Reviews For Cardiac Care
You must login (register) to review or leave jellybeans
Reviewer: LuxTenebrae Signed [Report This]
Date: August 07, 2008 07:15 pm Title: Saturday Morning

I'm so in love with this story and can never wait for more updates! Eeeee!

Author's Response: I haven't seen your name before.  Thanks for taking the time to leave a comment!  I really do appreciate it.  Especially the Eeeee!

Reviewer: khand3stooges Signed [Report This]
Date: August 07, 2008 07:06 pm Title: Saturday Morning

I have a huge grin on my face because you have updated this story.  I loved seeing them have a moment before going back to the grind.  Thank you so much.

Author's Response: Thanks so much!  I'm glad you liked it!

Reviewer: lisahoo Signed [Report This]
Date: August 07, 2008 06:48 pm Title: Saturday Morning

Loving this glimpse into fake-Halpert domestic bliss.


Author's Response:

Hey, lisahoo!

Glad you liked my fake domestic bliss.  So, how was your trip to Michaels?

Reviewer: NanReg Signed [Report This]
Date: August 07, 2008 06:43 pm Title: Saturday Morning

Ah, VB, I'm so happy!  I was thinking of you today, hoping we hadn't lost you to the evil block.  What an excellent chapter! 

Loved this paragraph and it's call back to Jim's chapter:  "Some people wake up fully aware and ready to meet the day...."

Have I told you how happy I am?  I'm happy : )



Author's Response:

Hi, NR!

Yes, the evil block was starting to get the better of me!  But my amazing posse helped me to defeat it!  I really can't say enough what a big help deerinthepark, callisto and e-star were.  I was starting to poop out a bit and get sloppy and they slapped me right back into line.  You have them to thank if you think it was an excellent chapter!

I'm glad I made you happy!

Reviewer: just-once Signed [Report This]
Date: August 04, 2008 02:41 pm Title: Jim

The most beautiful line in this chapter to me was, "How had he ever thought he was past wanting this?" *sigh* Really, really good chapter.


Author's Response: Thanks very much, just-once!  Next one should be up soon.  Typing up to send to my new beta readers tonight!

Reviewer: variella Signed [Report This]
Date: August 03, 2008 07:01 am Title: Jim

It is really hard for me not to make a deafening girly squee right now that you could hear even over the internet!

Um, this is going to be a long comment- feel free to skim.

Most important, you're concentrating on the friendship- I thought that was crucial considering Pam's motivations for going. Love Jim reinforcing it by talking about repairing their friendship first (btw, I loved your 'fractured friendship' phrase; perfect because it wasn't quite broken, but.... yeah, perfect).

Jim's using the Australian slang for Pam's behaviour was cool because it worked for me to show how he could be honest about how he felt to Pam while avoiding calling her blind, ridiculous, or something. I thought other words could have led to an argument, but by using the slang they could concentrate on how he felt- and it was a little humorous to keep things more relaxed.

Jim makes friends pretty easily, it seems, so making a friend like that for a night just seemed so Jim. Oh, and I'm so glad he didn't sleep with her.

Thanks for describing the scene from both points of view- always cool to hear and takes some skill from the writer to get inside both heads without being redundant.

I am so in love with this story- even though the title 'Cardiac Care' right next to your username kind of freaks me out when I see it ;)

Author's Response:

Hi, variella!

First of all, thanks so much for leaving such a detailed review!  It is always helpful to get a sense of "what works" and what doesn't.  I'm glad the Australian slang part worked for you because I have a sense that that particular chapter fell flat for a lot of readers.  It's a bit better now that I've revised it ... but it might get more editing later.

Your last comment had me laughing out loud.  I can't believe I never thought of the irony of the juxtaposition of "Cardiac Care" with "Vampiric Blood." 

I'll look forward to constructive feedback from you on future chapters?  Yes?

Thanks again!

Reviewer: dylan619xf Signed [Report This]
Date: August 02, 2008 08:12 pm Title: Jim

I'm loving this story, especially the mention of York (my hometown!). Well, and all the JAM goodness. :-)

Author's Response: I'm glad you like the story!  Didja like that reference to the Sheetz by the Saturn dealership?  That kind of freaked out vodka_rebellion, who is also from York!  :)

Reviewer: NanReg Signed [Report This]
Date: July 31, 2008 12:20 pm Title: Jim

We now interrupt our regularly-scheduled programming for a Diana Ross karaoke moment *clears throat*:  OooOooOooOoo I'm missing you...  Am I being subtle enough?  Don't throw trash at me, VB, I got nothin' but love for ya.  However, I still don't know how Jim and Pam wound up spooning and I'm heading for the beach tonight for the weekend!  What's a girl to do?! 



Author's Response:

I'm so sorry, NanReg!  I am a bit stumped on the next chapter and have had a bunch of real life stuff to take care of lately.  Damn those adult responsibilities!

I won't throw trash at you if you don't throw any at me for taking longer on this chapter.

Reviewer: berrycakefan Signed [Report This]
Date: July 30, 2008 12:12 pm Title: Jim

Oh, I love this story so much! I love the sense of peace that you've given us in these last two chapters. Instead of the constant whirring of machine beeps that I imagine in the ICU, I was just hearing the silence of contentment in these. Yay for the feelings that are emerging!

So hop right to it!!!!

Author's Response:

Thanks so much, berrycakefan!  Yeah, I figured Jim, Pam and all my readers had earned a little serenity.  I'm hopping but not much is coming.  Trying to make sure I don't get mired in writer's block again.

I really appreciate your review.  Thanks.

Reviewer: Jinxcoke Signed [Report This]
Date: July 29, 2008 12:10 am Title: Jim

So we should be getting an update soon right? I keep checking for one! I really hope so!

Author's Response: Thanks, Jinxcoke!  This next one is coming slower than I would like ... but I'm working it.  Really!

Reviewer: JennInTheCity Signed 9 [Report This]
Date: July 28, 2008 06:48 pm Title: Jim

Aw, two chapters in a row with just Jim and Pam and no medical stuff or Pam being all knowing and Jim being clueless. Love it :)

Author's Response: Wow.  Now that is a back-handed compliment!  Well, I'm glad you liked this one.  Next one will be back in the hospital.

Reviewer: iwantphillyjim Signed [Report This]
Date: July 28, 2008 06:24 pm Title: Jim

Ok, we got a chapter so your Dundie is in the mail...Now, where's the next chapter, I'll send you Michael's chattering teeth so you can make a Harvey with your PC monitor. Sound like a deal?

Author's Response: Dealio!  I'll be looking for the FedEx man in the morning!

Reviewer: lisahoo Signed [Report This]
Date: July 28, 2008 04:36 pm Title: Prologue

Thanks for noticing [/Eeyore]

They're getting better -- the husband is watching the kids and I'm going to Michael's.  Woot.



Author's Response: I'm glad things are getting better!  You had me confused for a moment there.  I thought you were talking about the show at first when you said you were going to Michaels.  Then I realized you probably meant the craft store.  I hope you find some fun stuff!

Reviewer: grammarfreak Signed [Report This]
Date: July 28, 2008 03:28 pm Title: Fair Dinkum Drongo

the circular language thing is actually cockney from wales in the uk, if you were interested

Author's Response:

Do you mean like the crazy derivation of "seppo?"  How do you know about this?

I love your name!

Reviewer: Iheartstanley Signed [Report This]
Date: July 28, 2008 03:26 pm Title: Jim

It's okay you write good stories!

Author's Response: Thanks, Iheartstanley!  I appreciate it.

Reviewer: lisahoo Signed [Report This]
Date: July 28, 2008 09:55 am Title: Jim

Well, if you can only give us a short chapter, then those are some lovely thoughts to plant on a crummy Monday.

Author's Response:

Lisahoo, this is the second review where you're talking about a crappy day.  I hope things are ok for you.

Thanks for taking the time to leave me a note!  You know I always look for your comments.

Reviewer: untherapy Signed [Report This]
Date: July 28, 2008 07:49 am Title: Jim

So did they fall asleep apart and wake up together? Or did a conversation happen that you are strategically witholding for now?? Either way, yay for morning cuddling :)

Author's Response:

Um, yes.  Fell asleep apart and woke entwined in the middle of the night.  Guess I'll make that clear at the beginning of the next chapter.

Thanks for the question.

Reviewer: NanReg Signed [Report This]
Date: July 28, 2008 06:37 am Title: Jim

So good to have you back, VB!  IMHO, this chapter was worth the wait.  You once again created such a cozy little cocoon.  I enjoyed Jim's thought process and the visual you created.  Can't wait for more!



Author's Response: Thanks, NanReg!  I'm so glad you thought it was worth the wait.  Two such short ones in a row left me a bit worried.  (I know ... TWSS!)  I hope to have another up in a couple of days.  It'll be longer.

Reviewer: raspberryjam Signed [Report This]
Date: July 28, 2008 12:00 am Title: Jim

Ah! I think you killed me during this wait! But, miraculously, I came back to life because this chapter was perfect! I'm glad Jim is finally coming to his senses. I can't wait to keep reading :)

Author's Response: You crack me up, raspberryjam!  I'm glad you liked the chapter.  Jim's definitely going to come to his senses soon!

Reviewer: Jinxcoke Signed [Report This]
Date: July 27, 2008 11:14 pm Title: Jim

Can't wait for more! I just got back from vacation and was SOO excitd to see an update! More soon PLEASE!!

Author's Response:

Thanks a lot!  Coupla days till the next one...

Reviewer: space invested Signed [Report This]
Date: July 27, 2008 10:33 pm Title: Jim

one word, fantastic.

Author's Response: Thanks!

Reviewer: MelBal Signed [Report This]
Date: July 26, 2008 10:10 am Title: She Felt Whole

I've read the last few chapters so many times just to help enjoy this last little gem (and the warm fuzzies it gives me.). So short-so perfect. Please don't let Pam catch Jim saying Karen's name in his sleep. I might chuck my laptop out the window.

Author's Response: Thanks, MelBal!  I'm glad you liked this chapter, even though it was so short.  And I will never, ever have Jim say that K word in his sleep!  Perish the thought!  Your laptop is safe.

Reviewer: iwantphillyjim Signed [Report This]
Date: July 22, 2008 06:47 pm Title: She Felt Whole

That is bliss, I didn't even see this posted until now. I'll give you your shortest chapter Dundie when the next chapter is posted!

Author's Response: Thanks!  Like I said, I'll have to wait about a week for that shortest chapter Dundie.  Leaving in the morning and won't be able to post till Monday.  I'll try to work on the chapter longhand so I can get it up asap.  (TWSS!)

Reviewer: just-once Signed [Report This]
Date: July 21, 2008 01:28 pm Title: She Felt Whole

I'm lovin' it, lovin' it. You know I'm just living for your next update, don't you? Are you writing now? I hope so. :)


Author's Response: Thanks, just-once.  I'm really glad your lovin' it, lovin' it!  I will get the next chapter up as soon as I can but, as I just wrote to MCC, it will be a week.  I'll try to make it worth the wait!

Reviewer: NanReg Signed [Report This]
Date: July 21, 2008 08:29 am Title: Friday Night

So, since this and the subsequent chapters have been in my head all night, I felt the need to comment again since I didn't specifically address Tori and Naomi.  I thought that whole sequence was brilliant.  I love your analysis, and for Jim to have to listen to it?  Love it.  Cracked me up that they're teens and imparting these deep insights.  Oh, and Pam's thoughts in the chapel?  Heartbreaking and so real.

Guh.  I'm obsessed...but it's fun. 



Author's Response: Hi, NanReg!  I will show my age and say my son just graduated from high school.  (But you had to know he's about 18 if I was going to ship him off to Africa by himself!)  He was in marching band ... which is FILLED with AP students.  Let's just say, Tori & Naomi's observations don't seem so far-fetched to me after spending years listening to these kids!  Glad you liked the chapel scene, too!

You must login (register) to review or leave jellybeans