November 1979
“Oooh, excuse me. I can’t seem to get used to driving this belly around.” The slight (other than the belly) woman apologized to a taller lady with a matching protruding stomach.
The taller woman laughed. “Oh, I know what you mean. This one here is my second and I still feel like I’m in someone else’s body.”
The slight woman smiled, nodding vigorously. “Yes! Exactly!” She patted her belly. “The little muffin in here is my first, and it’s something new everyday.”
Her new friend’s eyes twinkled. “It’s like that when they come out too. When are you due?”
“January 10th. You?”
“January 24th.”
They both laughed. The tall woman started in realization.
“Oh, excuse me,” she said. “How rude of me.” She extended her hand. “Larissa Halpert.”
The other woman shook Larissa’s hand warmly. “I’m Joan Beesly. Larissa, what an interesting name. It’s lovely.”
“Thank you,” Larissa smiled. “It’s from Greek mythology. My great-grandmother was from Mykonos. I’ve come to like it. As a child though, I always wanted a normal name, like Susan or Nancy or…”
“Joan,” Joan smiled. “Yes, I was always terribly normal. I remember trying to make people call me Wendy in first grade.”
Larissa laughed. “After Wendy in “Peter Pan.””
“Of course,” Joan agreed. “It was my favorite book.”
Larissa nodded knowingly. “It was mine too.” She lowered her head conspiratorially.
“Still is, actually. My little rascal at home is Peter.”
Joan grinned. “Nothing ever quite compares to the childhood favorite, does it? How old is little Peter?”
“He’s four,” Larissa replied. “He’s in an afternoon pre-kindergarten class. I take him in at 12:30 and they keep him until 5. It gives me a chance to go to my doctor, run my errands, come here to”
“Exercise for Pregnant Housewives,” Joan filled in, tugging at her magenta leotard.
Larissa chuckled. “Yes, exactly,” she replied, looking with part amusement, part disdain, at her own bright turquoise leotard. “Prenatal Aerobics. Who on Earth came up with the idea?”
“Jane Fonda, I’d imagine.”
The two women laughed.
“Joan,” Larissa said. “I was just about to go and get some decaf tea that I’ll be pretending is coffee. I’d love the company.”
Joan laughed. “It’s funny,” she said. “Usually all I drink is tea – especially herbal, but since I’ve been pregnant, I’ve had the most terrible cravings for coffee. I’ve tried to satisfy it with”
“Coffee ice cream!” Larissa interrupted, putting a hand on Joan’s arm.
“Yes!” Joan cried excitedly, clutching Larissa’s elbow. “Does it ever work for you?”
Larissa shook her head. “Never. I love coffee ice cream, especially with hot fudge, but it’s not coffee.” She patted her belly. “I’m tempted to let Smelden here go on the bottle right away just so I can get back to the caffeine faster.” She shook her head. “I’m shameful, I know.”
Joan giggled girlishly. “Smelden?”
Larissa shook her head ruefully. “Not really. That’s what Bill – that’s my husband – calls the babies while they, uh, ripen.”
“So no Smelden Halpert then?” Joan’s eyes twinkled.
“No indeed,” Larissa shook her head, her own eyes bright. She’d grown up as the second-to-last of four children, the only girl, and now lived with her husband and her own son. It was rare to find such a connection with another woman, and so instantly. “Margaret, for a girl. Meg. And James for a boy. After my husband’s parents. They’ve both passed.”
“So sorry,” Joan smiled sympathetically, tilting her head slightly in that way that so many do when expressing sympathy.
Larissa acknowledged this with a slight nod. “Thank you,” she said, a bit formally. “My father-in-law actually died when Bill was in high school. I never knew him. And Mag went about two years ago.” She smiled fondly, remembering. “We got on well enough, her and I, never any contention. We used to have lunch together every week, ‘just the girls,’ she’d say. But still, you know…”
“Mothers-in-law,” Joan smiled knowingly. “Evie, that’s mine, Evelyn, we get along too. But I get the feeling that she wants to come over and cook, to make sure I’m feeding Ed, or “my Eddie” as she calls him, well enough. Bless her, though, I could have gotten one of the terrible ones. My friend Nancy tells me her husband’s mother barely acknowledges her.”
Larissa shook her head in disappointment. “So do you know what you’re going to name – what did you call it, the little muffin?”
Joan smiled. “Theodore, for a boy. And Pamela, if she’s a girl.”
“Pamela,” Larissa rolled the word around in her mouth, tasting it. “That’s a beautiful name. And Theodore is one I would have considered if I didn’t think we should honor Bill’s parents. But at least I got my literary reference the first time around.”
“Literary reference?” Joan was holding back a smile.
Larissa took note. “Theodore Laurence, of course.”
“So that’s why your Margaret will be a Meg instead of a Maggie like your husband’s mother,” Joan nodded knowingly. “Little Women…”
“You too?” Larissa asked. Joan nodded. “So Pamela? Not Josephine or Amy? Or Wendy?”
“My closest childhood friend,” Joan answered. “I’m an only child, so Pam was like my sister when we were growing up. She lives in Chicago with her, uh…” she leaned close to Larissa and lowered her voice, “special friend, now.”
“Oh my.” Larissa was amused.
“Oh, but she’s wonderful,” Joan smiled. “She’s a flautist, a painter, a poet. Not that she makes a cent doing any of those. She teaches literature at Northwestern to pay the bills.”
Larissa nodded. “Sounds like quite the woman.”
“Oh, she is,” Joan agreed. “She’ll be Muffin’s godmother. Hopefully she’ll pass on some of that creativity. I always wished I had it, but sadly, my most artistic talent is flower arranging. I can’t even draw a straight line.”
“Straight lines, I can do,” Larissa said. “I studied architecture in college. But I remember my mother enrolling me in ballet classes, and Madame Marie LeBlanc – who was Mrs. Mary White outside of the dance school – told my mother that she’d seen baby elephants that were more graceful.”
Joan let out a laugh, a loud belly laugh, radiating from her swollen stomach and out her wide, generous mouth.
“Oh I’m sorry,” she cried, tears streaming down her cheeks, “I’m terribly sorry!”
“No,” Larissa waved off the apologies through her own laughter. “Don’t. I took a strange pride in it.”
“Baby elephants,” Joan laughed. She leaned into Larissa a bit as they both caught their breath.
“So Joan,” Larissa said. “What do you say that cup of tea?”
“Sounds lovely,” Joan answered. “But actually, I think now I’m more in the mood for”
“Baby elephant?” Larissa quipped, and it set the two women off again.
“Ice cream,” Joan managed to get out, through her gales of laughter. “I was going to say ice cream?”
“Coffee?”
Joan shook her head. “Actually, my true favorite is vanilla, with hot fudge. I’m a bit of a traditionalist. And you, coffee ice cream?”
Larissa shook her head. “Not today. Butter pecan with caramel sauce, I think.” Joan nodded her approval. “Shall we change out of these contraptions,” she gestured to the brightly colored leotards, “and be on our way?”
Joan nodded and they made their way toward the ladies’ locker room. “I can’t wait for the day I’m not walking like a penguin anymore,” she remarked.
Larissa laughed. “I’m just looking forward to having my coffee again.”
“And wine,” Joan said dreamily. “A nice glass of red wine in front of the fire.”
“Oh yes,” Larissa agreed. “Wine…”
Story Notes:
This idea came to me utterly randomly. I have no idea where it will go, if Dunder Mifflin will be involved, anything.
Each chapter will be one day in a new year. I had no plans to write a long story, but this one just showed itself to me. I should also say ahead of time that I'm very busy at work, so apologies in advance for any updating delays. I'll try my best.
And sadly, I do not own "The Office," nor any of the characters on the show or the actors who portray them.
Each chapter will be one day in a new year. I had no plans to write a long story, but this one just showed itself to me. I should also say ahead of time that I'm very busy at work, so apologies in advance for any updating delays. I'll try my best.
And sadly, I do not own "The Office," nor any of the characters on the show or the actors who portray them.
Author's Chapter Notes:
Jim and Pam aren't in this one. Well, not really. They kind of are. But kind of not. Anyway, I hope y'all like it.
Oh, and I was being gestated when this chapter takes place, so if it's not exactly spot on with the speech and references, forgive me, will ya? Enjoy!
Oh, and I was being gestated when this chapter takes place, so if it's not exactly spot on with the speech and references, forgive me, will ya? Enjoy!
Chapter End Notes:
I swear, Larissa Halpert is not a caffeine fiend or an alcoholic!
Review, review, please! A writer thrives on it.
Review, review, please! A writer thrives on it.
