Date: October 15, 2007 07:48 pm Title: The Electric City
Wow! Mega-chapter is right!!
The detail about the treehouse is just amazing. This has been such a great story, and I really like how your wrapped it up. Nicely done.
Author's Response: I'm glad that you liked the detail about the treehouse. I was trying to find a romantic place for them to have their first date, and found it. Luckily, it opened at around the same time as they went on their first date. Also, the story isn't over quite yet, there are still some questions that need to be answered, and of course, Devil and Angel are still around. Thanks for the review lisahoo.
Date: October 15, 2007 06:30 pm Title: The Electric City
wow this was so great!
thanks for a great series!
Author's Response: I'm glad that you liked it. However, and I'm not sure if you were implying this, but the series/story isn't over quite yet. As Devil said there are still some questions that need to be answered, and of course, Devil and Angel are still around. Thanks for the review JamLover101.
10 [Report This]Date: October 15, 2007 03:24 pm Title: Pam's Problem
That was fan-friggin'-tastic.
Author's Response: Haha, I'm glad that you liked it. Thank you for the review officefreak.
Date: October 15, 2007 03:16 pm Title: The Electric City
somewhere in the middle of the story, i found myself googling the david wenzel tree house and falling in love with jammy goodness.
Author's Response: I'm admittedly a huge cheeseball, so I love my Jammy goodness as well. Thank you for the review Cashbasket.
Date: October 15, 2007 03:15 pm Title: Pam's Problem
This chapter blew me away! The glimpses into how Pam felt during Jim's BBQ and about the teapot and Christmas note were so well thought out. The way you described their date and Pam's feelings so clearly and descriptively was wonderful. I can't wait for the next chapter, especially after this one ended on such an honest note!
Author's Response: I'm glad that you liked the flashbacks, I was a little concerned about their length (TWSS), but I wanted to be as detailed and descriptive as possible. Usually, but not always, when I write a chapter it had a theme, or a point that is repeated, and for this one it was "honesty" so the flashbacks were sort of Pam's way of realizing how dishonest they've been with each other. Thank you for the review JAMtastic.
Date: October 15, 2007 02:47 pm Title: The Electric City
seriously, this is like the best thing ever. i've been feeling convicted lately of imagining Jim to be too much of a romantic, but oh freaking well. he ought to be romantic! this was a GREAT date and they're so precious! i also love how Pam kind of realized that Angel and Devil aren't gonna be around too much longer. it's perfect. *sigh*
Author's Response: I concur fully with that. Nobody is a perfect boyfriend, of course, but in my mind he would want to do something romantic and special for their first date. Also, like I said in the story, he had to have thought about this for years, so I think its pretty realistic to think he's going to bring it on their first date. Sadly, Angel and Devil are not too much longer for this world, though they will play a more prominent role next chapter. Thanks for the review and kind words rulesofjinx.
Date: October 15, 2007 01:24 pm Title: The Electric City
Oh come on! You can't leave us hanging like that. That's not the end, right?
Author's Response: I like to try to leave each chapter with a little bit of a cliffhanger, some more dramatic than others. Plus I was near 11,000 words, so it kinda needed to wrap up. That said, it is not the end, there still is a bit more story to tell. Thanks for the review nbyevu.
10 [Report This]Date: October 15, 2007 12:36 pm Title: Pam's Problem
So beautiful and perfect. My heart was in my throat. Such emotion. Happy that it's not done. More soon, please?
Author's Response: Thank you very much, this was a little bit of a different chapter in that there wasn't that much actions, but more descriptions of the thoughts going on in Pam's mind. So I'm glad that you found the emotional component of it touching, because that was definitely what I was going for. Thanks for the review NanReg.
Date: October 15, 2007 11:38 am Title: Pam's Problem
I was on my way out the door and I see this has an update. NOOOOOOOOOO!!!! Now I know there's an update and can't read it for 8 more hours. /shakesfist
Oh well, I have something to look forward to tonight.
Author's Response: That is bad timing, ouch. I hope you've gotten the chance to read it though. Thank you again for your previous review about updating. It took me a long time, but I finally got there. Thank you for the review Jordon.
10 [Report This]Date: September 17, 2007 10:16 pm Title: Pam's Problem
this so needs an update!
/poke
Author's Response: Thank you for your support of this story! I admit, fully, that I update this story much too slowly (usually between 10-14 days between chapters.) It's going to take a bit longer this time, because I've been so busy, and had to feed my fic-addiction through 55 worders. But fear not! Because, unlike "A Game of Global Domination" (which I feel terrible about, by the way)....I am not going to leave this hanging (though I fully intend to return to AGoFD). Anyway, Devil/Pam/Angel and Jim will be going a-dating soon enough.
Date: September 07, 2007 08:00 pm Title: Looking Into The Mirror
This story is freaking awesome!
I just discovered it and I love it so much. But I gotta say my favourite character in the story is Devil, lol. She cracks me up.
Author's Response: I'm glad that you like Devil, she is definitely the most fun character in the story. She pretty much gets the majority of the jokes, and gets to say dirty/bad things. Which, by the way, will continue during their date, despite the fact that Pam got mad at her for the sex discussion. And, I'm glad you liked the story, thank you for the review RoccoBidelli.
10 [Report This]Date: September 07, 2007 12:47 pm Title: Looking Into The Mirror
Okay, by the end of this, I had a huge smile on my face and maybe I was kindasorta crying a little but that's only because I'm a huge freaking sap and I loved Jim's gift for Pam because that's just so.. Jim. And I loved that you had Pam wear a Nirvana shirt as opposed to something a little less casual because Jim would truly find that awesome. Heee. The thing I love most about this story (among a lot of things, mind you) is that you have Pam and Jim down so perfectly and it makes it so fun to read because I can just see it happening. I've said that before but it's definitely worth mentioning again after this incredible chapter. You continue to awe me, dundie, and I absolutely cannot wait to see where you take Pam (and Devil and Angel) next. I'm sure it'll be as beautiful as every single chapter already is.
Author's Response:
As always, your review is wonderful and awesome. I'm glad that you liked the Nirvana shirt and Jim's gift. I tried, and will continue to try, to be a little different with respect to their date. Also, I figure that despite the fact that Jim decided that day to go on a date with Pam, he must have thought it through a lot of times, for many years.
Also, thank you for your comment on characterization. I try to get Pam and Jim somewhat close to how I think they would work/speak off-camera. So I'm glad that you find that believable. Thank you for the fantastic review, oobadnama.
10 [Report This]Date: September 07, 2007 09:29 am Title: Pam's Problem
Yeah, I really love this. I especially enjoy that you take the time to really flesh everything out, and create an involving, in depth story that doesn't rush over anything. Awesome stuff, looking forward to the next (last? I hope not) chapter.
How the hell has this not gotten a blue ribbon yet?
Author's Response:
Wow, what a very nice review. I definitely try to take my time and flesh out a lot of the thoughts/anxieties/etc. in Pam's mind. I really like that aspect of writing fic, so that's what I'm going for in this story. My next chapter will not be my last one either. I'm not going to guess the word count that it will take to cover the first date in its entirety/complexity but it will be more than one chapter.
Ha, I have no idea how the ribbon system works, but I'm okay with it. I don't write for ribbons/read counts/reviews.
That said, I do like reviews, so thank you for yours, Jordon.
Date: September 07, 2007 07:36 am Title: Looking Into The Mirror
Wow -- awesome chapter! Pam's reaction to Jim's invitation -- Devil & Angel talking about sex (a thousand times with Roy -- good point!). And Jim's paintbrush bouquet is adorable :o)
Author's Response: I'm glad that you liked those moments of the chapter. With respect to Pam/Roy, that always seems like something that is in a lot of fics that I've never understood. That because Pam was with one guy, she needs Jim to take control or lead her, or something....So I thought I'd flip it around, and show that Pam is more experienced and perhaps more confident. She's not nervous about the sex, she's nervous about everything that leads to it. Thanks for the review lisahoo.
10 [Report This]Date: September 07, 2007 06:53 am Title: Looking Into The Mirror
*sniff*......totally perfect
Author's Response: That's so kind, thank you. Hopefully they'll be more sniffle-worthy moments coming up for the first date. Though it won't be totally clear sailing. Thank you for the review officefreak.
Date: September 07, 2007 06:51 am Title: The DEFCON Is Rising
Wow loved this chapter and want to read more.
Author's Response: Thank you very much, I'm glad that you liked it. More is coming, I'm covering the first date, and then ending the story. I'm not going to even approx. how many words that is going to take because I know I'll be way off. Thanks for the review gotkona.
10 [Report This]Date: September 07, 2007 05:08 am Title: Pam's Problem
This was such a wonderful chapter. Truly loved it. I'm so happy you're not done yet! Update really soon?
Author's Response: I'm really glad you liked the chapter. It was definitely a different kind of chapter in the story itself, and the type that I write anyway. I'm not exactly sure when the next chapter will be up, they take a while to write, but I won't leave anyone hanging. Thanks so much for the review NanReg.
Date: August 27, 2007 03:19 pm Title: I'm Sorry, What Was The Question?
Ha! Devil definitely has her priorities straight. Honey is a must. :) Cute chapter!
Author's Response: I'm glad that you liked that line. Devil is going to push that priority throughout the first date pretty hard as well. Thank you for your review Semby.
Date: August 26, 2007 04:39 pm Title: I'm Sorry, What Was The Question?
I'm always happy to see an update to this story! Is it sad that I was hoping you'd get to the date in this chapter? Since it was so long, I thought there might be a chance! Haha. I honestly can't wait to see what you have in mind. Reading this story is almost better than re-watching these episodes, because you provide such a realistic and fun spin on things. One really minor thing - it kind of bugged me to see the titles of the HP books underlined. I think it's kind of standard to use italics for titles of books, magazines, etc. But that's extremely, extremely minor. Looking forward to reading more!
Author's Response:
Thank you for the comment on putting fun spins on things. I try to flesh out what we see in the episode with inner monologue and actions off-camera. So, I"m glad that you liked that.
About the underlining of the book titles, as far as I know you can either do italics or underlining. I too, normally would italicize book titles, but because italics are reserved for Angel, I chose to underline. Thank you for your review supergirlsudz.
10 [Report This]Date: August 26, 2007 01:01 pm Title: I'm Sorry, What Was The Question?
Hee!!! "...Make sure we stop on the way home and buy some honey" cracked me up!!
I'm so glad to see that you finally updated (and I can see at 11000 words why it took you SO LONG to do so! You are far more ambitious with your chapter writing than I am).
I'm a little bummed that there wasn't more Devil/Angel thoughts during Jim's actual, "Are you free for dinner tonight?" but meh...I'm not complaining, and the chapter was still magnificent. :)
Author's Response: Ha, I really wasn't trying to be as ambitious as 11,000 words, it just happened. Without the framework of an episode, the first date will probably be 2-3 shorter chapters, instead of one mega-chapter. As for the Devil/Angel thoughts, the reason that I didn't have them reply immediately to Jim's words was because I wanted to emphasize Pam's shock, and also make it Pam's moment, not Angel or Devil's. That said, there will be plenty of them commenting on the words and the date in general coming up. Thank you for the review I Know This Much Is True.
Date: August 25, 2007 11:54 pm Title: Pam's Problem
Mmm I know I said I was looking forward to this most recent chapter as much as the S4 premiere, but I must amend that to the NEXT chapter... can. not. wait.
This was so freaking good, you have a great sense of humor that keeps some pretty angsty stuff both funny and sweet - I love this story.
Author's Response: Such very kind words, thank you. This story can descend rather deeply into angst, but I'm glad that you saw that I at least try to balance it with humor (which is something the show does). The next chapter will be very interesting(I hope), Devil and Angel will, of course, have very different viewpoints on what a date with Jim should entail. Especially, with regard to how it should end. With so many wonderful first date fics, I'm going to try my best to create something that at least has some fresh parts. Thank you for your great review Jordon, I appreciate it greatly.
Date: August 25, 2007 08:45 pm Title: The DEFCON Is Rising
“Well that’s true…But, I guess the unconscious part of your mind that wants to cross ankles on the small of Jim’s back is just a little tired…okay?” Devil said with a slight edge, then sighed and sat down on Pam’s shoulder. She unzipped and re-zipped the top of her tracksuit forcefully. "
That line in particular caused me to do spit-take on my computer. So hilarious!
Author's Response: I'm glad you liked that line, its a fun description of Devil, I think. That side of her will be in full force in my next chapter which will cover some of, or all of, her first date with Jim. Thank you for your review Pamela Beesley (good name too).
10 [Report This]Date: August 25, 2007 08:34 pm Title: I'm Sorry, What Was The Question?
Wow. This was just as amazing as I thought it would be, it did not disappoint. Just. Yes. All of this.. yes. Pam pranking Andy, genius. Devil losing it with Dwight, brilliant. I know I've said it before but I just do not comprehend how you've been able to do this so beautifully but I ADORE it and I'm not sure if there will be any other writing that deals with Pam so internally done so well. I'm a little sad that there's only a chapter left but I cannot wait to read it. Spectatular job, per usual, dundie. :)
Author's Response: As always, you are too kind. This was, by far, the most difficult chapter of the story for me to write (thus far), so I'm very glad that you liked it. Trying to do justice to Pam's complicated thoughts and feelings (or at least what I assume them to be) was tricky. Also, I wouldn't be sure that there is only one chapter left. No promises, of course, because I haven't written it yet, but its possible it might go longer (2 parter). It also might be a two-parter because I'd like to keep the chapter length down a bit. It's difficult to keep an 11,000 word chapter coherent, with some continuity, and interesting. Either way, it would be what's best of the story, I wouldn't artificially lengthen of shorten anything for read counts or reviews, I promise. That said, thank you for your awesome, as always, review oobadnama!
Date: August 15, 2007 03:36 am Title: The DEFCON Is Rising
I love all the thought processes you've got going on here leading to everything we saw her to do in the finale, especially the planning of planting the yogurt lid. And Devil being the one to point out she'd used a Popeye line, hee!
Author's Response: It's a lot of fun to try and figure out the inner workings of Pam's mind, and how that relates to what we see on camera. Thank you for the review, Semby.
Date: August 14, 2007 01:24 pm Title: Jesus! in the Conference Room
At least Angel had the right idea at the end.
Author's Response: Angel is more worried about other people noticing then the act itself. Conscience. Thanks for your review gotkona.