Date: December 30, 2020 06:41 pm Title: Chapter 7
Ooooof. This is brutal. They’ve fallen for each other and are totally trapped. It’s lovely to see them being honest with each other, but they’re in a situation well beyond the power of honesty or bravery to resolve. And yet they’re reaching out for each other anyways. This was just really nicely developed and came together well.
So. If I’ve got my facts straight here, it seems an awful lot like Pam might’ve been the last person to see Packer alive. While having a loud argument with him in which he used physical force on her. I was thinking last chapter that in another world you could see Pam as a femme fatale in this story, ensnaring Jim in a murder investigation when Roy turns up dead. Now I’m actually pretty worried at an increasingly plausible scenario in which *Pam* is falsely accused of murder.
Date: December 29, 2020 04:18 am Title: Chapter 7
This is an epic romance and I am here for it. This, holy god, BT, this is one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever read:
“They relished in that moment for a precious few seconds, their mutual acknowledgement of how they felt about the other blanketing them in the warmth and security that new love can bring despite how uncertain it so often is.”
“They couldn’t.” OOF.
“she kissed him first” Yes, get it girl.
Nothing ends a very good first make out session quite like a bloated corpse...
So here’s the thing. I’m very mad at myself that it took me so long to catch up with this story, but I’m also going to need you to update it like yesterday. Please and thank you.
Date: December 29, 2020 04:05 am Title: Chapter 6
BT, I am honestly in awe of the backstory that you‘be built for all the characters that somehow fits into this universe, but also keeps so true to their original characterizations.
I mean: “I told them I was good at bookkeeping but I made some mistakes”
And this is like exhibit 30. Awe I tell you. Straight up awe.
“Jim’s brain felt like someone had taken a puzzle and emptied the box inside, and now he had to pick through the pieces and make sure they were turned picture-side up and separate the edges from the interior.” Perfect analogy is perfect.
“my mung beans” Okay, like I said above. Awe.
“It was a color somewhere between blue and violet” Oh. So it’s going to be like that, huh...
Stop. How are you giving me the one bed in a hotel room trope?! I can’t even begin to bear it.
1 [Report This]Date: December 29, 2020 03:46 am Title: Chapter 5
“I don’t know how they plan their parties down here.” This made me smile. It’s such a sweet nod to the PPC.
You know, I’m so wrapped up in this story that I totally forgot someone is going to get murdered at some point. The intrigue of everyone’s dealings with Packer and why he’s invited them there in the first place is already so intriguing.
“a windmill of gangly limbs” Well, this a delightful image.
“He could have sworn he felt his heart explode before stitching itself back into the shape of her.” I’m sorry, but what the actual fuck, BT?! This is PERFECTION.
“Jim didn’t know it yet, but the next time he saw Packer it would be too late.” Ooooh, more intrigue...
1 [Report This]Date: December 29, 2020 03:31 am Title: Chapter 4
Holy unresolved sexual tension. BT, I am dying. The way you write their chemistry is so damn good. Jim all soggy & very Mr Darcy & Pam checking him out? The way I’m DEAD.
“I wish that you really could.” Ahhh.
I’m past coherent words. It’s just my jaw dropping open in awe of how good you are at the writing from here on out...
“She rolled her eyes with textbook technique.” This is such a perfect Kelly introduction. I adore her.
“what has two thumbs” Oh. So Packer is still going to be Packer, huh. Thanks, I hate him. (And you’ve totally nailed him and I am very impressed).
“Jim..othy?” Michael. Oh Michael. How is he so ridiculous and so endearing all at once.
“Sometimes I just don’t get Roy.” BT. Girl. I wasn’t expecting this seamless intertwining of canon & I am destroyed. It’s so, so good.
“so scared to break the threads that wove this moment together because he knew that there’d be no stitching them back one they were severed.” I’m done. This is too beautiful. I’m out of words. I just —
“not a bad day” HOW DARE YOU
Date: December 28, 2020 05:07 pm Title: Chapter 7
I can't wait for the next chapter, so exciting!
Date: December 28, 2020 08:59 am Title: Chapter 7
And it begins.
Yeah, I'm with Dernhelm. Not saying it's definitely Toby but I wouldn't be surprised in the slightest. But I have another theory: *Michael*. I mean, he's financially dependant on him but they are shown to be the best of friends. Though I suspect there's something more to their personal relationship (and I'm curious if it involves Holly). I wouldn't think Michael would kill anyone else, mind you, he seems to be a standup guy. Packer, though? Nah, he'd kill the bastard.
Also, thank the GOD Lord the man's a corpse now. I mean, Packer was always an a-hole, but add the opportunistic business mogul layer on top of that and you have a truly despicable character. The fact that he was the one who hurt Pam was something I admittedly didn't see coming, and I'm curious where Roy was during all this. (Did he *allow* Packer to do this to her?) I personally think Jim's response is rather harsh, but it makes sense: he's hurt, he's confused, he has a million running thoughts, and the last thing he needs is to be strung along, especially considering the story he wants to cover that'll no doubt advance his career. Pam opening up about her reasoning and being brave enough to establish their love with the kiss was extremely satisfying; it gives her a moment of courage, something I'm sure she'll demonstrate more of. Her backstory is insanely upsetting, and I hope that there's at least some form of compensation for her when this is all over so her and Jim can have a modest living arrangement but still be in love.
A succinct chapter that's getting me intrigued. Well done!
1 [Report This]Date: December 27, 2020 05:03 pm Title: Chapter 3
Hi, hello, thank you kindly for the detailed imagery of Savannah Jim’s night clothes (or lack there of). Bless.
“his heart threatened to permanently take up residence in his throat.” So beautiful.
The chemistry. Oh good god, the chemistry.
“His heart had pieced itself back together, gone from butterflies to a ball of lead that was falling, falling, falling.” Ugh. Could that picture of Roy... not...
No, no, no. “I can’t say no.”
“How much more feeling could he develop for her over the course of a week?” Umm. I have my fingers crossed for a lot of feeling.
Pam is already pranking Dwight? It’s fine. I’m fine. I’m just a little in love with both Savannah Pam and Savannah Jim.
1 [Report This]Date: December 27, 2020 03:53 pm Title: Chapter 7
For a comparatively shorter chapter, this packs all sorts of punch. Jim's anger feels very real. Not only to the situation, but to his character. Something happens and he stews on it, over analyzes it, and comes up with a seeming logical but wrong conclusion. Which of course leads him to blowing up at Pam. Now it also feels like there's a shred of truth to his frustration, but the reality of Pam's plight quickly erases what's going on.
I love that Pam doesn't run away in the face of Jim's anger. She's very quickly gained the courage to open up to him. Especially with dual revelations that they have romantic feelings for the other one. Even without the ending of this chapter, that would be a mess of a situation to wade through.
Even more admiration to Pam for the one to initiate the kiss. Grab ahold of Jim while you can and don't let go. Beautiful image there.
And there's Packer, face down in the lake. Nice to see that speculation so far has proved correct. However many people have motive to see Packer meet his demise. The opportunity is there too. Lots of people gathered in a large house off the beaten path. Now it comes a tale of who had the means to pull off the deed. All the set up to this moment means there's already a lot of ways this can go and I'm sure we're still in for a wild ride.
Superb writing.
1 [Report This]Date: December 27, 2020 02:32 pm Title: Chapter 2
“someone he didn’t actually know but was now referring to as “the woman of his dreams” in his inner monologue” Weird, because maybe I’m having similar thoughts about Savannah Jim...
“Jim said a quick prayer for the strength that would be necessary to make it through dinner.” I love that Andy and Dwight are still Andy and Dwight. All your set up of them made me chuckle.
Excuse me. Squeaky giggling? I’m —
There were so many snippets of brilliance within the greater brilliance. The little nods to canon were perfectly executed.
1 [Report This]Date: December 27, 2020 02:14 pm Title: Chapter 1
Oh BT! What a glorious setting of the scene. Your writing is so vivid, I feel like I’m the one stepping into the Savannah humidity. I’m already very intrigued to see where this is going - and to end it like that?! How dare you.
(But also, maybe I’m now a little glad that I have been so damn unforgivably slow to read this so that I can keep reading it immediately!)
Date: December 27, 2020 12:08 pm Title: Chapter 7
Not only you killed one of your secondary characters (side note: yay!), but you also killed me.
I'd like to die like that a million times again, though.
And, perhaps, that's the only review my damaged brain could form, sorry.
P.S. Nope, not the only one. My bets on Toby!
Date: December 27, 2020 11:23 am Title: Chapter 6
A quick stop on my reading:
"he was born to do just that."
My heart exploded. The whole 'cuddling together' scene is the sweetest, the most tender thing ever, and I want to save it in eternity and let you know that this is genius.
Date: December 27, 2020 10:27 am Title: Chapter 7
Where do I even start?? I totally get why Jim would be upset after waking up alone. It definitely would have seemed like Pam was going to him for comfort because she knew he wouldnt turn her down. But then finding out what actually happened? I was seeing red right there with Jim. I dont even care, thank GOODNESS Packer is dead. Good riddance. I am nervous tho that Pam is gonna be a suspect because of that situation. I wonder what Jim will think.
But more importantly, their confessions on the dock. Ugh. I am so glad that Pam admitted her feelings as well. And that she was the one to initiate the kiss.
As of right now my guess for the murderer is Creed or, wild card, Bob Vance (Vance Refrigeration). We’ll see how utterly wrong i am eventually. Again, this story is amazing and so captivating.
1 [Report This]Date: December 22, 2020 03:38 am Title: Chapter 6
"Once again he reminded himself that he was here to work, damnit, not find the love of his life." Weeelll, too late Jim.
I love this so much. The bath. The bed! All of it.
Date: December 20, 2020 05:37 pm Title: Chapter 6
I never want this fic to end!
1 [Report This]Date: December 20, 2020 10:42 am Title: Chapter 6
Ooh, the plot thickens. Why was Pam roaming around in the night, cold and damp? And the fact that she knocked on Jim's door and asked to sleep with him in his bed? Wow. I love how you're drawing out the tension here.
1 [Report This]Date: December 19, 2020 04:51 pm Title: Chapter 6
More and more layers added. Now Creed is in play with a grudge and saying to a reporter that he would like to kill Packer. Kevin seemingly being set up as the dim-witted fall guy seems to make sense too. Just when it feels like we get a few more piece to this puzzle out pop a few more with more and more questions raised.
And under it all is Jim pining after Pam. And then there she is. There's that crystal bridge again and there goes Jim walking out on it. Though this time Pam sought him out. There are still so many questions about everything going on. Can't wait to see where it all goes.
Until then I'll just bask in the image of Jim and Pam snuggled up in bed like that.
Date: December 19, 2020 01:38 pm Title: Chapter 6
A breakthrough! And courtesy of Kevin of all people! I adore this version of Kevin and how the Kevin-Jim bond shines through. You really nailed his voice.
Fixing games and possible ties to organized crimes? Something mysterious with horses? Packer has his fingers in a lot of different pies.
I love you giving a human dimension to Creed here. Poor guy. He's definitely heading for a false arrest for murder, though. And maybe a totally legitimate arrest for the growing of marijuana.
Oh, Toby.
This scene with Pam at the end is incredibly sweet. Poor girl! At least she's got someone there to get her through the night now. (Actually, were this not fanfic, I might be kinda suspicious of Pam, too. If, say, Roy were to turn up dead, she's taking a lot of the steps she'd need to get Jim sent up for it.)
You know, if I were Jim at this point and discovering all the ways Packer is corrupt and everything he has on everyone he invited, I might be starting to get a liiiiiiiittle concerned about what he might have on David Wallace.
New theory: victim is Packer, killer is Phyllis, but indirectly. (She called Bob, who is secretly for a killer for hire. You know, Bob Vance, Vance Assassinations.)
Date: December 19, 2020 12:00 pm Title: Chapter 6
I called Kevin's role, I CALLED it! Poor guy's just down on his luck and being taken advantage of because he's slow. It's like the canon but much more intense.
Stanley has more of a temper here than he does in the show. I love how you heightened his infidelity with the addition of Teri's CANCER, it makes him that much more unlikable. Not expected, but I dig it, especially considering it gives him a motive. His conversation with Phyllis only heightens things, and I wonder how she plays into all this.
A lot of neat interactions here. I love seeing Erin happy, that's always a treat. And even though we don't get a good look at Andy yet, you've got him down pat.
On Creed... this is the sanest he's ever been. The job you gave him was perfect, and his backstory is so friggin' sad. I hope there are some Creed-isms for us to enjoy soon!
I am LIVING for all these roles that the background characters have. Both Ed Truck and Jan a few chapters ago got me thinking of other characters and their place in this universe. Like Katy can be a successful singer on par with Andy (Amy Adams can sing and has played a role as such before) and Karen can be a fellow journalist working her way to the top, further hindered by her gender.
Ryan and Kelly's joke of a relationship is still there, and you're clearly having fun with it. Good.
Okay, it's Toby. I'm obviously taking a guess here, but he's only shown up twice and he makes my skin crawl. While in canon it can be argued that his creepiness is the result of his life being a wreck and him not doing anything about it resulting in his solemn, pathetic cadence, this Toby just frightens me. He's just... snippy with Jim for no reason. Maybe because Jim is everything he wants to be? And, oh dear Lord, I fear for Pam.
On that subject, I appreciate that you're making Jim hypervigilant when it comes to his job. He still has his aspirations as a big-time journalist, so he can't let Pam completely take over when he has a story to chase. That being said, their friendship is to the point where they trust one another, so at the very least he's made a friend. The ending moment of this chapter is pure feel-good fluff and it's an indication that they're gonna make it out of this and live happily ever after. Again, I could be wrong, but I know that I and the rest of the readership wants a positive outcome out of all of this.
This is the second time I've read a subtle "Casino Night" dress slip-in, nice.
This fic is so engrossing and dammit you got me, hook line, and sinker. I patiently await the murders!
Date: December 19, 2020 09:47 am Title: Chapter 6
BT. I really just want to know what Packer is up to, who's going to die (my guess is Packer), and what is going on. Every story you share in this draws me further in, I love it. I genuinely felt bad for Creed when he said that Packer had sold the horses. I hope Creed is able to get them back/get new ones soon. And then the ending with Pam wanting Jim to hold her? Jim truly must have been dying in the best way possible, because I know I was. I wonder what had happened to make her do that, but really who cares if it means we get a special scene like that. I can't wait to see what happens in the morning.
1 [Report This]Date: December 16, 2020 04:49 am Title: Chapter 5
Fantastic! That's the word I can describe this chapter. So many moments I like — an overheard conversation in the library (I cackled at the line about 'John' — what a lovely touch!) and Jim/Pam bathroom exchange and his thoughts (oh, I had goosebumps when I read that part! love it!). And colliding with Toby... I like Toby here (even if he turns out to be a murderer — always watch the quietest ones), and even more, I like that Jim had another perspective on his own deeds.
Thank you so much for your wonderful story and excellent writing!
P.S. I'm sure Stanley was talking with Phyllis. I know you won't give out anything, but I still like to make assumptions.
P. P. S. I feel that the next time Jim saw Packer, he was a corpse :) I can’t say that I’m sad about that, though…
1 [Report This]Date: December 14, 2020 06:56 pm Title: Chapter 5
“I don’t want to intrude.” That was a lie, he wanted very much to intrude in whatever way she would allow.
I mean. Ya. You got him there.
"He could have sworn he felt his heart explode before stitching itself back into the shape of her."
I just...I can't. I--
How do you words? That's fuckin' beautiful.
1 [Report This]Date: December 14, 2020 06:26 pm Title: Chapter 5
“Love Amid the Spanish Moss”
MA'AM
1 [Report This]Date: December 14, 2020 06:21 pm Title: Chapter 4
"Before Jim knew what was happening, Michael propped his foot up on the table next to Jim’s chair and leaned into it, almost like a lunge, but very close to Jim’s face."
ma'am. stop that.
"Jim stared at his clasped hands, afraid that if he took his eyes off of them they’d do something stupid like rub down Pam’s back or trace a finger down her cheek."
*ma'am*
*stop that*
The entire scene in the rain? Where he's staring at her and she's staring at him and--
How? Are you?? So fucking poetic???
This whole entire thing is about MURDER and I just--
You are an AU kween. Never stop (despite what I demanded earlier in this review).