MEMBER'S CHOICE - The Jim and Pam saga affects more than just those two. Sometimes it's hard to sit by and be a mother while those two dance around the subject.
New Chapter added - more Jim/Pam holiday fluffiness. :-)
10 Wow. You know, on the Jim thread (at TWoP), there's been a lot of discussion about how little we know about Jim, and I tell you, you've very realistically filled in the blanks here. I can completely see him as a middle child between two overachieving siblings (BTW: Jonathan - yay!), with a father who pushes him, a mother who really understands him well. This is one of those fics that I wish GD and Co. would just make happen on the show.
As always, this is just terrific, Moxie - can't wait for your updates!
Thanks so much - you are too kind! I do remember reading the Jim thread and I agree completely - it would be a little easier if they just filled in a FEW details, wouldn't it? That's the one thing I did like about LOST - the flashbacks that gave the character more depth. We seriously need those. ;-)
10 Mm, so painful - nothing like the combination of Toby and Jim. ....Except for the combo of Jim and Sasha! This was alternately adorable and devastating, so realistic. Loved it that he's exhausted all the time except for when he's trying to go to sleep - been there. And I also love it that Sasha questions him about Karen - because kids are incapable of the kind of denial in which he and Pam regularly indulge; they just call it like they see it.
Maybe Sasha could be their fairy godchild.... :o)
Great job with this chapter!
10 You know, you've really hit on something fascinating here: the fact that Karen would find it hard not to get a little clingy with Jim because he's such a nice guy and wouldn't be an ass about it. Ouch. Such a realistic complication.
Loving this!
10 Man, you are so good at capturing the characters' individual voices, which is really a difficult thing to do. This just illuminated so much about where Toby must be mentally, emotionally - lonely but wary; eager but still hesitant.
Please continue this - I'd love to read your take on all the characters, seriously!
6 Wow, ladama - I can't believe this is your first fic! (And I should warn you - writing them is addictive; so no, this probably won't be your last.) :o)
I like the way you present Jim's internal conflict here - wanting to move on with Karen, but ultimately finding himself unable to let go of thoughts of Pam. Because I think that's exactly what's happening on the show right now, only (unfortunately) we don't get to be privvy to his thoughts.
This:
"Karen had said something earlier about a self-performed lobotomy and Jim was starting to think it wasn’t a bad idea. Maybe then he would be able to look at Karen and not think about anyone else."
...was just...guh. Very nice, very nice. :o)
One note: You've got several comma splices here (which may be an artistic thing), but I just thought I'd mention that, as 1) some readers are very easily put off by grammatical errors and 2) it's my job (I'm an English teacher.) :O)
But again - what a great job on this! You should definitely, definitely keep writing; I'd love to read more of your stuff!
Thank you very much for my first review. I have a feeling there will be many more hours of fanfic writing. I already have a couple more ideas floating around in my head.
I'm really happy you liked the lobotomy reference. I wasn't sure how I was going to finish that scene, but then had an "a-ha!" moment when I remembered Karen and the corkscrew in the episode.
Thanks for the comma-splice note. I seem to hit that comma key whenever I finished any kind of thought, so this certainly isn't the first thing I've written that has ended up with gratuitous comma use. I'm certainly going to look out for it now (I feel like I'm already looking out for it in just writing this comment :-) )
Oh wow - just wow. Once again, a brilliant setup. I totally did not see the cheating question coming, so it absolutely took my breath away. Wow. Deep breath. I'm seriously getting upset that I've only got a few chapters left to read.
Okay, I would give anything to get a talking head from Jim - following a party he attended at Pam's (or even just a party he went to that she also attended) - with him saying, "She and I...well, I'm sure you can figure it out."
I think that'd be an excellent way for the writers to let us know that finally, all is well. ;o)
Excellent job on this - I really hate to see it end.
10 Ahhh...so nice and hot and sweet and perfect. Thank you. :o)
10 Ahhh! You write sexual tension like no one else - this is so perfect, so understated and so them.
Author's Response: Thanks girl7, I'm really glad you said that because a lot of times I get impatient and just want them to jump each others bones already. But I love to read sexual tension, it just makes everything so much sweeter, so that's why enjoy writing it so much.
10 God, what a beautiful, sexy chapter. When she walked in the room and closed the door behind her, I swear I stopped breathing.
Author's Response: Thanks! I wasn't sure if Pam really would do something like that, or if she'd be like "Gah! What are you doing in here?" But I think by that moment, after everything that's been building up between them, she'd be willing to spend any minute alone with Jim that she could!
My god, you are so good at the cliff hangers (among other things). You capture the inevitable awkwardness/angst between Jim and Karen really well here - and I particularly love the understated way you've written Karen. Bravo!
Next chapter...
Guh. Brilliant, engaging, fascinating...must get to the next chapter!
10 "Shabby replacement, no. Rebound chick is open to interpretation though."
Oh god, that's a hilarious line, and I can so hear him saying it, trying to diffuse the tension. And guh, that last line is just so gut-wrenching, the simple, "yes."
Mmmkay...next chapter?
I'm glad you thought it was funny because I wasn't sure if breaking the tension was such a good thing to do there. But oh, well. Next chapter should be up tonight!
All right, I've got this sustained inward squee thing going on at the tension you're building here! This is a delicious, delicious set up! ....And I swear to god, if this is the last chapter, I will kill myself! [/Kelly]
I should get a ribbon for taking the time to review this instead of tearing into the next chapter. Wow. Such a realistically painful glimpse into Jim's psyche here. Love the metaphor of his first time as average, thus (maybe) setting the tone for his life. And poor Karen - though I could completely see her not ever pushing things with him, ever, and that's why she's a good rebound for him.
Okay (gulp), about this New Year's Eve party with Pam....
Hee, the whole Kelly exchange was so dead on that it made me laugh out loud. I'm really feeling Jim's pain here - eeee.
This is so great!
Ahh, you wrote the awkward Roy/Pam conversation so well that I could actually see it happening - and your talking heads were spot-on as well. And this? "Besides, how bad could one night be, right? "
...I could so see that being one of Jim's infamous dramatic irony/foreshadowing tinged talking heads. Sigh. This is such a great story!
Brilliant, brilliant twist with Karen seeing the yearbook photo - ahhh! And your line about the chiffon dress feeling soft in her fingers "just like his hair had"...guh. This is awesome!
First: The line about Jim wanting so badly to make a joke about Karen's boots made me laugh right out loud. That said, I read the rest of the story holding my breath, dying for him to come face-to-face with Pam. Ahh me. Now if only she'll take off that pesky sweater....
10 So good. [/Jim] This ranks right up there with "Booze Cruise" on the frustration meter - I was so dying for him to kiss her!!!!!!!
So was Pam!
Jesus, 69c.o.n., you're killing me here with these mini-cliffhangers! You've written such a believable dynamic here between Pam and Karen - especially Pam's discomfort at the fact that she genuinely likes Karen. And I love the last several lines.
On to the next chapter!
Jim receives a gift the day after Christmas. And then another one the next day. And again for the 10 days after. Is it a joke, or has his True Love come forward? 10 Ah, moxie - the best! The kissing and the stubble and the banter and just....sigh. This was absolutely awesome. Next installment....???
EEEEEE! So I know I'm late to the party, but seriously --- Pam knows Parma!?! I was even excited to read that Kelly knows Parma - what a great universe you've created here!
And you are the reigning queen of delivering just enough happy stuff to tide the reader over, while leaving the perfect amount of mystery to make one want to be selfish and skip to the next chapter without a review.
What...?
Shoosh. Wow. *fanning self* What can I say? Loved the way the chapter began with the break room banter, loved the way it ended, with the totally unexpected (yet hot *cough*) phone sex. Wow.
Wow. ;oD
Guh. You and your damned steamy chapters reduce me to utter...blathering when it comes to reviews. Seriously.
Okay - love the banter; love the anticipation. Your description of the work day and their plans actually reminded me of my early days with Mr. Girl7, which is a testament to how well you capture that early giddiness when it's all new.
And uh, yeah, shower scene, then after dinner.... I hosted and attended many a slumber party as girl, but I don't remember one ever being like this. :o)
All right, next chapter!