Jim and Pam had laughed about it at first.
Not because it was funny, because it really wasn't.
They laughed because it was so crazy.
Showing up at work with a young woman, announcing that this woman was your girlfriend and then proceeding to kiss her in front of an audience despite how uncomfortable everyone was...
It was something Michael might have done.
The fact that it was Toby was what made it so strange and Jim and Pam had made a few comments about it that night, wondering what was up with that. Who that woman was.. If she even was his girlfriend.
Toby was in love with Pam, Jim knew. And maybe that was just his way of dealing with it.
Toby was also really uncooperative with the relationship disclosure forms and was, in general, snippy towards Jim at the Finer Things Club meeting.
Jim wasn't that bothered by it. To be honest, he didn't really think about it much. He was still in that blissful stage of being with Pam and work was... not horrible. Life was good.
One day they were having some sort of party celebrating something or other and he was standing chatting with Pam when Toby walked over.
"Hey Toby," Jim said pleasantly.
"Hey," Toby said. "Look, Dwight wanted me to talk to you about... well about several things you may or may not have done to him."
Jim looked over at Dwight, standing in a corner, smirking at him.
"Do we have to do this now?" Jim asked, irritated.
Yes, he was irritated. But at Dwight who had been insufferable lately, not at Toby who was only doing his job.
Jim saw the slightest flash of anger in Toby's eyes before he said, "No, of course we don't. Whenever you have the free time, Jim."
Toby sounded very snippy again.
Snippiness and snarkiness seemed so out-of-place on Toby.
It was like getting attitude from a puppy.
"Jim," Michael said coming up behind him. "Is Toby bugging you? Cause I'll bounce him from the party. I don't even know what he's doing here in the first place."
Toby sighed. "No need. I'll leave."
Still irritated, Jim took his time. He had a few cookies, drank some punch, goofed around with Pam. Then, when he was ready, he walked back to the annex.
Toby had his back to him, typing up what looked like some kind of report.
"Okay," Jim said. "I'm here. What did I do to Dwight this time?"
"No, we'll do it later," Toby said, not taking his eyes off the computer screen. "I know now's not a good time for you."
So snippy.
"What's with you?" Jim asked, impatient. "Seriously. It's getting old."
"Sorry," Toby said, still looking at the screen.
Jim didn't leave. Finally Toby sighed again and turned around so he was facing Jim. "What?"
He didn't sound snippy anymore.
Jim was about to say something, but stopped as he looked at Toby. Really looked at him. And Jim realized something.
Toby looked awful.
Exhausted. Down to your bones exhausted.
Circles under the eyes.
He looked older.
Jim tried to remember how old Toby was. Forty maybe? His birthday had been several months ago. Per tradition, Michael had "celebrated" by yelling "Happy Birthday, Creep" to him in the parking lot on a Friday night.
And then Jim remembered how Toby had hesitatingly yet somewhat annoyingly asked to be included in the birthdays celebration the day Jim had been in charge. Jim also remembered how, stressed out, he had dismissed Toby, later mocking him and his soft yet kind of whiny voice to the camera.
That had not been one of Jim's shining moments.
He and Toby used to sit together until Michael separated them for talking too much. Jim used to babysit Sasha; Toby had helped him move.
They used to socialize outside of work.
They hadn't done anything like that in awhile.
"You've been acting so weird lately," Jim said.
"I know. And unprofessional."
Jim had not been expecting that. The immediate acknowledgment. "I know," Jim said awkwardly, beginning a conversation he did not want to have, "that you're in love with Pam."
"I'm not."
"You're not?" Jim asked, confused. "But you wouldn't let us sign the documents and you brought in some girl..."
"I know," Toby said, cutting him off. "But I'm...not in love with her. I like her a lot. A crush...whatever," Toby mumbled, looking down, embarrassed. "I don't know. I just liked hoping that something could happen. That hope made coming into work easier. And when the hope was gone..." Toby frowned again, shaking his head.
Jim really hadn't been expecting all that.
Toby seemed a little surprised by his admission as well.
"I'm sorry," Jim said uncomfortably.
Even though he didn't quite know what he was apologizing for.
"Don't. You don't need to apologize for anything." Toby gave him a quick, forced-looking smile. "And I should get back to work. I have a mountain of complaints from Dwight to sort through. Maple syrup, Jim? Really?"
"He was being really annoying that day. But I used Grade A. Nothing but the best."
Jim grinned and Toby smiled a little. More naturally this time.
Toby's smile faded. "I'm really sorry, Jim. For how I've been acting."
"Apology accepted."
So that was easy. But Jim still felt a little unsettled. He had the feeling that something else had to be going on with Toby and his recent odd behavior, something more than just an unrequited crush.
And Jim had to ask, "It's not just Pam, is it?"
Toby met his eyes, looking as if he was debating saying anything, before confirming sadly, "No. It's not just Pam."
Neither of them said anything and Jim wondered if he should just go to back to the party and leave Toby alone with his work.
But then he thought about how miserable Toby seemed.
And he didn't feel right just leaving.
Instead he went over to Kelly's side and grabbed her chair. Scooted it back so he was now sitting facing Toby.
"What's been going on?" Jim asked. "Something's obviously wrong."
"I'm okay," Toby said, clearly lying. "You should go back to the party. Everyone's probably wondering where you are."
"The party can wait."
"Kelly might be coming back soon."
"So I'll give her her chair back and sit on the floor. I'm serious. I want to know what's been going on."
Toby seemed to be wavering slightly. "I...don't know if it would be a good idea."
"It would be," Jim said. "And I'm not leaving until you talk to me."
Jim crossed his arms, showing him he meant business.
And Toby must have believed him, because, sounding resigned but at the same time looking almost relieved, he started talking.
The end
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