Date: December 13, 2020 02:00 pm Title: Epilogue: Long After June
I neglected to review this the first time I read it, so I’ll just sum up here:
I do love this general concept of an external force bringing them back together in this moment where they just couldn’t quite get over themselves enough to do it.
You have, as always, done a great job with Larissa – you’ve really defined this character for me. I love the bond you form under pressure between her and Pam here, and the way her similarities with Jim consistently help her bridge the gap with someone who should be a near stranger. It tells you a lot about Larissa, Pam, Jim, and Jim and Pam’s relationship all at once. And the two different perspectives on Larissa’s fall out of the tree are both well-conceived and well-executed.
Also, Jim’s questions for Helene were genius.
The story of them reuniting is just lovely. The hi-hey exchange did not go unnoticed. I love this newly confident Pam immediately progressing to wise-assing Jim and them recovering their banter and the two of them finding ways to completely throw each other off as they feel their way through a new relationship.
You have a really strong sense of Pam and how she sees the world as the artist Jim has always seen her as, and the way at this crucial moment her sense of herself is changing. The choice to have Pam communicate through her medium instead of giving a big speech was a smart one, and it paid off. Similarly, you did some strong character development with Jim through his interludes, which were really creatively written.
And I really enjoyed your description of the way they impact and change each other – Jim making her the realest version of herself, the way their images of each other are different from the rest of the world’s because they’re different together. The touch about how they’re finally able to be themselves without everything else hanging over them was a good note to add.
Anyhow, this is a high-quality example of hospital fic. Well done.
Author's Response: So I am months behind on replying to your reviews (sorry--but thanks for the reviews!). I really appreciate this detailed feedback on this story in particular. Larissa is one of my favorite characters to write, so I'm so glad that you find my version of her meaningful. This was one of my favorite stories to write precisely because of what I was able to do with Pam as an artist, so I really appreciate you responding to that part of it. Thanks so much!
Date: November 27, 2020 04:59 pm Title: Interlude: In Jim's Head
These quick impressions are a wonderful way to convey Jim's current status. I took as long to read and savor each tidbit as I would a 78 word paragraph trying to describe it. Not everything has to conform to paragraph narrative.
Sometimes less IS more.
Author's Response: Thank you so much! It was hard to write those, so I'm glad they worked for you!
Date: February 17, 2020 01:55 pm Title: Epilogue: Long After June
I love this story! It started pretty darkly, but I smiled and laughed so many times during the reading. I sometimes wondered what Fem!Jim would look like - and you showed us Larissa! She's a fantastic character and their mutual banter both with Jim and Pam - lovely!
I also like the decisions Pam and Jim made, even if they seemed quite tough. Leaving DM, leaving Scranton - these locations became so significant part of them that sometimes it seemed (for me, at least) weird to imagine them somewhere else (I know about the happenings in season 9, but I didn't watch it and happily ignore it). But it was for the best, and I genuinely enjoy your story. Thank you!
Author's Response: Thank you! This is probably the story I wrote that I'm proudest of, so I really appreciate your feedback on it. I also ignore S9, so thanks for being willing to let me also take them out of Scranton in the fic. :)
Date: April 28, 2019 12:03 pm Title: June 10: Pam's Apartment
Just finished reading this for the second time. So well done. It just amazes me the creativity that you throw into the AU for this storyline.
Author's Response: Thank you! I really enjoyed writing it, and I'm always delighted to hear from people who read it (and especially who read it more than once; I'm flattered!).
Date: February 25, 2019 10:16 am Title: June 11: The Same, Continued
That last line was the death of me. So lovely!
Although I would've liked Larissa to get tactfully out of the room and give Pam time to explain. Then again, it sound much like her to stick around and see it happening.
Author's Response: Thanks! Yeah, that's the fine line between being true to the character I've written and indulging my own JAM interests. Don't worry, explanations happen. Fluff occurs. All will be well, even without Larissa watching (and with her too).
Date: February 25, 2019 09:03 am Title: June 11: An Awakening
Awww, my heart! So beautifully done!
Author's Response: Aww, thanks! So glad you decided to read this, and that you're enjoying it.
Date: February 25, 2019 08:39 am Title: June 11: The Cafeteria
Right back at you, Halpert. I love it when Pam finds her voice and uses it :)
Author's Response: That's my favorite part of writing AU: I get to make Pam do that. Thanks for reviewing!
Date: February 25, 2019 06:29 am Title: June 10-11: Relaxation Room
I keep forgetting to review, which is a sign of how good this fic is. I love Larissa's blunt honesty, so unlike her dork of a brother. And I like to imagine Pam feeling it a little bit like a slap, but so necessary at this point.
Great work!
Author's Response: Thanks! I'm really glad you're reading it; it has given me occasion to look back at it, and besides the typos I'm finding (oops) it's really nice to see these things again with fresher eyes. Thanks for the comment on Larissa too; I was kinda worried about her as a character so that's nice to hear.
Date: February 25, 2019 04:29 am Title: June 10: At the Hospital
Hi! So, I finally landed here! Loving it so far. I haven't reviewed the other two chapters because I was too into the story. I love how at first Larissa calls Pam "Anderson". Looking forward to the next chapter.
Author's Response:
Hi! Glad to have you! I appreciate your noticing that point; I had fun putting it in.
Date: January 07, 2019 05:02 pm Title: Epilogue: Long After June
Man! I'm so sad this is over. This story has been an adventure for me for the last two days.
Though I have been procrastinating homework (I do that well), so I guess I should be grateful I finished when I did.
Thank you for writing this!! It is a very beautiful story and was very well written. Thank you for sticking with it!
Author's Response: Thank you! I really appreciate the feedback. I try very hard to make sure every WIP I do gets finished, though I can never promise anything, but this one in particular was a joy from start to finish. I'm glad you enjoyed it!
Date: January 07, 2019 10:08 am Title: June 11: The Same, Continued
Wonderful story so far! You're doing a fantastic job building up tension and I'm so happy that Pam had the courage to tell him. Can't wait to read the next chapter. I'm in class though so it may have to wait....
Author's Response: Thank you! And thanks for reading! It's great to hear feedback--and don't worry, the chapter will be there once you get back from class ;)
Date: August 04, 2018 08:38 am Title: June 10: Still in Jim's Room
Really fantastic chapter. I think you hit Larissa’s assessment of her own opinion of Pam on the head. Great stuff and nice ending with shared interests.
Author's Response: Thanks! I really enjoyed writing that one, so this is nice to ear.
Date: July 24, 2018 07:20 pm Title: Epilogue: Long After June
Oh man, everyone at the office was perfectly in character - from Kelly's highlighter colors to the Finer Things Club sending Pam off with the perfect gift.. that was a great touch!
I'll forgive you for the Karen thing ONLY because that's literally the only red mark I could put on this story.
You did good, Comfect. This story start to finish was an absolute joy to read, filled with all of the emotions. Definitely deserving of all of the jellybeans! Thank you for sharing this with all of us!
Author's Response:
Thanks! I appreciate your forgiveness; I always felt like if they hadn't had Jim hanging over them Pam and Karen might actually have been good friends. They both like making fun of Jim for instance ;). And especially if Jim had come to Stamford dating Pam, I think Pam would have jumped at the chance to make an actual friend. But I can see why it would be a red flag for you.
And more broadly, thanks for your feedback throughout this story. It has been fun writing for you.
Date: July 24, 2018 07:15 pm Title: June 13: After Dinner
This chapter had me grinning the entire time. Thank goodness for that Impala, eh?
I appreciate Betsy and Gerald teaming up with Larissa for a bit of teasing Jim, the family dynamic continues to make me happy.
Author's Response: Thanks! I feel like a good family should be fun to write--and the Halperts definitely were.
Date: July 24, 2018 07:12 pm Title: June 13: Dinner
I'm with Larissa on the pointlessness of white pizzas, not going to lie. I loved seeing the difference between the Andersons and the Halperts and Pam recognizing that she deserved better than she had before.
Pam and Jim continue to be sassy...I love it!
Author's Response: Larissa and I may also agree on that point. And yeah, I feel like the Pam-Roy's (and -Jim's) family dynamic is underexplored in the show, so I decided I could make of it what I wanted.
Date: July 24, 2018 07:04 pm Title: June 13: The Same, Continued
Don't get me wrong, I love Pam and Jim of course but Jim and Larissa's relationship is the MVP of this chapter. They're so good to each other! "I'm sorry I didn't catch you"... That exchange at the end made me smile.
Author's Response: Thank you. One of the points of this fic was to make a Larissa that felt like she fit in with the main cast, so this is wonderful to hear.
Date: July 24, 2018 07:01 pm Title: June 13: Jim's Room (non-ICU)
The Halperts seem like a good time all around! Glad to see they're not being cold to Pam, given what they last knew about her.
Author's Response: I just can't see the people who raised Jim being cold people. Plus I figure Larissa's been feeding them information in the background...
Date: July 24, 2018 07:00 pm Title: June 13: Leaving the Relaxation Room
oh boy, Jim and Pam getting sassy with their flirting! I like it.
Author's Response: Thanks! By the way Coley, I love these review-bombs of yours. They're really refreshing.
Date: July 22, 2018 02:40 pm Title: Epilogue: Long After June
Good way to end it. Thank you for sharing this. It was a lot of fun to see the development of the characters through this lens.
Author's Response: Thanks. I've really appreciated your feedback along the way.
Date: July 22, 2018 09:07 am Title: Epilogue: Long After June
The bad thing is that I was (am) insanely busy lately and haven’t had as much time to read as I would have liked. The good thing is that I had like ten chapters of this to binge read. I especially especially LOVED the epilogue, but really I loved it all. You gave life to characters that we don’t know in a really organic and believable way. Don’t apologize for this being long—I’m so happy to have it! Wonderful job as always, and I’m excited to read what comes next for you!
Author's Response: Well I'm really glad you caught up! Thanks for reading, and for the feedback along the way. Looking forward to having you back here on the site (hopefully updating your own fics... XD).
Date: July 22, 2018 01:02 am Title: Epilogue: Long After June
Why not give Jim a six-figure paycheck?? 😂
Can't believe this is actually the end! I love this story and thought it was really well-written and thought out! Thank you-- I hope you write other fics in the future xoxo
Author's Response: Why not indeed? And thanks! It's been a long while (at almost 2 full months this is the longest of my fics in time as well as words) so thanks for reading along!
Date: July 19, 2018 06:25 pm Title: June 13: After Dinner
I loved the "an entire Chevy Impala to the ribs? Consider it done." Great way to add in a bit of humor that way. It's lovely the way things are wrapping up like this.
Author's Response: Thanks! I quite enjoyed that line.
Date: July 18, 2018 06:08 pm Title: June 13: Dinner
Lots of great fun all around. Pam's fitting in nicely and it's wonderful to see the back and forth they have.
Author's Response: Gracias! I have enjoyed writing these family dynamics, I'm glad they've worked for you.
Date: July 17, 2018 06:22 am Title: June 13: The Same, Continued
Nice chapter to see some of the Halpert family dynamic. Good to see Jim so well taken care of.
Author's Response: Thanks! Writing four Halperts is hard for me (I expect their senses of humor to be similar, which makes distinguishing them hard) so I appreciate hearing that the dynamic is working for you. Jim has a loving family, I think, so this felt like an important chapter to show that.
Date: July 15, 2018 12:59 am Title: June 13: Jim's Room (non-ICU)
Classic Heisenberg's Uncertainty Principal right there 😂
Author's Response: Heh :)