Performance Review

Talk to me, Tivo: Everyone is on edge during performance review day, including Michael who steals the employee suggestion box in search of new ideas he can present to his boss.
Jaminess: 2 [3=Casino Night]

Jam Cam: The only talk about sex that Jim is going to be a part of today is Dwight’s talk about his new fitness orb. Yuck. Meanwhile, the only action Pam’s hearing about is through a message Jan left for Michael. That’s probably not what she expected as part of her performance review this year. Despite that, Pam still spins it to her advantage so she doesn’t have to start her performance review on a bad note.

Jim is dealing with more of Dwight’s crap — this time, Dwight is trying to convince him to push the non-existent double tabbed file folders [do those even exist in real life?] to help him screw up his performance review. At least Dwight doesn’t have to see Jim tomorrow since today is Friday and….wait what? Jim has been given manna from Heaven! “Today is Thursday, but Dwight thinks that it’s Friday aaaaaand that’s what I’ll be working on this afternoon.” Jim, maybe you should work on trying to get the receptionist to break off her engagement to Roy. Just a suggestion.

Jim and Pam have a quick pow wow in the kitchen. Pam confirms to Jim that Michael and Jan made out…maybe more [Jim: Oh! Ick!]. Jim confirms for Pam that it is indeed Thursday, but Dwight thinks it’s Friday. The look on Pam’s face makes viewers squee with delight — and Jim as well apparently. Ah, SchemingJam. Scheming sexual tension Jam.

But how can Pam have fun on “Friday” if Michael keeps bugging her to get a list of non-existent suggestions together. At least the suggestion box itself may somehow exist somewhere. Here’s a suggestion: fire Roy and have Pam kick his non-working butt out of the house so she can get together with Jim. Again, just a suggestion.

Jim seems to be having more fun at this point, calling a friend to leave a message about getting together tomorrow, which is…”Saturday.” Jim’s fist pump in thanks to Dwight is more “Thanks for the amusement,” and less “Thanks for the help, loser who listens in on my personal calls.”

Squee! SchemingJam are going after Dwight full force, who apparently has friends to get drunk with instead of watching NBC’s Thursday line-up [which none of us miss, Dwight, what a loser.]. Pam, did you see The Apprentice last night? Yeah, it was so awesome. Pam, are you coming by my house tomorrow, which is Saturday, for dinner and a movie and maybe more? Ok, so we just wish Jim said that.

Ah, the suggestion box. What are we doing about Y2K? You have bad B.O. What’s up with Michael “boning” Jan? Oh, SchemingJam glance at each other!

Pam and Jim end the day drinking Cokes and debating whether Michael and Jan actually did the deed. How do you come back from that? Jim gives Pam a heartfelt answer that makes us all think he’s really talking about him and Pam finally crossing a line they haven’t crossed yet. Pam doesn’t pick up on that. She seems to be hung up more on Michael having sex with a human being than Jim wanting to have his own office relationship with a certain someone. Ugh! This is one of those moments where you just want to knock some sense into Pam with her Coke can. Poor Jim.

At least SchemingJam had Friday to look forward to for one last adorable look and one last adorable bow before the week was over.

The Others: With performance reviews on tap for the day, Stanley will do whatever he can with his teachings from the ghetto to get a good review, Angela just likes to be judged, and Dwight comes up with a presentation that includes the fact that he’s never missed work. Meanwhile, everyone else wants to know what’s going on with Jan and Michael — seems Jam isn’t the only unrequited love in the office. Kevin heard they made out…and had sex. Whatever really happened is beside the point because the fallout includes alot of longing looks on Michael’s part, eye rolling on Jan’s, and entertainment for everyone else in the office when they decide to duke it out within ear shot of everyone inside. Poor Jan.

What have we learned today, kids: Make sure you set the right goals for the coming year as part of your annual performance review. If Jim’s performance review was based solely on his performance in convincing Dwight it’s Friday, he should get a raise and a promotion. If his review was based on getting the woman he loves to love him back, he’d get fired immediately.

– written by Jenny


Pam: Michael and Jan definitely made out.
Jim: Oh!
Pam: Maybe more.
Jim: Ack. Oh, also it’s Thursday, but Dwight thinks it’s Friday so keep that going.
Pam: Yeah!

Pam: Hey Jim.
Jim: Hey, how’s it going?
Pam: Oh my God, did you see The Apprentice last night?
Jim: Of course, it’s on every Thursday night so how can I miss it?
Pam: Can you believe who Trump fired?
Jim: No, that was unbelievable.
Dwight: Who? Who was it? Who did he fire?
Pam: You didn’t see it?
Dwight: No. I went out and got drunk with my laser tag team last night. Crap! I never go out on a Thursday night. What the hell was I thinking?

Jim: I don’t really want to picture it, but thank you, Pam.
Pam: How do you come back from that?
Jim: You don’t, I don’t think, come all the way back, you know? Especially working together.
Pam: No, I mean, doing that with Michael. How do you come back from that, as a human being?
Jim: Oh yeah. No, I don’t think you can.

Michael: Hey, it’s 12:20. Where the hell is Dwight?
Jim: Um, no idea.
Michael: Never missed a day my ass.
[Jim bows towards Pam and she bows back]

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