Date: September 02, 2008 11:26 pm Title: Chapter 3
Oh thanks for including pics of the Banshee! That place looks pretty awesome. Total Jim/Pam date place!
Date: September 02, 2008 11:07 pm Title: Chapter 2
oh you are the best! The thoughts, the DIALOGUE is just spot-on terrific. Looking forward to the next chapters!
Author's Response: Thanks so much! I'm so glad you're enjoying it!
9 [Report This]Date: September 02, 2008 07:39 pm Title: Chapter 1
wow!
amazing!!!
so in-character!
i love the transaction with karen and jim! so perfectly angsty!
Author's Response: Wow! Wow! Wow! Thanks so much, for your kind words and exclamation points! :)
8 [Report This]Date: September 02, 2008 05:41 pm Title: Chapter 4
**Sigh.
I love your version so far...keep it up!
I especially loved how Jim notices she's cold and gives her a hoodie. Absolutely great. That is so Jim.
Author's Response: Thanks! I've found any man worth his stuff keeps a hoodie on hand. :)
9 [Report This]Date: September 02, 2008 01:05 pm Title: Chapter 4
This chapter is really excellent, but two specific parts really resonated with me.
The first is the moment there at the beginning when she slips on Jim hoodie. The way you describe the tactile nature of that moment for Pam was excellent. (It reminded me of something sort of similar I wrote in one of my early stories where Jim goes to Pam's apartment for the first time and muses internally about the different sights and smells. /Mose story hour). So yeah, that was a great moment.
The other part that really stood out was this passage right here:
Because of me, Jim has thrown his entire life into a tailspin. He’s back at a job he can’t stand, and I’m assuming broken up from a girlfriend that he’d been happy with. I can’t feel good about that, no matter how much I want to be with him.
That's about the best perspective I've ever read on what Pam may have been thinking and feeling about all this.
Keep up the good work! We're lucky to have you as part of our little community here.
Author's Response: Well thank you, Mose! On your two notes...I've always found that there's something really intimate in borrowing/wearing a boyfriend's clothes for the first time...and in the Jim/Pam dynamic at that point in their history, it really would have been physically the closest they'd ever been. And as for the "tail spin" line...I think it's in Pam's nature that she would feel that guilt even while being happy. I guess I thought it reflected her growth in acknowledging HIS. I'm too happy to be a part of the MTT madness! :)
Date: September 02, 2008 07:37 am Title: Chapter 4
This is fabulous. I for one am NOT tired of the first-date thing. Maybe because I'm pretty new to this fanfic stuff. But wow - I am really enjoying it. Great job. I love how you write Pam.
Author's Response: Thanks, MCC! A little Pim date action never hurt anybody. :) And thanks for the compliment on "my" Pam...I always find Jim easier, as I find that my slightly boyish attitude toward romance and his ubersentimentality put us at pretty similar levels. :)
10 [Report This]Date: September 02, 2008 04:55 am Title: Chapter 4
This story consistently gives me chills, LC. I wish it were a novel so I could curl up with it and read for hours. “Pam…you’re my chance to be really happy. Just you.” He looks down for a second, then raises his eyes again. They’re bright with tears but he still has that smile. “It’s always been just you,” he says, his voice hoarse as his thumb strokes my knuckles. Beautiful. And, of course, you throw in the perfect touches of humor AND Blue Moon, my favorite beer (with an orange slice, of course) : )
Author's Response: So kind, Nan! Thanks! It's a little fluffier than I usually get, but I'm still a Pim-loving girl, dammit. :) And Blue Moon is pretty tasty...although lately I've become a fan of the Magic Hat. Ever tried it? Yum.
Date: September 01, 2008 08:55 am Title: Chapter 3
Just started your story. It's perfectly Jim and Pam crafted. The phone conversations are adorable. I love how you have written this. The Office writer's might want to contact you!! Thanks for sharing and keep it comin!
Author's Response: Wow, thank you! The writers are free to contact me anytime, but I promise you'd only be disappointed by the results. :)
Date: September 01, 2008 08:18 am Title: Chapter 3
Continue to love this story. I love how nervous Jim is to touch Pam. I do hope he conquers his fears though!
Author's Response: Thanks! Well, ONE of them better get it together soon, right? I think my profile gets deleted if I write a first date story that doesn't include some sort of Pim action... :)
Date: September 01, 2008 08:01 am Title: Chapter 1
Ok, i know i just commented like 5 seconds ago, but i went over to your ff.net page to see what you had over there, and i was reading your little questionnare thing, and you love disney world! i too am OBSESSED with disney world. anyhoo, that's all i wanted to say.
Author's Response: Well thanks for BOTH notes! I am both obsessively attentive to details and yes, obsessed with Disney World. Both are beyone help, but I'm glad I've found places online that are so accepting. :) Thanks for reading and reviewing!
Date: September 01, 2008 07:56 am Title: Chapter 1
This is a really, really great story. It somehow feels different from all the other first date stuff. I love the detail you put in, like we really get to see every aspect of the evening. I look forward to much much more.
Date: September 01, 2008 05:50 am Title: Chapter 2
oh squee! The phone conversations are twelve different kinds of adorable!!! And yay for Pam for not being naive. Good for her.
Author's Response: TWELVE different kinds of adorable? I was only aware of seven in the world, and only four of those are naturally occurring. I deserve a Nobel Prize...for fan fiction! :) Thanks so much and glad you're enjoying!
Date: August 31, 2008 10:05 pm Title: Chapter 3
I love that Jim's nervous and not at all sure. There's so much water under the bridge that the first date would HAVE to be a little bit awkward.
LOVED Pam's tell about the Sixers. That was such a cute moment and I hope Jim finds a way to press her on that later.
I'm really enjoying this and I can't wait to see what happens next!
Author's Response: Thanks Jenn! I absolutely agree...in my mind, at least, Jim and Pam are kind of...well, dorks, y'know? Awkward is their forte. And don't fret - the Sixers aren't done being mentioned (or abused. Hey, I'm a Pistons fan!). :)
10 [Report This]Date: August 31, 2008 06:22 pm Title: Chapter 3
Where have you been hiding all ths time, lady?! You show up on this site and hit one out of the park. Just favorited you and this story. I love your attention to detail (the comic book, the coaster, etc.). “Pam.” It's almost a whisper. I make myself meet her eyes. I nearly fell out of my chair. Can't wait for more!
Author's Response: Well Nan, I'm a bit on the short side in my chair o' wheels here, so hiding isn't really necessary... :) The real answer is I staked a place out at FF.net months ago but was too nervous to post here...and now I wonder why; you all have been so kind! Thanks for the reviews and the favoriting and gosh darnit, all of it!
Date: August 31, 2008 05:36 pm Title: Chapter 1
I love this story did you release this on fanfiction.net?
Author's Response: Thanks! Yes, this is indeed cross-posted...for awhile anything I post here can be found there completed, but I guess eventually I'll catch up. :)
9 [Report This]Date: August 31, 2008 04:28 pm Title: Chapter 1
What an awesome tone you've captured here, fun and nervous and eager. Love that Jim chickened out touching her at the end. And saved the coaster, of course....how perfect. Next chapter promises to be lots of fun!
Author's Response: Thanks Callisto! You know Jim and his souvenirs. :) Glad you're enjoying the story thus far and I hope you stay tuned for more!
10 [Report This]Date: August 31, 2008 03:26 pm Title: Chapter 3
Yay! Congratulations on your blue ribbon, Little Comment - it is well deserved. I love this story. I love how Jim is so nervous about touching her or saying too much - that really rings true because I can totally see him feeling that way after all they'd been through up until this point. I can't wait to see what happens next. Moonlight walk in the park? Sounds romantic......
Author's Response: Thanks Kells! I am honored...and yet confused, as I don't really know what a blue ribbon is for. My hubby and I speculated that when I wasn't watching this story headed to the county fair and raised a prize cow. Is that it? :) Anyway, thanks for your kind words...having been in a similar situation myself years ago I've always felt like this nervousness and awkwardness would reign supreme. I hope you'll be pleased by what comes next!
Date: August 31, 2008 03:10 pm Title: Chapter 3
Hey, nothing wrong with another first date fic. At this point, anything is good to help pass the time before the next season starts, right? :D
Seriously, though, I really am enjoying the tone of this piece. I like the first person narrative you've got going, and the alternating POVs of Jim and Pam. i think you've got a really good grasp on the characters, and it's really refreshing to read something so nicely crafted. Good job, and can't wait for more!
Author's Response: Gosh Mose...me AND anything help pass the time? I'm touched. :) Thanks for such a kind review! Like I've said before, I know first peson present tense isn't an approach everyone digs, but for this story I felt like it fit - that's how it started coming out and so I ran with it. I do hope you'll enjoy the rest! :)
Date: August 31, 2008 11:58 am Title: Chapter 2
Really great job of capturing Pam's nervousness before the big date! Looking forward to the next update!
Author's Response: Thanks! I know she's FNB and all, but she had to have the jitters. :) Update coming soon!
10 [Report This]Date: August 31, 2008 09:30 am Title: Chapter 1
This is absolutely wonderful, and I cannot wait to read more, STAT! Stat means now!
Really, this is a great story and I'm loving the two points of view.
Author's Response: Thanks a lot! I know people can either love or hate that whole first person present voice, but I gave it a try and I'm so glad you enjoy it thus far. :)
5 [Report This]Date: August 30, 2008 09:36 pm Title: Chapter 2
Awwww, this is such a great story! This is one of the best first date fics that I've read, seriously. Can't wait for the next chapter!
Author's Response: Wow and gosh golly! I'm not sure what to say other than thanks so much! I hope I don't Schrute it! :)
Date: August 30, 2008 07:31 pm Title: Chapter 2
This story is so sweet, and I'll be following it!
Author's Response: Thanks a lot - hope you'll enjoy!
8 [Report This]Date: August 30, 2008 07:06 pm Title: Chapter 2
"After everything Jim and I have been through in the past year, the two of us ever being together was about as unlikely as…well, something very unlikely."
What a cute line. And I love their bantering - you truly have their voices down pat and it is so much fun to read. Can't wait for the actual date!
Author's Response: Thanks! I always enjoy, on the show, when Pam - despite being bright and articulate - gets herself tripped up...usually when it involves Jim. :) Thanks too for your kind compliment re: capturing their voices...I sure try!
8 [Report This]Date: August 30, 2008 06:50 pm Title: Chapter 1
I could read first date stories every day and never tire of them, especially when they are as well written as this one is. I liked your version of the break-up, and I also liked your backstory as to what Jim was thinking between Beach Games and The Job. Great job!
Author's Response: Whew! Thanks...you know, I think the first date stories are interesting too, just because I think it says a lot about how you see Pim (sorry, I avoid that J-word)...Hope you continue to enjoy!
Date: August 30, 2008 12:32 pm Title: Chapter 2
Psssht - I don't care if everyone else wrote it! I can't get enough of first day lurrrve. Thanks for putting it out there -- it's well-done and I can't wait to see more.
Author's Response: Well thanks, MCC...I, in turn, will continue bringing it to you then! :)