1 [Report This]Date: September 13, 2021 01:20 pm Title: Of ashes cooling
I really like the choice to tie Pam's canonical interest in noise to her connection of quiet with loneliness - as someone who it seems like went from living with her parents to living in the dorms to living with Roy (or maybe just straight from her parents to Roy), the quiet of living alone would hit different.
I really appreciate the note of compassion for Karen here, and that Pam, at least, understands how hard a blow this will be for her. You made some interesting choices here in general, acknowledging that at this point in Pam's journey there's a lot to work through, and she maybe hasn't made the progress she'll make by the end of Season 3 that will allow her to just dive into things with Jim. A fix-it fic with a realist twist!
1 [Report This]Date: September 13, 2021 01:15 pm Title: Of fire scorching
"She’d probably bleed to death if she stayed any longer." Really poetic, and it feels like it makes it really emotionally clear why Pam would lapse back into Roy.
Oooof, Roy. The particular timing of his screw-up works out for Jam here, but the reality is he was always that guy, and over a long enough timeline he was bound to remind Pam of that eventually. Nice to see Pam showing some anger at him here, feels like we never really got that in canon.
"She drove home, and no tear was shed. It was just the streetlights that were blurrier than ever." Well. Thank you for not leaving it at that. What a gut-punch of an ending.
1 [Report This]Date: August 16, 2020 09:00 am Title: Of ashes cooling
I understand why you say it's done, but if you later decided you wanted to show what actually, maturely, fixing it would look like, I wouldn't mind. It's nice to see Pam working out of despair without jumping straight to elation. Well done.
Author's Response: Thank you so much, Comfect, I truly appreciate your feedback. I'd like to write something like that in the future, but for now, I don't think I'm skillful enough (or mature myself) to make this story realistic and complete.
1 [Report This]Date: August 16, 2020 08:56 am Title: Of fire scorching
That last line is excellent. I liked the whole thing (this show could use more honesty!). But the last line was killer.
Author's Response: Thank you! I'm glad you like it!
1 [Report This]Date: August 07, 2020 01:19 am Title: Of ashes cooling
You know how much I love a Season 3 fix-it! This broke my heart in all the best ways. And then mended it again. I adore how you had Pam say that they needed to be friends again first. Her sympathy for Karen was also so very endearing. I’m so glad you added this second chapter!
Author's Response:
Thank you very much, Jenna! I'm sorry this story tested your heart, but I'm glad it's okay now :)
1 [Report This]Date: August 06, 2020 04:47 pm Title: Of ashes cooling
So lovely, thank you for giving a part two to wrap this up nicely! I especially liked that you acknowledge the distance that has grown between them and pam wanting to mend it.
Well done, looking forward to your next work!
Author's Response:
Thank you, DG! I'm glad you liked it.
And I'm currently working on the next chapter of 'Paradox' ;)
1 [Report This]Date: August 06, 2020 04:39 pm Title: Of fire scorching
Omg! This needs and doesn't need a second chapter, which I realise is already there. I LOVE angry Pam.
Author's Response: Thank you, Kuri! I love her too, and that's why this fix-it was born :)
1 [Report This]Date: August 06, 2020 04:22 pm Title: Of ashes cooling
I really loved this, because it’s so realistic. They don’t just immediately fall into happily ever after, they acknowledge that relationships take work and communication and that they have stuff to figure out before they can have a relationship. And I am SO PROUD OF PAM! This was excellent, Dernhelm, thank you for sharing it with us!
Author's Response: Thank you, BT! I'm excited that I both kept it realistic and gave Pam some justice... hope she wasn't very much OOC :)
1 [Report This]Date: August 06, 2020 09:01 am Title: Of ashes cooling
Excellent follow-up chapter. As much fun as it would be to have the big fluffy finally together scene, that would have been the wrong tone for this one.
You nailed it though. After all the huge angry emotions of last time, this really rings true. When Pam says he doesn't know her anymore, that's probably one of the best moments of honesty I've ever read from Pam in a fic.
I'll admit you did have me going a few times. More than once I was worried Pam was going to kick him out leaving them both fractured husks of themselves. However not so there in the end. I love that she wants to be with him, but first wants to mend their relationship. Great sign of maturity. Also that Jim so readily agrees. They've both turned a corner and it's really nice to see.
Thanks for this add on. It added a lot of depth to the previous chapter.
Author's Response: Thank you so much, Warrior, for your amazing review! It made my evening. And I'm glad that this chapter turned out to be in the mood and fitted the story well.
1 [Report This]Date: August 04, 2020 06:47 am Title: Of fire scorching
I love this!!! Yes pleeeeease do another chapter I'd be so excited
Author's Response: Thank you, Purplepapaya! I can promise that there will be the second part.
1 [Report This]Date: August 02, 2020 10:46 pm Title: Of fire scorching
Yes, more!!!
Author's Response: Thanks, Merria!
1 [Report This]Date: August 02, 2020 02:09 pm Title: Of fire scorching
This was so good! I love angry, angsty Pam! I also love that Jim was the one to show up while her and Roy were fighting, because who else would? Loveddd it! I'd also love a second chapter with hopefully a brighter ending but nothing wrong with leaving us with just some angst every now and then.
Author's Response: Thank you, Aly! I'm glad you like this story and I hope you'll enjoy the second part when it'll be ready :)
1 [Report This]Date: August 02, 2020 12:20 pm Title: Of fire scorching
Wow Angry Pam here. That's one helluva way to get her to a tipping point. That she reams out both Roy and Jim is great for her in this moment. Good for you Pam. Stand on your own feet, really let people know what your feeling, more power to you.
This works well as a one-shot. I can see several ways this could go if you continue it. Jim showing up at Pam's apartment after breaking up with Karen, with or without black-eye courtasy of a drunken Roy after Karen screams at Jim about The Kiss, neither of those happening and Pam starts acting cold to Jim at the office. Personally if you do continue it I would like the Jim shows up without the black-eye but that's from my irredeemable JAM loving heart.
However it's also your story. It's great as is, but there's clearly potential for more.
Author's Response:
Thank you, Warrior! And thank you for your suggestions, I'd like to read some of these fics if someone wrote them, because the ideas are lovely.
I think, as soon as I figure out The Talk (or The Speech), I'll add the second part.
1 [Report This]Date: August 02, 2020 07:16 am Title: Of fire scorching
Such a silly question, always Dernhelm, we always need more chapters!
You captured the raw emotion here really well, and I can totally see Pam not sticking around to let Jim get a word in edgewsie after the night she's had and the mistake that she realised she was about to make. Great work as always!
I look forward to your next work, whether that is the teased next chapter, or something else!
Author's Response: Thanks, DG! I'm really glad you like my stories. And there will definitely be the second part!
Date: August 02, 2020 05:17 am Title: Of fire scorching
It definitely needs a second chapter! I do wish things might have gone this way that night. Please continue.
Author's Response: Thank you, Donna! I'm working on it :)
1 [Report This]Date: August 02, 2020 05:10 am Title: Of fire scorching
I doesn’t neeeed a second chapter but it’s so good that I really want one! I loved how strong Pam was here and it was so satisfying to see her turn Roy down haha. This could be the end but I would love to see more of it! Great work!
Author's Response: Thank you, Jim-jams! I love strong Pam too... that was the main reason I wrote this story :)
1 [Report This]Date: August 02, 2020 04:39 am Title: Of fire scorching
“She’d probably bleed to death if she stayed any longer.” So, so angsty and so, so good.
“He just didn’t know. He didn’t know that she’d spent weeks picking a color scheme for their wedding” This is perfect. This is Roy all over. I can see this actually being the catalyst for Pam to change her mind about going with Roy. It makes all the sense in the world.
“The false feeling of being needed fleeted away and left an acidic taste on her tongue.” This is pure poetry. What a lovely bit of writing.
Please, please, please write a second chapter! You could end it here, deep in the darkness of angst, but I’d love to see you bring us the light at the end of the tunnel!
Author's Response: Thank you so much, Jenna! I already have a half-written second part, so I hope there will be an update soon. So far, though, it's just more angst, but I don't like to finish my stories like that, so, I hope, there will be some silver lining...