6 [Report This]Date: April 23, 2007 06:35 am Title: It's what you do to me.
I liked this, but I really don't think Jim would listen to Plain White T's. I unfortunately ended up at a concert of theirs and I'm pretty sure there was no-one there over 16. And is he listening to a mixed tape or the radio?
Date: April 23, 2007 05:52 am Title: It's what you do to me.
And now he was right back where he’d started…silently wanting her…quietly worshipping her, and it had all happened in like literally four hours.
Okay, it has to happen in less than four hours - there are only 4 shows left!
Seriously, though - I'm enjoying this. I love the description of the CD case.
Date: April 23, 2007 05:22 am Title: It's what you do to me.
I like that you gave us Pam's backstory with her father - when I write her, I imagine apects from her past that inform her behavior, and it's really interesting to see your version fleshed out on the page. Also - great job at making Jim's feelings so palpable - his frustration/anger, then in this chapter, his acknowledgement of how much he still loves her and how quickly that re-emerged, despite everything. Pam's glimpse of high school Jim was particularly touching (loved the mention of Yoo-hoo - perfect.) Looking forward to more.
Date: April 22, 2007 10:53 pm Title: Phantom Bruises
This is a great story. I'm really loving the way this is bringing them together. And although it's sad that Pam's dad was such a jerk, it really does explain a lot about how she deals with the men she loves. I think Jim is the first man she's loved who really wanted her to be herself and contribute to the friendship, and maybe that's why it's been so hard for her to accept that she loves him. Well, look at me psychoanalyze! ;)
Great story. I look forward to reading more.
Author's Response: lol yes! I love it. the psychoanalysis (spelling?) is right on target with what I imagined ;-) thanks for reviewing! keep reading and let me know how you like it.
Date: April 22, 2007 07:37 pm Title: Phantom Bruises
I am officially IN LOVE with this story! Keep it coming please!
Date: April 22, 2007 07:30 pm Title: Fathers, be good to your daughters.
WOW. I do not think anyone has ever fully captured why Pam might be the way that she is and I just have to say that the world you've created her is completely and totally possible. The paradox of her father having had little to do with who she became and yet EVERYTHING to do with who she became is just brilliant. It makes complete sense why she would have ended up with someone like Roy and how it has been almost impossible for her to accept someone like Jim who want to convince her that it DOES matter what she feels. Again I say WOW. This is genius.
Author's Response: ok can I just say that your review is so great and wonderfully timed. I actually re-wrote this chapter today and took it in a completely different direction because it has been pointed out to me that Pam's relationship with her father was in reality not anything like what I wrote. However I was reluctant to post the change because I was so attatched to the chapter that I already had and the choices I had made. I've decided to keep what I have. Thanks so much for reviewing ;-)
Date: April 22, 2007 07:05 pm Title: He was just Jim
awww....his "hang in there Beesly" almost brought tears to my eyes!!! Ugh, I'm so loving this story! So happy you posted so many chapters! moving on...
10 [Report This]Date: April 22, 2007 04:53 pm Title: Phantom Bruises
This story is so emotionally tangible, I really adore it. I love what you've done with the inner monologues of both characters and I especially liked the chapterwhere Pam recalls her father's presence in her life. This really is so beautiful, I can't wait for more.
Author's Response: Thank you! Like I said to LoveFool, I rewrote the chapter about pam's father today...but because of the response I've gotten to it since I last checked the reviews I'm giong to keep it as is!! Thank you so much!!!!! Keep reading ;-)
Date: April 22, 2007 01:31 pm Title: Phantom Bruises
Don't you dare leave out this chapter. What are you thinking?
I personally would leave out the math analogy. I say that knowing that it's your chapter title. But seriously, even though some of us do apply math to the weirdest things in our lives, most of us don't tell people about it or use it in normal speech. ("Your story is so awesome, it's like a solved quadratic equation." Heehee.) Specifically, Jim has never said a darn thing about math that I recall, so it seems out of character for him. Admit it, you're just a math geek looking for an outlet. I am so on to you.
There are so many good things about this chapter. Phantom bruises, "help me", Jim taking control with the suitcase and the car. I'm so happy she's letting him help and he's doing the right thing. It's as good as an equilateral triangle, or a perfect circle. (HA! Should I use math in all my reviews? No? Okay.)
Author's Response: lol I'll rework it just for you. check back, no joke. ;-)
Date: April 22, 2007 01:16 pm Title: Fathers, be good to your daughters.
Bad dad! Bad dad! I'm hoping the cool mom who showed up in Sexual Harassment didn't marry this guy, but it could certainly explain why Pam was kind of a doormat for Roy.
Well written, even though I don't like this dad! All dads should be awesome, like mine.
10 [Report This]Date: April 22, 2007 01:10 pm Title: Phantom Bruises
Readable? Of course. I am just eating up everything that you post! I'm sad that there will be a break before you post again, but also glad, because I have papers due and finals to take at school. But please do post more. This is far too good to desert!
Author's Response: lol i hear you, I have so much to be doing right now and instead I'm glued to my keyboard ;-) I'll try to keep with it, thanks for the reviews!
Date: April 22, 2007 12:18 pm Title: Phantom Bruises
Quite nice :)
Date: April 22, 2007 11:52 am Title: Phantom Bruises
Very sweet. Very them, for them to communicate so awkwardly and then get the important stuff settled with hardly any words at all.
Author's Response: Thank you! Please keep reading and let me know what you think.
Date: April 22, 2007 09:15 am Title: Phantom Bruises
i will admit jim's twist on if p then q is a lot more interesting than trying to prove some stupid convoluted statement like fog is green and peas are orange and then the planet is a rectangle. and to top it all of, a really interesting theory
and i am so glad pam allowed herself to accept his help.
Date: April 22, 2007 09:10 am Title: Fathers, be good to your daughters.
two notes on the chapter titles also: i love daughters by john mayer. it gets tuck in my head. and also, "if p, then q" brings back scary memories from logic class. worst. teacher. ever.
poor pam with a father like that. i think that explains a lot about roy, and yeah, about her relationships. (and why jim is perfect for her!!)
Date: April 22, 2007 09:06 am Title: And so she grew
i dunno if i consider this angst. i think its more drama. or maybe i am just splitting hairs.
(and haha! yes, SVU is an awesome show).
Eh, maybe slightly angst. but i still say drama. and i don't mind. i enjoy agnst also. and fluff. i enjoy most.
and, i really really like pam in this chapter. i can't really say exactly what it is, but i do.
Date: April 22, 2007 09:00 am Title: Nice of you to join us, Beesly.
this chapter convinced me how amazing jim is.
it was great. i mean, i love this drama. i am glad i am not the only one who does it as drama (not angst).
Date: April 22, 2007 08:56 am Title: He was just Jim
This may be random, but just noticed your user name... are you also a fan of L&O: SVU? Or just a coinicidence?
Jim can move fast when Pam is in danger.
I really am enjoying this (and i know i have more to read)... but yeah, I tend to like drama, so I am not the best guage, but yep... enjoying this.
(and sorry, i tend to do comments per chapter, even with multiple chapters, just because then it gets really disjointed.
Author's Response:
I am a HUGE SVU fan! The name is soooo not a coincidence. thanks for noticing ;-)
Glad you're liking it and enjoying the drama. and I love comments per chapter ;-)
Date: April 22, 2007 08:51 am Title: Dunder Mifflin, this is Pam.
I find it odd that Pam would write down Jim and cross it out, because it is something I would do...
Poor Pam... you can't handle this on your own... :'(
Author's Response: uh it's something I have done. lol. it's kind of like taking someone out of your cell phone or off your buddy list after you've had a fight. They don't know it happened but it makes you feel better ;-)
Date: April 22, 2007 08:46 am Title: Prologue: How is New York?
Okay, so I have been wanting to read this ever since I read the summary. Now I finally have a chance.
:O! Jim recommended her!!
Author's Response: right? high drama ;-)
Date: April 22, 2007 08:40 am Title: Phantom Bruises
Love. Yay for the reemergence of old Jim.
Author's Response: lol amen.
Date: April 22, 2007 07:48 am Title: Prologue: How is New York?
Seeing how they would react to each other if they were strangers was very interesting. Making their way back to being friends is something I'm looking forward to. I like that this is slow and delicate, not rushed and insincere. We are seeing all of them.
Author's Response:
Slow and delicate is a HUGE compliment. Thank you! Keep reading and reviewing ;-)
10 [Report This]Date: April 22, 2007 07:38 am Title: Phantom Bruises
I think its very readable. I caught myself up on this story this weekend. I really appreciate how you've written Pam in this situation- very real. I went through this when I was 19 and four hours away from my family at college. Younger than Pam, but still, I can't tell you how much it would have meant to me to have someone there. Probably TMI, but I think its why I'm enjoying this story so much.
Author's Response:
Def not TMI ;-) I recently lost a father figure and I'm sure that's exactly where this story is coming from.
Thank you so much for the review, I can't tell you how glad I am to know that it reads realistically for someone other than myself lol. Sometimes I write and have no idea whether anyone else can relate. Keep reading, I'll try to keep it going ;-)
Date: April 22, 2007 06:45 am Title: Phantom Bruises
This story is amazing! I just read all the chapters so far and I had these tiny little tears leaking out the corngers of my eye, especially when Jim and Pam were still in the office and she asked Dwight to take her home. It was also really sad to see the effect that Pam's dad had on her. I'm really glad that Jim is back and I hope he continues to stop being an a-hole in the upcoming chapters.
Looking forward to more!
Author's Response:
lol I hope he stops being an a-hole too! Thanks for reviewing ;-)
Date: April 22, 2007 06:21 am Title: Phantom Bruises
I think this chapter def. should be included. Great work!
Author's Response:
kept it is, then. thanks