Date: September 28, 2007 05:24 pm Title: Chapter 1
Oo, very well written. It took me a moment to get used to the sort of cafe you were describing, but it worked out in the end.
7 [Report This]Date: February 01, 2007 07:45 pm Title: Chapter 1
Oh so horribly awkward but still amazing. I loved the part about touching and it was like electrity. So true...
Date: February 01, 2007 03:11 pm Title: Chapter 1
Ohhh. This so captured the perfect, awful tension between them. I loved it. Really nice job! Makes me hurt for both of them.
Date: February 01, 2007 03:03 pm Title: Chapter 1
Wow, that was incredibly uncomfortable, which means you really wrote this well because you had me squirming in my chair. I felt so bad they couldn't be themselves with each other.
"It's all about the suspense, right?"
Yes. Yes, it is.
Date: February 01, 2007 12:30 pm Title: Chapter 1
He wonders if he should make up membership cards for the club.
Awesome line! Haha. This was really really good, you could just feel the awkwardness, ah!
8 [Report This]Date: February 01, 2007 12:24 pm Title: Chapter 1
So good! I kept thinking "Oh, Jim and Pam eating out." Then started to doubt myself and then I was right after all. But yeah, the surprise and suspense was great!
10 [Report This]Date: February 01, 2007 10:32 am Title: Chapter 1
"It's all about the suspense, right?"
Boy, howdy. This is lovely. Atmospheric and cute and tense. And what if Karen had just been late? But yes, he's falling, and yes, he'll fight it, and yes, it'll be OK in the end. Lovely.
9 [Report This]Date: February 01, 2007 09:35 am Title: Chapter 1
Oh OH! This is like my ultimate fanfic dream. I had this thought months ago that if Pam and Jim ever went on a date, the first one would go absolutely horribly- be completely awkward, just because it's them and they have all this just...stuff between them. This was SO good, I can't even tell you. Their voices were just spot on. I have to go back an re-read right now. Eee!
9 [Report This]Date: February 01, 2007 09:29 am Title: Chapter 1
Oh, wow, so awkward. Amazing.
Date: February 01, 2007 09:22 am Title: Chapter 1
Oooh, very nicely done. All the awkwardness and things they won't say, even though they really can now, if they wanted to -- it's so great that you included that they're still so cautious around each other (in terms of romance-y stuff) even though they don't need to be, really. You did a wonderful job with the dialogue -- Pam's voice is fabulous, and you use just enough conversation to show how little they're really talking. Love the bit about not being able to watch her eat soup -- sensual, but really subtle. Lovely job with this!
Date: February 01, 2007 09:06 am Title: Chapter 1
"It's all about the suspense, right?" Clever! Like the suspense of wondering where they're going to after this awkward lunch is over so they can proceed to tear each other's clothes off and declare their undying love? Oh wait, that's not how this ends. No, really, this is much more realistic and painfully awkward and so in character that it hurts as much as 27 seconds of silence. Nice job!
10 [Report This]Date: February 01, 2007 08:57 am Title: Chapter 1
Oh gosh, this was so wonderfully horrible and awkward and sweet and secretly sexy (that whole soup thing was kind of awesome).
And I love that we didn't know what the situation was until halfway through, and then everything just started clicking. Jim's resistance was perfect, and Pam's being generally more staightforward was so subtle and fantastic.
And "It's all about the suspense, right?" was pretty much perfect :)
Date: February 01, 2007 08:56 am Title: Chapter 1
Honestly, it just gets better with repeated readings. Oh, YOU.
The check comes, and he should be glad, because it's finally over.
How do you say so much with one little "should"? The little should that could. (Yeah, I'm excusing myself now...)
10 [Report This]Date: February 01, 2007 08:43 am Title: Chapter 1
Oh DAMN YOU. I thought there would be an explosion of "DO ME AGAINST MY CAR" Smut at the end and...NOTHING.
AND YOU KNOW WHAT? It's BETTER BECAUSE OF THAT VERY FACT.
DAMN.
Okay, this review is filled with explentatives and capital letters. I promise to leave a better one ASAP.