I LOVE... EVERYTHING

"Uh-oh...You don't look so good."

Jim stumbled across the threshold, barely making it to the couch. He fell face first into the cushions.  His feet dangled towards the carpet at an odd angle.

"I've been poisoned."

The words were muffled and Pam smiled knowingly as she neared the couch. "Pretty sure you're just drunk."

Pam pulled off his black baseball cap and ran her fingers through his sweaty hair. "Are you gonna be sick?" she asked, crouching down on the carpet to untie his shoes. "I've never seen Jim Halpert like this..."

"No......I wish...It usually just stays inside and makes me feel terrible....How was your night?....Did you have a good chick-flick marathon?...I wish I woulda stayed home...home, home, home...hmmmm..."

It was the first time she'd ever seen him like this. Was it possible that he could remain Mr. Sensitive and Caring, even when bombed out of his mind?  That wasn't possible, right?

Soon he'd be yelling, doing a little cursing, apologizing profusely and then coming on to her in a truly obnoxious way. Then after all that he'd pass out. Right? That was the way things went with drunk boyfriends...

"So you and Marc had a good time?...Turn over," Pam said, instructing him. Jim covered his eyes with his forearm and did as he was told....slowly.

"I hate Marc...I hate good times," Jim slurred. "Why did he do this to me?"

"It really blows when friends pry your mouth open and pour beer down your throat...I know."

Jim giggled. Yes, giggled. "Beesly..."

.

She waited for him to finish his sentence but nothing ever came. So, she laughed at him.

"I love you Pam...I love your laugh...I love your...everything," He said gesturing wildly. "Everything is so...great."

"I love you too, Jim...let's get these off of you, huh?" she said unzipping and then starting valiantly to tug at his jeans. Quite the challenge on such a long pair of legs that weren't really cooperating with her.

"I think I'm gonna need your help here, Lohan." She said looking up at him, but he suddenly wasn't smiling anymore. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing," he said, but his voice sounded like the weight of the world was suddenly on his shoulders.

"Do I need to grab a bucket?" Pam asked, starting to get to her feet...

"No...just what you said," he sighed. "You know how...sometimes you say something and then it reminds you of something you said before or someone else said before....It just reminded me of something you said before...to Roy...once...."

Pam glanced up as she finally managed his jeans past his feet.  She hadn't been expecting that...

His fingertips pulled at some loose threads on the couch, but he kept missing them, his eyes unfocused.

Whatever it was he wanted to talk about, he hadn't felt able to when he wasn't inebriated.  She wasn't sure she wanted to know, but she bit the bullet anyway.

"...Yeah?..."

"You said you wanted to get him into a tub....that was the worst."

Oh.

"The worst, the worst, the worst..." Jim seemed to mumble to himself.  "I hated that."

If she didn't remember exactly what he was talking about, she might've laughed at his child-like tone. But she did remember.  Who could forget such a strategic maneuver?

A basketball game, a co-worker she'd found incredibly hot on and off the court, a desperate attempt to remind herself that she was going home with the guy on the other team...a last ditch effort to make sure Jim knew she wasn't interested...not in the slightest.  Beyond eager to convince herself of the same thing...

Yeah...She was taking her man home...for a bath.  Pam looked down at Jim as she sat on the edge of the couch, her fingers toying with his hair. Like a sweaty haired little kid...

"I'm sorry."

Jim looked at her, smiled suddenly. It was the oddest transition in expressions and it made her heart swell.

"Is'sok," he mumbled, reaching for her hair.  His fingertips fiddled with the ends. "I bought you something s..sostupid that weekend."

She felt herself smile as she lay her head on his chest. "At the outlet mall?...What did you get me?"

"Stuuupid."

"I know," she said letting her finger trail back and forth along his bicep. "Tell me anyway."

He started cracking up. "A pair of Keds."

She grinned at him and then pushed herself to her knees, pressing a kiss to his chin.  "How did you know my size?"

"Oh...I knew a lot of very pathetic things Pam...."

A weekend at the lake that had been fun enough...but in the back of her mind she'd still been wondering what it would have been like to have spent the weekend with someone else.  She'd allowed herself to dwell on those thoughts only when Roy had been in the lake with his brother. Only when she'd been on the shore, pretending to read a book. That had made it ok at the time...She'd never allowed herself to dwell when Roy was actually talking to her, touching her...

Her eyes traveled over Jim's long frame on the couch because now...now she could dwell all she wanted. She allowed her eyes to linger on what she knew was beneath the Sixers t-shirt that he wore, the white boxer briefs....

"Halpert?"

"Yeah..."

"...I think we need to get you in bed."

"So you can take advantage of me?..."

"Definitely maybe," She said smiling. "You're pretty sexy right now."

Jim licked his lips. "K...but you're gonna have to do all the work."

Pam sighed in exasperation. "Fax this invoice Pam, take off my pants Pam...my work is never done."

"You have to kiss me first," Jim said tapping his finger to his lips. "I like kissing....and remember I'm not easy."

"So this is what happens when you're drunk? You kinda turn into a girl?"

"No...the last time I got this drunk, I broke some things...it was very manly."

"Oh yeah? What'd you break?....Lift up," she said. He followed her instruction to sit up even as he talked...

"That fucking band...the Fray...I hate that band."

"Raise your arms," Pam said, pulling his t-shirt over his head.

"My sister bought the CD for me though......every fucking song on it reminded me of you...Over and over again I played it....So one night...in Stamford...like when I first moved there, there it was," he said staring up at the ceiling. The oddest expression of wonderment at his own memory settled across his features. "I pulled it out of my box of CDs and I took it into the kitchen and then..." he started laughing so hard, she could barely make out his next words. "I went back upstairs and got my toolbox...a hammer...then I came down and beat the shit out of it."

Pam nodded slowly, letting that sink in. "...You wanna break something tonight?" She said, tears suddenly shining in her eyes. She dashed them away. "I've got a couple of CD's you can pound the shit out of if you want...."

He frowned and sunk down on the couch again, turning towards her.  His frown morphed into a smile as he reached out for her hair again, twirling a curl around his finger. "No...I don't want to break anything...I'm too happy."

God. She smiled at him, leaned into his hand when he touched her cheek. Pulled his fingers to her lips and pressed a kiss to each knuckle.

"Pam...you're so beautiful...Do you know? I just..." he sighed, seemingly overwhelmed with it. "I can't even think...what to..."

"Oh my goodness..." Pam said shaking her head. She could've passed it off as just the liquor talking, but she knew it wasn't. She knew he really felt that way...the liquor had just loosened his tongue a little.  He said things like that when he was stone sober too, but typically not with this much abandon.

"...Can you walk?" She asked standing up and dabbing quickly at the corners of her eyes.

"I think so," Jim sighed, standing up wobbly.

So adorable.  It was a thought she had never once had about Roy when he was drunk.

He leaned against her as they walked towards their bedroom. Jim sat down slowly on the bed, and then rolled into his place.

"I hate.......this is why I don't...." he never finished his sentence. He just became very interested in snuggling with his pillow.

"I'm gonna just grab you some Advil and a tall glass of water...and then I'm going to come back and touch you in your private areas...Our little secret, Jim...ok?"

"Yeah," he said mumbling into his pillow. "Water...and secrets...Wow, I love this pillow, Pam. You pick the best......You're the best roommate I ever had......no poison...just sex."

"Win-win."

"Win," Jim mumbled.

Pam pressed a kiss to his forehead. "I'll be right back."

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