from Karen Filippelli <kafil1078@gmail.com>
to JT <sweetums56442@gmail.com>
date October 29, 2007 6:08 PM
subject Oh. My. God.
I'll give you one guess as to who showed up at my work today.
Yep, that's right.
I guess I should start from the beginning. The camera crew doing the documentary called last week and asked if they could come up for the day to film me calling Stanley (the salesman from Scranton who called me last week asking about transferring). I begrudgingly agreed, partly because I wanted to make sure that any future viewers of this TV show know that I am still alive and doing great.
Anyway, I waited for them to arrive to call Stanley. That call went well, and I was pretty sure he was going to take the transfer. But then Michael Scott calls me a little while later, accusing me of stealing his people. Whatever. I end the call and ten minutes later he calls my best salesman trying to get HIM to transfer down to Scranton. I had a good laugh over that.
Lunchtime comes around and I thought the camera guys were leaving for the day. I went out with one of the ladies from the office for about 45 minutes, and when we came back I saw a red convertible PT Cruiser parked in the parking lot. With a guy holding a camera in the backseat, and the camera pointed at me. I thought it was weird that they would be covertly filming me, so I walked over to the car and saw someone lying down in the front seat, obviously hiding.
It was Jim. Wait, not just Jim, but Jim wearing a warehouse uniform. With a woman's name on it. Oh, and he was wearing a fake moustache too.
I am not kidding.
I knocked on the window and asked what he was doing there. At first he tried to avoid answering, and then he made something up, but then I heard the sound of Michael Scott coming through the walkie talkie in his hand.
Seriously, could I make this stuff up?
Turns out Michael, Dwight and Jim thought they could get revenge on me or whatever for "poaching" Stanley. When I went inside Michael and Dwight were trapped under my copier, which they were trying to steal by pushing it down the stairs. Don't ask.
I considered calling the police and pressing charges, but I was feeling charitable. I had the three of them in my office and asked them what the hell they thought they were doing. Michael and Dwight replied with something idiotic, and after a minute, I just wanted them to leave. When those two stooges got up to leave, I asked the third one to stay back.
I asked him if he was still into this immature middle school bullshit and he made a joke about trying to quit. Always taking things so seriously, that one. So then I told him that if he wanted to see me so badly, he could have just called.
That's when he opened his mouth and started rambling about how no, he didn't want to see me, that he and Pam are still together and they are doing GREAT. That's when I lost it and tore into him about how GREAT it was that things are going SO FUCKING WELL FOR HIM AND HIS FANTASTIC GIRLFRIEND. Can you freaking believe the nerve of this guy? I cried for weeks when he dumped me. WEEKS. For what? He's obviously a fucked-up loser. I can't believe I couldn't see it before.
So, while I should be in a pissed off rage right now, it was actually sort of cathartic for me, because I saw him for what he really is. And that him dumping me was the best thing that could have happened to me. I am in a much better place right now, literally and figuratively. I don't need to waste any more time wondering what might have been.
Yeah, I'm good.
:)
Karen
Author's Chapter Notes:
Branch Wars!
Disclaimer: All publicly recognizable characters, settings, etc. are the property of their respective owners. The original characters and plot are the property of the author. The author is in no way associated with the owners, creators, or producers of any media franchise. No copyright infringement is intended.
Chapter End Notes:
The end. Thanks for reading. :-)
ExtremelyGruntled is the author of 20 other stories.
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