I have to admit it, they would make a cute couple, Jim thought as he watched Angela sing with Dwight kneeling in front of her. While he was no stranger to odd days and odder office parties, today had left him decidedly unbalanced. Seeing Angela come the closest he’d ever seen her to unwinding had provided a nice distraction after the conversation he’d had with Michael on the couch. Did I really say all that to Michael? Don’t you remember what happened last time you confided to him? It just made things even worse. Is that really all that Karen is to me? A distraction? Does that make me an asshole? Aw crap they’ve got the camera on me again. But now it’s pointing over to the conference...

Jim’s thoughts instantly stopped as he watched Pam open Roy’s present. The sight of her face lighting up with joy and the hug she gave Roy drove an unexpected shard of ice into his heart. Swallowing the lump that had lodged in his throat he returned his attention to Angela’s performance. He kept his face calm even as he could feel the cold travel through him. Looking around his eyes fell on Kevin who was grinning at something on his computer.

Distract yourself, anything is better than thoughts about her, he thought as he made his way to Kevin’s desk. That Jim wasn’t sure which, ‘her’ he was thinking about caused another rock of guilt to drop heavily in his gut.

“Hey Kev!” he called out in greeting. “Got the latest fantasy football stats?”

“You know it!” Kevin quickly clicked off the cat video he’d been laughing at and pulled up the scoresheet for their fantasy football league.

Leaning over Kevin’s chair he lost himself in the world of players, teams, and stats. For all of his seemingly bumbling ways, Kevin had proven himself adept at choosing players. Jim had been having a hard time all due to that fact season. He was almost completely lost in the discussion he’d been having with Kevin until he heard someone speak up across the office.

“Hey Pam!”

As it always had, Roy’s voice calling out to her grated on his nerves in a way Dwight never could. Glancing up he saw Roy talking to Pam with a grin on his face.

Don’t do it man, you’ve moved on. She made her choice, live with it. Despite repeating the mantra that had been going through his mind since last May, he found he couldn’t help but keep an eye on her. By now their voices had faded so he couldn’t overhear their conversation. Pam said something quietly that changed Roy’s demeanor quickly. Where once, he’d been grinning and excited, now Roy’s shoulders were slumped and his face was long. They exchanged a few more words as Roy backed up, before turning away.

Well that’s interesting, he mused. Oh shoot! She’s coming this way! He quickly ducked his head back down to Kevin’s screen. By now, Jim was only halfway paying attention to Kevin. Despite his earlier recital of his mantra, the icy feeling in his chest seemed to have stopped spreading at the very least. He finished up his discussion with Kevin. Looking up, his eyes travelled over the office intent on looking for Karen to spend time with her. Walking over to her desk he saw Stanley standing nearby.

“Have you seen Karen?” Jim asked his fellow salesman.

“She was helping Pam bring the slushy machine down to the parking lot,” intoned the dour man.

“Cool thanks.” Walking away from Stanley, Jim headed through the kitchen to the break room. While the slushy machines were indeed gone, there were still a few cans of soda stacked on one of the tables. Grabbing one at random, Jim sat down heavily in chair. He cracked the tab on his soda and took a long pull. The flavor of the drink caused him to look down at the can. He smirked when he saw the familiar grape logo. The smirk disappeared as a long running argument started up in his mind.

I did miss this in Stamford. I missed a lot of things in Stamford. Oh hell, who am I kidding I missed Pam. How could I not? Careful there buddy, remember, first she broke your heart, then didn’t call you to say she’d called off the wedding, and then basically hung up on you when you called here that one time. But she did want to go out for coffee when you got back. That’s something.

Then again, Karen’s never hid what she’s felt for you. Even when you first got to Stamford and she was basically annoyed at you every day. What changed that? Searching for those chips? Maybe. Weird that after basically loathing you all summer one afternoon could cause such a big change in her.

Pam’s changed too. In good ways. Taking art classes, standing up to Angela, coming up with her own pranks. And where did that sweater come from? Does she know how pretty she is today? Whoa! Steady! You’re with Karen now. You’re not supposed to be thinking about other women like that. But then again Pam’s never been, “another woman.”

He kept arguing with himself until the last of his soda was emptied from the can. There were still a few holiday treats left on the tables. Reaching over to a plate he pulled over the last of the cake pops he’d heard Pam said she’d made. He spun the sprinkled covered confection in his fingers and found himself grinning at the thought of Pam hunched over a bowl of cake ingredients in the kitchen he’d teased her about. The vision effectively killed his mental struggles as he pictured Pam checking her oven temperature with a slight dusting of flour on her cheeks. Glancing up at the clock he saw it was almost time to leave for the day. Setting the cake pop back down he rose from his chair to head back to his desk to start gathering his effects.

Emerging from the kitchen he stopped short as his gaze fell across the office. There she was behind the desk he’d so often leaned across. He paused as the door closed behind him and held her gaze. No, defiantly not just any other woman.

She must have seen something in his eyes because he swore, he saw the corners of her lips curl up. It made the corner of his own mouth rise up in response. I wonder if this is what it was like for her all those years? Holding out for any thread of friendship? She’s done way more than I could have ever done. She’s actually tried to be friends with Karen whereas I did my best to avoid Roy like the plague. Speaking of Karen, where’d she get off too?

He saw his girlfriend in the conference room with a garbage bag in hand. Finally, breaking eye contact with Pam, he walked in to join her and Angela.

“Anything I can do to help?” he offered.

“You can help Karen with the trash,” came Angela’s stiff reply. “Just don’t get any crumbs in the carpet.”

“No problem.” Jim picked up another garbage bag and started tossing used plates and cups inside.

“Hey!” Karen said brightly. “Thanks for coming in to help out.”

Shrugging his shoulders good naturedly, he tossed some more trash in his bag. “Like I said, no problem.”

“Well I’m glad you’re here,” Karen went on. “So anyway, while you were out at lunch I was talking to Ryan and Kelly. They said they knew of a couple great spots we could try out. There’s this one...”

Outwardly Jim put on the appearance he was listening to his girlfriend. He spoke with the appropriate, “yeah’s,” and “sure’s,” but he wasn’t really paying attention to her. Guilt was weighing heavily in his stomach as he worked. I’m not being fair to Pam. To reject her present this morning, but spend all that time in the restaurant messing with Dwight? I’m safe for now, but I’m sure they’ll use that footage. How could they not? I just handed them yet another drama packed episode. ‘Jim Halpert, such a good prankster, he even pranks himself.’ Or better yet, Jim Halpert, douche-bag extraordinaire!’ I mean it’s not like I haven’t pulled anything since I got back. Setting Andy on Pam was pretty funny.

Despite himself, he felt a small grin creep onto his face at the memory. That was one of the best smiles I’ve ever seen from her when she realized it was me. Then when she set him back on me like that? Well done Beesly, well done. Come on man, she’s been working on this for months. How would you have felt if you’d put all this set up into a prank, handed her the keys to it an she said what you did? No, it’s time to stop being afraid of her. It’s Pam. She may not love you, but she’s still your friend and deserves at least that much.

Finishing up clearing the garbage out of the conference room, Jim took the trash bags out to the back hallway where the building cleaning crew would take care of them. By the time he made it back to his desk to put his papers away, most of his co-workers were already heading for the door. He gave Karen a quick good-bye as she walked out with Ryan and Kelly.

Pam was still at her desk as he walked up to retrieve his coat and scarf. “’Night Pam.”

She barely looked up at him. “Night.”

Here goes. “Oh, you know what? I intercepted a transmission earlier, and it seems the CIA is gonna need Dwight down at their headquarters at Langley for training and an ice cream social with the other agents.”

Watching her face morph from one of shock to a beautiful grin cracked the cube of ice in his chest. Without a thought, he was back to his normal pose of leaning over the counter to look at her. He felt the corners of his mouth rise up to match her smile. She is so wonderful.

“We should get him a bus ticket,” she said as she turned back to her computer and pulled up the Greyhound website. To make his trip easier.”

“Oh no, that would be very patriotic.” How do you come up with stuff this great?

She frowned a touch as her search results popped up and looked back up at him, her eyes asking for an answer. “It cost 75 dollars.”

Let’s see, CIA, Jack Ryan, that scene in Hunt for Red October where he’s dropped onto a sub from a helicopter, that’s it! “Hmm. Well maybe the CIA can send a helicopter.”

The sound of her soft laugh and bright smile was infectious. Jim felt a lightness in him, he hadn’t felt in months. He watches as she moved some papers and opened the “Classified” file again. She flipped to one of the pages before setting it on the counter.

“Here’s the number he gave me. I found a web site that taught me how to send anonymous text messages. It’s what I’ve been using to communicate with him.”

With one hand Jim picked up the file and absentmindedly pulled a jelly bean from the dish with the other. His eyes scanned the sheet. Pam had clearly put a lot of effort into this prank. “Wow Beesly! I’m impressed.”

“What do we say?”

Glancing up for a second, he saw her pressing buttons on her phone. Flipping to the next page he saw a map with the location of several military bases marked on it. An orange dot on the map at Atlantic City showed the location of a Coast Guard Air Station. Turning back at the previous page he looked over the code names, cyphers, mission phrases, and other information she’d collected. He couldn’t keep the mischief out of his voice, and what’s more, he found he didn’t want to either.

“How about this. ‘Agent Beets. Prepare for extraction tonight by Coast Guard helo on the roof of your safehouse at 2045. Mandatory training to follow at Langley followed by dessert.’”

“Coast Guard helo?” she asked as she punched in and sent the message before looking back up at him.

“Yeah,” he replied. “Give a, you know, Jack Ryan, kind of feeling.” The lightness he’d felt swelled as he smirked at her.

When she looked back up at him, Jim felt all the fear and doubt he’d ever felt around her melt away. It was just them, Jim and Pam. I screwed up big time. I don’t care what I have to do, I’ve got to get back to her. She’s so beauti...

“I love you.”

Jim’s thoughts came to a screeching halt. Her face was the last thing he saw as an unexpected wave of darkness closed around him.

_____________________________________________________________________________

Pam’s hands shot to her face as Jim fell out of view behind the counter. “Jim! JIM!! Oh my god, Jim!”

She raced around the desk to see him lying on the floor. It didn’t look like he’d hit his head on anything. Kneeling next to him she lightly started patting his cheek. “Jim! Come on! Wake up!”

Looking around Pam saw only two cameramen from the doc crew were still around. To their credit, they’d both put their cameras down. One was already pulling his phone out to call 911. The other knelt down and helped Pam to straighten Jim’s limp form out on the carpet.

The cameraman looked up at Pam when they were done. “Do you think you could go find a pillow or something? Also, if there’s any family or the like that needs to be called, maybe find his emergency contact sheet?”

Pam stood back up and reached for her coat. “Here, use this,” she said as she handed it over. Crossing back behind her desk she pulled out her company directory and turned to Jim’s page. The information on it almost caused her to faint as well. She’d known that Jim’s sister, Larissa, was his primary emergency contact. However, seeing her own name and information in the number two spot caused her knees to go weak and she sat down in her chair.

Checking the date on the “Last Updated” line showed he’d last filled it out after his return from Stamford. He still put me there, even though he’s got a girlfriend. What do I say to that?

“The ambulance should be here in a couple minutes,” the doc crew member announced. “I’m going to head downstairs to lead them in here. The 911 dispatcher said to keep him still and not move him around.”

Pam nodded at him as he walked out of the office. Gathering her strength, she walked back to kneel down next to Jim. As gently as she could she wrapped her hand around his. Please be alright Jim!

_____________________________________________________________________________

The words started out blurry and soft but grew louder and clearer. The blackness in his vision was also slowly starting to clear away.

“Come on back man. There you go.”

Blinking Jim tried to sit up as he responded to the voice. “What’s going on?”

A firm hand on his shoulder stopped him from rising further. “Hold on a second. My name’s Steve. I’m a paramedic. Try not to move. I’ve got a few questions to ask. How’s your breathing doing?”

Jim took a deep breath. “Fine.”

“Does anything hurt right now?”

Focusing his eyes on the medic kneeling at his side Jim took a second to see if anything was in pain. “No.”

“Do you feel dizzy at all?”

“No.”

“Lightheaded like you’re about to pass out again?”

“No.”

“Any nausea, vomiting, or diarrhea?”

“No to all three.”

“Any recent injuries?”

“No.”

Steve had pulled a small pad of paper out of the front shirt pocket on his uniform and was making notes on it while he’d been questioning Jim. During the pause Jim looked around. Another paramedic was busy wrapping a blood pressure cuff around his arm. Two of the doc crew members were standing in front of Michael’s office. However, it was the person holding his free hand that commanded his attention the most. Pam was kneeling next to him with an expression of fear, hope, and dare he say love, while lightly grasping his hand. It was the most gorgeous sight he’d ever laid eyes on. Smiling at her, he squeezed her hand harder before giving his attention back to the paramedic.

“What’s the last thing you remember before you passed out?”

Jim looked back at Pam. It looked like fear was starting to creep back into her eyes. No, not again. Not ever again. “A beautiful woman told me she loved me for the first time.”

Both Steve the paramedic and Pam let out little gasps of half laughter. Jim turned to face her and saw hope shining in her eyes. She’d sucked her lips slightly inside her mouth in an expression Jim knew was one she used to stop herself from crying. Her hand squeezed his harder to which he responded in kind.

Steve looked back at his partner who had a smile on his face and doing his best to not break out in laughter. “Okay then,” Steve replied. “Um, since you did pass out it’s our protocol to take a quick picture of your heart. I’ve got a bunch of stickers to go on your arms and legs, and then on your upper chest and around the left side of your torso.”

Steve looked up at the doc crew members and also at Pam. “Mind giving us some space. I will need to lift up his shirt for this.”

“No problem,” said one of the cameramen. He nodded at his partner. They grabbed their cameras and made their way to the small closet where the documentary equipment was stored and left the office.

“Pam can stay,” Jim told Steve as the cameramen left.

“If you say so,” Steve replied. “Go ahead and lift up your shirt for me.”

Reluctantly Jim took his hand from Pam’s and unbuttoned his work shirt before lifting up the white t-shirt underneath. Steve first put stickers with wires attached to them on Jim’s deltoids and then down by his ankles. “All good?” Jim asked.

“Yeah, but I think I need to shave off some of your chest hair,” Steve said while reaching in his med bag for a razor. “Don’t worry, it’ll grow back soon.”

At first Jim watched Steve as he trimmed some hair near the upper part of the middle of his chest and then in four more spots around his left nipple. Looking to his right he saw Pam’s gaze was intently focused on his chest.

“Hey Beesly,” he said with a smirk. “My eyes are up here!”

The joke got a laugh out of the two medics. Pam however jumped a bit at the comment. Immediately Jim saw her eyes grow wide and her face flush scarlet. He couldn’t resist another light jab.

“Wow Pam! It’s amazing! Your face is as red as your sweater!”

He couldn’t stop the grin that formed on his face as she looked back at him with a tight-lipped half-grimace half-smile that reminded him of when she’d figured out he’d used Andy to prank her.

“Your ass is about to be red from me kicking it so hard if you don’t shut it,” she warned.

“Sorry to interrupt, but I need you to hold still for a moment,” Steve interjected.

Jim just kept his smirk and eyes trained on Pam. He knew she’d been scared, but more and more he saw hope and playfulness fill her eyes. The sight did much to continue warming his heart.

“Okay, you can move again,” Steve told him as a piece of paper came out of the small printer on the bottom of his heart monitor. Jim looked over at the printout. To his untrained eye there were a dozen individual squiggly lines in four columns on the small paper. However, to Steve it must have meant something. The medic turned back to Jim after he looked over the electrocardiogram printout. “Good news is, there’s no sign of a heart attack.”

Jim nodded. “Great. Can I sit up now?”

“Sure,” Steve replied. Reaching over Steve helped Jim into a sitting position.

“What is that?” Jim pointed to the printout Steve was folding up to put in a pocket.

“It’s called a 12-lead ECG. I’ll spare you the lecture on cardiology, but those wires I put on you allow me to look at your heart from a variety of angles. By comparing some of them I can tell if you’re having a heart attack or not, which could have been a reason why you passed out. Like I said, there’s nothing that looks like that.”

Jim adopted a somewhat pensive look. “So, what you’re saying is that I don’t have a broken heart?”

Steve glanced back at his partner who threw up his hands and gave a ‘your own your own’ type of gesture. “Uhh, sure.”

“Could I have a copy of that?” Jim asked.

“Sure,” Steve repeated. After fiddling with the controls of his cardiac monitor he gave Jim a copy of the 12-lead ECG. “Since you did pass out, I do have to recommend we take you to the hospital.”

Jim pulled a face at that. “I don’t think that’s needed. I’m feeling better than I have in months.”

“If you say so,” Steve was pulling his small notepad out again. “A few more quick questions, then I’ll have you sign a few papers and we’ll be out of your hair.”

“Shoot.”

“Are you allergic to any medications?”

“Not that I know of.”

“Take any prescriptions every day?”

“Nope.”

“Any major medical conditions? High blood pressure? Stroke? Seizure? Diabetes? Things like that?”

“None.”

Steve also asked Jim for his full name, birthday, and address. He then unhooked Jim from his cardiac monitor. Finally, Steve had Jim sign two forms. One allowing the ambulance company to bill his insurance and another stating that Jim was refusing to be transported. After Pam signed as a witness the two paramedics packed up their equipment and left.

Pam put hand under Jim’s arm and helped him to his feet. “Don’t you ever do that to me again!” She swatted his arm lightly for good measure.

Jim had the good sense to laugh. “Easy Beesly! I’m a recovering heart patient.”

“Yeah sure,” she said with a hint of sarcasm as she started to re-button his dress shirt.

Reaching up Jim covered her hands with his. He waited until she looked back up at him. “Did you mean it?”

He felt his pulse start to speed up. Looking down at her, he watched as she swallowed a couple times and looked back at his chest. Finally, she tilted her head back up and met his gaze. He saw a new look of conviction in her eyes.

“Yes, Jim. I meant it. I’m in love with you.”

There was nothing else he could say. He paused for a beat to look into her eyes again. When he saw her loving expression there was only one thing to do. He wrapped his arms around her and tilted his head down. As his lips covered hers, he felt her stiffen in surprise, but that didn’t last long. At once her own arms wrapped around him as she returned his kiss with equal fervor.

How long they stayed wrapped up with each other, Jim couldn’t tell. All he knew was that he intended to enjoy every second of kissing Pam. That was until a loud voice shattered the silence of the office.

“Hey, I just saw an ambulance pull out of here...Pam! HALPERT! WHAT THE HELL!!”

Breaking from Pam, Jim turned to the doors from where the voice had come from. At that moment only one thing registered. Roy looked pissed.