This is excellent. Karen is such an underdeveloped character on the show, but you've managed to flesh her out really well, and everything meshes with the few things we actually do know about her. I love how you can see her feelings for Jim sort of chipping away at her confidence and happiness, similar to how Jim's feelings for Pam chipped away at him. And I love how....quiet this was, for lack of a better word- no big fights or sob sessions, just a gradual realization. And this: She's decided, after one very luke-warm month in Scranton, that she is too smart, too strong, too independent to be strung along.

So, so true. If only Show!Karen did this.

8

Loved it.

10

I thought it was perfect.  (: you did a fantastic job.

8

You accomplished the impossible - I actually felt sorry for Karen here. On a technical note, I liked the repetition/variation at the end of each section break

9

I adored this one. It's such a cool perspective, seeing them from Karen's point of view, seeing how she realizes little by little what she doesn't have with Jim that he shares with Pam. And the hands! Oh, the intertwined fingers. That was perfect. Fantastically symbolic, and I love that it was THAT one thing that set off all the alarm bells in her head.

10

Oh, so well written! Karen is such an interesting character, and you brought her to life. Good job!

Author's Response:

McGigi, thank you.  I can't hate her, not that I want to, but I totally think she should date Toby, or something.  Anyone?

10

Well if this isn't freaking perfect. Your Karen seems absolutely spot-on [especially for something you weren't comfortable doing?]; she's real and true and completely human, and this story makes me love her but still dislike Karen/Jim [not that that last bit was really necessary...] so this is definitely one of the best I've seen out there.

And I love your Karen, by the way. She's so painfully real. It's amazing how you got so much across which such little dialogue, like how she feels about him and what she thinks about herself, all of that. I would never see Karen as an overly sappy, drippy girl who chases after guys she may like and compromises herself for them, and I think even the guys she likes have to be special, and somehow you went a little against that as well as support that notion entirely, so that's brilliant. And I love that the thing that made Karen realise it was Pam Jim was in love with was how he held her hand, because
a) Karen's not daft, and
b) I love the idea of that, comparing the way he held their hands to figure that out.
I seriously cannot say how much I love this Karen. It's a darker take on her character in general; I really do think she has some sort of a background like that, although the writers will probably never explore that. As much as I want her out of the way, it kind of breaks my heart a little, and my heart doesn't break that easily. Really.

And how we got to see Jim and Pam become Jim/Pam through the eyes of Karen, as much as she wanted to ignore it, was great, too.

Also: the way you wrote this!! It's so Karen I feel unbelievably sad for this girl. The way she kept at guessing at the kind of girl Jim loved [and got it entirely wrong, which should say something about how much she's meant to be with him] and kind of changed herself, for him - I adored the way you finished off each section, how every time she becomes less and less like herself, she becomes less and less certain that she's the person who'd make him happy. The sentence you used, it's the kind of thing I'd do, except people don't get it that much or they don't point it out, and that makes me feel disappointed, so I figured I would point out that I noticed [!] and I absolutely love it.

She sits down at the table and pours her licorice pieces out onto a paper towel, lining them up like little corn syrup soldiers.
Hee!

There are so many other things that I loved about this story, but I'm stopping here in case others've mentioned it already; I'd just be repetitive and uhm...really long and rambley. But awesome stuff, seriously and genuinely. I would love to read more of your stuff.

10

It feels like a thick barrier, suddenly, and when she tries to tangle her fingers with his, he pulls his hand away and places it on the small of her back, instead.

Like her or hate her, you gotta feel for Karen there.  

Beautifully written.  Your vivid descpriptions of the awkward and uncomfortable moments these characters share are spot on.  

And Creed would totally ask for Karen's panties. :) 

This is a great characterization of Karen, and a scenario with her dating Jim that I can almost stomach -- "if Jim dates someone else, it's still all about Pam" or something to that effect.

And all the pieces of the wall Jim has built around himself -- so true, so painfully true! 

He kisses her in a way that makes her feel like someone else, like she's just... more than herself, and she's not sure if that's a good or a bad thing, but it always feels perfect.

Such a good sentence. It makes you go "Aw, honey. NO! Bad thing!"

Anyway, great story. Made me like Karen but not Karen/Jim, so, exactly right. 

10

I love how you were able to express so much with so little dialogue and I really thought your Karen was spot on.  I like how she tried to figure out what the other woman was like and then tried to be more like what she thought she was (big words to prove her intelligence), while at the same time seemily losing confidence in herself. And the part about intertwining fingers while holdings hands - what an awesome way to convey closeness, or lack thereof!  Very, very well done.

10

Wait... WHAT?  That ending just had me squeal and scream out loud. 

 It has nothing to do with Dwight's total power over the band aids and nothing to do with walking in (after hours) on Jim and Pam going at it on the couch next to reception.  She just really needs a change.

I think I just about LOST it there.  That was ... WHAT?  That whole paragraph was just amazing and true and then I got to that and I was like, "Oh ... my ..."  and I think I just about lost it all.  Nice.

Also, I just wanted to mention that sometimes I write something and I just know it's great and I can't wait to hear someone say something about it.  I don't know if this was one of the lines for you, but I just loved this:

She sits down at the table and pours her licorice pieces out onto a paper towel, lining them up like little corn syrup soldiers.

And then she spells "JIM."  HA!  I loved that part.  I think that was my favorite part of the story.  

I loved your Karen.  She wasn't bad or mean or weird, she was just real, she was a real, true person ... wondering what it was that Jim was really hiding and imagining WHO that might be and being surprised at that person being Pam and that is so true, for real.  Really nice job.  I liked this story a lot.