That was excellent.  I can see why you say it was exhausting.  There aren't really any wasted words or moments; it's a story without unnecessary filler. 

I haven't read all your stuff, but of what I have read, this one really stands out to me.  It's like you've distilled it so only the good stuff is left.

Excellent job. 

Nice peek at Pam's thoughts.  I especially liked "Pam knew she was in trouble but couldn’t bring herself to agree, no matter how much it hurt."  

This bit "even talking about him too much with her friends" makes me think of Pam's mom... "So which one is Jim?" ;) 

The paragraph that starts: "Her jeans were heavy and her toes squished in her shoes with each step she took, but she had made it here to his house, to him" is my favorite, and I love how it's bookended with, basically, 'Jim means safety and caring.'

The 'friend' thing of course would bring Jim's spirits down a bit.  From your description, I think we'll see that turn around at some point here.

I love the Dwight/DNA bit. ;)

It's good you had Roy break things off.  I do like stories where Pam figures out she should dump Roy, and I would hope in real life she would, but that's not the Pam we ever saw in Season 2.  She only finally broke things off when "push came to shove," really.  She had a confession from Jim, she had feelings, too, and her wedding to Roy was only a few days away. 

So this is really more realistic; Roy dumps her, so she needs to react.  Frumpy Old Beesly is more likely to react than to act. 

Anyway, I'll go on. :) 

Nice!  Pam figured things out pretty quickly, and frankly, Roy's dumped her, so she's a free woman now.   Good for her. :)

I love this: "He checked his room first, hoping, though knowing that he shouldn't hope it, that she would be wrapped up in his sheets. Something he'd dreamed about more often than he cared to admit."  I hope she tells him that they actually spent the night curled up together.  That's so sweet. :)

I'm glad you dusted this off and finished it up, Azlin!  Yay for happiness in Season 2!  (At this point, I'm not convinced there'll be happiness in Season 5, so...yeah.  It's just nice to win one (/Kevin), via your fic.

Nice job. 

Awesome!  First of all, I think it was Paul at one point who said that Jim didn't go to Australia, so you're all set there.

I'm not sure where the "imagine my surprise" one fits in...  Is it just an extra?

I love the "it's not"!  So great! :)

See, this is fun.  The chapters are so quick (to read), that I can keep up with this WIP!  Hurray! 

That postcard put a big smile on my face.

I hope Toby will give Pam the number. 

I'm assuming this is AU and you're not going to do something in the next chapter like "and so she never called, and angsty season 3 happened instead!"  That would be fun for no one. ;) 

She could start with, "So it's not too late for us?" :)  Or whatever you decide. ;) 

Very nice job, Emilys List.  And what a great idea to make the fake pregnancy a real one.  I like that you didn't have Ryan marry Kelly; it doesn't seem that would work out anyway.  Him hanging up on her when she'd bring it up is perfect.

Author's Response: oh, thank you so much! as much as i put on him, i think ryan is ryan and his remodel couldn't be pushed too far.  this fic really made me love ryan and kelly (although to be clear, not ryan/kelly).  it makes me think they should be the spin off :)

No garbage here.  I would hope things wouldn't go that way, and that Andy's proposal caused only a temporary hiccup in Jim's proposal.  I don't really trust that that's the case, though. 

If he doesn't have the good sense to propose before she goes off to NYC, what you have here is the kind of thing that could happen (if it were all real, you know), and you did a really good job portraying it.

I love "I don’t know what that was, but it’s not us.  Talk to me."  That would be a great opportunity for Pam to say, "Where's my proposal????!!"  I'd be beyond angry at Jim at this point.  "Kick my ass," my ass.

Nice job Malaz!  I enjoyed it.

10

Power of Veto!  It took me a while to remember what POV meant on BB.  It's been a while since I've watched it. 

Nice job.  I love his realization about his friends seeing them, the Usher/Usher line, and the whole thing about her getting him hooked on these sorts of shows.

Nice job, Jinxcoke! 

I guess that shows you if you have an idea at 2 AM, you need to go with it.  I usually think, "Wow, what a good idea!  I'll write that tomorrow!"  And then tomorrow comes and the idea is either gone or mostly gone.

I like the feel of the last paragraph; you've really captured something there.  His memories are good, too, in the prior paragraphs, but that's the paragraph that really evokes an image.