Date: February 06, 2007 06:33 am Title: Chapter 1
By the time the moon comes out, their fingers are intertwined and he's hers. What a lovely ending. Nice piece!
Date: February 05, 2007 09:04 pm Title: Chapter 1
Really lovely and such evocative, efficient use of language. Love how each part ends in a simple sentence that distills the mood or what just happened. She's losing her chances. What a heartbreaking line.
10 [Report This]Date: February 05, 2007 07:53 pm Title: Chapter 1
"...he's there with his coat and scarf and he has this orange shadow playing across his face from the sun." - Wow, that painted a beautiful picture to set the scene. Great job on this!
10 [Report This]Date: February 05, 2007 04:37 pm Title: Chapter 1
This is just gorgeous. When you said Pam was stealing from Karen, I thought you actually meant stealing (which could have been interesting), as in stealing objects of Karen's. But this... this is much, much better. You use such evocative descriptions, like the sun through the blinds onto Jim's head, and the orange shadow, and the elevator being a candlelit moment, and the way you describe them barely, barely touching in the first one... guh. Beautiful. You've done such a remarkable job on this, creating whole scenes and emotions and everything with just a few words... it's great. Thank you for this.
Date: February 05, 2007 02:47 pm Title: Chapter 1
This was lovely. The last line totally made me squee!
Date: February 05, 2007 02:11 pm Title: Chapter 1
I love all those little moments between them. You wrote the electricity and tension between them so well! :)
Date: February 05, 2007 12:46 pm Title: Chapter 1
awww.
karens days are so numbered