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Author's Chapter Notes:

I want to thank everyone who's left me reviews. I can't begin to tell you how much they mean to me! I'm sorry that this has taken so long. I blame spring semester starting back up.

 

Also, this went AU after A Benihana Christmas, so nothing from Traveling Salesman or The Return.

The air in the car was stiff and it choked her and she knew she needed to say something. She glanced over at him and could see white knuckles gripping the steering wheel.

 

She couldn't decide if she felt comforted that he seemed just as on edge.

 

She took a deep breath and opened her mouth, still unsure what she was going to say. "Jim."

 

He cut her off immediately. "How's your ankle?"

 

She sighed. How do you tell someone that the pounding in a very possibly broken bone is just a twinge compared to the ache you feel for what you've done? You lie, she guessed. "It's okay." She took a deep breath and tried again. "Jim."

 

He shook his head quickly and looked at her for the first time since he'd gently set her on the seat. "Don't."

 

She dropped her gaze to her lap. She knew she had very little right to bring up the subject. After all, this was her mess.

 

"Just..." Jim started softly. "Later." He glanced over again and tentatively met her eyes.

 

Pam nodded slowly, trying to find a way for her eyes to convey 'I'm so sorry. Please give me another chance' before he looked back to the road.

 

They pulled up in front of Mercy Hospital five minutes later. Pam couldn't decide whether she was relieved or upset to see that there was a wheel chair sitting by the building which Jim grabbed and brought over to her door.

 

He wheeled her through the doors and with some direction and forms from the admitting staff, they were seated in the waiting room. Pam had started filling out forms when she suddenly gasped and looked up. "Oh, no."

 

"What? What's wrong?"

 

"I don't... I left all of my things at the office. My wallet, my insurance card, my ID..."

 

She was getting more and more worked up as she spoke and Jim placed his hand on her arm to calm her. She froze at the contact and he pulled back, clearing his throat. He spoke softly, still trying to calm her down. "It's not a big deal, Pam. I'll call the office and have someone drive your purse over. Okay?"

 

Pam seemed to calm down at that and he pulled out his cell phone.

 

"Dunder Mifflin, this is Ryan." Thank God, Jim thought to himself. He'd known that anyone else would have asked questions, which was not something he could deal with at the moment.

 

"Ryan, it's Jim. Listen, I need someone to drive Pam's purse over here. She needs her insurance information and ID."

 

"Uh huh, sure." Jim could hear the disinterest in Ryan's voice. "Got it. I'll send someone over."

 

"Thanks, man." He hung up the phone and turned back to Pam.

 

She smiled weakly at him, a little embarrassed at her near panic attack. "Thank you."

 

"Beesly?"

 

Jim stood and wheeled Pam to the nurse who'd just called her name. She took the handles from him and let him know that he'd have to wait in the waiting room. Jim nodded and met Pam's eyes. "I'll just be..." he motioned over his shoulder at the chairs, "I'll be waiting."

 

Jim sat back down as Pam was wheeled away. He felt all the tension leave his body at once as he realized that he was away from prying eyes for the first time that day. He sank lower into his chair and let his head fall into his hands. The whole day hit him at once. He had tried not to think about the ramifications of the previous night. What it meant for him and Karen, what it meant for the way he was treated in the office, what it meant for him and Pam. But now, finally allowing himself to be in the moment, he was petrified by the inevitable change that was coming. He just wished he knew which way that change would go.

 

He sensed a person standing above him and then a purse dangled in front of him. He hadn't expected the arm holding it to be attached to Karen.

 

"Here," she said as she sat beside him.

 

"Thanks," he said quietly. He looked back down to his hands. The silence stretched out between them as he tried to think of the proper thing to say in this situation. Was there a correct way to apologize for not telling your girlfriend that you're in love with someone else before she finds out on TV?

 

Luckily, Karen spoke first, relieving Jim from having to answer his own thoughts. "I'm sorry," she said softly.

 

Jim almost burst out laughing. "What do you possibly have to be sorry for?"

 

Karen took a deep breath and turned to him. "I'm sorry that you've been having such a rough time. I know that I haven't been helping matters. Especially lately."

 

"Karen..."

 

Karen put a hand up and Jim looked back down at his hands. "No, just listen. I'm not going to pretend I'm not at least a little angry. I really wish I'd known everything before I moved here. But I think I have some understanding of why you couldn't tell me."

 

"Karen, I never meant to hurt you," Jim said, realizing how much he meant it. "I never meant for this to happen."

 

"I know you didn't," she replied with a soft smile.

 

"This doesn't have to be..." he trailed off as he searched for the words. "We don't have to be over."

 

Karen laughed softly and placed her hand on his forearm. "Yeah. We do. Jim, it wouldn't be fair to either one of us." She looked up at him pointedly. "Or to anyone else, for that matter."

 

Jim hung his head, refusing to acknowledge her meaning. Karen paused for a moment, trying to decide whether or not to continue. "Jim, I hate to jump in here, but someone has to tell you this."

 

Jim stared downward, his gaze fixed at a stain on the ground. He had to remind himself to breathe as he waited with a sense of dread at what Karen wanted to tell him.

 

"You get that she was lying, don't you?"

 

Jim shook his head, and looked back up at her. "Karen, please don't."

 

Karen met his gaze and continued on. "You didn't misinterpret anything."

 

As the words registered with him, Karen could see his eyes well in a manner which was eerily similar way what she had watched the night before. She could see it in his face that he was back in the moment, back to that night. She realized with some relief that her heart ached for to see him in so much pain more than she ached for him. As she leaned in to kiss his cheek, she was amazed at how alright she was with pushing her supposed boyfriend to another woman. Before she pulled away she whispered in his ear, "It's going to be okay. Hang in there."

 

With that she gathered her own purse and stood to leave. She stopped when she reached the door and turned back to him. "Oh, I forgot to tell you. Michael's locked himself in his office because he feels so guilty for what happened. He told me to tell you that you both have the rest of the day off."


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