10 [Report This]Date: November 30, 2008 08:56 pm Title: Chapter 1 (Chapters 1-4)
Ooooooooooh I am really liking where you are going with this. So happy she went to see Jim. Can't wait to see what you have planned next!
10 [Report This]Date: April 10, 2007 05:01 pm Title: Chapter 2 (Chapters 5-6)
Oh YES he gets her! He guessed about the wastebasket. Perfect Jim. :)
10 [Report This]Date: March 28, 2007 07:36 pm Title: Chapter 2 (Chapters 5-6)
Loved this! Jim's poem almost broke my heart but then it was mended quickly after Pam read it and realization finally dawned on her. If only it had happened this way. Such a romantic story.
Date: March 23, 2007 09:40 pm Title: Chapter 2 (Chapters 5-6)
Wow, very hot and you really got some very Jammy moments in here. I love the dinner that Jim made her. I think you also handled the friends hooking up under an emotional crisis transition really well - very realistic. I also love that in the end, he knew what she was going to say, OF COURSE.
Some really great sentences in here too:
He had wondered, of course, many times, what she would be like here, and had despaired of ever knowing. So to hear her soft moans and feel her thrusts meeting his as they connected was an indescribable thrill beyond any mere physical sensation. This just strikes me as so beautifully written.
“Well, I’ve wanted to do that for years, so I should hope I was prepared to do it right.” He paused. “But I’m convinced I can do better if you’d like to try again a little later.”
WOW, just WOW.
Great chapter and definitely not for the kids. Can't tell if you plan to write more, but I'd be all for it. And yes the typos were better, sorry for being such a nerd.
Author's Response: Thanks so much! You give such awesome reviews. I'm glad UNC rallied last night. I feel obliged to add to this at some point since the Roy thing is hanging but I have a sequel to The Second Art Show brewing in my head that I may do first. I wondered if peple would find it realistic that Jim had figured out that she had read it....I think he could very easily have put two and two together.
Date: March 23, 2007 02:29 pm Title: Chapter 2 (Chapters 5-6)
awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww
Author's Response: Thankssssssssssssssssssss
Date: March 23, 2007 01:46 pm Title: Chapter 2 (Chapters 5-6)
I have sometimes wondered what would have happened if Pam had just said "Roy, I'm doing this. Sorry if you're not happy about it." I love your version of it.
I love how Pam's mom is supportive. Usually she is written as sympathetic, supportive, and the kind of mom we all want (and I actually have, so I'm pretty lucky!). But I've seen Pam's mom a couple of times in fanfic portrayed as being upset about the breakup, or (once) disapproving of Jim. That seems so crazy to me! You portrayed Pam's mom the way she is in my head, so thanks.
I just really like this story a lot. Roy nixing the art program should have been a major wake-up call for Pam; it's too bad it wasn't in the show. You've done really well here. But... if you continue... Roy's gonna kill Jim Halpert.
Author's Response:
The little glimpses we've had of Pam's mom on the show definitely support a sympathetic portrayal, and if we acept that she wants what is best for her daughter and is reasonably obervant, she would have to be at least a little pro-Jim and anti-Roy. Thanks as always for your feedback!
Date: March 23, 2007 12:08 pm Title: Chapter 2 (Chapters 5-6)
:D Thank you! That so should have happened.
Author's Response:
You're welcome. And I agree.
10 [Report This]Date: March 23, 2007 06:44 am Title: Chapter 2 (Chapters 5-6)
This is such a sweet story.....They are too cute. Please write more !! I love it :)
Author's Response: Thanks! I plan to do a third chapter eventually but I have another story I may write first.
Date: March 23, 2007 06:32 am Title: Chapter 1 (Chapters 1-4)
I'm really enjoying your story so far and I hope you continue.
"I’m fine with my choices” The saddest Goddamn words I’ve ever heard "
Powerful stuff.
Author's Response: Thanks! I think that sentiment was true for Jim.
Date: March 22, 2007 11:11 pm Title: Chapter 1 (Chapters 1-4)
Well that's just a big ol' bundle of cute is what that is.
Author's Response: Thanks...I tend not to hold back on the cuteness.
10 [Report This]Date: March 22, 2007 09:50 pm Title: Chapter 2 (Chapters 5-6)
I really enjoyed reading it! Nice job!
Author's Response: Thanks! I enjoyed writing it.
Date: March 22, 2007 09:16 pm Title: Chapter 1 (Chapters 1-4)
This was just great! I love seeing Pam break out and do something about her life. May not be realistic but dang how could you not after reading a poem like that. It gave me goose bumps! Keep it coming.
Author's Response: Thanks a lot! I just posted part 2, hope you like.
Date: March 22, 2007 08:25 pm Title: Chapter 1 (Chapters 1-4)
Oh my. You must continue, this is just too good to abandon. I'm afraid I have to insist.
Author's Response: Your insistence has been accomodated. Enjoy.
Date: March 22, 2007 06:57 pm Title: Chapter 1 (Chapters 1-4)
This is really good! (Not surprising, as I enjoy all of your stories.)
I don't think I've read a story yet that comes out of Pam turning down the internship, with that being the impetus for her to leave Roy. I loved the plot device of the poem to open Pam's eyes and cause her to reexamine her life.
Can't wait to see what happens in the next chapter!
Author's Response: Thnaks so much. Part 2 is up and I'm back to my smutty ways. While I think the story probably exaggerates Pam's ability to change quickly, I do think the timing was right after Boys and Girls.
Date: March 22, 2007 05:39 pm Title: Chapter 1 (Chapters 1-4)
This story was just heating up when, you ended it? Wha-Wha-What? No seriously, you know I love a cliffhanger. I think you could leave it and it would be very good as is, or you can go on to confront the JAM interaction head on - and that would be great too. I like that she found the poem and I think you really got Jim's feelings right in that poem. The break-up with Roy did feel sudden, but I was fine with that, I love the second half - really good character development.
One suggestion, do you use a beta? I really have remarkable little confidence myself and use one or two depending on the story just to double check whether I am getting across what I want and how it reads to another before posting. Also, they help keep me honest on grammar and spelling. I only mention because you have a few spots where you have typos and a beta would catch that. Just a suggestion, I do think your writing is great all on its own too.
Author's Response:
The cliffhanger hangs no more. I'm just too impatient for my own good; I reread part 1 and cringed several times at the typos. Hopefully part 2 is a little cleaner, though in one respect you'll find it much less clean. Enjoy, and good luck to your Tar Heels.
9 [Report This]Date: March 22, 2007 05:26 pm Title: Chapter 1 (Chapters 1-4)
Probably not too likely but still very lovely! Might be more realistic if she stumbled upon the Christmas card or something and gave it awhile before bolting. But intriguing nonetheless! I'm looking forward to the next chapters :)
Author's Response: It was a little contrived I agree, but it still appealed to me. I hope you enjoy part 2.
Date: March 22, 2007 05:05 pm Title: Chapter 1 (Chapters 1-4)
Ahhhh ! Lovely more more pleaseee !
Author's Response:
Thank you and enjoy part 2.
Date: March 22, 2007 04:36 pm Title: Chapter 1 (Chapters 1-4)
This is really very good. You can't stop there, though! Please update. Soon.
Author's Response: Thanks, and I have updated.
Date: March 22, 2007 03:30 pm Title: Chapter 1 (Chapters 1-4)
Ooh, this isn't complete? I would love to read more! Poor Pining!Jim.
Author's Response:
More is posted, and Pining!Jim is no longer pining. Thanks for the review.
Date: March 22, 2007 02:50 pm Title: Chapter 1 (Chapters 1-4)
YOU HAVE TO CONTINUE! This Roy scares me because he scares Pam. Eek, more soon por favor!
Author's Response: Thanks, and I just posted part 2. Hope you enjoy.