Date: February 12, 2009 10:28 pm Title: Definition
I cannot ever praise you enough. You write the two of them so perfectly and so beautifully. The pacing of this is wonderful. Sweetly and achingly slow and delicate. And the atmosphere you've created in this simple scene is amazing. I love everything about this basically and will probably read this over and over.
Author's Response: Unfold, you're so kind. Repeat reads flatter me. I'm glad you enjoyed it. As I said to another member of this community, I'm looking forward to getting enough distance from this one so I can read it myself. Thank you again for all of the generous feedback on this one.
Date: February 12, 2009 10:02 pm Title: Definition
"What do you want to do today?" she asks.
"Ten down," he grins at her.
I can hear him saying that. Oh my God. I love him. I want a Jim Halpert of my very own.
This was lovely. Very sad and sweet all at once. I love that Jim isn't a sexGOD! their first time, because it seems more realistic to me. He's worshipped this girl for years, he's not going to be a stallion on the first go-round.
Basically, I love it. Bravo.
Author's Response: I want to start a new trend - "ten down" as a euphemism for sex. LET'S MAKE IT HAPPEN, PEOPLE! :) Thanks so much for your kind review, Lenore. My betas and I discussed Jim Halpert, Boy Sex God at some length (twss) as I was writing this. The general consensus was, to be brief, yuck. Clumsy, sweet, and focused is a million times hotter than overconfidence, don't you think? Cheers.
10 [Report This]Date: February 12, 2009 08:51 pm Title: Definition
OMG seriously have fallen in love with you and this little mini series. You've written Jim and Pam PERFECTLY. Saving to favorites immediately. I'm sad it's over :(
Author's Response: Thanks, Hannah. I'm glad you liked it. I've got another one in the works. Hope to be sharing it with all of you sooner rather than later.
10 [Report This]Date: February 12, 2009 07:50 pm Title: Definition
You killed me. I'm dead, in case you were wondering.
With so many first time fics, people like to write that Jim and Pam are randomly so comfortable with each other, or one is so bold all of a sudden, and it never quite feels right. What you've written it just so human- his hands shaking, her hands balled into fists. Its beautiful in it's awkwardness, because no matter who the person is, its going to be weird.
I'm running out of wonderful things to say. But seriously, you just always have your own approach to things that is so strikingly honest. And I really appreciate. I'm always holding my breath.
I wish I had coherent, constructive things to say. But you're already doing everything right =)
Author's Response: I have to stop writing fic or you people need to take care better care of yourselves. I'm much too cute to go to prison. :) I've read a lot of first date/time fics, and, as I wrote it here, it seems likely to me that, if either of them is going to be bold, it's going to be Jim. At the same time, our dear boy is kind of a basketcase, so there's no way he's really going to be completely calm and collected in this situation, especially if Pam isn't holding it together. I think FNB wasn't really all that F or N; I think she was just talking past a lot of her own anxieties. That approach is probably going to work in most situations, but I just can't see her not getting a little worked up over being physical with Jim, esp. if she thinks that they're rushing things. As always, thanks so much for taking the time to leave such a kind review. I don't think it'll be too long before you people get another one out of me. Hope you like it.
10 [Report This]Date: February 12, 2009 07:33 pm Title: Definition
Talkative.
Talkative, Talkative, Talkative.
Of all the authors in this fandom that I've read, you have, it seems, a better understanding of Jim and Pam, both as individuals and as a couple, than most authors do. They're pretty well-rounded in the canon of the series, but you have an extraordinary talent for truly fleshing them out and giving them so much more dimension.
Why yes, I do fangirl you.
Love this fic to pieces.
Author's Response: Wot? :-D A fangirl? I have a fangirl?! That's kind of awesome, actually. From my perspective, the challenge of characterization is the whole reason to write fic, and I'm tickled that you think I'm successful. Thank you so much for your generous review. I sincerely appreciate it.
10 [Report This]Date: February 12, 2009 07:22 pm Title: Pronunciation
Guh I love it and I love you. The end.
Author's Response: Again, I'm flattered. Thanks a lot.
10 [Report This]Date: February 12, 2009 06:11 pm Title: Etymology
That was amazing. I LOVE the way you have written Pam, it's nice to see a different side to her. YAY continue :)
Author's Response: Thanks, Hannah. I'm all done with this one now, but I'm glad you enjoyed it.
Date: February 12, 2009 05:27 pm Title: Definition
Sweet jeebus, you want to to play nice when you just killed me dead?
So much to love about this entire story, not just this chapter. But jeez, you make inelegant and slightly embarrassing and awkward both hot as hell and even a bit sentimental. (We old married ladies have had our last first times with someone, god willing, so the 'first time' with Pam & Jim is something to cherish.)
I love how these two connected -- still in that awkward 'how do we have this sort of conversation' stage, but knowing that vulnerability is the way to true intimacy. The way they admit to the fantasies about each other is both believeable and a conversation I would love to have heard (thank God for fanfic yet again!).
Next prickly topic -- the exes. Very mature of them to deal with the elephant in the room, but believably so. I can see where they'd want to make sure no shadows of the past messed up what they've both wanted for so long. Guh. I am just so in love with how in love with each other they are.
...aaaand now it's only 1/2 hour to showtime! Woo! Talkative, you rock out loud. Thanks for sharing this with us.
Author's Response: I want the mods not to hate me for being a smut-peddler and I'm trying to make the lot of you complicit in that plan. So far, it seems to be working, bless your little black hearts. :) I'm an old married lady myself, so I know what you're saying wrt 'first times,' in that I never want to have another one, but, boy, they're kind of fun. As I was writing this one, "Stress Relief" aired, and Pam, another heart that needs blessing, elbowed Jim and murmured "You're good to talk to," in a way that suggested a particular context for the "conversation" she was thinking of. I felt like that one little line affirmed my entire plan of attack here. Thank you, thank you so much for the wonderful reviews that you always write, lisa. See you on the boards.
10 [Report This]Date: February 12, 2009 05:19 pm Title: Definition
I absolutely adore you!
This story was amazing. I don't think I'll ever get tired of "first date fic", but this has to be one of the best I've ever read. You really got the mood right, the characters were spot on, and I think "He's kissing her like he's got to take extra, save some for later, and stop doing it immediately" is one of the best lines ever.
Thanks for this; it was a very enjoyable read.
Author's Response: Hey pigeon - It is amazing to me how many times we can, individually and collectively, keep going back to the 'first date' well and keep finding interesting, new, and meaningful things there. I never get tired of it, either. I'm flattered that you think it was one of the best you've read (my personal favorite and the place I got my name? Talk, by Annabel Winslow). Thanks for taking the time to read and leave such kind words for me.
Date: February 12, 2009 05:03 pm Title: Etymology
I love this. Truly beautiful, the lazy kind of way they talk while undressing each other. so realisitic and beautiful, and dare i say, hot, without being contrite and dirty and too explicit. guh. you have no idea how excited i was to see this updated.
but, i'm having a brain fart, and i'm tired and i'm not that smart enough to figure out that crossword that pam was working on. can you give a girl another hint?
Author's Response: Hey, Miss - thank you. My aim here was to write what I jokingly called "zen smut" in my emails to my betas - smut without smut; all cake, no frosting. I didn't want explicit and I didn't want it to seem, as Colette so fantastically put it in one of her messages to me, as if someone had abruptly hit the smut button and it was time to abandon the plot and get down to it. ;) Finally, your hint - eleven letters, horizontal conversation, first letter is 'i.' Another hint - on the inside, I'm kind of a nine-year-old boy. That should help.
10 [Report This]Date: February 12, 2009 04:57 pm Title: Definition
Breathes out heavily. Wow. That was just perfect. I love the tentative beginning of the scene and the building confidence on both of their parts. Too much good stuff to quote. One though, stood out for me:
The first time I can remember choosing to think about you? I just hated myself after.
I guess it's the way you have Jim exposing himself. So vulnerable. And then you have Pam make it all right by admitting she fantasized the same way. This is ... well I'm out of words.
Author's Response: Thanks, Vamp. I wanted to experiment with the vulnerability and the awkwardness of them, so I'm glad you enjoyed it. Cheers.
Date: February 12, 2009 04:51 pm Title: Definition
Damn you! You know I don't get much done around here when you're writing fic. This chapter was incredible. I love you and your Betas! Keep up the fantabulous work.
Author's Response: I'm sorry, iwant... shall I write a note for your boss? :) Thanks so much for your kind words, dear. I'm glad you liked it.
Date: February 12, 2009 04:40 pm Title: Definition
Wow. Talkative, just...wow. I love this, it's brilliant! I don't know how you captured such a perfect mixture of uncertainty and teasing and determination to just go through with it dammit no matter the nervousness--but it's fantastic. I love the whole section where they do their awkward revelations of Jim's eight and Pam knowing full well it was five times, but not wanting to admit she knew exactly--awesome. Very believable. I could do a cut-and-paste of the whole thing to highlight my favorite parts but that would be much too long, so I'll leave you with this one:
He smells like sweat and sex and Tuesday afternoon meetings and she still can't quite process that she's not making this up, even as it's unraveling her, as she's saying his name and he's holding her tight.
I think that sums it up nicely.
Brilliant job, as always!
Author's Response: Hey callisto - I can't reveal all of my secrets, but I will say this - I've been writing this *#^& thing since the middle of December, so I've had plenty of time to think about what I wanted to do with them given the "rules" I established here. :) Wrt the cut and paste problem, I felt the same way about your latest, so I understand completely. Thanks, as always, for your kind words, and for sharing your work with us (p.s. - we are totally going to get that idea you've got written - no two ways about it!).
Date: February 12, 2009 01:52 pm Title: Pronunciation
I love this piece. I think it's very realistic.
Author's Response: Thank you, Pisa. Realism was important to me in writing this. I appreciate it.
Date: February 07, 2009 11:23 pm Title: Pronunciation
This is definitely awesome. Keep it up. :D
Author's Response: Thanks, I_am_Pam. I appreciate it.
Date: February 04, 2009 11:53 pm Title: Pronunciation
::sigh:: this is so delicious. Just this slow burn that's happening and the sweetness of this nap. The "deconstruction" of his scent...lordy...
You do have a way with words. I can not wait for the next installment!
Author's Response: Thank you so much, LoveFool. I'm definitely aiming for sighs here. This is such a lovely place to give my inner romantic free reign. The final chapter should be up before the middle of next week. I hope you enjoy it.
Date: February 04, 2009 10:36 pm Title: Pronunciation
Okay, this is incredibly sexy. Please update this soon, you are too good.
Author's Response: Thank you, yanna. I hope to post the concluding chapter early next week.
Date: February 04, 2009 09:42 pm Title: Pronunciation
Just realized I accidentally posted my review under the wrong chapter, so I'm moving it over here:
Ah, I miss spring, summer, warm weather. Something about the open windows, eating on the hood of the car in the sun, it just adds a sense of calm to things. I love this story. I love that Jim takes care of Pam like we all know he did... the little touches are perfect.
I'm already lamenting the end of this.
Author's Response: Kate, I live in a part of the U.S. that is cold, gray, and miserable for about four months out of the year. Since we're now in about month three of those four months, I'm beginning to long for sunshine and open windows, too. I think writing those details in was wish-fulfillment on my part. :) I'm glad you're enjoying this. Thanks for taking the time to read and review.
Date: February 04, 2009 08:06 pm Title: Pronunciation
I consider myself very lucky to be getting to read these chapters ahead of time. Thus, you already know what I liked about this (as a refresher, to sum up: everything). I feel like I'm constantly lavishing you with praise, my dear. But don't let it go to your head. I have a cattle prod and I'm not afraid to use it when it comes to the final chapter of this. Not with so many skeevy fantasies hanging in the balance.
Author's Response: Poor Ms. Blanca has to listen to Talkative do what she does best. Thanks so much for being a willing editor and a wonderful sounding board. You might not need that cattle prod - I'm getting more and more comfortable with the final chapter. Perhaps you can downgrade to a sharp stick or a trail of M&Ms leading to the "post" button or something? Think on it. I'll be in touch soon.
10 [Report This]Date: February 04, 2009 05:02 pm Title: Pronunciation
I love the slow pace and details of this story! I couldn't list my favorite passages because I'd just be cutting & pasting the whole chap!
Author's Response: Thanks for your kindness, Vamp. I'm glad to see that you're updating Cardiac Care again. Best of luck finishing up.
Date: February 04, 2009 01:55 pm Title: Pronunciation
I love the detail you are painting of Pam's rather shaky confidence. She's learned to say what's on her mind, but that doesn't make it easy.
And I don't think they could stop loving each other if they tried. And they did try. Or at least lied to themselves that they could stop. Guh.
Bring on Thursday!!
Author's Response: Hello Ms. Hoo - Thursday was pretty awesome, just like this review. I'm trying to find that place that Pam was in at the end of S3, where she has to make an effort to really put herself out there, but it's an effort that she's becoming capable of making. It's a lot of fun to write. Thanks so much for your kind words.
Date: February 04, 2009 01:17 pm Title: Pronunciation
:thud:
I cannot get over how much I'm in love with this story. You've captured our little couple so perfectly and I just can't get enough of their adorable awkwardness. I think you've made Pam's reaction to all of this sudden relationship stuff very realistic and believable, which I really appreciate. All in all I'm basically completely in awe of your abilities and CANNOT wait for more! :)
Author's Response: :: smelling salts ::rnrnThank you, nandance. I'm glad you're enjoying it and believing the choices I'm making with the characters. Hope you enjoy the last part.
Date: February 04, 2009 12:41 pm Title: Pronunciation
awww, this was cute (:
Author's Response: Thank you! Glad you liked it. :)
10 [Report This]Date: February 04, 2009 11:33 am Title: Pronunciation
Talkative what a wonderful story you're writing. I'm so enjoying this slow process of Jim and Pam post The Job. I love the idea that it might be hard and awkward for them at first while still be amazing (obviously). It's written so well, and I'm so disappointed every time I get to the end of the chapter, which is of course meant to me a compliment. ;-) Keep up the amazing work and thanks for posting!
Author's Response: Hiya, Stablegirl - thanks so much for taking the time to write. I think that these two have caused each other too much misery and have too much of a history for this to be entirely uncomplicated. At the same time, the idea of too much drama just seems out of character to me. It's a fun balance to locate. I'm glad you're enjoying it.
Date: February 04, 2009 10:43 am Title: Pronunciation
I'll be a little more brief this time.
I just love the way you capture the ease of these two being together. Though it's not really ease at all because they're both still nervous and unsure about things and yet even that seems easy.
Also, that line about her recategorizing all his eye rolls once she realizes what they actually mean? Wonderful.
And the ending is perfection. Just- alkjsf. Perfection.
Author's Response: Hi, unfold - thank you again for being so generous with your thoughts last time and thank you for this. I feel like I keep getting little hints from every new episode that airs that affirms the choices I'm making here. Last night, Pam told us that she had been feeling guilty about her part in the way Jim and Karen's relationship ended, which is something I've been touching on a bit here. I may have to turn it up a bit in the last part, if only because I have some sort of confirmation of the guess I've been making. Again, thanks so much. I hope you enjoy the last part.