From: Pbeesly

Sent: June 18, 2006 10:02 AM

To: Jhalpert

Subject: re: Cairns Day 1

Well, I prayed for sun, but it’s probably too late. Can I pray for retroactive sun? You’re going to be so spoiled after lounging around three swimming pools and snorkeling in the Coral Sea that you probably aren’t going to want to hang out in Davie’s wading pool, when you get back...and it’s got Dora the Explorer characters on it , too!

I just realized that I’ve never seen you in a bathing suit. We will have to remedy this situation when you get back. Dan’s invitation specifically mentions a swimming pool. I might actually buy something new, myself, for the occasion. I don’t think we will be going water skiing or riding a wave runner, so I think that a bikini might be just the ticket. What do you think? I’ve been going to the gym every day after work…did I mention that? Of course, you’ve been lounging around a pool eating Tim Tams, whatever they are, and drinking beer, not to mention eating all those Australian breakfasts, so I imagine you probably look like Kevin in a bathing suit these days…ah such a pity!

Guess what…I got my invitation to Dwight and Angela’s wedding in the mail yesterday. August 26 is the big day. I am invited "with guest," in case you don’t get one of your own. I didn’t ask her if she invited you. I’ve kind of been avoiding Angela and Dwight lately. They both have been pestering me with questions whenever they see me…you would think I was Martha Stewart. I’ve planned exactly one wedding which, as I recall, never happened! So I am hardly an expert. The reception is going to be at Dwight’s farm. So that should be an adventure. Didn’t he mention to you once that his farm only has one bathroom, and that it was under a porch? I can’t imagine Angela approving of such a thing. I’m picturing lovely bouquets of beets blending nicely with Angela’s bridesmaids in varying shades of gray…now that I think of it I would be an awesome wedding planner! But only if we can get Michael to actually perform the ceremony as Ping. Kevin is agitating for his band to play…I wonder if Dwight will go for it? Can you tell that I’m in a silly mood today?

If you are taking a boat out to the reef, two bits of advice; wear plenty of sunscreen and don’t forget to take Dramamine before you get on the boat. From what I read on the website, it can be pretty rough going out there. This isn’t Lake Wallenpaupack, you know.

Have a great time.

Love and kisses,

Pam

From: Jhalpert

Sent: June 19, 2006 6:02PM

To: Pbeesly

Subject: Cairns Day 2

Dearest Pam,

Well your prayer for sun might have been late, but it worked anyway. We had a wonderful day. Well, most of it was wonderful, that is. Your advice about the Dramamine came just a bit too late. I’ve been on boats lots of times and have never been sick, so I didn’t think I needed it on the catamaran. Maybe the fact that it was called The Wavedancer should have given me a clue. Anyway, after an hour of "wave dancing" I was pretty sick, though it didn’t get too extreme, if you get my drift.

With the Aussie’s tendency to give nicknames to everything, it should be no surprise that the way to deal with the sun out here is called "Slip, slap, slop." That means slip on a shirt, slap on a hat, and slop on sunscreen. I gather that the sun here is pretty intense, and can burn you quicker than my old toaster. I had bought a hat at the flea market in Sydney and had bought some good sunscreen at the hotel shop, so I was pretty well prepared, or so I thought.

The accents up here in Cairns (pronounced Cans) are even more extreme than in Sydney. Perfect example. As we were getting off the boat onto the island (land at last, thank God!) the mate called out, "Now don’t forget your tails!" Tails? The last time I looked, I didn’t have one. But as we all stared at him uncomprehendingly, he finally grabbed somebody’s beach towel and waved it around, "Your tails!" Aha! Beach tails! I had a couple of those, provided by the hotel.

Okay…here comes the slightly embarrassing part. On the boat, we were offered, for a small fee, protective suits. These were like wet suits only thinner and more encompassing. The point being that they would protect you from accidental contact with the coral, and exposure to the sun. Since I hadn’t taken their advice about the Dramamine, to my regret, I decided to go with the suit, as did pretty much everybody else on the boat. The suits were terrific, I admit. They were one piece, made of very thin but strong material, zip up suits which had stirrup feet, a hood and even mittens, with slits so that you could stick your fingers out if necessary. Apparently coral can really give you a bad cut, which can easily get infected…or they just wanted to rent a bunch of these suits…you take your pick.

So I put this thing on, which was a bright electric blue, and well, wait until you see the pictures! Despite the Tim Tams, I am still quite thin, thank you very much, but there were quite a few people on the boat who weren’t. People, who shouldn’t have even been wearing bathing suits, no less skin tight bright blue body suits. The whole island looked like a Teletubby convention, and I looked like a blue colored pencil.

Add flippers, masks and snorkels, and we now looked like alien Teletubbies. The funniest thing was that as we went out onto the reef we were supposed to go with a buddy, for safety. Some young girl…I think she was one of the chorus people…she looked vaguely familiar from the Vibe hotel...asked if she could be my partner. I said sure, but once we were all suited up and out on the water, she pretty much looked like everybody else, and I never could keep track of her. You are swimming with your face in the water, trying not to drift onto the actual coral, which is amazing, by the way, and every once in a while you look up to see where you are…and there are bunches of identical blue people, doing the same thing. They really need a better way to identify people. At any rate, she didn’t drown…I saw her later on the way back in the boat. But I don’t think she was too happy with me.

But, I, on the other hand, had a great time. The suits…as silly as they looked, really did the trick. I didn’t have to worry about sunscreen or coral scratches and could just drift around and look to my heart’s content. We saw sea turtles…giant things the size of tables and so many gorgeous fish, it was beyond description. I even saw one of those half yellow/half purple things I saw at the aquarium! The coral was really cool, too, moving with the water, with the little fish drifting in and out. I wish I had an underwater camera, but I forgot to buy one of those cheap disposable ones at home, and the ones on the boat were too expensive. Still, I’m sure there are better pictures to be found elsewhere...the amazing thing was seeing all this stuff in person, for real!

I swam until last call for lunch, then peeled off my blue man group costume, and ate on the boat. They did a really nice buffet. After lunch I decided against trying to get my suit, which was now wet and full of sand, back on, and took a ride on the glass bottomed boat, instead. I got to see a lot of the reef further out than I had gone while snorkeling.

Before we took off again, I remembered to take Dramamine and I was fine on the ride back. The Captain said that we had the first good weather he’s seen in weeks! On the way back the mate took out a guitar and sang. He was really good, too. You know…I should take guitar lessons again. Not that I’m a great singer, as you know, but I would love to be able to play more than the opening chords to Stairway to Heaven. One of these days. After all, you’re taking painting lessons again.

This evening, I think I will go out and have dinner on the esplanade.

There’s something I just love. It’s one of my absolute favorite sensual experiences. It’s after a day at the beach…and it has to be a beach, not a lake or a pool. You come back to the beach house or hotel (somehow it’s never home) and you are kind of sticky from the salt water, and kind of sandy in odd places, and maybe a little bit sunburned (this doesn’t work if you are really sunburned, but a little bit is good) and you take a hot shower, and wash all the sand and crap out of your hair, and come out, put on clean clothes and have an ice cold drink. When I was a kid it was a Coke, now it’s a cold beer. And that whole feeling is something I just love. I’m not describing it well, I’m sure. That, and the feeling of walking on the beach in the late, late afternoon, are probably among my favorite things. My Mom’s brother used to have a house at the Jersey shore and we would go there for a week or so each summer. It was just wonderful.

Which brings me to my big plan for tomorrow, which is precisely nothing. I’m taking the day off from my vacation. I’ve got three pools and an entire ocean with an esplanade. If it’s not raining, I’m just going to hang out tomorrow. I have one more big trip planned…to the rain forest, but I’ll save that for Wednesday. I also have to do some wash before my underwear situation reaches a crisis.

Love,

Jim