She was pouring herself a glass of wine when she heard him walk in. Already an argument with Jim was a lot different from an argument with Roy. Roy usually didn't come looking for her when the dust settled. Roy usually took her walking out of the room as a very good sign. A sign that he was off the hook. A sign that he could go back to watching TV or drinking his beer or whatever else he'd been doing.

Jim somehow knew she needed a minute...but also knew it wasn't the end. That she didn't want him to give up. All she really wanted was a few minutes to get herself together and collect her thoughts.

The front door clicked ever so softly closed behind him, and she loved him a little bit more than she had a few moments before. He was Jim and he wasn't running away. Not from this - not now that they were right on the verge of something amazing.

He sat her empty beer bottle on the counter opposite of hers, and leaned against it. His elbows propped in front of him. Jim turned towards her after a few seconds of silence. Their eyes met...held.

"Hey," she whispered.

"Hi."

He watched her smooth one socked toe along the linoleum in his kitchen before she spoke again. "It wasn't a decision I could make in 2 seconds," she whispered. "I wish I was like that - like you -

"Oh," he said holding up a hand with a wry smile. His head moved back and forth. "Believe me...I - Pam it took me years to tell you how I felt. I'm not some expert at seizing the moment."

She tucked her hands inside the pocket of his sweater and for some reason that made him inordinately happy. She wasn't so angry that she was pulling it over her head - throwing it at him.

"...I," Jim paused, chose his words carefully. "It wasn't that I expected you to leave him immediately...I just...God, Pam...I just wanted you to acknowledge what it was that was going on between us...To just look at me and tell me the truth...But you passed it off like I was some kind of infatuated kid...and then you said you were drunk -

"I told you I'd wanted to kiss you too!"

"And then you said you were still going to marry him, I -

Jim cut himself off. Pushed him self away from where he'd been leaning against the sink and moved closer to her. "If you could just please know...that this is not the way I typically conduct a first date...that...that's just very important to note."

Pam blinked a few times to rid herself of the coming tears. "Wow...special treatment."

He tilted his head and sighed. "I'm so sorry...Can we start over again? I mean...go to a restaurant or something? We would have never have gotten into this in public."

There hands were mere centimeters apart against the cupboard and she wrapped hers around his.

"I'd rather be having this conversation then not having it."

He squeezed her fingers back. "Yeah....me too."

When he reached out to pull her close, she melted against him. God, he was so warm. Pam nestled against his chest, shutting her eyes as she stood under the kitchen lights with him.

Jim's voice was gravely and soft and when he finally spoke, she could feel it vibrate against her ear. "Small talk always wears me out."

She giggled. "How do you even make it to second dates if that's your version of small talk?"

"Well that's not a nice question."

"You know what's so great about this?" She said finally looking up at him, and he trailed his thumb along her chin. She was with him. Seriously with him. Not just because they got along so well and they'd finally admitted an attraction, but because they wanted to be together. Through this kind of stuff too...the hard stuff.

This was actually turning out to be not such a bad date.

"My appliances?..."

"No...this date"

"You found something good about the date, too huh?"

She smiled up at him. "Yes...How many people do you know who get this kind of stuff all aired out at the beginning of their relationship? I mean no one right...how lucky are we?"

"Uh...I don't think that's how it works Pam. Most people don't have all this stuff to work out on their first date."

"Suck it."

"That's...you're really unpleasant at..." he glanced at the clock on the wall behind her. "2:45 a.m."

"Guess it's time you found that out now..."

He lifted his eyebrows, and she immediately started to blush. She hadn't meant that to sound a suggestive as it had...but it wound up sounding that way just the same. She'd basically implied that one day he'd be seeing more of her at 2:45 a.m. That maybe he should get used to her....

Actually, it wasn't such a bad implication. Actually...she was glad she made it.

"Thanks for the head's up, Beesly," he said, his voice full of laughter.

She traced a pattern through his sweater with her finger and reveled in that fact that argument or not, she was still in his arms. How many minutes had they been standing like this in the middle of his kitchen?

"That night...that was my very first kiss from anyone besides my mom, my dad, my grandparents, my aunt Linda, and Roy."

Jim stared at the top of her head for a moment, watching the caramel highlights glitter. That night had been huge for her. It had been huge for him, but even huger for her. That was what she was trying to say. He'd expected too much, too soon.

No matter what he wanted her reaction to be, whatever he'd expected....it required some kind of action. An action she hadn't been ready to take. But now she was.

Now she was.

He nodded. "I'm honored."

She blushed again and looked down.

"I'm serious...Pam, I just...this is the last I'm going to say about it all night...You're right - I did expect a response...but - but I just... I couldn't think straight anymore. I just..." fuck. His throat got tight and he felt like he'd felt that night. Just on the verge of losing it. Do not cry damn it.

Pam's eyes glittered with the same tears as he sighed and looked away.

"You know...I kind of want to tear Karen's hair out..."

His sudden burst of laughter that came from him seemed to echo in the small pace. The comment had come out of nowhere. He'd been on the verge of tears of sadness, and suddenly he was laughing so hard that he couldn't speak. He could hear her giggling as he pulled away from her. He doubled over with laughter. When he tried to talk he sounded like he'd been smoking for 20 years.

"What?" He said laughing. "I'm pouring my heart out and you're...."

She leaned against the countertop and smiled at him cheekily, twirling a curl around her finger. "Sorry...I couldn't help it. You looked so sad..."

His eyes widened and he shook his head, his face red, tears in his eyes.

Pam glanced out the window and chewed on her bottom lip, "She lives a few blocks that way, right? Maybe I could go beat her up."

Jim took a deep breath and straightened to his full height. "Calm down Beesly...She's probably still in New York and believe me...you've got nothing to worry about anymore."

All silliness aside now, Pam waited for him, her eyes wide and expectant. They hadn't really discussed what had happened. At least not in any real detail.

"It's...it's over."

She swallowed hard. "I'm sorry."

"Come on..."

"No," She smiled a little in spite of herself. "I mean...really...this is so...Everything happened so fast and I am...I'm sorry you're hurting."

He found her eyes. "I'm not hurting so much."

Pam smiled wanly. "Yeah?"

"Yeah."

Bashfully she looked up at him from underneath her lashes. "You look tired."

He made a face. "That's ridiculous....I've only been up for...." He thought about how they'd left for the city as the sun was coming up. "Hours."

"I should let you get some sleep."

He shrugged. "I...Listen, you can't leave now. I mean we're just hitting our stride here."

She smiled.

"And besides it's almost 3 in the morning...you should just stay...I can't let you drive home this late."

.

A part of him harbored a very real fear that he'd go to sleep tonight, wake up, and realize this had all been a dream. A part of him wanted to hold her all night so that fear became an impossibility.

"I can't."

He realized by her expression that their expectations of a sleep-over were entirely different. "Oh...oh no! Pam, that's not what I meant. I'm not...jeez Pam, what kind of common hussy do you take me for? I'm suggesting that we just...you know...hang out...on the couch or something...play Parcheesi."

Pam smiled. "Snuggle?"

"Obviously...who doesn't wanna do that?"

"Seriously?" She said, when he started to move towards the couch.

"Pam, I'm not giving it up tonight so just...give it a rest."

She laughed and followed him when he held out his hand, taking it in her own. God, she loved that...holding his hand. It was her absolute new favorite thing. When they sat on the couch she could think of other favorite things...things they hadn't done yet. Thing she knew she'd love just as much...

Before she started to blush again, she tried to change the subject. "Are you gonna let me sleep on this with you? What if I steal all the change in your couch?"

"That is an odd question............besides, I only keep my change in my bed so,...since you won't be seeing that - I have nothing to worry about."

"Why do you have change in your bed?"

"Um....the Tooth fairy."

"Oh I thought maybe you'd been entertaining very cheap hookers."

"Stop."

She giggled nervously as they got comfortable on the couch. So close...they'd never sat this close before. Wow...

"Sorry," she whispered, instantly starting to play with her fingers.

"No...no, I get it...suddenly things get a little romantic and this is what we're gonna do...we're gonna pull out the shtick."

Pam's mouth fell open. She hadn't thought of that. "Really? You think that's what's happening?"

"Oh yeah. It's either that or fight."

"Or make out."

"Yes."

"So what are we gonna do?"

He turned towards her, his arm on the headrest behind her. He reached up, wove his fingers through her hair for a moment. There was so much silence...anything was possible.

He licked his lips. "I just got Nintendo Wii."

She shook her head. "No...I'm too good. You'd cry."

"Shut up...I don't think so. I think I'd win and you would.......oh - see look...look how quickly we fell back into it....did you see that," he said gesturing between them.

"But I like our shtick...I don't wanna give up our shtick."

"No, I do too...believe me Pam. I have nothing against good banter. But seriously...we're gonna have to like you know - talk like normal people and not be you know...us all the time.

"Well what would two normal people do right now?"

"Oh you mean like well adjusted, forthright, honest, witty, insanely attracted to one another people?"

"Yes...yes, what would they do?"

"They'd have sex."

"Shoot."

"Or maybe..." he said putting his feet up on the coffee table and pulling her close. "They'd just sit here in each other's company and like...wait for the sunrise."

"Oooh I like that."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah......but that's still a couple of hours away. What do we do in the mean time?"

Jim rolled his eyes around, mulling it over. "Do I have to think of everything?"

"You're the man I expect you to plan the first date."

He grinned widely. "Did you enjoy that pizza?"

She giggled. "Of course...that's exactly the kind of plan I meant."

"Well....we could get snacks."

"No. That would involve you moving...and I don't want you get to get up. You're comfy," she said laying her head on his chest.

"Oh...ok. Hmm. Well there are card games or -

"No...you suck at those."

"Pam -

"But...you're a good kisser."

He smiled in the dark.

She reached up and pushed some hair away from his eyes. "I really like your new big haircut by the way...I know I told you already - but I meant it."

"Come on..."

"No, I do...I liked the old one too, but you know...sometimes it's nice to be new - fancy."

"Sometimes."

"And sometimes it's nice to do something old too....So I like both haircuts."

"That can not possibly be. They are too completely distinct styles."

"Oh really Vidal? My bad."

"Insult me all you want, but it's an impossibility."

"It's not. I love both hairstyles because I love your hair....because I love you."

Silence settled between them for few moments while Jim reveled in that little revelation. Of course that's what all of this meant, or alluded too...but to hear her say the words aloud. That was...that was everything.

Finally - everything was ok. Who gave a crap about before? Suddenly none of it seemed to matter at all. All that mattered was the here and the now and the future.

She loved him.

Jim touched her face. "I...I think we're gonna make out."

"Really?"

"No - yeah...I think we have to."

"Well...alright.......But neither one of us are allowed to put out tonight."

"See...the old haircut...you woulda totally put out."

Pam laughed as he kissed her...but very quickly laughter was the last thing on her mind as they fell into one another. Seconds turning into minutes, which turned into more minutes.

Moments passed and he whispered things to her like how he thought her skin was amazing, and she tried to find out what he meant by that - what made it so amazing. But who cared for talking when they could have this. And when she wanted more...when she wanted to go back on what she'd said earlier about putting out, he wouldn't let her. He'd shaken his head and said things like...I don't want you to regret it...and we've got time...and I'm not going anywhere.

She liked that last one a whole lot. Neither one of them were going anywhere.

So they kissed until their lips were a bit sore, they napped a little, and they woke when a streak of gold lit the room. A new day cut through the apartment and they cuddled together to watch it before falling back to sleep on the couch...together.

Fancy and new....but just the same as they were before.