Pam sat at her vanity table, looking into the mirror. She noticed how tired she looked. She picked up her brush and started working on her hair—now gray and shorter, but still thick and shiny.

There was a crash somewhere in the house, followed by the muffled tones of a mother reprimanding her child. She smiled a bit, despite wondering what was broken. Pam loved having the kids and grandkids in the house.

Hair done, Pam stood and took her outfit from the hanger on the back of the door. She loved this suit. It was dark gray and perfectly tailored. Jim had picked it out the last time they’d gone to the mall. “You might have a job interview,” he’d joked. They both knew why she needed it.

She adjusted the skirt, and buttoned the blouse. Her hands were shaking, just a little. Age? Exhaustion? Nerves? She hated to be the center of attention. She always had.

Pam pulled on her jacket and adjusted the collar. With a sigh, she sat back down at the mirror and fixed her makeup.

Another crash from downstairs, and another sharp comment from an adult. Jamie, this time. Ahh, now you’ve done it. You’ve made your dad angry, Pam thought to herself. She thought they ought to let the kids play. They were just kids.

And anyway, she liked the noise. She was dreading how quiet the house would be when everybody went home in a day or so. Pam bit her lip, trying not to think about it.

Pam chose earrings from the jewelry box. Simple diamonds, gifts from Jim more than twenty years prior. She put on her watch. And she looked down at her wedding ring.

The doorbell rang. She started to get up, but she heard someone scurrying down the hall toward the front door. A brief exchange, and the door closed.

There was a tap at her door. “Come in,” Pam said.

“It’s almost time to leave for the service, Mom,” Lucy said. Her eyes were red, but she looked as put-together as she always did.

“Who was at the door?” Pam asked.

“More flowers. From the Schrutes this time.”

Pam smiled. “That’s nice.” She paused. “Oh, God, what do they look like?”

Lucy laughed, slightly. “They’re fine. Very normal.”

“Oh. OK, good.” She nodded. “I’ll be right down.”

Lucy disappeared down the hall. Pam took a deep breath, and looked around the room. At the closet that she would soon half-empty. At the medical equipment that was no longer needed. At the bed that she now slept in alone.

“Oh, God. I miss you so much, Jim. But because you loved me so much...I know I will be OK."