Date: September 05, 2020 09:07 am Title: Chapter 2
Oh. My. Gosh. What an ending. I didn't see that coming!
I love the way you've characterized Helene and Penny. We don't see them much in the show, but the way you've described them just feels right.
I also love that you subverted my expectations by inserting Karen as Jim's best friend. There's so much potential with this relationship.
Date: September 01, 2020 03:57 pm Title: Chapter 6
I vaguely remember there was once a mafia JAM fic I read in some distant life...
But seriously, this was really good. I'm a little worried that Jim and Pam now have asymmetric information about Helene's thoughts, but I suppose it's not really JAM if you don't have plates flying in the air with the potential to crash down ala The Secret or Beach Games. I still really enjoy this world, and I'm glad we got Betsy in this chapter. She's awesome.
Date: September 01, 2020 03:33 pm Title: Chapter 6
OMG! I LOVE this story. I just started reading it and have to say.... PUHLEASE DONT WAIT SO LONG FOR AN UPDATE. I saw in your notes that some updates took 8 months, omg I can’t wait that long (I have so many stories that don’t have updates and this is probably one of my favorites so please update regularly!).
I love Mafia Jim and the interaction with him and Pam - and want to see them fall in love as it seems they clearly are on the road to doing so. I’d love to hear some of Jim’s perspective as we see Pam’s.
You’re writing is so great and the subtle little things these characters, especially Jim like with the kiss in the garden, is just amazing.
Thank you for writing and so glad I found this fic!
Date: September 01, 2020 02:44 pm Title: Chapter 6
I’ve been dying to read this all day (stupid work) and finally got the chance and literally couldn’t tear my eyes away. I am SO CAPTIVATED by this world and these versions of Jim and Pam! It all read as si believable and real and I just know things aren’t going to always be this easy for them, and I am so excited to read more.
And girl. That tiny, sweet, mostly for show kiss killed me. And then HIS TEXT and his SOFTNESS and just. Mafia Jim could give me concrete boots and send me to sleep with the fishes and I’d say thank you.
Date: September 01, 2020 11:10 am Title: Chapter 6
COL- “I forgot how to write” -LEY. That was so good! Everything about their situation is so intense and exciting and this chapter flowed with the last like it was all written in the same time period. The Jam chemistry is real and that whole scene in the backyard was very entertaining and cute. And the way you ended it? So sweet. Love Jim just letting her sleep. Your writing is as good as ever and I can’t wait for the next chapter!
Date: September 01, 2020 11:02 am Title: Chapter 6
I really love this fic and got super excited to see it updated again. I'm literally biding my time for more witty and sexy banter and them falling in love. The mix of reactions from Betsy and Helene were great. Ah man got so excited to see this. Can't wait for more.
Date: September 01, 2020 08:25 am Title: Chapter 6
You really had to throw in that "Not a bad day, Beesly" in there, huh? As if I wasn't already dying just from this story being updated, now I'm pretty sure I'm deceased.
Also, their little show for Betsy? I also cannot wait to see what Jim can do when his mother isn't watching. And then he drove around Scranton for a couple of hours while she slept in the car? You're literally going to kill me, Coley. If I don't leave a review on the next chapter it's because I've died from this one.
Date: September 01, 2020 07:36 am Title: Chapter 6
AH. I'm so happy you updated this!
I am very much here for more-clever-than-anticipated Helene and Betsy, and of course no matter the universe Pam and Jim can't quite manage to communicate well. The banter around the kiss was *perfect*.
Date: September 01, 2020 02:07 am Title: Chapter 6
I was SO STINKIN’ EXCITED. To see this updated, you have no idea. I love Mafia Jim so much.
I am quite literally entranced by this story and of course, your writing is flawless. You make it seem so effortless to have this underlying tension while having them still be very much in character but also realistically in this unviverse. The threats they face, while not shown implicitly, still fill the atmosphere with their violence. The way you have shaped Jim’s character is so very on par with how I see him and I love the little nuanced ways we get to see that.
Anyway, you know I’m absolutely terrible at reviews but, Coley, this story is such a masterpiece.
Date: September 01, 2020 01:24 am Title: Chapter 6
Yay! The more Mafia Jim, the better!
And oh, I love these moms so much. Especially with knives, he-he. Both conversations Pam had were so realistic, and I like that little test Betsy made. My only regret is that Pam didn't tell Jim about her discussion with Helene, but... trust no one, right? And though I want her to be honest and open with Jim, I can't really blame her.
Apart from Pam's silence about a certain thing, I really like how she and Jim worked together. That's probably weird, but I made a lot of 'awww' noises during my reading. Especially in the end, the last line was excellent!
Thank you so much for the wonderful update! Cross my finger that the next one will be soon :)
Date: September 01, 2020 01:15 am Title: Chapter 6
Hello. Hi. I am SO excite.
“For too many years, I saw it.” Okay, so Helene is more perceptive that I gave her credit. I love that she’s challenging Pam on this. It’s such a mother move.
If she has to make out with Jim to prove something to her mother, I’m not going to be mad...
You’re throwing me into remembering why I love this version of Pam so much. She’s got that extra bit of Fancy New Beesly sass and she shows it in spades here with the way she handles Helene.
“Jesus, look at him. Think he’d switch places with his brother? I’d marry him in an instant.”
“See, about that…”
I want to copy this whole entire thing and be like this, this is my favorite. But that would be insane, but like *this*, this is it. It’s perfect. Same, Penny, same.
“You’re prettier than Katy.” Finally someone gets it. Sign me up to team Betsy.
Why does Pam giving tea as her drink of choice do something to me? It’s fine. It’s the most simple of canon choices and I love to see it so much.
“I’m not just saying that because you’re the first girl he’s ever brought home to meet me.” Oh stop. Do I love Betsy? I think I do. It’s such a contrast to Helene.
“Pam had to bite back a laugh over the fact that she’d found herself on the receiving end of two women with knives that evening and Jim’s beloved security was nowhere to be found.” Coley. You write the words so well. I love this tinge of humor. It’s perfect.
Damn. It’s so good. That little slip from Betsy with NYU and Pam just acing it.
Oh. Oh. Okay. I got the mother wrong, but still the same brilliant, delightfully trope-y plan.
“Just wait until my mother isn’t watching.” PERFECT.
OH. You’re just going to put that final line in there and assume we’re okay. It’s fine. I’m fine. Everything is fine.
If we’re still here?! Coley. COLEY. It goes without saying, but I will always be 110% here for anything you do.
Date: September 01, 2020 12:26 am Title: Chapter 6
I almost didn't believe it when I saw it. Very glad to see this update don't get me wrong.
Helene seems very sharp. She clearly knows something's up and I doubt the explanation Pam just gave her will really suffice. However Pam's quick on her feet too. Though her holding off on telling Jim this new update seems like a set up for something to bite them in the ass later. At the same it also rings true to canon Pam. Clamp down on the truth.
The visit to Betsy seemed less ominous, yet at the same time, there's still tension. Especially with Betsy pulling that little quiz about where Jim went to college. Betsy may seem sweet, but there's hidden depths to her.
Seems like that line on Pam's list, about not falling in love, is starting to shake. Just a little bit. There does seem to be something stirring with her in regards to Jim. Same for him. Nice way to bring that all out.
Again thank you for this surprise update. It's really great to see this continue.
Date: June 30, 2020 05:41 pm Title: Chapter 5
That's it. That's the review. Cause you've done this again. Left us with a cliffhanger (what the hell, Helene?!) after the turmoil of that jewelry store conversation (amazing!), Pam's flirting (terrible!), and Jim's whole Ring Test (brilliant!!).
And the way Jim handled himself at Helene's was perfection.
You masterfully slip in all of these moments when Pam lets herself toy with the idea of Really Liking him and it's completely normal that I'm YELLING at my phone while I read this. I'm so excited about this entire fic and where you keep promising to take these big plans. Please please don't make us wait another 8 months. *please*
Date: May 31, 2020 11:14 pm Title: Chapter 4
How do you GET their dialogue down so perfectly? Just the texts from the beginning about where to have dinner are too good.
Pam's Lists? SO GOOD. Number Six? Amazing.
But it's their banter that you give us, gift-wrapped with a red bow on top. And we get so many goodies that I can't wait to hear more about or give us so many clues into their individual history. I know we're going to see more about Katy. But I'm BEGGING for more about that date auction. That Pam bid on. FOR RYAN.
And that "charity" swimsuit calendar. Please. Please. Give us both of those.
And I can't help but love how protective Jim is here even though Pam is entirely annoyed with him.
There is a LOT of information in this chapter but I love where this is taking us. I can't wait for more.
Date: May 12, 2020 11:41 am Title: Chapter 4
“See, I know where your tattoo is.” She raised her hand and let her fingertips trail over his right bicep, knowing exactly where the Halpert family crest was inked into his skin. She heard his breath catch in his throat and dropped her hand, stunned silent by her own moment of boldness."
I can't stop thinking about that line, because, apparently it's the sexiest thing I've read in a long, long time. Just amazing.
Thank you for such a great story!
Date: April 06, 2020 12:18 am Title: Chapter 5
Coley just when I thought I was out, you pull me back in. I’m kidding, I was never out and now you’ve left me eagerly awaiting the next chap!
Your characterization is just so good, you’re able to build on the traits Pam and Jim have in the show so naturally that while they’re in such a different scenario they still feel like our Pam and Jim (albeit sassier and more assertive). And Kelly didn’t really need any transformation, she fits right in and your Kelly voice is perfect.
Love the whole scene at the gallery, Pam being so grumpy she doesn’t see at all the heart shaped diamond (I see what you did there ;-) ) was a gag and then Jim blowing her away with a perfect ring.
Such great tense dynamic at Helene’s but you’ve left us with quite the cliffhanger! So no pressure but i do hope the next chapter comes soon!
Date: April 04, 2020 07:33 am Title: Chapter 5
Oh my godddd this is SO good and captivating! I am loving it. I am sure you have twists and turns lined up and I just know they’re going to be so good. You’ve set this world up so well and I can’t wait to see what happens!
Date: April 02, 2020 07:25 pm Title: Chapter 5
OMGoodness! I don’t mind letting you know that I have been waiting so (im)patiently for an update of this one that I may have let out a bit of a little squeal hen I saw it. Then I convinced myself that I probably was looking at a different page so I hit the most recents again and it was still there... YAY! Gotta say, this did not disappoint. First of all, you are just a fantastic story teller. I think you do such a wonderful job of bringing in parts of cannon but yet twisting it to fit this type of a scenario. You also somehow keep Jim and Pam and honestly even Kelly, in character but with little changes to account for being in this different world here. Like Jim and Pam, as much as I’d like it to already be so clear that they have a thing for each other, in this world it wouldn’t really be believable. Like, while they don’t know each other, they’ve known of each other I’d imagine pretty much their entire lives. Because of the way they’ve grown up, not to mention the horrible current circumstances, they don’t automatically trust anyone, not even each other. I love though that Jim is still Jim and early on sent Pam’s taser back in jello, letting her know a bit about him. I’m always pretty blown away when someone can create a world that is so completely different that the actual show, and really make it believable that these characters can exist in that world and they show us how with their writing... that’s exactly what you are doing.
I have to say, first off, Pam sure isn’t making it easy on Jim but wow, with Pam’s attitude ring shopping and when Jim showed up at her work, it gave the chance for you to show that Jim is still our (Pam’s) Jim. He takes care of her by not just picking out the ring hims of, but the perfect ring. But, he only gives it to her after he shows he knows what she opulent want with a prank ring. I’m ordering why Helene is so convinced that Pam is ruining things. This Helene reminds me very much of the Helene that dated Michael not caring if it upset her pregnant daughter. I felt season 2 Helene that showed up at the office and asked ‘which on is Jim?’ was a more ca in, loving mom. I liked her way better than season 6 Helene. Of course I didn’t care for the way they cast most family members of Jim and Pam’s. Hated Tom and Pete and just thought all the Parents just... didn’t fit in my mind. Anyhow....
Fantastic job here. I really hope we don’t have to wait to long for the next chapter. After all, how long is Jim supposed to wait while Helene has Pam cornered?! 🙂. Seriously, can’t wait for more!