10

WOW! SO each chapter is getting both a bit more frustrating in some respects and a bit easier to take in others.

Oh Jim, Jim, Jim... when are you EVER going to learn two things? 1) running doesn't solve ANYTHING. You ran from your family. You fell in love but because of the circumstances allowed your dad to poison your mind about the person you loved and you lost her. You ran from Scranton to Stamford from Pam to Karen and what did it solve? Not a thing. Your memories went with you and no matter what you did, you simply couldn't outrun those. Now you've run all the way to Australia and you think you've won. You have a nice change of scenery and while studying you are able to at least live with the memories but really Jim, how long are you going to be able to keep it up? THe only way to get the past to stop haunting you is to stop running and face it. Not to mention, you're missing some pretty huge events in your own life while you are doing all this running. The second thing I wonder when you are going to learn is, if what you are doing is making your dad happy, then HE is controlling your life and you are playing into his hands, not the other way around. I mean really Jim? You really think that you are just THE man now and you have somehow let your dad know loud and clear that this is your life and you're living it your way? You've lived close to thirty years now (I'm assuming you have him the same age he was on the show when Cece was born, sorry if I'm wrong. I'm not even certain of his age on the show right now. Around thirty or just over it I think) you've lived THAT long and you STILL don't know your own dad well enough to know when he's the one in control. How very, very sad. I found it interesting but crazy sad in my mind that 1) his parents, unknowingly to his mom, attended their grandchild's baby shower and 2) Jim heard all about his own baby's shower from his mom. Interesting that Gerry is attending these things. I'm guessing that it's all part of him really keeping tabs on Pam but I have to thinkhope when it all comes out and Pam and Jim realizes the rolr that he played and just how disgustingly manipulative he was that they never let him have anything at all to do with this baby. He is costing his son what we all know would be the very happiest time of Jim's life and he's doing it simply because he doesn't feel that Pam is worthy of the Halperts. I hope that in this case, unlike on the show, that his dad never get the chance to wear a kilt to his wedding because I know if he was MY future FIL and he did these disgusting things there is NO freaking way he would be AT my wedding! UGH! I kept wishing during the phone call that Jim's mom would mention Pam's name and maybe how long ago the accident happened and maybe, just maybe that would at least catch Jim's attention at least a little. If he had just a tiny clue I think he would start unraveling his dad's behavior and he's be able to see that from the time his dad showed up in Scranton he has been playing every move he makes right into his dad's hands and he doesn't want to do that! I can't help but wonder just what the fallout is going to be when Jim finds out that his dad has known from pretty early on just where Pam is and chose to hide it from Jim. I mean, the reason, that he doesn't think Pam is good enough rather thab that he is worried about Pam doing what Katy did is pretty obvious since Pam ran away from all that rather than trying to be any part of it. Oh and BTW, very intereting way of working Katy into the story. I don't know why since we didn't know much about her, but I can see her doing that. I saw where you said on the boards where we will know in the next chapter if Jim makes it for the birth... thinking about it is making me a little ill. I'm wondering if I should skip the next chapter??? It's another of those hitting way too close to home things. It looks lkes some wounds must never heal if reading fan fiction stories can open them back up! ACK!!! Anyhow, I don't know if I have ever despised a character in any of the fan fiction stories I have read, quite as much as I despise Jim's father. Men like this, ruthless businessmen that see people as pawns to be bought and sold, they shouldn't be able to have children! Oh wait! I just thought of something else... so Jim wants nothing to do with his family, wants to be his own man, stand on his own two feet but c'mon Jim. You say all of this and then are obviously allowing your family to support you while you are living in Australia and pay for you to get more schooling for something you KNOW your dad finds to be frivolous. None of this gives you pause Jim? I really REALLY hope you're going to get your brain back before you find Pam again. In the state you are right now you are too stupid for Pam and she would have every right to be extremely EXTREMELY angrt with you and decide to date Roy to spite you because lets face it, while she is deaking with pregnancy without her partner, being unconfortable and sad and lonely, you have been in a months long relationship including spening Thanksgiving with and meeting the new girl's parents. THAT would make me REALLY question if you had ever loved me at all. Then you go and start a new life halfway around the world. All the time Pam is dealing with the new life growing inside her and the fact that she can't REALLY run away from you at all because that part of you that is growing inside of her is always reminding her of you. It's really REALLY time to grow up Jim. Time to actually be your own man, like you were in Scranton. Stand on your own two feet rather than having your family support you. You are going to need to somehow let Pam know when you guys meet again that you are not your dad's pawn or anything like your dad and that you are actually worthy of her on your child. I have faith in you Jim but you have a long way to go!

Soooooo Roy is back. I knew the last few chapters being Roy free were simply too good to be true. I just don't even know WHAT to say about his gift to the baby except ummm, inappropriate! But then, he was trying to get a message across and he did. He didn't get the results he wanted, but the message got across. I couldn't help but get really angry at him when he told Pam, he's never cpming back. I mean, he doesn't have any clue what's going to go on. I just think it's pretty crappy to try to move in on her in such a vulnerable condition. On top of that it's while she is indebted to his family though actually, if the situation with Pam and the baby DID actually put Adele into remission, which, that can't REALLY happen, can it? (Color me stupid!) Then they are WAY FAR indebted to Pam rather than the other way around. The thing is, if Adele is in remission, with no apparent end in sight, isn't it time for them to put an end to this charade? I mean, it was done all for Adele's health because they felt the truth would kill her in her fragile condition. I mean, where is the end to this for Pam??? I can certainly understand Pam's feelings about the baby shower. This is all bringing up again for me, where is Pam's mom? We know that she does some kind of traveling based on Jim's memories when he met her but it seems with her daughter pregnant and having a baby shower and such, it just seems like her mom would do whatever it would take to be around at this time. I mean, her mom could maybe extract her from this situation with the Andersons. Anyhow, I can imagine that Pam, being a small town, sweet girl, would be overwhelmed and not entirely welcoming of this type of a baby shower. I mean, when I had my showers I cannot imagine it being just tons of people that I simply didn't know. I imagine a shower like that would make her crave a Micheal Scott shower. I think she would resent being expected to write thank yous to people she just doesn't know. I bet she always imagined a cozy shower with her friends, family, co workers, people that she cares about and that care about her. This makes me just sad for Pam and for what her first experience of becoming a mom has turned into. I have to imagine about now Pam has to be really beginning to long for something familiar. She's right now just really not in her element at all.

Anyhow, sorry I let the shower thoughts intrude on the Roy thoughts, I'm just REALLY so relieved that Pam, even in a vulnerable state, held her ground with Roy, being adamant that she is glad to have him as a friend and that's all. Then again, maybe with that reminder of Jim ever present, she isn't quite as vulnerable as it seems she would be.

You know, it's nice that Adele is giving Pam permission to move on though she doesn't even know the story, doesn't know what price Pam has Pam mentally on Adele's behalf. Interesting how you were able to work that conversation so it worked PERFECT in both the context of Adele speaking about Kenny and Pam speaking about Jim. Of course, what Adele doesn't understand is that it would I am certain be far easier for Pam to move on if Kenny had been the dad. If Pam knew the father was dead and there was no chance at all of things working out, at some point you have no choice but to move on. With Pam, well, she's the one that walked away ad he's out there. She's never tried to contact him and I can see more and more that she really wants to. I like that Pam is realizing how much she wants Jim and how much she is healing. I know that time does heal wounds but I would bet with Pam it's that timy life growing within her getting closer and closer to being born that is doing more of the healing than time is at this point. Anyhow, I love her thought about if Jim walked through her bedroom door the hurt he caused would not surpass her happiness to have him back. I hope she does have him back and I sncerely hope it happens really soon. They have each suffered too much at his dad's hands and I want to see them come back together, a united front and stand up to the bully!

Another solid chapter. Oh and no matter where you got that line in the last chapter, you put it to BRILLIANT use. It was really awesome and the way you used it was perfect. I'm glad you saved it and used it here. I had a favorite line this time too, not as much as the last one but I really liked it...

Aren’t babies such a nice way to start people?


That was really nice and I liked Pam thinking it while thinking about their baby. I'll be honest, I'm either REALLY looking forward to or REALLY REALLY dreading the next chapter. Do you know how awful it is to just not know which? I admit, I'm looking forward to getting to some fluff here perhaps more than I've ever looked forward to it in a fan fic story. Certainly more than I ever have for a WIP that I've had to wait VERY paitently to get to it. It really is a testament to your skill as a writer that this story honestly has drained me emotionally in many chapters, yet I have continued to come back. You have gotten me so invested in the characters and the outcome that I just have this compulsive need to see it through. Really says a lot for your talent.

Thanks again for sharing!

Author's Response: Our little JIm is never going to learn... But he will soon enough. I promise. Your whole Jim/Pam analysis is very accurate. Jim doens't know that he is only falilng into another trap his dad had set up for him. Gerry is such an evil character, but he will get what he deserves. A little spolier - Jim/ Gerry confrontation chapter is by far my favorite chapter. I can't wait to post it and see ya'll reaction.

Adele is the nicest, right? She's going to play a bigger role and you'll be surprised with how she comes out the other end. When I first began outlining this story, Adele was the one I needed to be there for Pam. Adele was "sane" perso, who pan would ultimately look up too and the reason why she just didn't throw the towel in and left. Their bond is very important to the unvailing of the remainder of the story.

I want to apologize for the next chapter. But I promise the following ones will make up for it. I know this hit too close to home - and I appreciate your sincerity and openess and girl I'm completly devoted to this fic because I know someone out there cares enough about it to really connect to the story and connect with me. everytime there's a review from you I jump on my chair like a kid on xmas eve!

Thanks you bunches, -D

Yay! Close to fluff! I guess thats why you got roy out of the way now. Funny phone conversation too. So close, so far. Keep going!

Author's Response: Yeah... so close but so far! But we are getting extremely close to Jim realizing his dad is more ruthless than he thought. It's time for out little Jimmy to get some balls, right? Thanks for reading and reviewing!

I forgot to tell you how honoured I am that you review my fic, your writing i just so amazing. Loved how Pam and Adele (is it wrong that I think of Adele the singer when I read this, like Roy's mom IS Adele LOL) anyway, this is so good, I really can't wait to see what happens next. Jim in Australia is strangely sexy(imagining him surfing mmmm) ;)

Update soon xx

Author's Response: Dude! I love Accidentally in Love! Promise me that if you don't let that one go, I won't let this one go either? Promise? Pink swear?? You are NOT wrong to think of Adele as Adele the singer... I love ADELE - hints the title of this fic "Set fire to the Rain" one of my favorite songs! Haha... Adele is definitely playing in thebackground whenever I'm writing this fic! Jim anywhere is sexy (maybe because I love John and he is my imaginary hubby, as I'm sure he's to many others..lol) Thanks for reading and reviewing!