Date: March 10, 2008 01:27 pm Title: Don't think.
Ohh my god. WOW. This is amazing, absolutely amazing -- and yeah, it's dark, but you know what? I think you're really offering a very realistic glimpse into Pam's psyche here. I love it that she's aware on some level that Jim's the guy she wants, but she translates that into waiting for Roy to grow up and become Jim. Again, I think that's a really believable way to present how she deals with the disappointment of settling with Roy.
And as usual -- too, too many beautiful lines to count. I've said it before and I'll say it again: Your prose flows like poetry -- just gorgeous, absolutely gorgeous.
Date: March 09, 2008 07:53 pm Title: Don't think.
Hey, i really like the calm you gave Pam here. It's so nice to see especially after all the heck we all put them both through. :-) BTW, I like taking them to each others homes because I think it is another level of intimacy. You know this is the room I grew up in.... so I feel you there. Really nice work as always. So seriously I hate to dredge up an old story but any chance i could get a little karen/dawson? :-)
10 [Report This]Date: March 09, 2008 07:20 pm Title: Don't forget where you've been.
Steeeeeeaaaammmm!!! Please? This is the first time I have ever reviewed on here, but I had to ask. I love this story (and all of your writing) and I don't want it to end.
Date: March 09, 2008 06:47 pm Title: Don't forget where you've been.
Aww, that's so fun! I think you played the final moments of the Roy/Pam relationship just right. I think if she were going to do the screaming thing, she would have done it like she said - when she found them.
I love Jim calling Pam and her inviting him over to her mom's house. So adorable! It seems very real that it would be awkward at first, learning how to deal with each other now that she's NOT engaged.
Oh and this is one vote for steam!
Date: March 09, 2008 06:36 pm Title: Don't forget where you've been.
Requesting steam.
Thank you muchly.
Date: March 09, 2008 06:08 pm Title: Don't forget where you've been.
I have to agree, I like the quiet reserved way Pam extricated herself from that life. And yes, it makes total sense for her to go to her mom's and to try to regain her sense of balance -- it must be a huge change to have your fiance out of your life, and move, and have your best friend move into some other role, so I can see wanting to go back to your childhood home to 'start over' in a sense in redefining who you are as an adult.
(And of course, you know that Pam & Jim should christen the new bed she is going to have to buy for her new apartment. There's still a month to go before 4/10, the people need it!!)
Date: March 09, 2008 05:21 pm Title: Don't forget where you've been.
So excited that this was updated. Sorry to see it ending. Count me in for requesting some steam! I could totally see Pam behaving this way before she became FNB. I've enjoyed this very much. You are one of my favorite authors.
Date: March 09, 2008 04:30 pm Title: Don't forget where you've been.
Listen here, SG! I am SO with EverybodyHurts on this thing but even moreso because after the initial steam, I let you rip my guts out and make me cry. Chapter after chapter, with the bawling. Hand over the steam, sister, or somebody's going to hurt!
This was absolutely perfect. Roy and Pam leaving each other in this quiet, resigned way is just right. It was perfect that he really didn't get it and that Pam felt sorry for him because of it.
Her mom, though. Man, that's the part that got me, her saying she was proud of her and how Pam hadn't really thought of everything like that. While the screaming might have been satisfying for the moment, that ugly memory would have stole some of her dignity, which is completely intact now.
I love that she needs "at least a day" to cleanse her palate and be ready for Jim! I mean, it takes time to shave your legs and stuff, right? Hell, she's been ready for him for a long time now. Let the steam begin!
10 [Report This]Date: March 09, 2008 04:19 pm Title: Don't forget where you've been.
Aw, this chapter ended very sweetly. And as much as I wanted Pam to blast Roy, their ending here felt very right for this story.
And steam you say? I could go for that. (Although can it not take place in Pam's mom's house? At least not for their first time, lol)
Date: March 09, 2008 04:08 pm Title: Don't forget where you've been.
This was a lovely chapter. I really enjoyed Pam's calmness and surety with Roy. Going to her mom's allows her a quiet respite before she moves on to the next phase of her life.
And speaking of which, what do you mean about the conclusion to this epic? You have Pam basically ripping into him and his damn belt buckle in the first chapter, and you're only going to give us steam if we beg now that we're at the end???
Well, you've got one vote here for steam. I will start a campaign to convince you that this is the only way to go.
10 [Report This]Date: March 09, 2008 04:08 pm Title: Don't forget where you've been.
Feel free to explore steam, because I would just LOVE that : )
Her mother changed the sheets in her old bedroom and her mother made meatloaf and mashed potatoes and her mother wrapped her up in long and lean arms and whispered into her ear that she was proud. Such a lovely image.
Date: March 08, 2008 11:31 am Title: Don't break.
this is amazing.
Date: March 06, 2008 06:18 am Title: Don't break.
Very moving, very delicate scene you've written here. I feel like I'm intruding on a very private moment, this baring of their souls. I love how Jim intuitively knows that this is a turning point in their relationship, and allows Pam her time to speak. And then reassures her yet again, that she is beautiful to him. Awww, sniff.
Date: March 05, 2008 09:23 pm Title: Don't break.
What a COMPLETELY SATISFYING READ. And that is high praise. There are few stories that are actually satisfying from beginning to end. I kept recalling that pivotal line..."I would never do what he's doing to you" even in THIS chapter. That's a mark of a great story, when I can quote lines from it. And this ending did not disappoint at all. Both of them volleying their insecurities until finally they both felt for the first time -- completely secure. Loved this! Somewhere...JKras is crying. ;-)
Date: March 05, 2008 07:57 pm Title: Don't break.
Amazing! I love your symbols. you write Jim and Pam so well, exactly how I would expect them to act. And I looove the ending!
Date: March 05, 2008 06:04 pm Title: Don't break.
Wonderful! I love the big paragraphs of her disjointed confession... I love that it's non-linear and all over the place, it seems very Pam, and definitely very confused-trying-to-be-honest-Pam. And I love the understanding that it "isn't about Roy." And the Dickson City joke, cute! :)
Date: March 05, 2008 04:47 pm Title: Don't break.
My goodness, that was fine. Every single emotional note just pitch perfect. I stealth-read this at work and got so choked up, I knew there was no way I could leave a review, but I looked forward to coming home and reading it again.
This put a gigantic lump in my throat and turned the water works on:
“Like I wanted you to be on my team, almost, but I couldn’t tell you because it was just so bad and you were so…” she huffed and she flinched and she looked down at her feet, “just so good,” she breathed.
Did you hear that whimper from there?
Pam asking him if she was beautiful again just killed me and the line about them volleying their insecurities - so tender and vulnerable and sweet.
Then this just finished me off completely:
“I believe you,” he whispered between kisses, “I believe you.”
Oh Jim! He IS so good!
I'm so glad I waited one more day before emailing you, begging for another chapter! When you say "not that much" what I'm thinking is "plain and simple" in the best possible way writing can be, which means it IS a lot. Thank you so much for this and I just can't be that patient anymore, SG!
Date: March 05, 2008 02:39 pm Title: Don't think.
I have such a calm feeling after reading that. You enveloped what they both were needed so perfectly. Great Job!
Date: March 05, 2008 01:19 pm Title: Don't break.
Melts. It was tough to follow in a few places because of the formatting, but wow, you leveled me a few times.
"And I guess I was using you... I guess I did, but it wasn’t like what you think because I wasn’t using you for Roy, like to get back at Roy, you know?”
“I was using you for me ... because I didn’t know myself anymore. I didn’t know anything except for when I could… feel you." Wow. That just reduced Pam's crazy logic to a few sentences. And it made perfect sense.
“Thank you,” she mumbled, still chuckling, and he told her she was welcome. He meant that she could have whatever of him she wanted, she could steal from him his dignity and he would still want to hold her. This reminds me so much of "Such a dork" = "I love you"
This was almost what he wanted for her and it was almost romance and almost Hawaii and chocolate and candlelight. -- I really like how brought this idea full-circle. Don't take Jim's fairy tale away, he's waited for it long enough.
Nicely done, Stablergirl!
Author's Response: Thank you!! I tried to fix some of what I thought might be wrong with the formatting, just like the extra longness of the paragraphs. not sure it helped at all, but here's hoping. Thanks so much for letting me know what seemed extra Jim and Pam to you, I kill for this kind of review ;-) Not literally or anything, just...uh... right. You know what I mean.
10 [Report This]Date: March 05, 2008 01:15 pm Title: Don't break.
I was so glad to see this posted and like this version a lot. Even if I didn't feel totally great about every place you took us in this story, I love where you have arrived at. And of course it is always a pleasure to read your writing...your descriptive powers and the sense of dram you create are always amazing. Well done.
Author's Response: Thank you very much sir. You are a gentleman and a scholar. ;-) Glad you liked the destination if not the journey.
10 [Report This]Date: March 05, 2008 12:59 pm Title: Don't break.
I love this story. It is so different. Please have Pam go rip Roy a new one. He deserves it.
Author's Response: lol agreed.
Date: March 05, 2008 12:49 pm Title: Don't break.
Just perfect. It feels like all is nearly right with the world.
Author's Response: nearly. we are so close I can smell it ;-)
Date: March 04, 2008 08:28 am Title: Don't bend.
I actually really liked that chapter. I don't think it got darker at all. Pam finally woke the fuck up and took charge and I loved how she dealt with Roy. No need for a scene; he doesn't deserve that much emotional energy anymore.
10 [Report This]Date: February 29, 2008 08:04 pm Title: Don't bend.
More more more!! I am loving all of this. I really like the style this is written in. Keep it up!
Date: February 28, 2008 05:52 pm Title: Don't bend.
Yay for Pam feeling inspired to do something about her situation! Yay for Pam telling Roy the truth about what she knows and not taking his crap! And I thought you were going to end this chapter on a downer after the Poor Richard's scene, but now i have hope...
Also, just FYI, I noticed one teeny little typo: “I know what you've been diong,"