so. so so so so so so cute.. almost as awesome as when john krasinski touched my arm.. ALMOST that awesome girl.. you've got a TALENT!

See this is why you rule the genre: writing a tyke that cute without making her the second coming of Shirley Temple (even credible - yet so adorable you could bite her - dialogue!) You pick just the right details - e.g., sticking out her tummy - to make her real, without overdoing it. Tasty as ever!


Author's Response: Why thank you Colette. Very kind of you to say indeed. ;-)  In my head Jill is quite adorable - but not perfect for sure. Seems she's picking up sort of a whiny thing. lol. Thanks for taking the time to review, as always. 

I've read your work for a long time and have even re-read this particular story several times. I love this universe you've created for Jim and Pam and I adore your characterization of both characters, including Jill. I love that you don't make Jim overly sappy and that you make sure to portray him as witty and sarcastic, which most writers seem to miss the mark when writing for Jim. In fact, in the fanfic realm, your characterization of Jim and Pam is one of my favorites. But I've noticed that your writing for this story and as of late with your most recent work have gotten a tad lazy. Earlier chapters for this story and your earlier work are so much stronger. You used to go into great detail describing scenes and the like. You put a lot of effort into it and it showed. Now, it's as though you're trying to quickly write something in order to post it up as soon as possible instead of taking your time with it. You and others may not share this opinion but since I'm such a fan of your earlier work, I want to plead you to take your time when writing because you truly are talented.

Author's Response: Goodtime Fella, it's nice to hear from someone who's been reading for so long. Glad you've enjoyed my work up until now. I appreciate your comments.  Typically (specifically with this story) I try and do something a little bit different stylistically from time to time.  Because it's such a long running story, I think it's helpful to mix things up a bit from time to time. If you'll notice, I change POV quite often and yes, often I will lean towards a more sparse storytelling style and sometimes I will be more descpritive if I think the chapter calls for that.  As a reader, I enjoy filling in my own blanks from time to time and I don't want the writer to describe every last detail all the time.  Sometimes the piece is about the dialogue and not the exposition at all.  I'm sorry you're not enjoying that, just wanted to let you in on my approach. Not everything is for everyone though. :-)

Oh, I loved this. Is it silly for me to be a little worried about this fictional characters and hoping it all goes okay the second time around? Probably, but there you go. Very sweet and very in character.

Author's Response: Here's a spoiler from me to you Jazzy...::whisper:: no need to be worried ;-).  Thanks so much for your loyal reviewing! LOVE IT!

10

Just wanted you to know that this is pretty much my favorite thing I've read on this website. It's the first thing I'm rating a 10. I guess I just love Jim and Pam still being in Love all those years later. I had an idea for a series about a girl who lives near the Halperts and becomes friends with them, but after reading this I think you've kind of covered that angle.

Very Cute. Jill reminds me SO much of my little neighbour that it is kind of freaky =) I can so picture her chubby little belly sticking out. You should definitely do a little firework chapter, I can so imagine Jill on his back or on his shoulders, awww. Now you have me thinking cute Jim/Daddy thoughts!!!

Author's Response: aw, you know I would have but I felt like I just wanted to capture this one little moment in time.  There will be plenty of moments for Jill to be on Jim's shoulders in the future. Thanks SO much for being such a loyal reviewer. You're awesome.

Haha, this reminds me sort of babysitting for my neighbors, because I feel slightly stalkerish. I look through their photo ablums (with the baby, she loves it), and read the notes on their calender.... and they aren't as cute as The Halperts, but definite resemblance.

i'm not going to sit here and copy and paste all of the lines i loved from this story. i just have to say i have NEVER related to a story or a chapter as much as i have for this one. i mean my god, i think i spend the majority of my life trying to decide whether i want to be adopted by the couples i admire or whether i just plain want to be them. i felt like this story was one of those thing on the internet where you can like cartoon-ize yourself to see how you'd look in the cartoon world. i've just been fanfic-ized? and i absolutely adored this chapter. fantastic idea, great writing, and i have no more words to say how relatable and honest it was.

laksdjlaksjd thank you for letting me know i'm not the only one who does this to admirable couples!

This is such a great idea written from a teenager's POV. And you've captured the teenager's voice perfectly. She admires their relationship and thinks the kid is cute, but also has the hots for Jim -classic. Wonderfully done.

10

lovefool, i simply cannot compete with this babyfic :)
this is the best thing i've ever read. every single chapter takes my breath away. please keep them coming! you should write one where we meet jill's grandparents!

I really liked this chapter and the different perspective of this young, starry-eyed teenager ... with her crush on the whole Halpert family.  Very sweet!

10

I have been following this story from day one and I love every chapter but I have to say this is the best thing I have ever read. I smiled just about the whole time. It was just amazing! I really loved this part and I actually laughed outloud!

""Here's the deal," Pam rambled on quietly to me. "I'll get to the front door and he still won't even have his shoes on...that's the way it goes...so the longer I stand here and talk to you the higher the likelihood that he'll actually be ready to go.""

Kinda reminds me of my boyfriend! lol It was really great seeing into their lives from the teenage girls P.O.V. and of COURSE she'd have a crush on Jim ;)

Just AWESOME