10 [Report This]Date: March 12, 2007 07:21 pm Title: Mosquitoes
I could see this. I could actually, physically, believably see this. It was like I was watching the show - no...it was like I was standing there with Jim and Pam and Karen and Roy. It was like I was waiting to help Pam hold Jim back. It was so fucking real that it wasn't until I finished chapter 4 that I realized I'd barely been breathing.
This...this is more than I can put into words. Oh, my God.
Author's Response: WOW! Thank you so much! I'm glad that you've found it so engaging! Hopefully I can keep that up in chapter five :)
Date: March 12, 2007 06:56 am Title: Mosquitoes
One of the funniest things I think about is how you said that you didn't really think this was much of a cliffhanger, but everyone is still like GAH WHAT HAPPENS NEXT?!
It makes me giggle shan! And I was a little sad inside when you deleted the "I Dont work in this van" moment! But I got over it when Jim started punching Roy. :) That was just too great, and Jim/Pam standing there? *sigh* I can't wait to hear the little ping for new mail from you! And my fingers are recovring quite quickly and you will be receiving holiday fluff soon *hopes*
Author's Response:
I KNOW! I was like, 'Oh man. This cliffy is really sub-par.' Heh. Well I guess you never know!
I'm sorry but I just had to take out the "I don't work in this van" moment, because it was soooo distracting for me! Hee! And you might be getting a ping sometime tonight. I have a verrrrry rough outline.
Date: March 12, 2007 04:29 am Title: Mosquitoes
I was on pins and needles wating for this chapter, and it was sooo worth the wait
Can NOT wait until the next one ;)
Author's Response: Oh, I'm glad it was worth it Pam! I've already got about three pages of rough dialogue written, but I also have like five essays due this week, so we'll see how it goes :)
Date: March 11, 2007 05:11 pm Title: Mosquitoes
I really love reading a story that involves some confrontation between Jim and Roy that doesn't seem like a parody. I really love the pacing and how this is handled. Well done! Can't wait to read more. :)
Author's Response: Thank you for your comments :) I love getting specific feedback like this. I try to pay close attention to the pacing, so that means a lot.
Date: March 11, 2007 05:01 pm Title: Mosquitoes
i registered on this site JUST so i could give you a review for this story. i think that it is absolutely fantastic and get so excited whenever i see that you update it. you have captured the characters perfectly and make it so exciting to read. GREAT JOB!
Author's Response: Awww! Thank you so much! That seriously makes me giddy! I'm so happy that I was your first ;) FanTAStic name, by the way.
Date: March 11, 2007 04:16 pm Title: Mosquitoes
Where to begin? Your Michael is so spot-on that I was laughing out loud. Necrophiliac? Priceless.
I love the way you've managed to sustain the mosquito metaphor here - so apt, almost making me feel sorry for Karen. Almost. (Seriously, how dare she obstruct that call?)
....Aaaand that's the best I can do, knowing that there's another chapter waiting for me.
Terrific story!
Author's Response: Wow! This means so much coming from you, because I'm the biggest fan of your stories! I find myself often feeling almost bad for Karen. I don't particularly like the depiction of Krazy!Karen, so I figured I'd take sort of a middle road here. She can be cool, but she certainly isn't perfect. Thank you so much for your review!
9 [Report This]Date: March 08, 2007 05:46 pm Title: Mosquitoes
Wow, I love the spin you're putting on this scenario! And I love how you set up everything to come to a head. Finally, I love Jim's reaction when Pam shows up in the parking lot -- very realistic and you handled it really well. Great job! Can't wait for more!!!
Author's Response: Thank you! Annoyed!Jim is extremely fun to write :)
Date: March 08, 2007 05:17 pm Title: Mosquitoes
I am enjoying this story quite a bit. And I am in no way tired of Post Cocktail stories. Especially since you are able to make this one interesting and compelling.
Author's Response: Oh good! I'm not tired of the Post-Cocktails fic either. But then again, I never tired of Post-Casino Night stuff, so I have a very high tolerance for episode-related fic :) I'm glad that you're enjoying it!
Date: March 04, 2007 10:59 pm Title: Mosquitoes
Hi Shan! Thanks for letting me know it'll be a few days...but I can still hope. Man, WHAT is going to happen. Worse before it gets better huh? I can totally see that. With Pam showing up I imagine things are going to get eve more tumultuous (sp?)
Author's Response: Tumultuous, definitely. I have three pages of dialogue written, so it's going well. I'm hoping to have less dialogue and more inner monologue in this one. I'm also thinking I'll use Pam's POV for most of it.
Date: March 04, 2007 08:54 pm Title: Mosquitoes
OMG!!! SCARY!!!!...Stupid Karen! UGH, maybe you should give Jim the phone next time?!...ok, moving on to the next chapter...omg...
Author's Response: I know right? Karen... such a pain! And this will sound weird but I'm glad that I scared you :)
Date: March 04, 2007 07:04 pm Title: Mosquitoes
I love it - seriously every word is awesome. You handled the confrontation so well, and I love that Karen was confused about the Kiss! Seriously, don't make us wait too long ok?
Author's Response: Thanks! I looooove "A Little Courage Goes A Long Way" by the way. Maybe I'll ransom chapter 3 of this story until we get chapter 6 of yours...
Date: March 04, 2007 05:17 pm Title: Mosquitoes
OMG I cannot WAIT for the next chapter! This is awesome!
Author's Response: Ha! Thanks :) I'll try to get the next chapter out sooner than I got this one out.
Date: March 02, 2007 01:58 pm Title: Mosquitoes
Aww, Jan has necrophelia and Karen and Jim are in a monogrammed relationship. Good story. I want more, because I want to know what Roy does!
Author's Response: You got it!
Date: March 01, 2007 07:34 pm Title: Mosquitoes
oh I love and hate the metaphor of Pam being a mosquito...I mean it's perfect but my Pam is not a mosquito!
more please! :)
Author's Response:
Thanks!
Pam is most definitely not a mosquito. I think it's more Karen's own nagging doubts about Jim's relationships with both herself and Pam that the mosquitoes are meant to represent. But it did end up sounding sort of like Pam is a mosquito. If true, she would be the rockin'est mosquito ever.
9 [Report This]Date: March 01, 2007 04:08 pm Title: Mosquitoes
Oh, Karen. I loooove your descriptions of how she feels about him- and the imagery of the mosquito is inspired.
But Karen, honey? It's about to bite you hard.
Author's Response:
Yes. Yes it is.
Thanks so much nqllisi!!
8 [Report This]Date: February 28, 2007 08:08 pm Title: Mosquitoes
Ouch. My heart hurt reading all the sweet Karen and Jim moments. And then you leave us with such a cliff hanger. I can't wait to read the next chapter!
Author's Response: Thanks! No worries, kaystar. There aren't going to be any sweet Karen and Jim moments in chapter two. Although I can't promise you that chapter two won't end in another cliffhanger...
Date: February 28, 2007 07:27 pm Title: Mosquitoes
Oh, man, it's SO nice to see a Karen this real and sympathetic and *herself* -- not prone to giggling, having little relationship things with Jim (the gas game!). And MICHAEL with his WORDS -- necrophilia and monogrammed. But seriously, thanks so much for showing Karen's perspective on things.
Author's Response: Hey, no problem kyra! I'm glad you like my portrayal of Karen. Even though I don't want her with Jim, I can't muster up any malice toward her and sometimes I think she gets a bum deal. There will be a bit more Karen POV in the next chapter, although I think It's going to be mainly Jim's POV.
10 [Report This]Date: February 28, 2007 04:33 pm Title: Mosquitoes
OMGGG WRITE !! I NEEDDD TO HEAR WGHAT HAPPENS NEXT!! Dude, i'm saving this in my faves, so i can keep clickin to see when u add chapter two!
Author's Response: Hahahaha! Oh my God, this is hilarious. THANK you! I feel the need to update really fast now! I'll try to have chapter two sent to my betas by tomorrow night.
Date: February 28, 2007 03:19 pm Title: Mosquitoes
Wow, intense! I love seeing Karen's perspective on this. The mosquito analogy works really well and I love how even her fun prank kind of gets turned into something else when she realizes it only worked because he doesn't know her as well as he knows Pam.
Author's Response: Thank you! No matter how awesome Karen's pranks get, we all know that Pam would do it better. And if Pam couldn't do it better, it's because of some deficiency in Karen. Right? Yeah, that's my story and I'm stickin' to it!
Date: February 28, 2007 02:15 pm Title: Mosquitoes
OHHOLYCRAPWHATTHEHELL?! jeez, and they say *i'm* bad with cliffhangers. are you crazy? you can't just stop there! if i was a demanding person, i would demand that you continue *immediately*. but i'm not. (you're very lucky.) instead, i shall only *strongly suggest* that you continue...immediately. :0) awesome, by they way. really interesting. good dialogue, too. yay!
Author's Response:
HA! I had a feeling you might take issue with my cliffy. Well, it's okay when I do it!
I have to take a nap (running on 3 hours sleep... ugh) and then write two papers. And then watch Lost. But I swear I'm working on it :)
Date: February 28, 2007 10:13 am Title: Mosquitoes
Okay, "monogrammed relationship" made me spit out cookie crumbs and laugh out loud in the middle of my office. HILARIOUS. I liked that Karen hid the cell phone call - that seems very much in keeping with her, given the deleted scene from "Business School." I can't wait for more! More more more!
Author's Response: Melody! Hi! Yeah, that Business School deleted scene is totally what I was thinking of when I got the idea for this fic. I don't think Karen is a bad person, but she's definitely losing it. It's an unhealthy relationship. And I have to credit WildBerryJam with the idea for Michael to trip over the word "monogamous." Hehehe.
Date: February 28, 2007 10:08 am Title: Mosquitoes
Love, love, love this story! Update soon!
Author's Response: Wow! Three loves! Thanks :)
Date: February 28, 2007 08:47 am Title: Mosquitoes
okay, this seriously has to be updated, like, NOW.
Because you cannot leave it just when it's coming to the good part.
Besides that, thank you for presenting Karen this way. We saw in the ep before Cocktails that she in fact CAN be jealous and petty, and it makes her so wonderfully human.
I'm really enjoying this. Thanks.
cheers.
--Lex
Author's Response: Yup. Karen is capable of some nastiness. It's nice that the writers sort of fleshed her out. I know the cliffy was cruel, but I promise I'm working diligently on the next chapter!
Date: February 28, 2007 08:39 am Title: Mosquitoes
Really liked your view on Karen here--a pretty cool gal but one who's abnormally insecure because she's landed herself in an icky situation that she doesn't entirely understand. Could definitely see her hiding the VM as an act of desperation--she finally had a really nice moment with Jim, and it would ruin it to let Pam back in again.
And good job on character voices! Your Michael was great :)
Author's Response: Perfect explanation of Karen! Nice job! That's exactly how I feel about her. Except each week I lose a little more respect for her because I'm like, "Why are you still with him? It's called self-respect!" But then I think, "Would I ever leave Jim?" He could tell me he had feelings for Dwight and I'd stay with him. Because it's JIM.
10 [Report This]Date: February 28, 2007 08:05 am Title: Mosquitoes
Ooooh - you are so cruel to actually document nice moments between Jim and Karen. It actually hurts to read it. Hope you are planning on making this up to me in the next chapters!!!
Author's Response:
I know I'm cruel! As I was writing I kept thinking, "Ew. I need to stop giving Jim and Karen cute dialogue. EW." I actually deleted some of it, but I just figured that Jim would have cute dialogue with a rock, you know?
But I will definitely begin the process of making it up to you in the next chapter. I figure there will be a couple more chapters after this one. Gotta draw it out, you know? (p.s. getting reviews from you makes me SO happy)