Date: February 27, 2008 10:24 pm Title: Don't bend.
Oh it is ON now! I can't wait for what happens next. I didn't expect a new chapter this quickly, so I suppose it would be pushing my luck to ask for ANOTHER one just as quickly! I'm ready for these two kids to have it out and then make nice...real nice. :-)
10 [Report This]Date: February 27, 2008 10:45 am Title: Don't bend.
I'm loving this story. I hope that Pam finially tells Jim how she has been feeling. My favorite part was:
She wondered if parks were lies adults told to children. She wondered if innocence was a thing like Santa Claus and if romance was a thing like the Easter Bunny. She wondered if silence could deafen even the smallest of ears and she wondered if heartache could seep into the ground and spread like disease.
Please update soon.
Date: February 27, 2008 10:40 am Title: Don't bend.
Whoa! Go Pam and I can't wait to see how it goes from here!
10 [Report This]Date: February 27, 2008 07:53 am Title: Don't think.
I think I loved this chapter most of all. Of course Jim is at the bar hitting on someone. Of course. And I love how Pam gets her nerve back...doesn't decide that Jim must not love her because he's flirting with someone else. So good. And Jim followed her! Gah! More More More!!!!
Date: February 27, 2008 05:59 am Title: Don't bend.
Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh! I need more!!!!!!!!!! Feed my addiction!!!!!!!!!!
OK...I feel a bit better now.
"And how long would she have to wait to shed her girlishness and become this lioness she had somewhere inside of her? How many years of princess would she suffer before she was a queen?" Very cool.
Date: February 27, 2008 03:36 am Title: Don't bend.
You killed me with this:
Man in this paper-salesman way and man like Jim who’d been so steady and sure for her, who’d been supportive unintentionally and who had everything weighted and holy inside of him and who could stir up in her these storms of electirc heat and who could stare at her with the waves of the earth crashing inside of him.
Just gorgeous. Now tell him, Pam, tell him!
Date: February 27, 2008 02:51 am Title: Don't bend.
FNB! Okay, so she hit a little speed bump, but she is not going to be denied! Unbelievable. I'm pretty much wiped out here, but I recover quickly, so, you know, if you wanted to get the next chapter up today, that would be fine.
Date: February 26, 2008 05:02 pm Title: Don't do this.
Ouch, indeed. And Jim letting it out like that was mighty satisfying. I'm hoping that will help her rather than hurt her, but she's so fragile here I can't really tell what will make or break her. But she had to see that what Roy's doing is not okay, and what she's doing to Jim is not okay either. Looking forward to seeing where this goes from here!
Date: February 26, 2008 02:04 pm Title: Don't do this.
Dude, I am STOKED that Jim let her have it. Listen, I'm all for understanding, mature, beautiful hearted Jim...but she had it coming. The way you handled his realization and the confrontation were absolutely PERFECT. If it didn't make JKras cry it sure as heck made him say "hell yeah!"
Date: February 26, 2008 12:56 pm Title: Don't do this.
I was wondering how you were going to expose this, and this was the way to do it! I LOVE how you made Jim find out and I love the angst of it! Jim has the right to be mad and I really like what you did with this.
Date: February 26, 2008 12:10 pm Title: Don't do this.
Oh yeah. I'm all about yelling at Stupid!Weak!Pam. Heh. But dang. I thought you said that Jim was going to figure some things out like three chapters ago? Hee!
Date: February 26, 2008 11:10 am Title: Don't speak.
Gah! Poor Jim. I hate seeing him being used like this but again...it's so in character for Pam to do it. The boy's only got so much willpower and then it's gone.
Date: February 26, 2008 11:05 am Title: Don't think.
Ooh, ouch. Punishing Jim for her own weakness? Unfortunately, I can believe it. I think you've really nailed Pam's character. She wouldn't have confronted Roy. She would have kept it all inside her. She's really grown a lot and character studies like this help to illustrate just how much has changed about the things that she chooses to be.
Date: February 26, 2008 09:08 am Title: Don't do this.
That felt very good! I'm glad the issues are finally getting out into the open now. I was a little surprised at Jim projecting his anger onto Pam, but I can understand it. He's not gonna confront Roy, basically because he'll get his ass kicked, but also because Roy's infidelity is not his business. Whereas Pam is his business. Both because of his feelings toward her and the fact that she got him involved in the situation.
When he told her he would never do that to her? About as close a declaration of love and caring that we've heard from him in this story. Good job, Jim.
Date: February 26, 2008 07:16 am Title: Don't do this.
This chapter felt very satisfying to me in a way even though it was also sad and upsetting (no crying here though, lol. Work on that for next time :-P). I was glad Jim confronted Pam. But I still felt bad for her in the end. I loved this part:
He stared hard at her back to try to get her to feel the way he was looking at her. Soft. Steady. Painfully himself. “I would never do what he’s doing to you,” he promised, his voice quiet and catching on the last word because it was full of so much truth.
Those words just paint such an image in my head. This story is just chock full of quality!
Date: February 26, 2008 06:36 am Title: Don't do this.
Where to begin. Ok. Obviously, this was so fantastically good. You know, you surprised me. Dummy that I am, I guess I didn't expect Jim to feel angry and used. I had the let's-see-why-Pam's-acting-this-way-so-I-can-better-understand-her approach in my head. You surprised me, and I love it. Now I have to read it again...
Date: February 26, 2008 06:04 am Title: Don't do this.
Yeah, she did need some yelling and Jim did deserve the dignity of knowing what was going on and getting angry about it. And he would never do that to her. So true.
Now she needs to give him back the clean and shiny fairy tale and get rid of the grimy mess of Roy.
Date: February 26, 2008 04:35 am Title: Don't do this.
Thank you very much for keeping me awake since 3:30 am! I was just going to be up for a few minutes and then try to fall back to sleep, but...new chapter. And such a good one, too.
I really like the choice you made about not having Jim confront Roy, but Pam instead. As much as I would've liked to see a Jim-Roy smackdown at some point, this wasn't the right time or the right issue. Loved Jim feeling covered by the dirt that Roy was throwing around. But him saying "I would never do what he's doing to you" and her nod of acknowledgement...wow. Right in the griefbone! Yes, I did want to yell at her, but I want to give her a hug, too. Looks like the ball's in her court now - she's going to have to do something. I can't wait to see what that is! Of course, I wouldn't mind seeing her eventually get her tongue down Jim's throat again...:-)
Date: February 25, 2008 10:08 pm Title: Don't do this.
Oh man. I'm not going to attempt a coherent review. Holy shit, are you awesome.
9 [Report This]Date: February 24, 2008 03:27 pm Title: Don't think.
I'm coming to this one a little late in the game, but wow, I love it. I love not-perfect Pam, and I love how realistic you've written the interactions. Oh, and I also love Dar Williams, so: win-win (win).
I never saw the first incarnation of the last chapter, but I do think this version is great. It has a calm-before-the-storm feeling... I'm dying for more!
10 [Report This]Date: February 24, 2008 03:26 pm Title: Don't move.
The following is I think one of the most beautiful sad and true things I've ever had the pleasure of reading:
Not everything was tangible…he knew that first hand. Not everything was black and white, or black and blue, because some prisons were built and locked by the prisoner and not the guard, and some wounds were invisible. Not everyone was able to proclaim things or declare things or confess things, because some people had action instead.
Your writing is almost prose. You amaze me. Surely you are a professional writer. Do you have anything in my local Barnes and Noble? Because if you did, I would most certainly buy it ;-)
Date: February 24, 2008 12:10 pm Title: Don't worry.
I read this quickly last night and reread it today a bit slower. I really liked the whole autumn dream sequence with the contrast of Pam literally burying herself in dry, dead leaves, and later thinking of the endless possibilities in front of her, symbolized by the ocean. And I'm so proud of Jim for maintaining his calm, patient demeanor around her. Hopefully, it will pay off the way he wishes.
Date: February 24, 2008 08:59 am Title: Don't worry.
I was so excited to see an update, and this didn't disappoint--calming, soothing, yet still a storm brewing beneath the surface. Really great.
Date: February 24, 2008 08:36 am Title: Don't worry.
Ah, that was beautiful. I have always admired people who could write dream sequences and this one was especially fascinating. She wondered how he could do that...have the ocean in him. Gorgeous line. Can't wait for more!
Date: February 24, 2008 08:06 am Title: Don't worry.
So, I've been reading all along but haven't left you a review yet, mostly because I'm lazy, not because this story doesn't deserve it. I'm definitely enjoying it even though I want to slap this Pam in the face for acting this way. I think the new chapter five does fit with the rest of the story better, but I kind of missed the part when Jim buys her a hot dog even though she said she didn't want one. But that's my sentimental side talking. Anyways, glad you're back and I'm looking forward to seeing where else you take this.