May 17, 2006
Jim had a lot on his mind today. First, he had accepted his job offer with Carroll High School. In the end, even though his home was in Scranton, he just couldn’t turn down an opportunity like the one that had been offered. Or so he told himself. Really, he just felt it was unhealthy to pine away over an engaged woman. If he could put some distance between them, he knew he would be able to move on. Or at least he hoped he would.
Tonight was also the West Scranton Prom. Jim had volunteered to chaperone the event. And Pam would be there, too. Apparently, she and Roy always went to these and Pam loved being able to relive their high school days. Having heard that, Jim could not be less excited about tonight, where he was sure he would have to watch Pam and Roy act like love-struck teenagers.
But Jim had volunteered and knew he had to go. At least I’ll get to see Pam in a dress, he thought. And there was another one of those thoughts that made him think he had made the right decision to go to Philadelphia. He was excited about the prospect of seeing an unavailable woman in a dress. What is wrong with me, he wondered.
Two hours later, Jim was in the ballroom of the Radisson hotel for the 2006 West Scranton Prom. The room was actually pretty nice, with a dance floor in the middle of tables set up on the outside and a DJ at the back of the room. And there she was, sitting and talking with Roy with a smile plastered on her face. She was wearing a periwinkle dress that allowed Jim to see more of her skin than he ever had and had her hair styled in looser curls than usual. She looked absolutely stunning. She was just glowing, and Jim was upset that she was that way because of Roy. But then she looked over at him, and her smile grew wider and her eyes actually brightened even more. Man, is she gorgeous. She grabbed Roy’s hand and the two of them walked over to Jim. “Hey, Jim,” Pam smiled at him.
“Hey, Pam,” Jim smiled. “Roy,” Jim said extending his hand to shake Roy’s.
“Hey, Halpert,” Roy replied.
“You look nice in your tux,” Pam said to Jim.
Jim blushed and said, “Thanks. You guys look nice, too.”
“Go to enough of these deals and you get the hang of it,” Roy answered. “I can’t even remember how many of these I’ve been to, now. Probably not too many more, though.”
Pam snapped her head to look at Roy. “Why not?”
“C’mon, Pam. When we get married we aren’t going to want to come to these anymore.”
“Why not? I love coming to prom with you.” Jim kind of wished she had kept that to herself, and Jim was trying to figure out how to escape this increasingly awkward situation.
“Pam, we’re going to be too old for this stuff soon. There’s no reason to keep coming to this kind of thing.”
“Oh,” Pam answered.
“Hey, Halpert, I didn’t get a chance to congratulate you on the basketball season. You guys did a great job,” Roy said, oblivious to Pam being upset.
“Yeah, thanks, man. The players made it happen, you know? I just tried to put them in a position to succeed…”
“Sure, you did. Halpert, I’m a coach, too. No need to be modest to me. The difference between a group that loses and a group that wins is the man in charge. And to me, that guy was you last year. Great job, man. Seriously.”
“Thanks. Well, I’m gonna go walk around a bit, say hi to people. You guys have fun.”
“Sure thing, man,” Roy said, shaking Jim’s hand again.
“Bye, Jim,” Pam whispered.
Jim had made the rounds, and a couple hours later was sitting and ‘chaperoning.’ He actually wasn’t sure what it was he was supposed to do. Unless someone got into fisticuffs, there was no way he was telling anyone what to do. “Hey.” Jim turned his head and saw Pam sit down next to him.
“Hey, Pam. How’s it goin’?”
“Um, it’s okay.”
“Where’s Roy?” Stupid question ,he thought, wanting to reach out and grab those words as soon as they left his mouth.
“Um, he was tired, so he went home, I guess. I’m going to get a ride home from Angela.”
“Oh. Okay. Well…good to have you here.”
Pam smiled at him. “Yeah, I just love these things.”
“Have you been every year since high school?”
“No. Not the first year. Roy didn’t get a job as Assistant Coach and as the shop teacher until a year after we graduated. But we’ve been every year since. It’s usually pretty nice to get dressed up and go out, but…anyway, you having fun?”
“Loads of fun. I’m going to miss everyone.”
“Well, you’ll see most of us next year, right?”
Oh, man, Jim thought, I guess now is as good a time to tell her as any…but she’s pretty upset I think so… Jim had not yet told Pam about his impending transfer. He was really not looking forward to it.
“Jim? You with me?”
“Yeah, sorry. I, um…”
“What is it?”
“Can we go outside for a couple of minutes?”
“Won’t that interfere with your chaperoning?”
“Pam…”
Pam saw the serious look on Jim’s face and said, “Sure.”
The two of them walked into the hallway to talk. Jim was very tempted to take Pam’s hand as they walked, but knew he couldn’t. “Jim, what’s up?”
“It’s not a big deal, really. I just…man, this is tough…”
“Jim, it’s me. You can tell me anything.”
Oh how I wish that were true, Jim thought. Okay, here goes. “A while ago Jan approached me and told me that a school in Philadelphia had contacted her about maybe considering me for a job there. I would be an English teacher still, but I would also get to be the head coach of the basketball team. Apparently, they had an English teacher and their basketball coach both retiring at the same time, and, well, I guess I could fill both needs. So I talked with them, and they offered me the job.”
“Wow. That’s um, that’s great. Have you decided yet, or…?”
“Yeah, I, um…I told them yes. I mean, it’s a great opportunity for me, you know? A real step up, and a challenge, and…I think it’s the best thing for me to do.”
“Sounds…great. Congratulations, Jim. You deserve it.”
“Yeah. Thanks, that means…that means a lot to me, Pam.”
“Well, it’s true.”
The two of them stood there for what seemed like minutes just staring at each other. Each had part of a smile on, but it wasn’t a full smile, and it was put there only to make the other feel better. Really, neither of them was happy about this new job in Philadelphia. Finally, Pam broke the silence. “Well, if you are really going to leave me to fend off Michael and Dwight all by myself, you at least owe me a dance.”
Jim smiled at her. “If you insist. And I am really am sorry. About the whole, leaving you out to dry thing, I mean,” Jim said, looking down at the floor.
“Let’s just forget that for now and have fun,” Pam said to him.
“Okay,” Jim said, looking back up at her and offering her his arm, which she took as the two walked back into the ballroom.
The two of them spent the better part of an hour dancing and laughing together. During the slow songs, Jim prayed that Pam could not feel his heart beating, seemingly out of his chest, as he held her. He had never been in such close proximity to her before, and it was slowly driving him crazy. Part of him felt guilty inhaling her scent and imagining she was his, but the other part of him (which won out) knew that this would be his last chance (also his only chance) to be close to her, so he just savored the moment. Their dancing ended after a slow song when Pam asked if Jim wanted to go for a little walk and take a break. Jim said sure.
The two of them walked outside toward the parking lot and ended up sitting on a bench with each other for a little while staring up at the starry night sky until Pam again broke the silence. “Whatcha thinking about over there?”
I’m thinking about how I’m in love with you and how much I will miss you. “Nothing really. Just…I think I’m going to miss it around here.”
“Aww, are you scared to leave, Dwight?”
Jim chuckled. “No, not that. I won’t miss that at all.”
“What then? Michael?”
Jim smiled again. “No, not Michael. I just…I’m going to miss you, Pam.”
“Oh,” Pam smiled at Jim, finally looking at him. “I’ll miss you, too, Jim.”
“Yeah…it’s just…” Jim looked at Pam, then, and it hit him again just how beautiful she was and how much he really did love her. “I’m in love with you, Pam.” Whoa! Where did that come from? Did I say that out loud?
Pam looked shocked and, quite frankly, terrified. “What? Jim…”
“Pam, I’m in love with you,” Jim said again. Now that it was out there, he wasn’t going to run from it, even though a small part of him wanted to.
“Jim…you’re not…you’re not making sense. You aren’t…I mean…”
“I know this isn’t the best timing and everything, and I know this might be weird to hear or whatever and we haven’t really known each other for all that long…but it’s true. I am, Pam. And I needed you to know. Once.”
“Well, I, um…I can’t…”
Jim looked down. “Yeah…”
Pam reached out and grabbed Jim’s arm. “Jim, you just…you have no idea what your friendship means to me and…”
“C’mon, Pam. Don’t do that. I don’t want to do that. I wanna be more than that.”
“I, um, I can’t. I’m really sorry if you misinterpreted things. It’s probably my fault.”
“Not your fault,” Jim said, standing up and wiping away a tear with his right arm, the one that Pam had been holding. He hoped Pam couldn’t see that in the dark. “I’m sorry I misinterpreted our, uh, friendship.” Jim started to walk away from her, ready to run home and just hide under his covers. Maybe hit the bottle.
“Jim, wait.”
“What?” Jim asked in a soft voice, turning back to face her.
“I really am sorry. You really do mean a lot to me. It’s just…I’ve been with Roy forever and…I just don’t think I can leave him.”
“It’s fine, Pam. I understand. I, um, I probably shouldn’t have said anything. Look, you won’t have to worry about me or anything. I’m moving to Philly, so...yeah.” Jim turned to walk away again.
“Jim?” Jim stopped again, but only half turned around this time.
“Yeah?”
“I really am going to miss you.”
Jim gave a very small, defeated smile and walked away from Pam again. As Jim walked away, Pam sat twisting her engagement ring around her finger.
Author's Chapter Notes:
Remember that I added multiple chapters again today starting with chapter 18.
Some of this may look familiar…
Some of this may look familiar…
Chapter End Notes:
Sorry for the cliffhanger of sorts. I'm tweaking the end of the story a bit and it should be up soon.
