It was a rather lazy Saturday at the Halpert house. The parentals had gone to the grocery store, and the boys were still slumped in their beds. Ben woke up finally, the distant memory of his mom coming into his room, demanding he join the living, came back to him suddenly. He felt a large yawn escape his lips as he stretched, rolled over, and winced at the blinding light. His mom had opened the blinds. Ironic, since she was trying to make him blind. The alarm clock read 11:00 AM.

He yanked his covers off and slid sloppily out of the bed to walk towards the bathroom. Maybe he'd shower. Possibly brush his teeth. Possibly. He wasn't sure, no decisions on hygiene would be made right away. It was Saturday.

He opened his room door and stumbled still half sleep down the hall. A quick turn and he found the bathroom. Honestly, he went back to sleep for a few minutes somewhere in there, as he stood there relieving himself, only jerking awake as his head tilted back.

Too.damn.early. It should be illegal to get up before noon.

He decided Fruit Loops taste better after you brush your teeth. So he did, and then stomped down the stairs for breakfast.

Jon was sitting at the counter, eating from a large mixing bowl. One of mom's cake bowls.

"Morning."

"Umph," Ben replied.

Jon studied his brother as he slowly moved around the kitchen, opening the cupboards to get a huge bowl, a spoon, and then over to the fridge to get some milk.

He said nothing as Ben sat next to him, reaching for the box of Fruit Loops. He took another bite of his own cereal and didn't seem to notice Ben slamming down the box.

"It's empty."

"How observant of you."

Ben glowered. "Why didn't you say anything?"

"I figured you were a smart boy, you could figure it out for yourself."

"I hate you."

"I know," Jon shrugged as Ben jumped angrily out of his seat and back to the fridge to scrounge for breakfast.

After another hearty spoonful of the coveted cereal, Jon looked up to see Ben making Peanut Butter and Jelly sandwiches. He made three, and then shoved one promptly in his mouth.

"You're becoming quite a chumbster there, Benny."

Ben stopped chewing and swallowed the lump of food down his throat. "What?"

"Since you aren't practicing anymore and you eat like a Sumo Wrestler... you're gaining weight. But hey, who am I to judge? Girls like you for your personality."

Ben chugged down a glass of milk and frowned. "I am not fat."

"I didn't say you were fat, I said you were chubby."

"That's what you call fat people and yeah...Your mom," Ben replied.

Jon blinked. "Wait, so you're my brother...so she's like your mom too."

"I didn't mean-"

"Sure you didn't. You meant to say my mom, who had me and then had you a few years later, and incidently is your mom too."

"Whatever... Just...shut it...This started with you declaring me fat."

Jon sighed. "Nevermind, forget I said anything. Eat your half of loaf of sandwiches."

Ben looked down at his stomach, and didn't like what he saw. He noticed he was getting a bit of a gut, which was totally weird since he had only quit the team a few weeks ago. He rather enjoyed sitting around the house in the afternoons instead of being under the evil vengeful eye of Coach "Redblotch" Anderson. Sure he might have a soda or two or five as he laid around playing video games and devouring enough Doritos to feed a small third world country. He was free to be lazy, no more practice, no more ball. He could lounge all he wants. Dad had repeatedly tried to see if he needed to go talk to the Coach, but Ben kept insisting he just needed time.

And by time he meant, he wasn't sure he was ready to give up doing nothing. Nothing was a fun thing to do. Most of his high school years have been wrapped up in practices. But now he could see the consequences of being a couch potato. Now he was able to just chill-lax instead of any physical work.

And now he was staring down at the consequences.

"Hey man, don't worry about it. Beer guts or any type of guts...are sexy. Poke it out , be proud." Jon replied taking his empty bowl to the sink.

Ben shook his head. "That's what she said! Okay though, seriously, Ugh...I don't want to be fat."

"So why don't you go back to playing ball before you have to go on Maury to get him to cut you out of the house should you get like...400lbs."

"Shutup Jon."

Jon nodded. "Fine I will. Skinny jeans will be out soon anyway. But look, I want to play ball later, you should come out and join me. I know it requires walking... but trust me when I say, walking is okay. Everyone does it."

Ben. "I don't want to play ball ever again."

Jon crossed his arms. "And why not? Because of some asshole Coach?"

"No because...I don't know. I just don't care anymore," Ben replied looking down.

"You talk to Dad about this?"

Ben shook his head and kept staring at the floor. "No. I know he wouldn't freak or anything, but I'm guessing he liked having a son who wants to play basketball with him. You were such a disappointment probably...playing football and all."

Jon snorted and Ben continued. "I don't know. I just feel like I needed a break and they might not understand that."

"You know that's not how Mom or Dad work..."

Ben shook his head. "Maybe not. But I feel like I would disappoint him."

Jon looked intensely at his brother for a moment. "You saying that supports my theory you were adopted. If you knew anything about Dad, you'd know he would never think that way."

"I dunno. He comes to all my games and we practice outside sometimes. I'm just worried."

"Maybe you gained fat in your head too, because you say some really off the wall things, like Dad would be disappointed in you. he comes to the games to support you. He'd do the same if you were in some sort of wimpy sport like Tennis or Lacrosse. Dad would never do that. He'd support your decision. "

At that moment, Jim walked in carrying two handfuls of grocery bags. He looked oddly at the boys, obviously coming in at the end of the convo." What would Dad support?"

"Ben's Crystal meth lab. He's building one in his room and he needs the funding." Jon replied.

Jim looked at Ben. "You want me as a silent partner?"

"Dad..." Ben said sighing but Jon interrupted him.

"And he's thinking about changing his name to Beverly," Jon stated as Ben elbowed him.

Jim nodded and placed the bags down. He looked between the boys and noted Ben's demeanor. "Interesting. Jon, want to go help Mom with the bags?"

"I really don't have a choice, do I?"

"Sure you don't," Jim shook his head and Jon eased past him. He turned back to Ben. "What's going on?"

Ben looked at him. "I-I... I wanted to tell you--"

"Jim I forgot the garbage bags." Pam replied as she walked into the kitchen holding bags.

"We got garbage bags. Right after we got the Glade PlugIns."

Pam looked confused. "I was sure it was after the Glades but before the butter. Maybe they mixed it up."

"Maybe," Jim agreed and watched her exit back out towards the car. He waited a pause and then looked at Ben. "Ben you know you can talk to me, right? About anything?"

"Yeah."

"Then talk."

"Nothing to talk about," Ben lied. "Oh I got one. Where do babies come from?"

Jim contemplated for a moment. "Beet Farms. Now what's the real question?"

Ben bit his lip and was honestly going to talk to his dad, but then Jon came in. "Mom forgot garbage bags."

"I know, I covered that with her."

"And she forgot to tell me she already told you. She seems to be forgetting alot of things." Jon replied, mosing on back to the car. "Wonder if she knows who we are...well... who Ben is."

Ben shook his head and focused back on his conversation with his dad. "I just feel like, maybe I shouldn't play basketball, I'm no where are good as you. I'm just...not into it anymore. Then the coach hates me. I made out with his daughter, or stepdaughter or something."

Jim stopped putting the groceries away. "You did what?"

"I kissed his daughter. I didn't know it was her. She's new and I barely knew her name."

Jim gave a sigh. "Wow. Let's...not tell him about that, okay? And secondly, me being disappointed in you, not true. Never true. You're better than I was when I was your age, you have a real talent, but if it's not you Ben...then..."

Ben groaned. "That was a hundred years ago when you played! I'm talking about NOW. I'm just disillusioned with the whole thing."

He watched his father get confused. "Im only 48.  And disillusioned? I've never heard you use that word before. In anything."

"It's something I picked up from a book I read, or something."

"It wasn't Harry Potter was it?"

"God, no. What do I do Dad?"

"It's up to you. I mean, don't quit because you aren't hitting every three pointer. Sometimes you have to hang in there and it'll work itself out. But if it's something else, and it's not what you want..."

"Maybe. I have a hard time making choices."

"You get that from your mom. She only wised up when she married me. Look, if you're sure you don't want to to do it, I'll back you."

"Okay-" Ben stared only to be interrupted by Jon and Mom.

"We found the garbage bags," Jon muttered.

"Under the seat," His mom replied.

"And we avoid an emergency! Whew, good thing we found them. The ungodly things we would have to do with the garbage," Jim spoke in overexaggeration. He looked back at Ben. "Just...think on it. If it's what you definitely want to do, I get it but I want you to know we'll help you as much as we can."

Ben nodded.

"Wait, what are you guys talking about? What's wrong with Ben?" Pam asked as she turned to look at her son.

"Nothing, just...I think I'm gonna take a break from sports. Plus, I'm getting fat."

Jim and Pam looked at him and then at each other. "You're no such thing. Who told you that?"

They all looked over at Jon who shrugged. "I just said he might want to invest in sweatpants. I never said he was outright fat."

Ben sighed. "I'm Jabba the Hut fat. I look like I'm pregnant. I've developed a beer gut and I haven't even gotten to drink any beer."

"And you won't until you're 21 and over," Pam said sternly.

Jim patted Ben on his back. "No... you just.... you just need to lay off the sodas and chips after school."

Pam smiled and held up a bag of her lunch mini carrots. "Eat carrots instead. They're orange like Doritos!"

Ben stared at her. "If only I got to be tall and lanky like Dad and Jon. But no... I get to look like Uncle Paul before he lost his hair."

Pam frowned. "Your Uncle Paul gives you thirty dollars every Christmas. Be nice."

Jon shook his head. "Then he jipped us, last year we got only twenty five dollars."

"I'm sorry my family is short," Pam replied sadly. "We come from a long background of height challenged persons."

"It's totally Hobbit like honestly, Mom." Ben sighed.

"Don't tease your mom's inability to ride adult rides. It's not nice." Jim chuckled as Pam smacked his arm.

They then kissed each other and the boys groaned in disgust. Jim quirked an eyebrow. "How do you think you got here? With a couple of these..."

He kissed Pam again and Jon made a gagging noise. They laughed.

Jim leaned against the counter and looked at his boys. "I tell you what. How about we go play ball later? All four of us? Halpert Family day? Wow...that sounds cheesy, but really let's do it. Mom can show you how the NBA All Stars learned all her moves."

Ben nodded and pushed himself off the counter. "Yeah, okay. I'm going back to bed. I can't be up this early in the morning."

Pam frowned. "You're what? It's almost noon."

"Almost doesn't count," Ben shrugged and made his way upstairs. He'd think on it like Dad said. Part of him missed basketball, his friends after school, his relationship with his Dad, and most importantly...the chicks will dig it.