Date: November 13, 2019 03:26 pm Title: Chapter 5
As I’ve said before, I LOVE this story. This is a fantastic chapter. I hope you keep this story nice and long. And I hope it doesn’t end when they finally admit their feelings for each other. I would really love to read the fluffy details of what happens after they realize how they great they are together
Date: November 13, 2019 02:13 am Title: Chapter 5
I think this may just be my favorite chapter. It’s so perfect and so not all in the same breath. I hope those crazy kids can work it all out soon. I live for a good trope & this whole married, but kind of fake married thing that they’re doing is just the trope-iest. That last line, oh boy that last line. I say this a lot, but I definitely mean it - I can’t wait to see what comes next!
Date: November 12, 2019 07:32 pm Title: Chapter 5
Very interesting take on the aftermath of everything here. Now granted Pam has a ton of baggage from her past hanging over here head. Her expectations that living with Jim would be similar to living with Roy, as well as her still taking care of Roy prove that. Jim wanting so hard to cling to this "thing" they have. And of course underneath it all, their old acquaintance, fear. Fear that this relationship is just a rebound, that it's nothing more than the kick in the pants that she needs to break away from a life she didn't want, fear that maybe, just maybe, this could be the real deal.
Great writing to thread the line between hope, fun, and fear like that. It makes for compelling story. It also makes me as a reader just want to shout at this version of Jim and Pam to "get overyourselves, tell each other you love them, and be enjoy your happiness." So there's that. Always great to see an update on this one.
Date: November 07, 2019 10:56 pm Title: Chapter 4
Oh, I’m so glad that you’ve given us the night in the honeymoon suite! And what a delightful night it was, I loved that at the heart of it all, Pam and Jim were still them, even with a whole new layer of intimacy in the picture.
It was hard to see them then, after all that, still not communicate very clearly with one another. However, that very much keeps in canon character for the pair of them too, so it makes all the sense in the world that that is what their day after would look like.
Can’t wait to read more. I feel like there’s a few more miscommunications before they figure it all out...
Thank you very much! I've never written smut before, and I found it a bit stressful... Next time there will be scented candles and prosecco.
There is a wee bit more miscommunication and some angst to come. Absolutely definitely ending happily though!
Date: November 07, 2019 08:51 am Title: Chapter 1
I register to say 'Ohmygodohmygodohmygod!' Your story is fantastic, and I like every tiny piece of it (I'm still don't know what I feel about the whole cheating Roy thing, but that's in character, I guess). Please, continue!
Author's Response: Thank you very much indeed! Glad you've enjoyed it so far. I haven't done this before, so the encouragement really helps. :0)
Date: November 06, 2019 05:37 pm Title: Chapter 4
Great update. Lots of fun with the wedding night there. It's great that they still have their fun moments of joking around with each other. I do like that thought that Jim had there. That using up the pack of condoms confirmed, at least from his mindset, they were perfect for each other.
I also really like how Pam's bringing out FNB. How excited she is when she unleashed that part of herself. I think you've got it right that the old part of her is at war with the FNB feelings. After all if she stayed with Roy after everything you mentioned here, those are some powerful feelings to overcome. Still I think, and hope, that with Jim at her side there will be more FNB moments to counter anything Old Mousy Pam might be scared of.
So thanks for giving us this look into the immediate aftermath of everything. Monday morning with everyone else, should prove quite interesting.
Author's Response: Thanks again for your feedback - I really do appreciate it. 8o)
Date: November 02, 2019 06:44 am Title: Chapter 3
Sam, I am LOVING this story. You do a great job with the characters secondary to the JAM storyline. Your Michael is GREAT throughout this whole thing.
And it's so absurd but we know it's going to work out which is absolutely in step with the show. Bravo to you for pulling it off wonderfully.
I want to be so mad at you for not coming right out with what happened between Pam and Jim! But the way you're teasing and dragging us along is so delicious and giving us little hints to gobble up, so for now I'll just (im)patiently wait for updates.
:) Really this story is a delight. Welcome to the fandom!
Thanks for your kind review. Having a kind of mini-crisis about the next phase, so it's very welcome!
And thanks also for your welcome - I've been loving the work I've read, and I'm constantly amazed at people's creativity. It really has been an inspiration.
Date: October 31, 2019 12:27 am Title: Chapter 3
I was kind of hoping this was where we were headed with the whole bride & groom didn’t show for their wedding thing... I was a little sad when the chapter started with Mark, but at the same time I loved the inclusion of Mark. I was worried that you’d skip over what happened, but I’m glad the flashback was there. I am going to need to flashback to the honeymoon suite also though - fingers crossed that makes it into the next chapter!
I wrote this straight and I wrote it with the Mark and flashback sandwich. Other people being able to see what they can't or won't is a bit of a theme, so I decided to go with that - hope I didn't completely ruin the moment!
Thanks for your feedback - it's really useful.
Date: October 30, 2019 05:22 pm Title: Chapter 3
Please tell me you are not glossing over what happened in the honeymoon suite! I need a detailed play by play in the next chapter. I’m pretty sure no one will mind the fluffy smutty details 😇
Author's Response: We'll see. Might need a glass of wine first ;o)
Date: October 30, 2019 01:57 pm Title: Chapter 3
Wow! This is just all full of twist and turns. It's one thing to have Jim say he'll her fiance, but to then just agree to get married, just like that! Again I say wow. Much better with the dialogue this time around. Good balance of talking, narration, and internal type thoughts.
Can't wait to see what Pam thinks about all this.
Author's Response: Thank you!
Date: October 29, 2019 11:12 pm Title: Chapter 2
Well, that’s quite a bit of a twist on a few of the major booze cruise moments... Roy cheating was both a shock & predictable all at once. I loved both your description of his stages of drunkenness & Pam’s sad awareness/acceptance of them. It was nice to see the inclusion of Pam and Jim’s iconic moment on the deck.
That ending though, that’s the big twist I am so very here for...
Author's Response: Thank you - much appreciated!
Date: October 29, 2019 07:03 pm Title: Chapter 2
Ok, so first off I do want to say that I'm still enjoying this quite a bit. I do think there was quite a lot of narration when your meaning could have also been achieved through character conversation and dialogue. Actually having the actual conversation between Roy and Katy where they discover their previous high school connection could have been a good spot for that as an example. That being said the internal thoughts of both Pam and Jim are very compelling and very real.
Now that's a big change from canon, but not in an unbelievable way. I think just about everyone could envision Roy and Katy sneaking away like that. For Pam to discover them like that though, yeah that's a big kick to get her to get out of that relationship.
One of the things that's a hallmark in canon is the cringey awkwardness that sometimes comes about. You capture that sense very well with that scene with Captain Jack calling out Pam with the note. Especially after Jim steps up. All the supporting cast members reactions are on point. It's easy to see Jim as the knight to the rescue here. Something tells me that while Pam does appreciate such a gesture, especially to get her out of the immediate situation, she's more than able and willing to partner with Jim rather than simply rely on him to get clear of everything.
Thanks, Warrior. I did actually originally write a number of conversations into this, but I decided that since the only reason I included them was to break up the prose, it was kind of cheating. At this point they're both alone with their thoughts, mostly, and so I decided to stick with that. I take your point, though, and i agonised over it.
As for Pam and where she is on her personal journey, I'm thinking she's got a bit of coming and going to do before she can move on from years of passivity. She's found some strength and resolve here, but there will probably be some backsliding. We'll see.
Thanks for taking the time to review.
Date: October 29, 2019 06:55 pm Title: Chapter 2
OMG! Where are you going with this??? I know it’s not the most detailed review, but talk about a cliffhanger. Love your writing, love how you are presenting each character, and how you give us both Jim and Pam’s POV in each chapter.
I cannot wait for the next chapter. I really hope you post soon!
Author's Response: Thank you!
Date: October 28, 2019 08:38 pm Title: Chapter 1
Welcome to MTT! I’m very glad you found us :)
I am so intrigued by this story already. First things first, your Michael cracks me up. “So spray me in cooking fat and roll me in sprinkles” made me laugh so hard. You’re already doing a wonderful job with the supporting characters.
Your Jim though. He’s great. The whole testing to see if Katy giggled at everything is priceless. And his ever-present concern and interest for Pam is spot on.
But they’re going to Ohio! And Pam doesn’t want to marry Roy! These little divergences from the original Booze Cruise have me so interested in what happens next... I can’t wait to see what you’ve come up with.
Author's Response: Thank you so much for your reply! You're very kind. I'm glad you've enjoyed it so far - I do hope you like what it is I've come up with.
Date: October 28, 2019 06:31 pm Title: Chapter 1
Interesting twist. The characters are familiar, but there is enough difference written in that one's not sure where this is headed. Very introspective to be sure once everyone in on the bus though. Pam's thoughts and feelings are rather telling. As of right now, she's not really seeing Jim as anything more than a friend. It looks like Jim is thinking he'd like more than friendship with Pam though, even with Katy sitting next to him. Very curious to see how this all plays out.
Thank you very much for your reply, II appreciate it.
In answer to your point, things are about to be changing...
Date: October 28, 2019 02:13 pm Title: Chapter 1
Great start to the story. I’m very intrigued about how the events in this booze cruise are going to develop. Can’t wait to read more
Author's Response: Thank you so much for taking the time to read and reply! Glad you found it interesting.
Date: October 28, 2019 12:31 pm Title: Chapter 1
Welcome to MTT! This is great! I always love a different take on the booze cruise & this is certainly unique. I like that you’ve changed up the boat, the lake, etc. I’m looking forward to seeing what other change this could bring... It’s nice to see where Pam is at here, it seems far less likely to end in the mess that was setting the date which I am very excited about. Can’t wait to see where you take this.
Author's Response: Thank you for the welcome and for reading. Hope it lives up to your expectations! :o)