Date: March 15, 2007 05:19 am Title: The Sketch
I really love that last paragraph. How great! I am really looking forward to the next chapter. I'm enjoying this story--especially this turn for the good. All the angst of Cocktails has finally faded and now they can embrace being together. Thank God.
Good job! Can't wait for the rest
Author's Response: I know, I never thought I would say it, but I'm burning out a little with all the angst. I think it brings the show down a little. But I'm enjoying the little happy places we make on this site! Thanks for reading! I'm really happy you enjoyed it.
Date: March 14, 2007 11:19 pm Title: Dwight K Schrute to the Rescue?
Ahh! I love this so far! "Did he strike you?" Hee! You write Pam/ Dwight really well. I hope you plan on doing more!
Author's Response: I love Dwight, try as I may I can't keep him out of the story. Thanks so much for the review!
Date: March 14, 2007 10:50 pm Title: The Sketch
*falls off chair*
no!! cliffhanger!!!!
GAH!!!
thx.
cheers.
--Lex
Author's Response: I realize now that wasn't nice of me! (grinning mischievously) I'm almost done with the rest.
9 [Report This]Date: March 14, 2007 09:44 pm Title: The Sketch
What? Seriously? OMG. You CANNOT end it there. It's so...guh.
Author's Response: Sorry, That wasn't nice was it! At least there is more to the story, and i'll post it quick as I can. Even I want to know what happens once he gets there.....how big is that desk anyway........?
Date: March 14, 2007 09:42 pm Title: The Last Long Conversation
Okay, by far, this is the best "Jim ends things with Karen" conversation I've seen. Because, DAMN. You've hit the nail on the head, and it's great that it's coming out of Karen's mouth. I love this part: And you need to stop moping around like you’re a victim, poor Jim – Pam broke his heart, because you’ve done this to yourself. Because Jim is totally NOT the victim here (well, at least not totally). He was in love with a woman who was engaged before she met him. Sorry if she's not going to drop the whole thing just because he asked. What I'm trying to say is thank you. cheers. --Lex
Author's Response:
This is my issue, I'm a little bit mad at our handsome Jim Halpert.....so I let it fly here, and frankly I don't know why Karen isn't saying some of these things to him....Thank you so much and I'm really happy you liked it!
Date: March 14, 2007 09:18 pm Title: The Last Long Conversation
Karen= awesome. Seriously, if/when the shit hits the fan on the show, I can totally imagine her saying something like this to Jim- brutally honest and totally true. Great job.
Author's Response: Thank you so much for the review, seriously reviews are like Pam's jelly beans (or something). I really am glad that you like the conversation. I'll admit, I let Karen say some of the things I've been wanting to say to Jim - but he doesn't seem to hear me when I scream at the TV......hmmmm.......
Date: March 14, 2007 09:14 pm Title: Jim Should Have Kept His Mouth Shut
"In an instant, Kevin and Toby came out of no where to close ranks between Roy and Pam. “I think you should, um, leave, um before, you know, I have to write you up.” Toby got out shakily, while Kevin clumsily held up his fists to protect Pam."
Aww...I love this. It shows how, despite everyone but Michael's protests to the contrary, the office people really are a bit like a family.
Author's Response: Yep, that's how I saw it. I think they do really care about each other.... in the end.
Date: March 14, 2007 09:06 pm Title: The Sketch
Oh... so nice! The sketch is sweet. I'm still reading...
Author's Response: Thanks Kev! Just checking on you..... ;-) (alright I admit, my insecurities got the better of me there.)
10 [Report This]Date: March 14, 2007 09:05 pm Title: The Sketch
B...E....A....uetiful!!!!!
Author's Response:
Thank you so much! I'm so happy you liked it. For once I was really happy with how a chapter came out, but i'm still floored if other people like it. I'm grinning at my computer this goofy grin. It means alot to me that you recc'd it at TWoP! and love your name!
Date: March 14, 2007 03:27 am Title: The Last Long Conversation
Aren't you just the sweetest ever. Seriously.
OK - totally not fair to leave it there. I mean really.
I guess I should stop complaining though - since I actually know what's next. :)
Date: March 13, 2007 09:05 pm Title: The Last Long Conversation
Wow. This is good. I'm so glad Karen and Jim are done! (If only they could be on the show, right?) You've rounded out Karen well here.
One picky comment - "shuttering" should "shuddering".
My favorite line is "His stupid unruly hair and boyish charm had blinded her to the fact that he was quite literally damaged goods"! Love it. Those are damaged goods that she did NOT want to send back until she was forced to! She was hanging on for dear life for quite some time!
Looking forward to more.
Hey, is there a meaning to your name that I'm missing? (Mine is from Hot Girl, Season 1.)
Author's Response:
Thanks, I had to suppress my Karen gag reflex, but I wanted her to be as real as possible. Thanks for the help on the spelling, I knew when I posted it that somewhere there would be an annoying mistake - in fact I told my husband so (ooh remind me to say I told you so).
My name represents that I lack creativity in the area of picking usernames. I went to UNC for college and now that I live in Kentucky I take every opportunity to remind the UK fans that I am a UNC fan - big difference. I wish I had come up with a clever Office name......maybe in my next life. Love yours though.
Date: March 09, 2007 06:46 am Title: Jim Should Have Kept His Mouth Shut
oooh this was a good chapter, i want more! i want to have that final talk :)
Author's Response: Thanks so much for saying that, as I seem to saying alot this story is being stubborn, but I am enjoying it - glad you are too! I just posted the final talk! Wish that we could see this happen on the show soon, I'm tired of whatever it is that Jim is doing with Karen.
Date: March 07, 2007 10:43 pm Title: Jim Should Have Kept His Mouth Shut
Oh, man, I am digging this. Realistic, good pacing, a bunch of good laughs. Keep it up!
Author's Response: Thank you so much. I feel like it is hard to write anything funny, and it is hard to tell if it is just my whacky sense of humor or if it is funny to others. so I'm really glad that you liked it!
Date: March 07, 2007 07:37 am Title: Jim Should Have Kept His Mouth Shut
Sticking with you? Please. This is a great story! I can't wait to read more.
Stanley just sitting there unmoved, Angela with the pitcher of water, Kelly keeping Ryan out of the fight, Michael hiding under his desk, Dwight proudly using his deputy moves when he escorts Roy out -- its the great use of the ensemble in your fic that makes me like it so much. Plus, I just love Creed's little statements - always getting everyone's names wrong. Cracks me up amidst all the tension. Nicely done.
Author's Response:
I think that, especially lately, with all the JAM frustration, the ensemble is what gets me through. Dwight holding Pam while she cried, Michael buying her art. Maybe I'm just a sucker, but I loved seeing that despite it all these people care about each other. Oddly, something I think Jim and Karen are the only ones who don't get that. Oh, and Stanley of course. ;-)
Thanks for the review, this has been a fun one for me too. And I'm so happy and flattered knowing people like reading it. Makes me feel better about the dance of joy I do when some of my favorite stories have been updated.
Date: March 07, 2007 03:52 am Title: Jim Should Have Kept His Mouth Shut
Ooo! You surprised me!! Nice job with the ending. Oh Michael.
And yay for Jim talking to Karen...one last time. :)
Author's Response: Yeah, with Michael hiding under his desk, I really couldn't resist. Yipee, for more Hourglass, that story is really touching. You've done a lovely lovely job with that.
Date: March 06, 2007 11:04 pm Title: Jim Should Have Kept His Mouth Shut
Oh, your end notes KILL me! One last time, eh? Woo hoo!!!
So, your use of Creed was fantastic. As was Toby. Just awesome. You have me on pins and needles, as usual. You just plain rock.
(p.s. I've sent my rough draft of ch3 of Truth & Consequences to my betas, so... watch for it :))
Author's Response:
Awwww, shucks. Thanks actually I really needed that this morning. Is it Friday yet?
I couldn't resist trying to write how the other office mates would react to the fight. I loved how Kevin had his fists up to Roy in the actual episode, so.... I couldn't resist having him and Toby defend Pam. And really, I just love Toby, period. Same for Creed, everytime he's in an episode, I usually laugh until I can't breathe.
Can't wait for the next chapter! I'll be obsessively checking this site for it. :-)
Date: March 06, 2007 08:31 pm Title: Jim Should Have Kept His Mouth Shut
Yay! "One last conversation" with Karen. I like how both Pam and Jim are thinking about communicating with each other at the end, even though they are separated at that point. I really like how Pam managed to get everyone some non-Michael time at the end as well.
A few details and/or constructive criticisms:
Roy's sentence about the "audience" sounds a little too sophisticated for Roy; I could see more like a "I don't want the guys to see this" type of sentence. The other Roy sentences seem spot-on to me.
I think you mean Jim wants to pummel Roy, not pommel him (pommel is the pommel horse in gymnastics). Also, probably deviant, not deviate. Yeah, you're right, I have no life.
I really liked how the office had the "collective sigh of relief". That is exactly what would happen when a big scary situation was over.
Karen putting his arm around Jim's waist and loudly saying she'd take him home was perfectly in character, I think, with what we're seeing of Karen. It fits in very well with the proprietary from-behind hug from Ben Franklin, the "hey Pam, hands off my guy" conversation of Ben Franklin (just a kiss). Karen is really trying to hang onto that man.
Nice job. I'm looking forward to more chapters - when you can.
Author's Response:
Thank you for the big review with comments. I really do want to learn to improve my writing, and it helps to hear what works for readers and what doesn't. I had a hard time with Roy, and actually this is an edited version of him, but I completely see where you are coming from. I don't watch him as closely as other characters, so I don't have a great feel for him. And, I often forget to keep him in character while trying to use him as a vehicle to motivate Jim.
I actually was an English major so the typos are appreciated. (so no comments about your life forthcoming) I went back and hopefully fixed those. I hate when a typo takes you out of the story so normally I obsessively read for the grammar and the spelling, but you know how it goes. Thanks for keeping me honest.
Yeah, Karen, poor Karen. Doomed to be hated I suppose. But I do think given the deleted scene where she thinks about ripping down the art show flyer, she would play this up to Pam. Also, it struck me as good irony for the "Let's get you in hot tub." comment from Basketball.
I really appreciate you taking the time to review! Whenever I post a chapter I think "Phew. Oh wait, let's get started again." :-)
Date: March 04, 2007 04:06 pm Title: Dwight, What is Going On?
you leave me hanging like this? how rude. it is sunday night and i may not get to read fic again until friday and this is where you leave me hanging. not cool~
Author's Response: My sincere apologies. I couldn't help it! I loved the last line and thought it had more weight if it was the end of the chapter. But I promise I'll fix it later on..... :-)
Date: March 03, 2007 05:51 am Title: Dwight, What is Going On?
I'm new to this board and office fanfic in general...but now with all that time between now and a new ep, I'm loving your take on how things will turn out. I can't wait for more!
PS Since I don't know the board very well...are there ways to get a note or message or something when a fic is updated? If so sign me up!
Author's Response:
Hello and welcome! I'm pretty new to all this as well and thank you so much for your sweet words. Yeah I wish these two would just give themselves a happy ending huh?
You can add a story to favorites and then go to "Edit preferences" under your account. Then click contact when favorites are updates, or something like that :-)
Date: March 02, 2007 04:30 pm Title: Dwight, What is Going On?
"Yeah,I'm thinking I won't do that."
Love that line, go tough Jim! Update soon:)
Author's Response: Somehow I missed you and pixie - yeah tough Jim is a good thing right? Maybe he'll make an appearance before the end of the season? Hmmmm, probably not, but I'll take sweet Jim with Pam as a substitute! Happily.
Date: March 02, 2007 04:05 pm Title: Dwight, What is Going On?
AHHHHH!!!! Damn you, evil cliffhanger. I love this so much and jim's last line made me smile.
Author's Response: Sorry noticed I missed a response here. Yeah sorry bout that cliffhanger, but don't you wish we could get an ending of an episode with Jim saying something like that. Oh, I can just here it....sigh. Thanks for reading, seriously you people make me happy.
Date: March 02, 2007 01:25 pm Title: Dwight, What is Going On?
Am I still with you? I am SO with you!!!!!!!!!
I can barely type, I'm so excited! Not only did you create hilarious Dwight dialogue
(Um, “if my calculations are correct - and they are – I assure you - , Pam shouldn’t be experiencing these symptoms for another 13 days.” "My source, who shall remain nameless" AMAZING)
But you also create a wonderfully conflicted, honest Pam moment and end with an incredibly cliffhanger! I mean, Jim's last line? I'm so in love with that fictional man, it's scary.
Author's Response: Thank you Thank you! I'm so happy you like it! By the way, when do I get to see more "Truth and Consequences"? Hmmmmm?
Date: March 02, 2007 09:45 am Title: Dwight, What is Going On?
"Yeah I'm thinking I won't do that." Gave me chills. You write Jim very well!!
Author's Response:
I know, why can't we see that on the show huh? Thanks for your kind words, I really appreciate it. Sitting at work trying to look busy and your words made me smile.
Date: March 02, 2007 08:34 am Title: Dwight, What is Going On?
Absolutely I'm still with you. Keep going!!!!
Author's Response: Thanks so much! I love reviews, they totally light up my day. The writing is getting me through the 6 weeks, and I'm so glad you like it.
Date: March 02, 2007 08:24 am Title: Dwight, What is Going On?
Hell yeah, I'm still with you. Bring it... soon, please!!
Author's Response: THANKS! Just checking.....I'm working on it. :-)
Author's Response: Oh and PS, saw in your bio that you're from Kentucky, me too! small world. Now if we could just get some sun in this state.