Dwight came in and strode directly into Michael’s office without even hanging up his coat.

“Michael, I require your immediate attention. I have noticed that most of the products in this office are improperly tested. With your permission, I would like to examine them and file a report on the condition of all staplers printers, hole punchers, scanners, keyboards, office chairs, calculators, scissors-”

“Dwight, why would you want to do that?”

“Michael, 2500 left handed people are injured each year by products designed for right handed people. Clearly the safety standards at our office facilities are disappointingly slack.”

“Are you left handed, Dwight?”

“I have mastered the use of both hands. What if I accidentally stapled with the wrong hand and sustained an injury? What then?”

“Argh. Fine; go.”