Sunday Night
He hadn't meant for it to happen. He had gone over to her place with the simple intention of talking to her. He even brought pizza. And they did talk. They talked about all the things they hadn't even acknowledged in the past year. She told him about canceling her wedding, and being alone, and adjusting to being independent, and also of how she thought of him every single day while he was gone. He told her about moving, and Stamford, and how he thought of her every single day while he was gone. It felt good to get everything out in the open for once.
But at one point Pam's emotions got the better of her, and she started sobbing. That was his weakness; he couldn't stand to see her cry. Soon his arms were around her as they embraced for several long minutes, and then his hands were on her face as he tried to wipe her tears away, and then his lips were on hers as if there were no other choice. The kiss turned quickly from slow and tender to frantic and hungry. The next thing he knew they were both without clothes and lying on her couch and he was inside her. It didn't last long, and when it was over they just lay there holding each other for an indeterminate amount of time.
Finally Pam spoke. "What... just happened?"
"Well, Beesly, if you don't know then..." It was probably lame to joke about it but she poked him playfully in the ribs.
"You know what I mean. What does this mean?"
It was only then that his thoughts went back to Karen. Crap. He had just cheated on his girlfriend. Never in a million years had he ever fancied himself a cheater. He felt the sting of shame creep up his neck.
"I guess I have to talk to Karen," he replied. The magic was broken, and he started to get up and gather his clothes.
"Jim?" Pam looked concerned, and he realized he needed to clarify.
"I am going to break up with her, don't worry. I should have done that... this shouldn't have happened this way. I'm sorry. I'm an asshole."
They both got dressed in silence, before she said, "No, you're not. I'm just as much to blame as you."
He put his arms around her and pulled her into a hug. "I don't want to leave."
"Then don't."
That was all he needed to hear. He decided that he would deal with Karen tomorrow, that tonight belonged to Pam. They soon made their way to her bedroom, and the second time was much slower as they took their time exploring one another. When they were done they fell asleep wrapped up in each other.
It was still early when they woke up. Jim found his clothes as Pam struggled to open her eyes. He kissed her softly and told her he had to go home to get ready for work. She pulled him back into bed, muttering, "Let's just skip work today."
They ended up having sex just one more time before he left.
-----
Monday Morning
So here he was, standing in front of Karen in the parking lot, a billion different emotions running through him as he watched her try to process what he had just told her. He couldn't quite figure out how he could be so sorry, yet not sorry at all. He hated himself for hurting her, yet strangely he didn't regret what had happened. That, of course, made him feel like an even bigger asshole.
Karen just stood there, looking off in the distance trying to keep the tears back. The she turned and walked away, mumbling, "Tell Michael I'm sick today."
"Karen, wait!"
She didn't stop, just headed straight for her car. He ran after her.
"I know nothing I can say can make it better, but I am so sorry I hurt you. I didn't mean for it to happen." But he realized he should just stop talking before he made it worse, if that were even possible.
Karen turned and faced him. "Do you love her?"
He only hesitated for a second, "Yes, I love her."
"And... me?"
He just looked at her, in the eye this time.
"Okay then. Like I said, tell Michael I am sick." She got in her car and drove away.
He stayed in the parking lot for a few minutes before he headed back to the office. Pam was not at her desk. Actually, no one was at their desk. Shit, he thought, there was a meeting. He tried to slip into the conference room unnoticed, but was immediately called out by Andy.
"Hey, look, it's tuna with tardy sauce!"
Jim imagined himself punching a hole in Andy's head the size of the one Andy had punched in the wall. He took the only empty seat, next to Meredith and two seats away from Pam, who was trying too hard to appear nonchalant.
"Girlfriend troubles, Jim?" Michael asked, as if it were a totally appropriate subject for an office meeting.
"No," he replied, annoyed. "Everything is fine."
"Oh, okay. That's not the way it looked from here," Michael countered, gesturing toward the window.
Great. Had the whole office watched the scene below? Thankfully the windows don't open, so the chances of them hearing anything were pretty slim.
"Karen's just not feeling well. She decided to take a sick day," he said, keeping his tone as flat as possible, "So... what is this meeting about?"
Michael surprisingly let it drop and went on about how successful Survivor Day was and some other inane nonsense that Jim couldn't be bothered to listen to. He just needed this stupid meeting to end so he could talk to Pam.
As it was, it was past eleven before he got a chance to speak to her. She was in the breakroom, looking for something in the vending machine.
"Hey," he said, gazing into the vending machine.
"Hi," she replied, "So... how did it go?"
"I told her. Everything."
"What?" Pam turned to face him. "So she knows about..."
Just then Kelly entered the breakroom. Pam looked away.
"Oh my God, Pam, so, are you going to go for it?"
Jim's eyes bugged out of his head. How on earth did Kelly know?
"Oh, I don't know, I'm not sure I'm qualified."
"Wait," Jim interrupted, "What are you guys talking about?"
"Um, the new marketing position, duh," Kelly answered, rolling her eyes.
"What new marketing position?"
"Geez, Jim, do you ever even pay attention at meetings?" She turned back to Pam, "Anyway, I think you would be perfect for it. You should definitely go for it!"
"Well, I'll think about it. We'll see."
Kelly got her soda and went back to her desk. Pam grabbed Jim's arm and whispered, "You told her?"
"Yes, but there's nothing to worry about. Although I am definitely the biggest jerk in the world at the moment," he said, then added, "So what's this about a marketing position? I must have really zoned out at the meeting."
"Oh, it's nothing, just that since that incident with the watermarks gone bad, they want someone here to handle stuff like that, as well as the website."
"You should do it," he smiled at her, "Kelly's right, you'd be perfect."
Pam looked up at him, with true happiness in her eyes for the first time in a long while.
"Maybe I will."
Author's Chapter Notes:
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
ExtremelyGruntled is the author of 20 other stories.
This story is a favorite of 12 members. Members who liked Pole Position also liked 1957 other stories.
