Pam opens the door and steps in the house, not sure if she's ready for this, but so thankful to have Jim by her side, basically holding her up.

As soon as she steps into the house she is overwhelmed by sounds and smells. Penny comes up to them and says, 'People are dropping in, offering their condolences and bringing food.'

'Oh, that's nice.'

Pam and Jim go further into the house and see her mom sitting on the couch surrounded by several people.

Helene looks up at them. 'Oh, hello dears. As soon as we got home our neighbors started coming over bringing food. Why don't you go in the kitchen and help yourselves?' 

   Pam says hello to her parents neighbors then she and Jim go to the kitchen. There's numerous bowls and platters of food to eat. She notices a couple bouquets of flowers also and a couple cards.

Pam murmurs, 'That's nice that people did that.'

'Yes it is. Are you hungry?'

Pam thinks for a moment. 'Not really. I think I'll just have some tea. But, you help yourself.'

Jim takes one of the plates on the counter and helps himself to a casserole. 'You sure? You should have something to eat.'

Pam feels her stomach rolling around like she's going to be sick. 'Not now. Maybe later.'

'Ok Beesly.'

They go into the dining area and sit at the table to eat. Penny joins them a few minutes later. She's also not eating and is drinking some rum and Coke. 

She says, 'Man, this is overwhelming.'

'Yeah, it is.'

'Mom said he wasn't feeling good this morning, then passed out at work and never woke back up.'

'Oh my god.'

'Yeah.'

They all sit quietly for a moment.

Finally Penny says, 'I told mom we'd help her call people to let them know what happened. She wants us to figure out when and where to have the memorial service this evening.' 

Pam nods. 'Ok.'

Penny stares down at her drink. 'You know that these things happen. Parents are supposed to go before the kids, but I never thought it would be so soon.'

Pam pats Penny's hand. 'I know sis. It almost doesn't feel real, does it?'

Penny looks up and there are tears in her eyes. 'No. No, it does not. I keep expecting him to walk in the door any minute now.'

'Yeah.' Jim puts his hand on hers and she looks at him and smiles a little.

They continue to talk about memories of their father for awhile. Later in the evening Helene comes into the dining room and sits at the table with the other three.

She sighs heavily. 'Everyone's gone. That sure is tiring.' She turns to Pam and Penny. 'Girls, I have a list of people who need to be called and we can split it in three if you're both ok with that.'

Pam says, 'Of course mom.'

Penny nods.

Helene continues, 'And, I would like to talk to you both about the memorial.'

Pam gulps. "ok.' She knew they had to do this, but she's not ready for it. She wonders, are you ever ready for this?

They spend some time deciding on how to word his obituary, on music and pictures and a eulogy for the service. They decide on a time for the memorial (after Christmas) and decide to let others get up and say some words about Will Beesly if they want to.  

Once again Pam is so grateful to have Jim next to her, who has been holding her hand the whole time.

Later in the evening they are all yawning and Helene says they have discussed things enough and that they can talk more the next day.

Penny stays with their mom for the night and Pam and Jim get up to leave. There are hugs all around and Helene thanks Jim for coming and being there for Pam. 

When Jim drives her to her apartment, they sit in the car for awhile.

Jim asks, 'Would you like me to come up for a bit?'

'Yes please.'

'Ok.'

They go up to Pam's apartment and she gives him a quick tour. he makes a joke about the one kitchen and looks through her artwork. Pam goes to her bedroom and changes into some sweats. She comes back out and Jim hands her a cup of tea.

Pam smiles as she takes the mug. 'How did you know?'

'Because I know you Beesly.'

'Thanks.'

'Do you feel like eating now?'

'Actually I do.' She goes to the freezer and shows him miscellaneous pints of ice cream. 'You want some?'

Jim laughs and takes a pint of mint chocolate chip. Pam takes Karamel Sutra by Ben and Jerry's. They go to the couch and sit and dive into the ice cream.

They sit silently for awhile and finally Pam speaks. 'I keep thinking about the little things, you know? Like how he always called me sweetheart, how he noticed when I did something different with my hair, his voice when he sang along to his favorite songs, how proud he was when I learned to drive, stories he would come up with when putting me to bed when I was little. Not the big things.' She turns and looks at Jim. 'Why do you think that is?'

'I don't know. I haven't lost very many people in my life. My grandfather died when I was nine of cancer. I don't have very many memories of him, but he was very beloved. One of my favorite memories is of his pipe. He didn't smoke cigarettes, just the pipe. Now, when I smell that aroma, I think of him.' 

 'Huh, weird how our minds do that.'

'Yeah, maybe it's to help us to grieve.'

'Yeah, maybe.'

She sits quietly again and eats more of her ice cream. Finally she says 'Do you want to stay the night?'

Jim looks over at her, but she is staring into her ice cream. 'Sure, I can sleep on the couch for a night.'

Pam, still looking into her ice cream. 'You can stay with me, in my bed. I just mean....I don't know if I will be able to fall asleep and I think it will help having you there.'

'Oh, ok. Uh, yeah, I could do that.'

Pam stands up. 'Great. Thanks.' She walks to the kitchen and throws away their cartons of ice cream. 'I'm going to get ready for bed then. I'll let you know when it is safe to come in.' She turns around and smirks a bit at him.

Jim chuckles. 'Ok Beesly.'

Pam changes into a night shirt and shorts. She goes through her nightly rituals, then goes to the bed and pulls the covers down.

She suddenly feels very nervous. What is she doing inviting Jim into her bed? She doesn't even know which side he likes to sleep on. She opens her door and goes to tell Jim that he doesn't have to stay with her, when she hears his voice and realizes he is on the phone. 

He sounds upset. 'I don't know what you mean, she's my friend....I just want to be there for her right now and help her out with all of this...that's not true....that wasn't my intention Karen...I know...yeah, yeah, you're right....well, I am sorry if that's the way you feel....ok, ok...goodbye.'

Pam turns and quietly goes back to her bedroom.  A minute later there is a light knock on the door.

  'Beesly, you decent?'

'Yeah, come on in.'

Jim comes in and sits next to her on the bed.

They're both silent for a minute. Pam looks over at him. 'Are you ok?'

Jim looks straight ahead. 'I just broke up with Karen.'

'Oh Jim, I'm so sorry.'

'Yeah. Well, I hope you have an extra toothbrush, because I don't want your cooties.'

Pam gets up and lightly swats his arm. 'Come on Halpert. I'll show you where everything is.'

While Jim is getting ready for bed in the bathroom, Pam gets under the covers and waits for him. He comes in just in his undershirt and boxers. He turns off the overhead light since she has a lamp on next to the bed. He gets in to the other side of the bed. 

They both lay on their backs, staring at the ceiling. Pam reaches over and turns off the lamp. She can make out where he is with the outside streetlamp streaming through her windows. She then rolls over to face Jim. He turns over and faces her. He gently reaches out and strokes her cheek. Pam feels tears well up in her eyes.

He says, 'It's starting to snow.'

'I love the snow.'

'I know.'

Pam is quiet for a moment. 'I'm really sorry about Karen. Is she mad?' 

'I think she is frustrated more than anything. I guess people at the party were talking about our relationship.'

'Oh.'

'It wasn't right, the way I treated her. She was more of a friend, than a girlfriend. I think she has stronger feelings for me than I do for her. I just cannot love someone else when I'm still so in love with the receptionist.'

Pam puts her hand on his arm and rubs it up and down. 'My dad dying is making me realize things. I know my dad knew how much I loved him, but life is short. You never know when it's your time to go. It's a cliche, but it's true.  I need to let people who are important to me know how much they mean to me. Starting with you.' 

Jim runs his hand through her hair. 'Oh Pam.'

Pam stars silently crying. The tears run down her face and hit her pillowcase.

'I love you. I have always loved you and I always will. That night, things got so screwed up. I said the wrong thing and I am so sorry. I was confused, surprised and just, I guess, scared. I miss you so much. I should have called you everyday in Stamford and begged you to come home to me. You are my best friend, you are my partner in crime and you are my soulmate. I am so in love with you Jim Halpert and I am so sorry for screwing things up so badly.'

Jim's eyes are also welling up as she makes this declaration. 'Pam, I just...wow! I didn't realize you felt this way.'

Now Pam is really crying and Jim wipes the tears away with his thumbs. 'Please, don't leave me again.'

'Never. Never will I leave you again. Pamela Beesly, you are the love of my life.'

Pam tried to smile through her tears. 'Oh, thank God.'

Jim chuckles a little. 'I want to be with you and only you.'

Pam reaches over and hugs him. He hugs her back and she buries her face in his chest and continues to cry.

Jim rubs his hand up and down her back. 'Oh Beesly, It's ok. We are ok. I am sorry I've been so cold to you. I was trying to protect my heart, but you have always owned it. I just didn't realize you felt the same way.'

'I know. I wanted to tell you, but I thought I had lost you for good.'

'Never. You understand?' He pulls back a little. She lifts her head. 'I will always love you.'

'Jim... God, I love you so much.'

She leans up towards him a little and he meets her partway in a kiss. They both moan a little when their lips meet. As they continue their kiss, Pam decides to be a little bit bold and licks his bottom lip to get him to open his mouth to her. She groans when he willingly opens to her.

He pulls back and looks down at her. She lifts her hand and palms his cheek. He kisses her forehead, then the tip of her nose. 

Jim wraps his arms around her back and turns so that he's on his back and she's on top of him, laying her cheek on his chest and hearing his heartbeat.

Pam feels like she's in a warm cocoon. He rubs his hands up and down her back and kisses the top of her head. 'I love you so much Beesly.'

'Jim, please don't let me go.'

'I'm right here. I'm not going anywhere. I promise you.'

Pam feels like she has so much more to say to him, but at that moment, sleep comes to her on a cloud and the last thing she remembers thinking is 'finally.'