I thought I was just here to read, but I guess I ended up writing a little. My bad. :)
I'm switching to Yes on beta-reader, because I should have more time now that I've finished my own recent story and I'll probably take a break from writing. I don't know how many requests will come from that, so I reserve the right to change back to No if I get overwhelmed. :) But I am an unrepentant grammar Nazi, and have edited a LOT in the past, so I'm totally up for a little beta.
Sometimes Ryan and Kelly talk about babies. Okay... a lot of times. LOL @ "Do we have any duct tape?" This story was so much fun. I love it.
Author's Response: Thank you! Glad you liked it :)
Aw! That was really sweet. Maybe get a beta reader next time, just to clean up the punctuation and dialogue attribution, but other than that little suggestion, I thought it was great. :)
My Mom wants Jim and Pam together right now. If you are Pro-Karen, DO NOT READ! Mom’s so JAMMY she’s suggested they have hot sex on Karen’s casket…
There may be spoilers. My Mom knows all, sees all.
Oh, fabulous! I think my favorites are 1, 3, 10, 13, 18, 23, 27 (neighbors vs. the plasma screen TV!!!!), 29, 32, 33 (kind of oniony--LOL!!), 38, 43, and 47. Give or take. ;)
This is so much fun. I've killed a shipwrecker in fic before, and it's totally cathartic. Hee!
My Mom thanks you! And who was the shipwrecker you killed?
Sigh. It's so sweet and sad. Supportive!Jim is wonderful, but every interaction between those two screams that it should be them getting married, not Pam and Roy. :(
Aw! God, I don't think ANY man would be able to pull off that level of just-friends-ness, but Jim is doing a very convincing job in this story. And Pam needs to leave that bastard, Roy. I'm glad he wasn't quite that bad on the show. Poor Pam!
Author's Response: He's handling it now...from this perspective. There are a few more chapters of this and there will be some changes in the "Jim being supportive front".
Ooh, fun story. I know this is gonna be a good one!
Ha! I love that Dwight is still shunning Andy. Hee!!
This is so much fun. I'm really enjoying the read, and I hope you update soon. I can't wait to get to Truth or Dare!
5 chapters tell 50 Ways that Pam seduces Jim.
Ha! This is great. I love Pam being a sexy flirt. Good for her!
Whee! So much fun! I love #8: "...would you drink this for me? Pretty please?" Hee!
Yay for the hookup!!! This was the bomb:
“Try me,” Pam challenges. He wants to…very, very badly.
I think Jim can handle the homework.
SQUEE! I have loved this story from beginning to end. There are so many good ones! I love that they can each be taken separately but they hook together, too. Kind of like how a string of related sonnets is called a garland...I wonder what these would be called. Well, whatever it is, I love it. :)
This was hilarious:
“Oooh, nice. I can see into the neighbor’s yard from here.”
Hee! I love that the humor extends into every part of their relationship, because I think it honestly will be like that if they (WHEN! I mean when!!) hook up. Which is why they need to just do it already on the show.
Anyway, huge rambling review, but the crux of it is: I loved this fic. So much fun, and so "satisfying." (TWSS)
This is beautiful writing. I absolutely loved it. Succinct but perfectly rendered--nothing more was needed, nothing left wanting. Just a wonderful portrait of the "after" of Jim and Pam. It could be anyone, really, but it's perfect for them. Excellent, excellent job.
Member's Choice - “My father died, so I’ll need a few days.” She explained in an unaffected sounding voice that surprised even herself. The three other parties in the room were stunned into silence. Jim spoke first. “Jesus, Pam…” She stood with her back to him and addressed Michael as if Jim had not made a sound…as if Jim did not exist. It was the only way.
God, I love this story. This is so, so perfect:
“I’m overwhelmed.” She found herself accidentally meaning every word that escaped her mouth every time she opened it…no sound was wasted, and each utterance felt heavy and deliberate.
Really excellent phrasing you've got. I'm enjoying the story so much.
10 No, I think it's perfect. The range of emotions is exciting, even if there's no sex. There doesn't always have to be sex, ya know! (Okay, that's a lie. There does always have to be sex. But it doesn't have to appear in every chapter, so I think you're okay.)
Pam's dad smoked Morleys! Holy crap, Pam's dad is the CSM!!!
Okay, I'm all right now, I think. Hee--that was great.
And another wonderful chapter. I love the way Pam's mom can set aside her own feelings at such a difficult time to encourage Jim and counsel him on the best way to win over her daughter. What a loving mom Pam has! But it so well mirrors Pam's personality that it's very authentic writing. Very, very good. I loved it.
On a grammar/spelling note, in the last chapter (which begins with "She needed time last year," you've got a who's that should be whose: "Pam was a forgiving soul whose emotions..." Just an FYI. :)
ugh thank you. CAN she get a beta? apparently not. lol I have to get on that. Anyway thanks for the correction.
And the Morleys are totally a subconscious reference to Xfiles! lol. My dad smokes Salems, but I didn't want to go with that. So I went with the other brand I know too well ;-) Oh CSM how we hate to love you so.
Damn book shelf! Grr!
Sigh...what a great chapter. What a great kiss!!! I think, ultimately, a kiss like that is what it's going to take. Words aren't what they need. They need action! Hot, steamy action, preferably. ;)
Classic, schmassic--I LOVE the scenario. :)
Jim is so sweet in this chapter--well, in this whole story--and the description of Pam's vision of her dad was great. And Pam finally remembering Jim outside and blaming it on food? Fabulous.
I really love this story. If I have any nitpicks whatsoever, it's just a little punctuation and spelling stuff. Very minor, really. For instance, in the first paragraph, you have "The darkness didn't phase her..." but it should be spelled "faze."
But, yeah, that's no biggie, in my opinion, when the story is this good. You might consider a beta sometime, but other than that, I loooove it.
ugh thank you, spelling is so totally not my forte. You're probably right, I should consider a beta ;-) Thanks for the compliments and correction! I really appreciate it.
This was probably a really bad idea.
Oh, no. It's a really great idea. Believe me. ;)
This is a great story. I'm really loving the way this is bringing them together. And although it's sad that Pam's dad was such a jerk, it really does explain a lot about how she deals with the men she loves. I think Jim is the first man she's loved who really wanted her to be herself and contribute to the friendship, and maybe that's why it's been so hard for her to accept that she loves him. Well, look at me psychoanalyze! ;)
Great story. I look forward to reading more.
No, definitely worth the wait. I love that they're sleeping together--just sleeping, for now. I'm sure it does happen, but I can never buy when people use sex as a tool for dealing with grief. I don't think Jim and Pam would do that, anyway. And that's why I'm kind of glad that Pam didn't have a great relationship with her dad in this story, because when she and Jim have sex, it'll be because they finally realized that they need to, not because Pam needs someone to help her through her grief.
Well, that was rambling, huh? :)
exactly! It always makes me sad if their relationship is consummated because of grief. I'd rather have the grief make them realize things, and consummate later ;-)
Well, clearly, The Pamsicle Incident was bound to be sexy. Poor Jim!
That was just great. Jim really does have a great imagination, and I love the idea that he cultivated that through reading as a kid. Nice job!
In the interest of honesty, I humbly propose some new warnings and disclaimers for rated MA fanfic.
ROUND ROBIN: any writer can add a chapter! What do YOU think our readers should be warned about? Oh, and remember to put your name on your chapter so we can offer you appropriate adulation.
BWAH HA HA HA HA HA!
" WARNING: Odds are that your sexual partner only has two hands."
Sooooooo, so true. This is hilarious!
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