Penname: darjeelingandcoke Real name: Joe
Member Since: October 01, 2011

Bio:

Just a guy with Jim and Pam on the brain, trying to get the song out of his head by singing it.

Author of the Month June 2021


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Reviews by darjeelingandcoke
The Third Planet from Altair by ThePinkButterfly Rated: MA [Reviews - 100] 46
Summary: Feature

Sometime in the distant future, the UN intercepts a message from a planet sixteen lightyears away. You, Dr. Jim Halpert, are one of the world’s leading anthropologists, specializing in interspecies communication. You have been chosen to make the journey to the source of the message, the third planet from the star Altair. Along with you are captain and veteran astronaut Michael Scott, engineer and astronaut Dwight Schrute, and cosmologist Dr. Pam Beesly. With ten possible endings, choose your own story as you travel through the galaxy, and maybe find love along the way. Inspired by a Choose Your Own Adventure™ children’s book of the same name by Edward Packard.


Categories: Jim and Pam, Alternate Universe
Characters: Dwight, Jim, Jim/Pam, Michael, Pam
Genres: Angst, Fluff, Romance, Steamy, Suspense, Travel
Warnings: Adult language, Explicit sexual content, Major Character Death, Violence/Injury
Series: Adventure is Out There!
Chapters: 33 Table of Contents
Completed: Yes Word count: 82227 Read Count: 7246 ePub Downloads: 5
[Report This] Published: August 04, 2021 Updated: August 04, 2021
Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed
Date: September 05, 2021 Title: Chapter 27: Chapter 27

“Dammit Jim, I’m a doctor.” LOLLLLLLLL.

"I understand lucky guesses. I couldn’t understand anything you explained to me about where we needed to look for Jim.” DOUBLE LOL. Love the dialogue in this chapter.

AND YOU REPURPOSED THE DIALOGUE FROM THE JOB. Awesome.

Still wish I had just brought Pam. (5)

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed
Date: September 05, 2021 Title: Chapter 28: Chapter 28

I *thought* those cave drawings might be of what they could observe of our solar system!

"Pam ends up falling asleep on your shoulder about two hours in. So, you know. Not a bad flight." Oh, I see you.

THEY WENT TO BENIHANA AND SANG KARAOKE. Lot of good reference work in this chapter. Not a great first date for Jim and Pam, but those crazy kids worked it out in the end. Actually kind of a sweet gesture to get Dwight out of the way... he did some good work on this expedition, he deserves the hike to Mordor. And their first kiss! SO SWEET. And the callback to the cosmology/cosmetology joke!

Okay. This ending is DELIGHTFULLY smuffy.


Well. I'm glad Jim and Pam fell in love, because I feel like Dwight did most of the scientific heavy-lifting on this particular journey. Although I guess Jim did still observe the giant underwater creatures on the water moon, that's pretty cool. Either way... I think my next step is to bring Pam to the water moon. (5)

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed
Date: September 05, 2021 Title: Chapter 21: Chapter 21

Or, and hear me out on this: maybe the mistake was exploring the water moon in the first place. Seems very clear The Third Planet is really where the action is. Ugh. Well. I feel committed to this course of action now, too soon to bail on it. (6)

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed
Date: September 05, 2021 Title: Chapter 22: Chapter 22

I get that it's not first contact, but finding trees on another world is still a pretty big deal. So maybe the water moon was the right choice after all. Maybe. Buck up, Jim.

Oh, the anti-matter storm that kept causing problems earlier. Great. Awesome. Well chosen, Jim. (6)

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed
Date: September 05, 2021 Title: Chapter 7: Chapter 7

HA. *DWIGHT* gets stuck with the water moon! SUCKAAAAAAAAAA.

Again, the similarity of Altair's third planet and our own (between the environment and even the creatures) really makes me wonder about the connections between humanity and these aliens and how deep they run.

Look, I get that this is a scary situation, but could you please take five seconds to marvel about having discovered LIFE ON OTHER PLANETS! And not just life, but sentient life! And then possibly sentient PLANT life! Come on, man. *grumbles*

Look, this is a romance. I get it. It's JAM fanfic. But gosh darn it I want to explore a new planet and find more aliens! (7)

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed
Date: September 05, 2021 Title: Chapter 14: Chapter 14

These *are* fascinating creatures. I'm glad we got to observe them. (Honestly, they're gonna need to send another expedition back here with some biologists and animal behavior specialists who can better document this stuff.)

You know, I didn't see this accident coming, but honestly the moment Michael started talking about how easy the Cygnets were to fly, I should have known disaster was going to happen somewhere down on the timeline.

So. Feels like maybe we should try the intended emergency plan before getting creative. (7)

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed
Date: September 05, 2021 Title: Chapter 18: Chapter 18

You know what? I would not be a good interstellar explorer. (Although *I* might have put in a few more hours in the simulator learning how to fly the Cygnet, JIM.)

Okay, so. Not in a good situation with physical health. But we're now about to make contact with semi-humanoid creatures on another planet. So we've got that going for us! Let's hope Jim's prairie dog experience comes in handy... (7)

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed
Date: September 05, 2021 Title: Chapter 19: Chapter 19

Hmmm. There's a LOT of commonalities between these two very different species that allow them to make even these basic communications. Like, it feels like they're having about as easy a time as they would with another kind of primate. That's pretty fascinating. Really lucky for Jim and Pam, but also feels telling of a broader mystery to solve.

'“You don’t want to live out a centuries-old fanfiction trope?” she asks, her twitching smile working against her deadpan delivery.' BEESLY.

I wonder what the aliens DO make of all of this? They're probably studying Pam and Jim in their own way... (7)

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed
Date: September 05, 2021 Title: Chapter 20: Chapter 20

How is it that you managed to turn Jim and Pam being stranded forever as housepets to aliens into fluff? (7)

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed
Date: September 05, 2021 Title: Chapter 8: Chapter 8

Okay, well. This... probably can't end worse than being stranded as alien housepets forever.

Okay, so the antimatter storm seems to be one of the big pivot points across all timelines... and apparently being in touch with Dwight is life-saving. Which, you know. Duh.

Tough on Pam. But this feels like it's mainly just a consequence of the dangers and unpredictability of interstellar travel, rather than being on a mistake anyone made. Including anyone making decisions on Jim's behalf, by the way. And I suppose Pam might be comforted to know that in a world where she wasn't there, Jim also managed to accomplish little to nothing.

It looks like Pam *is* making the most valuable contribution she could - the insufficient protection against antimatter storms was a problem from the beginning, and clearly needs to be corrected if they intended to accomplish anything out there.

Ugh. This is heartbreaking. Both with Pam's sense of her own failures and with Jim's sense of loss, both of Pam and his sense of importance to Pam. (8)

(8)

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed
Date: September 05, 2021 Title: Chapter 9: Chapter 9

Rough times for Jim. Not much time left on this planet and he can't even reap all the joy out of it he should. Poor guy.

WHOA. TWIST. A lovely kiss between Jim and Pam here... and of course Michael interrupts it. *grumbles* Would have loved to hear more of what happened since the end of the mission that turned things around for Pam, her Space!Season 3, but I'm glad these crazy kids are going to have each other on their next adventure. (8)

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed
Date: September 05, 2021 Title: Chapter 13: Chapter 13

Hey! I've been here before... (9)

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed
Date: September 05, 2021 Title: Chapter 15: Chapter 15

Okay, well. Since playing it according to procedure accomplished nothing, I guess it's time we get creative. *cracks knuckles*

This damn antimatter storm really screws us up whichever way we turn, doesn't it? *sigh* So I guess it didn't necessarily matter which decision we made about the jetpacks, at least for Jim and Pam's sake. And maybe even for Dwight and Michael's.

I do think that *eventually* they might send someone else to track down the signals? But I guess there's not much hope of actual rescue.

“That being said, I forgot to bring enough razors for a lifetime away from home. So, I’m adjusting to that.” Oh, Dwight. This is the rare scenario where you might want Dwight in your corner.

Okay, ow? Did you have to make Booze Cruise somehow more painful? "Booze Cruise, except they're stranded on an alien planet FOREVER." (10)

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed
Date: September 05, 2021 Title: Chapter 16: Chapter 16

Hmmmm. You know, if they ARE ever found, they're going to have a lot of cool discoveries to share about their discoveries on other planets.

Ooooof. It really does raise the stakes of this knowing they're going to be trapped like this forever. And with Michael and Dwight, no less, awkward. (Love how much fun the two of them are having here.)

You do wonder how they're going to fill the time, don't you. I mean... unlike most subsistence societies, they actually don't have to put all that much work into surviving. They're going to have to find ways to fill the hours.

Like, you know, that. (10)

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed
Date: September 05, 2021 Title: Chapter 17: Chapter 17

Awwww. Dwight! He's an old romantic at heart. Although this makes me feel kinda sad for Space!Angela. And VERY curious as to where he *did* get the material for those rings.

This entire chapter is ridiculously sweet. And the way you've paired it with the two of them growing in their comfort with the life they're going to live is a nice touch. (10)

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed
Date: September 05, 2021 Title: Chapter 23: Chapter 23

And for our final trick... we do what we probably should've done in the first place and go join Dwight to try to communicate with these extraterrestrial creatures.

I love you working in the Michael dialogue here, and in a totally organic way, and the description of the creatures. Before, of course, we get stuck in this SAME FREAKIN' ANTIMATTER STORM. *shakes first at the antimatter*

In general, this is just an impressive accomplishment of a fic, especially keeping track of common events across all timelines, but I especially like the touch of the rejoining timelines and the way that things that their decisions won't affect, like the way they're received in Houston, mainly stay the same.

I'm glad NASA, at least, is excited about all the alien life they're encountering - feels like Jim got a little caught up in the mystery of the signals and didn't quite take in what was happening.

I appreciate these crazy kids bantering in front of an international media audience. And the way NASA is clearly shipping them. (11)

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed
Date: September 05, 2021 Title: Chapter 24: Chapter 24

These two finding each other outside of the pressure of an adventure across the stars is a very sweet moment. And I'm glad we managed to avoid Pam's crisis of confidence this time around.

I love the throwback to the Michael Scott Paper Company arc and Michael's immediate nostalgia for days not really that long past.

And their romantic getaway on another planet is that much sweeter with the knowledge that this time they get to go back to Earth when it's over. And hey! We found the aliens who kept Jim and Pam as pets again! That's fun.

Ah. This was totally unintentional, but I'm kind of glad this is where I'm wrapping up. This feels like the ending of all endings here.

As noted, this is a heck of an accomplishment of a fic. I'd actually kinda love to see you expand on it - add new endings in future missions, allow them to solve the mystery of the signals - but putting together a story like this was a heck of a challenge, and you rose to it well. AND found some very charming opportunities for fluff amid the stars. Really fun work here. (11)

It Had to Be You by tinydundie Rated: M [Reviews - 147] 115
Summary: Feature

"There was a definite conflict within him: between the Jim who loved having Pam for a best friend and the Jim who wanted to press her up against the door of his apartment and kiss every single platonic thought out of her brain."

An AU loosely based on the film “When Harry Met Sally.”


Categories: Jim and Pam, Alternate Universe
Characters: Ensemble, Jim, Jim/Pam, Pam
Genres: Drama, Humor, Romance
Warnings: Adult language, Moderate sexual content
Series: None
Chapters: 15 Table of Contents
Completed: Yes Word count: 83821 Read Count: 22270 ePub Downloads: 18
[Report This] Published: August 09, 2021 Updated: November 12, 2021
Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed
Date: October 25, 2021 Title: Chapter 11: Chapter Eleven

Okay, Roy is the absolute worst here. I'm sure his behavior wasn't *actually* purposefully designed to make Pam spin out, but if it had been he could not have done a better job. (Actually, if he *had* done it on purpose he probably would have done a much worse job. Jerk.)

Jim realizing this is really about Pam's insecurities rather than about Roy and how this slides into them FINALLY hooking up is well executed. (Her being in the pajamas he got her is the cherry on the sundae.)

But the ending. Ooof. Oooof ooof oof. I am not emotionally prepared.

Lines I loved here:
“Thanks, but it’s more about the canvas than the artist.”

Author's Response: Dude, you rock. That is all.

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed
Date: October 25, 2021 Title: Chapter 10: Chapter Ten

Yeah, see... definitely feel less bad for Katy here, because she 100% knows what she's doing to Pam. Rude, Ms. Moore. That bit about Felicity is a good use of the world you built and also deeply infuriating.

This is a really good Kelly voice and a really good use of her in offering her... particularly Kelly-esque perspective on Pam's relationship(s). Such a troublemaker. But also ooof. Poor Kelly. Hopefully this is the wake-up call she needs... and Ryan gets what he deserves.

As you might have guessed, I enjoyed the way the Danny break-up played out. I think it plants some good seeds for the future, gives Pam some agency, places their relationship well in the broader context of the story, etc. "Jim would be proud of her" kills me.

And the way the Tribute of Lights stuff plays out is terrific - you've made really excellent and respectful use of 9/11 in this story and how it plays into their relationship directly and thematically.

Lines I loved here:
-“We were considering finding a new place in the meatpacking district, but I don’t think even I could handle the amount of ‘that’s what she said’ jokes that would become part of our daily lives.”
-They would shiver, but at least they’d shiver together.

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed
Date: October 25, 2021 Title: Chapter 9: Chapter Nine

Ooooof. Not going to lie, reading this at once, I feel a little bad for Katy. Not *too* bad, because, you know, I know what she's saying to Pam while this is happening. But Jim has handled this with a level of gracelessness that unintentionally crosses over into mean. Oh, well. She still looks like Amy Adams, I think she'll land on her feet.

The Valentine's Day call is a pretty sweet moment for them. They're just so good together. *sigh* And as usual, I'm loving what you're doing with Michael here. You did really well recasting some of his canon lines and making them fit with this story - his travails with Holly in canon really fit IHTBY Jim and Pam well!

LOVED this version of the baby fishmouth scene. Jim and Pam clearly showing they're on the same page, Jim's inability to draw, the soup snakes!

ALSO. THE FORESHADOWING IN THIS CHAPTER. EEEP.

Lines I loved here:
-“Is he a big guy? I will make an earnest attempt to kick his ass.”

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed 1
Date: August 10, 2021 Title: Chapter 1: Chapter One

First, again, I am SORRY and I will see When Harry Met Sally soon.

I really enjoy this version of Jim and Pam's first meeting - the pang Jim gets ("not for her, but for somebody") and the way it sets in and grows feels like a good description of what it's like falling for someone you've just met and realizing they're unavailable. I love Pam and Jim bonding, in this as in all universes, over their shared annoyance at Dwight and the way they just seem to fit.

Props for working Felicity in for this. Organic, timely, and also, FELICITY.

The unapologetically trope-y OH NO THERE'S ONLY ONE BED PLATONIC BED SHARING SCENE is fantastic, and kudos to you for leaning in to the sheer awkwardness of it and of the pain of Jim's realization of what's happening to him.

The end of this, in addition to being a good twist on what I understand of the concept of the movie, is a really interesting version of canon, too - they both still recognize their connection, but Jim seeing the potential for it hurting him and stepping back. Feels like there's a lot to say through this about what love is and isn't and how they each view it, and how that shapes how they treat each other. Real interested to see where you go with this!

Author's Response:

It's funny you bring up the Felicity thing because that IS my Casablanca moment (You'll know what I mean when you watch the movie!). When I grew older and continued switching my opinion on who was right for Felicity because I'd gone through more experiences myself and understood it differently.

So glad you're enjoying and do let me know when you watch it! I promise you'll love it. 

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed 1
Date: August 20, 2021 Title: Chapter 2: Chapter Two

Ooooooof. Way to lean directly into the slow, painful fall of this relationship. You really did solid work putting us in Pam's head, and letting us mourn along with her even for a relationship we know was doomed to fail. "It seemed that she was always leaving him nowadays" is a brutal line, and "she bit her tongue to keep from pointing out that apparently disappointing his fiancée wasn’t a problem for him" is just SO very Pam.

The sport/champ reference definitely made me giggle.

You did well bringing in the details of how much this trip has stuck with both of them, including the little notes of Jim remembering things he could have easily been forgiven for forgetting.

Ha. Adding the other passenger in the row in was the right call. Brings some solid humor into this.

Solid use of Kelly. Looking forward to seeing more of her. Also, Ryan is terrible.

Oh, man. I love Pam having the guts to have her Beach Games moment right here, and how this ends up twisting the original central question behind When Harry Met Sally into a Jam-appropriate framework. Lots of potential here.

Nice to see what Pam was thinking during the road trip here at the end. This would have absolutely fried Jim's mind to know.

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed 1
Date: August 25, 2021 Title: Chapter 3: Chapter Three

The opening line is a gut punch every time. I love the idea of 9/11 as a relationship tipping point for those who actually saw it up close and personal. May be showing my age there, but it definitely feels like something that would have a profound psychological effect on young Manhattanites. (Also, Pam's line about her cell phone is a good detail.)

This is a really good use of Michael, and he's definitely in charming Michael mode. And I'm enjoying the hints of soupsnakes to come.

The scene of Jim finding Pam again at the museum was GORGEOUS, and the image of the statue watching them while they caught up is hilarious. And the parallels of these two failing relationships, two (or four) people realizing they're not really in love with their partners is well done.

And thank goodness they've learned their lesson this time around. HOPEFULLY.

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed 1
Date: September 05, 2021 Title: Chapter 4: Chapter Four

It's a lot of fun having Jim and Pam back to their usual best-friends-mutually-pining ways. There's a lot of DEEPLY cute stuff in this chapter - I loved their just-on-the-safe-side-of-flirty phone call (REALLY good dialogue there) and Jim having subtly replaced Roy in her fantasies and the reshaping of Michael's birthday and their ice skating adventure and Pam's new pajamas. Lot of really good details here. (It's a fun remix of both Michael's Birthday AND The Client).

It's nice that even in this state, Jim is clearly filling a role that sorely needed filling for Pam... seems like they both are. They're a salve to each other's loneliness in a lonely and semi-apocalyptic-feeling city. And you did well with balancing Pam's joy at having someone filling that emotional role for her and her angst at not being able to take the next step.

Author's Response: Thanks so much as always for your amazing help!

Reviewer: darjeelingandcoke Signed 1
Date: September 14, 2021 Title: Chapter 5: Chapter Five

Ooooh. The angst is delicious. DEL.IC.IOUS. And pretty comically rendered! I really liked the Far Side-cartoon image of Jim in the friend zone and the adaptation of the batting cage scene (and mix of remixed Office lines and remixed WMHS lines, because Ryan is definitely Harryesque) is really well executed.

Pam's sheer joy at seeing him again is sweet, and the tour is highly enjoyable. The Temple of Dendur description was neat (really, this is a pretty effective tourist pitch for New York), and the use of La Grande Jatte as noted works on so many levels here... as does the way impressionist painting becomes a metaphor for the messiness of the relationship viewed up close. And bringing in the beauty of ordinary things to describe impressionism is a really strong connection.

LINDA. TRIPP. I'm getting nostalgic.

"He didn’t want to tell her that what he was looking at was actually the most beautiful woman he’d ever known." Oh, Jim.

Oh, and this is SUCH a fun version of the jinx. I love getting Holly's very bemused reaction to it. She and Michael really are well matched...