pam again with one of his "what is Michael doing" faces. He sending her a humorous non-verbal cue. He's also telling her he'll be there in a minute. Old habits die hard. Jim even starts to look a little anxious while waiting for Martin and Michael to move out of his way. This can be attributed to two factors. One, he wants to get to Pam. Two, he is nervous about seeing Pam again and wants to get the first encounter over with as quickly as possible. He doesn't want to put it off any longer. It's combination of both, but the latter is the most dominant.
Once he finally makes to Pam's desk he can see the excitement on her face and this scares him a little bit. Jim reverts to his favorite tactic of masking his feelings and nerves: humor. He is also feeling the immense awkwardness between them, so he says "Hi I'm Jim. I'm new here." This is a vintage Jim ploy to ease the awkwardness. Part of me believes he had this line planned beforehand. It came off way too polished to be a spur of the moment joke.
Jim was not prepared for Pam to hug him. He was surprised when she threw her arms around him. He's already thrown off by Fancy New Beesly, (FNB). As surprised as he is at her actions, he's also wearing a great big smile. He's happy for the hug. However, he was ready for it to end when it does. He was just starting to get uncomfortable just before she let go. This is where he knows he has to put up a wall**. He knows he'll be in trouble if he doesn't.
As mentioned in Branch Closing, Jim knows he'll fall harder for Pam if he's not careful. He doesn't want to open himself up for another heartbreak. Jim doesn't immediately make eye contact with Pam after the hugs ends. He doesn't want her to see his nervousness or any of his feelings. He again tries to hide behind humor by going back to his earlier joke. He likes it that she engages in playful banter with "I know. I don't care." But it's not enough. This time the humor didn't totally alleviate the awkwardness. Cue small talk. He doesn't know what to say after the humor dissipates, so he goes with a neutral and natural statement, "It's good to be back." Interestingly, he makes eye contact with this statement and is smiling kindly at Pam. This is one of his patented "looks," it's just camouflaged with a casual statement. He is clearly still in love with her.
Here's where it gets interesting. Jim next says "The place looks really good." He looks Pam up and down when he says this, but never makes eye contact. He's not talking about the office appearance, he's telling her that she looks really good. Pam actually catches this and says "It's really good to see you, " with the subtext being "so do you." At this point, there is nothing left to say. The awkwardness is still lingering and really neither knows what to do about it.
**Sidebar: Reasons Why Jim Creates a Wall
At this point I feel it's necessary to assess the reasons why Jim is building an emotional wall around himself. It's a little harder to be angry at his cold behavior when these aspects are taken into account.
Jim is obviously happy to see Pam, but he is also wary. He is fully aware of the pitfalls with her. She can be his downfall if he's not careful. Jim knows he'll fall for her again (not to mention he's still not over the last time) and even harder than before. He feels he must stay away or he will get hurt again. It really boils down to protecting himself.
Jim is also reminding himself that she told him "no" three times. Why torture himself? He has to tell himself "she made her choice and it wasn't me." He has to force himself to separate himself from her or he'll be in the same position he was before: In love with someone who can't or doesn't want to be with him.
Finally, he's still hurting from the events of Casino Night. He holds her partially responsible for the way things turned out. He's fully aware that he brought some of it on himself by telling her, but he's also sure he didn't misread the relationship. She just decided not be with him. That kind of rejection stings the most. He doesn't want to set himself up for another rejection, nor does he want to get hurt like that again.
Talking Head:
In Jim's first talking head he is asked where he stands with Pam. He is uncomfortable with the question. Apparently, his wall doesn't just apply to Pam. It applies to the relationship in general. He's decided to disconnect himself from the past as much as possible. As he said in Branch Closing, he's just not ready to face the situation. Part of him just doesn't want to know. He's trying to get away from the relationship.
Jim finally answers that he has no idea where he stands. It's been a while since he's been in the same room with Pam, the separation from her has left him in the dark. FNB has already thrown him for a loop. Plus, the Initiation conversation is confusing in itself. He's still under the impression that she ended the conversation abruptly to get rid of him. Jim takes the safe route and says "we're friends."
This is a comfort zone answer as well as a defense mechanism. He doesn't want to reveal too many of his feelings to the camera. He repeats it with "We've always been friends." This statement has a couple of connotations. First, he's reminding himself of the rejection and that fact that he's never been able to get past this phase in their relationship (except very briefly with the kiss). It's easy to see the pain on his face and hear it in his voice, not to mention a teensy bit of frustration. Second, he's forcing himself to see her as just a friend. He simply can't let himself think about her any other way.
The Desk:
Well, we were pretty much wrong about this one! Surprisingly, Jim really wanted his desk back! Jim is resigned to the fact that he is indeed back in Scranton. He's home. It only makes sense that he would want to create a familiar sense of normalcy by reclaiming his old desk. He needs the comfort associated with his desk to counteract the uncomfortable situation with Pam. Plus, Karen's desk runs directly parallel with his old desk. He wants to be near her.
Oddly enough, the feeling of being an outcast again plagues Jim. When Ryan pushes him out of his desk Jim's face has a Stamfordesque expression of the outcast. He's so thrown off by Ryan's behavior that Jim gets clumsy as he's heading to his new desk. He drops his bag and shuffles over to his new location. Something tells me he won't be there for long. He'll get his old desk back one way or another!
Conference Room:
Jim looks a little uncomfortable with Pam sitting next to him. He's purposely not looking at her and he's turned slightly away from her. He has his hands folded and interlocked on the table, which is not a usual stance for Jim. It's possible that he's nervous and he's trying to look relaxed. Jim is also not talking to Pam, despite the fact that Michael is giving him plenty of reasons to lean over and joke around. He's forcing himself not to.
However, his resolve at silence breaks down as Michael begins the meeting. Jim quietly says "This looks promising" in his usual sarcastic style, but he's careful not to completely direct it at Pam. He doesn't look at her until the very end of the statement. He's saying it to himself, but he can't resist the temptation to say it to Pam at the last minute. Again, old habits die hard. He briefly makes eye contact but it's broken when Karen taps Jim with an offer for gum. Jim looks relieved and thankful for this little rescue. He was in danger of falling into the Pam trap. Karen gave him an escape route.
He forces himself not to return his attention to Pam. His wall is again firmly in place. He again turns his body slightly away from her and more so than before. It almost looks like he's feigning interest in everything Michael is saying an doing. Seriously, when was the last time Jim was so attentive at a meeting? He's obviously using the meeting as an excuse to avoid Pam.
Karen's Voicemail Message:
This scene was tough to watch as it parallels the type of banter that usually passes between Jim and Pam. Karen is now on the receiving end of Jim's playful taunts. He's joking with her the same way he would with Pam. He's compensating for the fact that he can't do this with Pam anymore. Karen is giving him an outlet and a place to go in an office that is crowded with the past. Furthermore, it shows he likes her.
There's been some fierce debates concerning Jim's feelings towards Karen. This scene lends to the argument that he is attracted to her and that he genuinely enjoys her company. (I know JAM fans don't want to hear this, but remember we need Karen in order for JAM to happen! Patience.)
The Break Room:
Jim is a little startled when Pam comes into the conference room. He breaks eye contact immediately after returning her "hey." This situation is exactly what he's trying to avoid. He doesn't want to be alone with her during the workday. He's afraid of not only what might happen, but also losing control of his feelings. She's got him cornered right now and he doesn't like it. His defensive wall is firmly in place.
Pam starts off by asking him about his switch from grape soda to water. Jim immediately jumps at the chance to use humor. This seems to be a recurring tactic! He tells her he's "moving away from that." and that he's "getting into a bottled water phase." He says this very playfully with a bit of sarcasm attached. This is a defensive move to keep the situation light and hide his feelings.
However, there is a second level to this part of the conversation. The writers have cleverly inserted an analogy that foreshadows future events in the episode. The two drinks represent the two women in Jim's life. Grape soda = Pam and bottled water = Karen. Jim makes the statement that he's trying to "move past" grape soda a.k.a. Pam. How true is that? He is trying to move past Pam. He also says he's moving into a "bottled water phase" a.k.a. Karen. Again this mirrors Jim's current activities. Later in the episode we see him getting much closer to Karen in the parking lot and on the phone. It is promising that the word "phase" was used. Karen is just a phase.
Jim responds to Pam's "you've changed so much" with an equally humor tinged "I'm evolving Pam." Again, there is more to this statement than simple humor. He's trying to tell her that he's different and so is their relationship. He is aware that she has an expectation that things will magically return to the way they were before. Her behavior throughout the day has sent him this message. Despite the implications of his statement, notice the expression on his face. He's made eye contact with her and he's wearing another one of those patented "looks," only this time it's disguised in humor. He's well aware that he's slipped a little. He has to remind himself that their relationship must be different and so must he. The wall is about to get stronger and taller.
His realization here gives him the courage to say no to Pam during the next phase of the conversation. Jim is really thrown off by FNB asking him out for coffee. He is at a loss for words as he stumbles with "Oh . . um." He knows exactly what she is doing, but he can't believe it. This is not a "just friends catching up" outing. At this point, Jim is not making steady eye contact and he's fidgeting with his water bottle. He is clearly nervous about how to get out of the situation.
He grabs onto the out of "still unpacking" that Pam supplies in her request. He plays it smart by rephrasing it as "still settling in." At the end of his answer he does give Pam eye contact with a nod. He's begging her to "buy" his excuse. He hoping she won't see right through him. He's relieved that she doesn't press the issue any further. The odd thing is he does want to go, but the wall gets in the way. He had a hard time telling her no. The problem is he's simply not ready to be that close to her. He doesn't trust himself yet. He again breaks eye contact when she leaves the door open for another time. He just doesn't know if there will ever be a "right" time.
Just when Jim thinks he's cleared the hurdle, Michael strolls into the break room and creates an even more awkward situation. Now Jim is cornered on two sides. He's managed to get this far without the past shaking him and Michael could blow it. The last thing Jim needs is Michael dredging up the past. Jim is terrified that Michael will bring up the relationship, even if inadvertently. Jim has managed to maintain control of the situation thus far and he doesn't want to lose that control. He also doesn't want Pam to know that Michael knows as much as he does. Jim tries to keep the mood light with "No, you're not interrupting anything." He's trying to send Michael a message to back off, but of course an oblivious Michael misses it and continues.
Jim sends a stronger message with "Don't." I can almost hear an addition to this in his internal dialogue, "Don't . . . do this to me." He is begging Michael to drop it. The desperation and pain in his voice is readily apparent. He came close to losing it here. He recoils by looking down at the floor. He doesn't dare look at Pam or let her see his face. He doesn't want her to even know he's still hurting. This can be attributed to his ego and pride (we all have it, not just men!). He doesn't want to talk about it or even think about it in this setting. It's too public and Michael is there as well. He is just trying to get through the day without any drama or any more difficulty. It's easy to sense Jim's frustration with himself and the situation as he stares at the floor. Not only is he trying to pull himself together, he also asking himself "Why does she still get to me?"
Jim knows Pam picked up on something during the exchange between Michael and himself. He knows he let some of his emotions slip out. Time for damage control. When he picks up his head he has a happy face and makes direct eye contact. He quickly changes the subject before she can say another word to him. He can tell she wants to say something. It doesn't matter that she is trying to send a humorous non-verbal cue to Jim. Jim can tell she probably wants to talk about Michael, but he doesn't want to chance it. The conversation could easily move towards their relationship again. He doesn't want to talk about it in this setting even if it's on a humorous level. His subject change is also an exit he creates for himself. He tells her he has to get back to work and takes his leave.
Parking Lot #1:
As everyone heads out to the parking lot to inspect their flattened tires, Jim doesn't even look at Pam as he leaves. He is focused on Karen and is probably glad she came up to him. He is still cautiously avoiding Pam. It's also notable that he does not hang out with Pam in the parking lot. There's no camera footage, but it's a safe assumption that he was hanging out with Karen as he walk out with her and was still with her upon returning inside.
Jim was extremely comfortable with Karen rubbing his back. He is at ease and he is smiling at her attention. This scene explains part of Jim's attraction to Karen. He doesn't have to try with her. She gives him attention freely and willingly. There's no guesswork. Pam never gave him this luxury.
Parking Lot #2 (Night):
Another insight into Jim and Karen's relationship is apparent in this scene. They have swapped cell phone numbers. He knew it was her before answering his phone, she's caller ID'd in his phone. Again, he refers to her by her last name, (he did it before in Diwali). This is something Jim has done with Pam as well. He's transferred this to Karen. It's a sign that he likes Karen and he's comfortable with her. He easily agrees to out for drinks with her. This is in sharp contrast to his response to Pam's request for coffee. So why no to Pam, but yes to Karen? It's simple. She's easier to hang out with instead of Pam. He can relax with Karen. There's no emotional baggage accompanied with awkwardness.
Jim is quick to cut Karen off when he sees Pam emerging from the building. His quick response to her presence indicates that he wants to talk to her. He realizes he has to do this. He knows he may have hurt her with his distant behavior throughout the day. He may be wary of her, but he is still very much in love with her. It bothers him that she might have been hurt. On a lighter note, he's very curious about FNB. Her behavior was a little surprising to him. In the back of his mind he's wondering if her behavior means she has feelings for him. Jim decides to take the chance and find out what he can.
As Jim approaches Pam, he's careful to keep his distance. He starts out casually enough with "I though you'd already left." The expression he has on his face is rather interesting. He looks nervous but he's also asking himself why this has to be so difficult. He realizes he has to take his wall down a little bit in order to get the answers he wants. So he steps out on a limb when he says, "I just feel bad. I feel like things were a little weird today." He's being very honest here. He's letting her know that it bothered him that things were awkward. There are however deeper meanings associated with this statement. He's trying to send the message "hey, we need to talk about this." Jim is trying to open up a dialogue about the past to make things a little better for the here and now. He's also telling her that he noticed how different she is. He wants to understand FNB.
On a final, but more personal note, Jim is still deciding if he should pursue things with Karen. He needs to know how Pam feels. He mentioned earlier that he doesn't know where he stands with her. He waits for her to answer, hoping she picked up on the messages he's sent. Pam totally missed it and responds with "What do you mean?" Jim is a little surprised and confused at her response. He's looking at her like, "You didn't feel it?" He totally missed her signal. On the same note, he's perplexed that she didn't pick up on the cues he sent.
However, he's not ready to give up. He digs a little deeper with "I think I should tell you I've sort of starting seeing someone." Jim has multiple motives with this revelation, but none are mean spirited or meant to hurt Pam. He's confused that she won't talk, especially since she was so willing earlier in the day. He doesn't get it that she is frustrated with him. This is his way of prodding her to talk.
On a very innocent level, Jim is again just being honest. He'd rather she find out from him rather than someone else or from simple observation. There is some history between them and he still feels responsible to her. He doesn't want to hurt her. However, the basis of the statement lies primarily with Jim trying to figure out how Pam feels about him. He wants her to give him a reason why he shouldn't pursue a relationship with Karen. The subtext of the statement is "Please tell me where I stand with you." He doesn't understand that she doesn't know either!
Jim didn't just come out and ask her because he learned his lesson in Casino Night. He learned if he totally puts himself on the line, he will get hurt. He's a little more cautious this time. This signifies that he was smart enough to keep his wall partially intact. On a subconscious level, Jim is also probably trying to make Pam a little jealous, but it's important to realize that this is not his primary goal. He knows Pam has a fiery jealous streak, he doesn't want to bring that out at this juncture. Things are already tense enough, there no need to add a jealous fit.
Jim's word choice in his statement is interesting as well. He uses the phrase "sort of," to signify his status. He's letting Pam know that his new relationship is not serious and that he's still here for her if she wants him. The trick being, Pam has to pick up on these cues and she has to tell him straight out how she feels. Her actual response was totally unexpected. She missed every message he sent. She tells him "That's totally cool. You can do whatever you want."
Jim is a little shocked at her answer. He replies "Okay," with the nuance of "I wasn't asking for your permission. That's not what I meant by telling you." He's thrown off that she didn't catch the deeper meaning of his statement. He's also a little hurt that she is so okay with the fact that he's seeing someone. Her response doesn't match her behavior towards him throughout the day. He is completely puzzled.
Pam makes it worse by adding, "We're friends, we'll always be friends." This is the last thing Jim wanted to hear. This has almost the same sting of a rejection. He responds with "Right," which has an interesting tone. It signifies that he is discouraged and has resigned to the perception that this is how she feels. He feels like he put himself out there and was again shot down. Luckily, he had his wall partially in place or this would have been devastating.
He is frustrated that he can't get Pam to talk about the relationship past friendship status. He's confident that he sensed she felt more for him. His "right" is also dripping in guy sarcasm with a double meaning of "you've got to be kidding me." He can't believe she still won't open up to him. He cracks a smile and slightly laughs to himself out of frustration, disbelief, and the fact that he is completely dumbfounded by the situation, "Geez, she still won't talk about it. What else can I do?" Pam seals the deal with her casual "Good to have you back." Jim responds in kind, but he can't shake his confusion and befuddlement with what just transpired.
As he walks away he's still confused and even a little bit hurt that she was so closed off to him. Just before he reaches his car he does a facial shrug, in conjunction with his confused state. He still has no idea where he stands; he's still in limbo. He still can't reconcile her dialogue with her behavior from earlier. Guy sarcasm makes an appearance again as there is a bit of "whatever" in his expression. He is frustrated and she reminded him of why he put his wall up in the first place. His goal of smoothing things over has failed miserably.
Despite the miscues and miscommunication, Jim did get one of his questions answered. This exchange has given him the resolve to pursue a relationship with Karen. Pam has given him a signal that she is not open to him. Karen is someone who wants to be with him, it makes sense for him to go to her. He has to do what is best for him at this stage.
As mentioned in The Pam Dichotomy S3, this conversation is wrought with missed non-verbal cues and confusion. Pam and Jim have lost some of their ability to communicate beyond the spoken word. This leads to massive miscommunication on both ends. Neither understands what the other is trying to say.
- - -
Questions To Ponder:
1. Is Jim's distant behavior understandable? (Are you mad at him?)
2. Did Jim do the right thing by telling Pam he was seeing someone?
3. Should Jim have just asked Pam how she felt instead of relying on innuendo? Should he have told her how he felt? What prevented him from doing so?
4. Should Jim tell Karen about Pam?
5. What will it take to alleviate the communication barriers between Jim and Pam?
6. What will it take for Jim to take down his wall? Is his wall restricted to Pam or will Karen be up against it as well?
- - -
Jim's wall made him very difficult to read. Pam wasn't the only one having problems! I must give snaps to my husband. He helped me a little bit with the last parking lot scene. He was fabulous enough to stop playing his computer game and offer his assistance. He corroborated many of my notes, but he also had some interesting additions. Thank him for the "guy sarcasm" phrase!
Chapter End Notes:
This post was written ten years ago so go easy on me in terms of writing style! I’ve decided not to revise the original posts beyond filling in missing words or fixing wayward punctuation. Call it nostalgia if you will, but there’s something to be said for preserving this little snapshot of fandom.
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
