Date: May 22, 2008 10:15 am Title: sure of my lines, no one is there
Oh, this is SO good. I felt it all -- the heat and humidity, Pam's little frustrations and elations at work, the phone conversations that sometimes you want and sometimes you don't (ugh, I did LD for a summer and I remember getting to the point of "do we really have to talk more? I'm not missing you" -- even though I married the guy in the end). And so many details I can't pull them all out, except I liked that her Utica roommate had no sense of humor, I liked that Jim is too scared to take the subway, I liked her sticking pins into him, and I like that she's still the woman who will now see what's wrong and do something about it.
Author's Response: thank you for your thoughtful feedback! im really glad you liked it. one point that's important for me is that i think pam's 3 months in ny will be amazing for her - i predict FNB will become even fancier, due to being away and experiencing all that she will while on her own. i hope it makes her run outside in the rain and propose to him, or you know, similar :) i think transitions are hard, in general, whether you're going from being physically close to being far away, or vice versa. i said this before, but it's really about growing pains. it's a little sad but important. again, thank you!
Date: May 20, 2008 08:57 pm Title: sure of my lines, no one is there
This was absolutely wonderful!! I love how you've captured Pam's mixed emotions...lovely job :)
Author's Response: thank you!!
Author's Response: thank you!!
Date: May 19, 2008 07:05 pm Title: sure of my lines, no one is there
Guh, how did I miss this? Just lovely.
I hope Jim doesn't wait that long, but I can see how he might. Hell, it took him three years to tell Pam how he felt, he probably feels a bit snakebit right about now...
Author's Response: thank you! personally, i think jim's problem is that he loves spectacle and fireworks - literally. i think pam likes grand gestures too, but she also just loves him and wants to know where they stand. sept 25 is too far away!
Date: May 18, 2008 08:36 pm Title: sure of my lines, no one is there
Oh, lovely, lovely, lovely. So many good lines in here, but I think this is my favorite: Not surprisingly, he bleeds everywhere, all over her, and she sits on the floor in the hall, crying, simultaneously missing him and wishing he'd disappear. I really like the way you play with how Pam feels about Jim, about their relationship, about herself, and how it seems like it's going to work out but it's not like she doesn't have her doubts. Really nicely done!
Author's Response: thank you so much! this was great fun to craft, not only to put pam in nyc, but to stretch them and see how far they'd go. i think they've been through so much. i look at s3 and think, you all are going to get married soon? i think they have a lot of work to do, so i'd like to see more of the growing pains.
Date: May 18, 2008 03:13 pm Title: sure of my lines, no one is there
And, you're not listening. Pam, I cheated on you with Stanley. And Creed. And Meredith watched.
I laughed OUT LOUD when I read this. And I kind of hope that this is how it pans out in real life. And by real life I mean the actual show which is NOT real life. I must keep reminding myself.
Anyway, I think you're fantastic and I've read a lot of your stuff and it's great and true and props, etc.
Author's Response: oh yay! i love some good ole fashion LOLing. i hope it's something like this too. i don't even need them to be engaged - just - not broken. thank you so much for saying i'm fantastic! you can't see but i am blushing...
9 [Report This]Date: May 18, 2008 02:47 pm Title: sure of my lines, no one is there
Two from you, EL, and both so different. This was more the edgy EL that I'm accustomed to. Love how Jim is "HALPERT" in her phone. You're so good with little details.
Author's Response: i really thrive on the little stuff. btw, HALPERT was not my first choice, but i couldn't get into another nickname. what else might she call him???
Date: May 18, 2008 09:04 am Title: sure of my lines, no one is there
Oh my. How do you do that? Manage to convey both sadness and hope all in one paragraph. All the details are dead on: Pam finding a friendship plus flirting with a guy at school, picking a fight with Jim over Karen (When Pam realizes Karen has been ogling her bare left hand, she shivers like the ghosts of years past. *dies*) and that final scene, where Pam just goes "fuck it, I'm tired of waiting for other people to make me happy" and proposes to him. Just... love this so much. Probably THE best post-finale fics I've read thus far.
Author's Response:
bebitched, i love that you got it! bebitched ftw! as long as you're spotting details, i made multiple references to pam's hands (in a nod to the lack of ring) and i made sure pam was super focused on her work (ex. local ad). wow i feel like lostpedia now or something.
aw shucks. you're the best. thank you for the feedback :)
8 [Report This]Date: May 18, 2008 08:53 am Title: sure of my lines, no one is there
Loved, loved this line:
Not surprisingly, he bleeds everywhere, all over her, and she sits on the floor in the hall, crying, simultaneously missing him and wishing he'd disappear.
This is a beautiful story, excellent emotions and imagery...really well done.
Author's Response: thank you! so full disclosure: in college i traveled abroad for 3 months and being away from my girlfriend for that long was... really really hard. of course, years later, we barely remember what that was like, but i was able to muster up some of those feelings, and to me, it can sometimes feel like hate and love rolled into one. the feeling of: i miss you wholly but i'd be happy not to see you ever again. very confusing. thanks for your feedback!
Date: May 18, 2008 08:48 am Title: sure of my lines, no one is there
Oh, wow Emily. This really resonated with me - love how you portrayed the complexity of her feelings without overworking it. They're so vivid via subtle details, not lengthy explanations. And such great details - her thoughts about sticking Jim with a pin, her memory of Roy and the umbrella, so many more. And that last bit was especially lovely - the city heat and rain are so tactilely rendered that I could just see/feel her running down the street (and hooray for Fort Greene!) Then the simple reality of him obliterating all the doubts/fears that sort of metasticized in his absence...and them proposing to each other and...okay, clearly it effected me, lol. This is one of those fics that I read and think, dang - wish I'd thought of that!
Author's Response:
colette - thanks so much for the feedback. you know i love hearing from you.
i had a great time writing this, getting into pam's head, and letting feelings of confusion and love and conflict wash all over me. us? i think the most romantic things happen in the rain or in the heat, that's how i've always written, and it's probably repetitive but oh well :)
the proposal! you know, i'm kind of in a fight with jim. he practically lives with pam, he's had a ring for almost a whole year. what the hell is his problem??? propose! you don't need fireworks! i get what he's going for, and i think i understand why, but i can see pam thinking he's a little silly. and especially with 3 months on her own under her belt, i can see her wanting to do things a little differently. hence, proposing.
"This is one of those fics that I read and think, dang - wish I'd thought of that!"
Colette, now you know how I feel whenever I read your stories :) Seriously, thanks again for the feedback.
10 [Report This]Date: May 18, 2008 08:28 am Title: sure of my lines, no one is there
This is probably one of my favourite post-finale fics so far - if not my favourite. Absolutely lovely. I adore the imagery, the characterisations - her insecurities, and her pains, and her missing him and wanting him to disappear - and how when she sees him she's just happy and it's all in all pretty much one of the most gorgeous things I have ever read. Even the smallest characters have lovely details, and you see and feel so many things at once. You hurt for Pam while wanting to slap her into sense at the same time.
Even the last third, in the rain - I could almost smell it, along with her frustrations and his anxiety and - just - oh you have reduced me to talking crap. :D
I adored this, so much. Every single part of it. Gorgeous. Brilliant. I am going to read this again and again, I am sure of it. I wish I could just tell you how and why exactly I love it as much as I do - just know that I do.
Author's Response:
wow! what a compliment. there has been some really beautiful writing since thurs night, so i thank you.
i think being apart can be so difficult, especially when pam's never really gone away. i almost titled this: pam's spring break. because i think she'll go through a lot of changes and i wanted to reflect how difficult it is to be the leaver in a long-distance rship. i think most of it it's in one's mind, though, and i hope this fic showed that. that as difficult as it is to be apart, and maybe she even likes it, but at the end of the day she really loves jim, and that trumps all.
the end scene was really important to me. i'm glad you thought it worked.
this is such lovely feedback! thank you so much. i'm so flattered...