He expected Pam to let Andy down easy, because she was kind and gracious. She always had been. Despite the fact that everything about Andy was nothing short of ridiculous, she would be sweet and simply but briefly say no.
Pam saw Jim perk up, surely interested in how she would turn Andy down. She was planning on making an excuse, or giving him an “I’ll think about it” so she could postpone having to make an excuse. But suddenly her mind transported her to a time a few weeks ago, on the day where she’d talked to Jim for the first time after his leaving, when he got her by mistake. He’d called her Fancy New Beesly . She went home that night, the words ringing in her ears. They were so right, so true.
Her memory took her back further in time, to a night where the air was the perfect temperature, the night was gorgeous, and they broke their friendship into pieces over the sidewalk. And then, after he had the courage to pick the pieces back up and try to show her a different way they could fit together, she’d shattered them entirely.
He put everything on the line, she thought. And he went first. So there’s no way what he did was less scary than what I need to do. He deserves to hear this, for me to break my heart for him, because it’s all I can give him to make things right again.
Now’s my chance. I won’t even have to look directly at him, and so I won’t get scared and chicken out. I can’t chicken out anymore. It’s now or never. Deep breath. Okay.
“Actually, Andy, I’m not really looking to date right now. It’s really nice of you to ask, but…I’m just not in…the right place. It’s kind of a long story. You probably don’t want to know…” Pam trailed off, praying Andy would take the bait. She watched Jim out of her peripheral vision. He was definitely listening. She quickly shook her head, as if to shake out the insecurity and second thoughts that were threatening to take her under. No, she thought. It’s time.
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© 2006-2023 More Than That | Skin created by Kali