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Author's Chapter Notes:
This is it, last chapter. Thank you all so much for reading!

Jim sat, his attention fixed on the stained floor. No one who knew them, who had seen them together on any regular basis, had ever speculated on Pam's feelings for him. Karen's words had been a catalyst to bringing back up the hope that he'd spent the majority of the last year pushing down. When he'd moved to Stamford, he'd forced himself to give up the idea that things would ever work between Pam and him. So while he'd never been able to stop loving her, he'd been able to stop himself from thinking she could love him. He'd stopped thinking that her actions could be mistaken for any interest in him.

 

But for Karen to tell him that he'd been right all along? He assumed that she was the last person who would want that to be true. That gave her words have a little more weight.

 

As he'd sat there, he'd gone back over the past year in his head. He'd thought about all of the things that had happened between them since he'd come back to Scranton. He thought about her hug that first day, and how she'd asked him out to coffee. He thought about how he'd thought he'd seen a flicker of shock and sadness cross her face before the mask slid into place and she told him that they'd always be friends. He thought about seeing that mask again when he'd rejected her Christmas gift. And he thought about the way she smiled at him when he'd come back for it.

 

It was in that moment that he realized that a prank over new responsibility had meant the same to her as a teapot over an iPod had to him.

 

And then Jim realized that he recognized that mask. The same mask he saw on Pam's face as he glanced back at her while Karen rubbed her hand along his back, the mask that slipped over her face when he sat next to Karen in the conference room…

 

The mask he had worn when Roy came around.

 

By the time this revelation hit him, nearly two and a half hours had gone by and Pam was hobbling out of the Emergency Room doors on crutches and her ankle in an air cast.

 

Jim scrambled up and over to meet her at the front desk, bringing her purse with him.

 

"Are you okay?" he asked, handing her things over to her.

 

She nodded, getting out her wallet and passing over her insurance and identification. She turned back to Jim. "Sprained, they said. It's pretty swollen, but should heal on its own. I've just got to stay off of it for a few days."

 

He nodded, not trusting what might come out of his mouth after his very recent thoughts. Once Pam's things were given back, they were sent on their way.

 

The car ride to Pam's apartment was just as quiet as the one to the hospital. Jim spent the trip still trying to keep his mouth shut while Pam sat trying to think of something, anything to say.

 

"Oh, who should I thank for bringing my purse?"

 

Jim was silent for a moment. "Um, Karen, actually."

 

Pam looked over at him, not having expected that answer. "That was really nice of her." She paused for a moment and took a deep breath. "She's really great, Jim."

 

Jim nodded slowly, staring straight ahead at the road. "Yeah…"

 

The car was silent for another moment before Jim spoke again, still staring at the road. "That's, uh… I actually think that's over. Me and Karen, I mean."

 

Pam froze, unsure of how to respond. He didn't sound particularly upset. It sounded more like he was just relaying information. "Oh. I'm sorry," she said softly.

 

Jim still faced the road, willing the car to be at its destination already. He only nodded in response.

 

When they finally did arrive, Jim helped Pam with her things as she maneuvered on the crutches up and into her apartment. As he set down her things, Jim took off his coat and placed it over a chair. He turned back and suddenly it was just the two of them without any distractions.

 

Pam glanced around nervously. "Jim, you don't have to… I mean, I think I'm okay. You don't have to stay here…" she trailed off and looked back down to the ground.

 

For the first time in almost a year, Jim let himself interpret the tone of her voice. I don't want you to go, it told him. "I want to stay," he responded quickly, then adding, "If that's okay," as almost an afterthought.

 

He was rewarded for his bravery with a small smile from Pam. She nodded. "Of course." With that she turned and walked into the kitchen. "Would you like some tea?" she asked, over her shoulder.

 

"Yes, please."

 

Jim followed her into the kitchen and found her standing, sans crutches, in the corner of the counter. He stopped only a foot behind her, willing his heart to slow down and move out of his throat. This is it, he thought. With one more deep breath he decided to dive in.

 

"If you could change anything about that night, would you?"

 

He saw her tense and freeze, then take a deep breath.

 

When she finally turned to face him, she was eye level with his chest. Her gaze remained there as she started speaking. "Please listen to everything I have to say before you react." She paused for a moment and collected herself. "I will never forgive myself for how horrible I was to you. You were so…" she shook her head. "And the worst part is that I knew exactly what I was doing." She paused and shut her eyes for a moment before squaring her shoulders and starting again.

 

"But, Jim, you've got to understand this. I was stuck with the same idea of what my future had to be for 10 years. That night… You were what it took for me to realize how unhappy I was and would have been with Roy. I needed that. Desperately.

 

"So I guess I don't know if I would have changed it all. I wish so much that you hadn't gotten hurt; you've got to know that. But I can't imagine what would have happened if you hadn’t…" She stopped talking and placed her hands on his chest. Finally she looked up and met his eyes, feeling tears come to her eyes as she saw the same in his.

 

"There is one thing I would change. Regardless of what I did say that night, I was screaming one thing in my head the whole time. Jim, I should have told you that I loved you, too." She placed her hands on his cheeks and used her thumb to wipe away a tear that had fallen. "That I'm in love with you."

 

Her words hung like anticipation in the air. Neither moved as they stared at each other; his arms at his side and her hands holding his face.

 

He swallowed quickly and when he spoke his voice was low and heavy. "Can I react now?"

 

Her response came as a whisper. "Please."

 

He wrapped his arms around her waist and brought her lips to his. She felt tears spill over her eyes in relief as they came together. His mouth opened and hers followed suit and she swore that the room was spinning.

 

When they finally broke apart, she wrapped her arms around his neck, holding him close.

 

"That's what you'd change, huh?" he whispered in her ear. She was glad he was holding her so tight, because she was sure that she would have lost the ability to stand upright when she more felt than heard him.

 

She murmured her affirmative response into space behind his ear and felt him shudder in her arms.

 

After taking a moment, and a deep breath, to recover, he whispered again. "Then I propose a do-over."

 

She laughed with her whole body for what seemed like the first time in months. "A do-over?"

 

He pulled back and released her with a smirk on his face. "Take two?"

 

She nodded and smiled.

 

"I'm in love with you."

 

She tried to keep herself from crying all over again. "That's probably a good thing, since I'm in love with you."

 

"You are, huh?"

 

"Oh yeah."

 

He smiled and pulled her back into him. "Good answer."

Chapter End Notes:

The end.

 

Quick note about the title -- This whole time I've had mixed feelings for the title. Taken out of context it just seems almost too cutesy. Makes much more sense and seems to fit better when with the entire song. It's from Tegan and Sara's "Where Does The Good Go". Very good song. Just wanted to point that out for my own sanity.

 

Thanks again for reading!!



SixFlightsUp is the author of 2 other stories.
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