Date: February 11, 2010 11:57 am Title: Chapter 2 Ain't It Good to Know (You've Got a Friend)
I'm glad you put the bit of argument in the beginning, because it was so believable. People lose their temper and yell, even when they don't want to, before they try to reel everything back in. Them not having sex because they are afraid of making baby number 2 is another thing that happens to even the happiest of couples who are struggling, but sadly, it doesn't help the stress levels.
Author's Response: Thanks, I'm glad this all rang true to life for you. Yup, that stress is a killer.
10 [Report This]Date: November 08, 2009 02:17 pm Title: Chapter 2 Ain't It Good to Know (You've Got a Friend)
You've captured the reason that so many of us have fallen for Jim and Pam. No matter what happened, they were always and will always be friends. Can't wait to see how this ends.
Author's Response: Thanks Casinos and Coal Walks, for reading and reviewing.
10 [Report This]Date: November 03, 2009 06:53 pm Title: Chapter 2 Ain't It Good to Know (You've Got a Friend)
Oh, my God, jazzfan! This story is so good, it's killing me! So realistic, especially in these times, and really a subject that's not been written about a whole lot (and I read a lot of TO fic!) I've always pictured Jim as the guy who didn't have to try, but success sort of always landed in his lap. Very realistic and possible scenario that you've created. Please post the next chapter soon. It is so easy to feel for Jim as the guy who doesn't want to fail his family, yet is struggling with such a personal issue. I would love to know a little more about what the Evil!Pete said to him. Flashback, perhaps?
Author's Response: Mountaineers02, I would tell you what Evil!Pete actually said, but I'm pretty sure Jim would prefer that I kept it quiet, don't you think? *grin* It's gratifying to hear that this scenario is believeable, and yeah, Jim is an easy guy to cheer for. Thanks so much for taking the time to read and comment. The last chapter needs a little more work (my betas set me straight), but I should have it up by the weekend for sure.
Date: November 03, 2009 03:03 pm Title: Chapter 2 Ain't It Good to Know (You've Got a Friend)
cute, even through the tough times =]
Author's Response: Thanks ilovetoJAM.
10 [Report This]Date: November 03, 2009 09:14 am Title: Chapter 2 Ain't It Good to Know (You've Got a Friend)
jazzfan, remember the scene in "Frame Toby", where Pam said, "You bought me a house" and they hugged, seemingly at the top of the world? This chapter was the complete opposite of what Jim must have felt in that episode.
The tone you've set, the feelings and atmosphere you've created for Jim and Pam during this difficult period of their lives were just so well-written, so honest, that I hurt for them. But I loved the way you ended this chapter, full of hope and the fact that they're in sync once again.
Looking forward to the next chapter!
Author's Response: Wow, I hadn't thought of the "you bought me ahouse" as being the opposite, but it is. Exactly. Thanks for that, and I hope you like the resolution.
10 [Report This]Date: November 03, 2009 08:54 am Title: Chapter 2 Ain't It Good to Know (You've Got a Friend)
I was so excited to see a new chapter. And this was another beautiful one. I really like how you show their struggle, how small things are used for celebration. Plus, I completely felt the desolation in this setting, dark, quiet, too empty house, icy rain falling outside. Really well done. And that final scene between Pam and Jim was so true to life and I'm glad that Pam pulled Jim back to her. I can't wait to see what happens in the next chapter. You've done a great job with a difficult subject and have made it so sadly realistic.
Author's Response: Thanks albie, for your comments. I tend to use the weather as a parallel so I'm glad it came off. I hope you think the last chapter works, I've tried something a little different with the weather.
Date: November 03, 2009 07:43 am Title: Chapter 2 Ain't It Good to Know (You've Got a Friend)
Another strong chapter. I have to echo others and say that this whole thing is just so achingly real. The situation and their reactions to it.
You've put a lot of attention to getting the details right, and I just love reading a fic where I can tell that the writer has really thought about everything... Does that make sense? Well, in any case, this shows that you want to develop and improve as a writer and that's just all kinds of awesome.
So many things ring so true in this chapter. The fight about the door and the wet clothes that's really about something else. After that in the kitchen: "We both know we’re frustrated, but everything still feels stiff and scripted." Scripted is such a good word to use there, because it immediately conveys what's going on and what they're trying to do.
It makes sense that during a time like this their old communication issues would re-surface. Things like that can make or break a marriage, and it's nice that you've managed to write this in a way that makes it clear that they still love each-other deeply, even though they have real problems in their relationship as well. I'm not sure I express myself right here... What I mean is you've found a balance between saccharine "as long as I have you my love" sentiment and ugly, over the top and OOC fighting.
“I guess what I’m trying to say is that I was your friend before I was your wife." Yes! That's what I'm talking about. I believe in their marriage because they not only love but also like each-other, and that little speech of Pam's sums it up so well, in my opinion.
I have to respectfully disagree with an earlier reviewer and say that selling playground equipment would be a perfect job for Jim, which is probably part of the reason why he wanted it badly enough to get desperate and also really depressed when he "blew" it.
Lastly: Team Boy! Maybe we should get t-shirts?
Author's Response: I've got the t-shirts ordered! Team Boy. (they're blue, of course) *grin*
Thank you very much for all your comments, SyK, this is the kind of review that makes a writer's day. I admit I'm kind of obsessive about details, so thanks for noticing - I'm really trying. As a science major, I know I have a lot to learn about this world of words.
Regarding the fight- if there's one thing I've learned by being married so long is that fights are never about what they seem to be about on the surface, so I tried to use that here. Friendship and humor are ultimately the glue that keep things working.
I thought Jim would like the playground sales, so glad you agree.
Again, I can't tell you how much I appreciate your detailed review. Thanks so much. Hope the last chapter doesn't disappoint.
10 [Report This]Date: November 03, 2009 07:04 am Title: Chapter 2 Ain't It Good to Know (You've Got a Friend)
Dude, this is SO good. I love me some Jim angst. I love how Pam is being all strong and "talk to me damnit," < and Pete, what a jerkcake :(
UPDATE NOOOOOOOOW!
Author's Response: It seems I like torturing poor Jimpert, I tend to pick on him a lot in my fics. Not sure what that says about me. And yeah, Pete is kind of a bitch and Pam's a good kid. The last chapter is written and as soon as it's beta'd and I can tidy it up a bit, I'll get sent in. Thanks so much for reading and reviewing.
Date: November 03, 2009 06:31 am Title: Chapter 2 Ain't It Good to Know (You've Got a Friend)
Very nice. I am glad Jim and Pam talked.
Author's Response: Thanks MyriadProBold. Hope you like the last chapter as well.
Date: November 02, 2009 11:54 pm Title: Chapter 2 Ain't It Good to Know (You've Got a Friend)
Jazz, I just love you. I'm sorry if that's weird for you to hear - but I need you to hear it...once. This is just so real. My gut is like clenched the whole time I'm reading this, and then when Jim started to talk -- really talk at the end it was like...:::sigh::: yes - let it out! Man, I hope things look up for these two kids. I think you've done such a fabulous job of incorporating some new canon here with Jim's family dynamic. What a plethora of new stuff we can all use now huh? Knowing what we know about his brothers and dad. Just great.
Going back a minute to talk specifically about one detail that I loved...I loved that they had no idea how Daniel happened and that's what was keeping them from making love. UGH...knife to my heart there.
Again - really, really good.
Author's Response: lovefool, I...I...can't... *snork* I'm tickled that you are enjoying this. There's one last chapter and it's being beta'd. It starts a little...different, so we'll see if you like that one. That wedding episode is a treasure trove for fanfic writers, isn't it? So much new family information. *rubs hands together* Thanks so much for your comments. ps - I mean they know "how" Daniel happened, but not "how". *laughs*
Date: November 02, 2009 09:17 pm Title: Chapter 2 Ain't It Good to Know (You've Got a Friend)
this story is just great. i was so glad to see an update from you when i got home! i can't wait to see what you have in store for the next chapter.
also, i'm so glad you made them seem realistically poor, and not destitute. and that pam reminds jim that they're friends and spouses. the best part was him giving in and reverting back to his old self to talk about the interview. he was so worried about her being disappointed in him when she got home, and at the end he's able to make her laugh about it. really great chapter.
Author's Response: Hey yanana. Thanks for your comment about the "realistically poor" situation. I tried my best not to venture into melodrama. I think it's true that the most important part of a relationship sometimes is just being there, and being able to laugh in the tough times. I appreciate your perspective, and I hope you like the final act.
Date: November 02, 2009 08:16 pm Title: Chapter 2 Ain't It Good to Know (You've Got a Friend)
Oh this fic is tough to read because it's so realistic but I like it a lot. It's hard to see them struggle but Pam is so true, they have to stick together. Can't wait to see what happens next.
Author's Response: Glad you like it, Bayib. The last chapter should be up as soon as I get it back from being beta'd and have a chance to tidy it up. Hope you like it, too, it's a little different. Thanks!
10 [Report This]Date: November 02, 2009 07:45 pm Title: Chapter 2 Ain't It Good to Know (You've Got a Friend)
This is so well written, and so true to life. The inner monologue is spot on, and I really appreciate you showing them working through it in a calm manner, instead of arguing. I love that Pam is truly there for him no matter what. I really liked that about this chapter.
Author's Response: Well, they did have a little spat at the beginning. *grin* But I think our kids are solid. Thanks for the read and review.
10 [Report This]Date: November 02, 2009 07:45 pm Title: Chapter 2 Ain't It Good to Know (You've Got a Friend)
wow. this is so sad, yet optimistic, which is why i keep reading. you keep coming back to the love in their family which is what's keeping the three halperts together - and i'm really proud of you for writing such a challenging story.
this is especially hard for me to read because for about 3 years my dad was out of work, then my mom lost her job then quickly found a new one but for years after that we were still really tight on money so this is kind of a flash to the past. but this is so well written and shows all the love in the family which reminds me of my family too, how we managed to get through such hard times.
great job with this story, and i'm looking forwards to the next chapter! if you ever need a beta let me know, i'm glad to help but you seem to be covered in that area! just to keep in the back of your mind, though!
Author's Response: Sorry to hear about your past family situation, pamelamorganhalpert, but it's a common one these days, and I'm glad you all managed to get through it all. Thanks for your encouragement, and for the beta offer, too. Sometimes my regular betas get busy, and it's nice of you to offer.
Date: November 02, 2009 07:06 pm Title: Chapter 2 Ain't It Good to Know (You've Got a Friend)
This is very good writing! I love the inner monologue you have going on here! I was sad to read that there's only one more chapter... sigh! I hope we get to hear more from you!
Author's Response: Thanks, Dedeen. The last chapter is off being beta'd, so it shouldn't be long. I hope the last chapter provides a satisfactory resolution to the story for you. Thanks for the review, too.