10

Oh, they're so sweet. Interestingly, my husband also attributes the conception of our daughter to a particularly memorable afternoon, despite the math not working out. So you've stumbled into some sort of man-logic truthiness here- nice work! The tone here totally matches the expressions at the end of the ep. I think that's cool.

10

My goodness. This is so sweet, so perfect. I love that she waits in the car for him- no wonder he was so smiley at the weigh-in! And his teasing about setting up for the wedding was pitch-perfect.  Aren't we happy now? Remember our finale angst? It's all OK. They're engaged! And that joy is all the way through this piece. Love it, love you, love them.

Author's Response: Thank you Lis.  Yes - finale angst obliterated.  What a difference an episode makes.  So glad you liked it.  :)

Nice. I particularly like how they absolutely revel in the game at work. So much fun!

Author's Response: I have to imagine that's how it happened.  I also liked the idea of Jim saying "You win."   It brings a whole new meaning to the tag at the end of the episode - if you know what I mean. ;)

Hee! This is very cute, so far, but I must admit my favorite line was the first one in your Story Notes: "Breaking Dawn never happened."   I look forward to seeing where you take this!

I'm glad you're continuing this. Jim is cute when he gets excited about an idea, isn't he?

Author's Response: Haha, yeah, but I think that Jim is always cute so...\r\n

10

Your knack for their dialog kills me. It's more than banter; it's got layers. I love this. And I love that Jim's soda explosion trumps Pam's almost-peeing accident when he refers to this rest area. That's nicely done.

Author's Response: Thanks lis! Most of my ideas for them start with snippets of dialogue and expand from there, so I\'m glad it rings true. And I\'m glad you liked my idea that it started with a problem of Pam\'s but became memorable for what happened to Jim. Thanks for the review! :)

I love the stream-of-consciousness style you use here, and the idea that if you have color and romance in your soul that you need it in your soulmate. Also, the idea that belonging and possessing mean something different when love is there, which it totally is. Beautiful, evocative work.

Yay! This hits just the right note of hopeful, expectant joy. And I must say, usually I am not a fan of exclamation points in prose (in comments is another thing entirely!)- but they are exactly right here. This is exclamatory, excited, joyful, wonderful things that Jim is shouting inside his head before he shouts them on mountaintops, etc. Love this!

Author's Response: Thanks, glad you liked it.  Jim shouting inside is head is exactly how I pictured him as he pulled into the rest stop to see Pam standing there waiting for him.  And thanks for validating my use of the exclamation points...I can, sometimes go a bit overboard.

10

I love stories that focus on the "peripheral" characters (even if I rarely write them myself). This is a lovely, realistic, witty yet sensitive portrayal of two characters who find themselves mostly sane in an insane situation. Great work!

Author's Response: Thank you. I love the peripheral characters so much and love writing them (even if there isn\'t much interest in reading them). Thank you so much for reading and reviewing.

Wow. So beautifully done. Evocative of a very concrete, real time and place that is patently not Scranton, Pennsylvania, but enough remains that it is easy to know who and what we're seeing. I love the call-back to Jinx, not only in the silence, and the unflinchingly rigid Rule, but also in that she, herself, hands him the means to communicate with her, although at this point he can't and won't. More, please.

Author's Response: Thank you, Lis! It\'s nice to know this one\'s satisfying on different levels. More, soon. ;)

This is beautiful. It feels filled with light, somehow. Two wonderful lines:

It’s more like how they were back before he went to Stamford, in the little moments when their eyes would meet and before her brain would whisper another man’s name.
 

A perfect description of then. And this is now:

He reaches up one arm to scratch absently at the neck of his plain white shirt, and it’s pretty much the greatest morning of Pam’s life.

Beautiful.

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Oh. I've had that happen- well not that, exactly, but I got an urgent message from someone stranded at an airport somewhere, but this was before caller ID so I had no way to let them know that I couldn't help them. It's an awful feeling, so yeah, poor Margaret. And poor Pam, thinking that he just didn't care. And Jim, thinking she never tried to call. Great idea, great execution!

Love it. It likely won't be this easy, but I love how in-sync they are in your story, even when a conflict arises. Very sweet, very much in-character.

Author's Response: Thanks nqllisi! So glad you enjoyed it!