PILLOW TALK

"Oh...here's these," Jim said plunking down an old beat up tool box on the dining room table.

Pam glanced up from her sketching, blowing her bangs out of her eyes. "What's that?"

"Oh...those are hammers Pam," he said opening up the box. "See?"

Sure enough, the entire tool box was full of nothing but hammers. Small hammers, big hammers, old hammers, new hammers....

"Yeah...I....why exactly?" Pam said looking up at him. "Did...are we hanging something?"

"Oh...um - not sure. You told me not to forget them...though. So...here they are."

Pam's frown lines deepened. "I never said anything about hammers....I don't need any hammers."

"Hmm..." Jim said sitting down next to her. "Well I thought that you did...I mean because you've told me every night for the past week....not to forget the hammers. So...I figured you really needed them for something. Not sure what....Maybe you planned on hanging some new art...can't be sure. Anyway --  just knew that you desperately needed hammers. So...here," he said lifting the lid of the tool box again with a smile. "Hammers."

Pam continued to look at him as if he'd lost his mind. So he had to do it....Had to.

Jim pulled a small tape recorder out of his jean pocket, pushed the play button and grinned. "Oh yeah...this part is good-

"What?"

But Pam quickly quieted. She realized that she was listening to the sound of her own muffled voice requesting hammers quite plainly...and quite adamantly.

"Right...yeah," Jim was saying in response to the tape. "See...hammers...oh yeah, this is the part where you told me if I didn't get them you'd kick my ass."

"Oh my God!" Pam said gasping as she leaned closer. It was true!

Jim bit down on his lip to keep from laughing at her expression. "Yeah...really violent.......A little afraid that you might actually -

"Sssh," Pam said shushing him. She leaned in even closer to hear the tape and Jim smiled. The tape recorded Pam was currently reading him the riot act about hammers and their need for them. Why didn't they have them in the first place?  

Jim leaned back a bit in his seat, and Pam pulled his wrist closer in order to hear every word.  

"See...so demanding," Jim whispered as the tape played on.

Pam giggled, "Oh my God...What the heck am I talking about?...I didn't know that I did that..."

Jim frowned for a moment. How could she possibly not know that she...

He put that question back to bed before it ever completely rose. He probably already knew the answer anyway, right? It wasn't like Roy was the most attentive guy in the world.

Jim licked his lips and put his other hand on the table. He wove his fingers through hers. "Ok...but listen...the funniest part is coming up...you literally turned to me - eyes wide open and told me I needed to go and get them...Pam it was the craziest thing. I totally thought you were awake!"

"Oh my God...No way. That could not have possibly happened! "

Pam guffawed at the expression on Jim's face as he went on... "Oh but it did Pam...so then I turn to you and say ‘Pam I am not going to the hardware store at 3 a.m....and then...

And then she heard it; her own voice via tape recorder, saying ‘Kiss my ass.'

Pam gasped and covered her mouth.

"How do you think I felt?"

Pam leaned forward and draped her arms around his neck. Laughing even as she said, "Oh my God...I'm so sorry..."

"Well yeah...I can see how broken up you are..." Jim was saying as he pulled away.

"I don't know what to say," Pam said, unable to stop her laughter.

Jim started laughing too. Her happiness was the most contagious disease. "Say you know what the heck were gonna do with all these hammers!"

"I have no idea..." Pam said, crying now.

Jim took a deep breath and glanced at the box. "Well you better come up with something Beesly, ‘cause I'm not taking all these back to the store."

"God if I had known you'd buy me things that I talked about in my sleep I would have demanded diamonds."

Jim licked his lips and just stared at her for a moment. Silence hung in the air far longer than it should have. 

Pam looked away first. Trained her eyes on the tool box..."I think I'll start demanding all kinds of things in my sleep."

Jim cleared his throat. Diamonds? An entirely different kind of box...

"Fancy New Beesly...making demands," he said finally, propping his chin on his hand. "Like what?"

"Hmm...I could start demanding sex."

"Interesting. I can readily supply an entire box of that."

"You don't have to go the hardware store for it?" Pam said giggling at her own attempt at a ‘that's what she said' kind of joke.

Jim shook his head. "So lame."